


Mind Games

by FlowerladyAerith



Category: Kingdom Hearts
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Drama & Romance, F/M, Multiple Pairings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-02
Updated: 2018-12-19
Packaged: 2019-06-01 01:48:39
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 45
Words: 99,512
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15132428
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FlowerladyAerith/pseuds/FlowerladyAerith
Summary: Sora invites Axel to live as a guest in the home he shares with Kairi without giving her any forewarning. Now, Kairi has to deal with the discomfort of living with an attractive stranger and the disappointment of her wedding to Sora being postponed. Kairi seems to be the only one that wants the marriage to happen and perhaps she is.





	1. New Roommate

"And then Naminé said no wonder the only color he paints with is red cause he has to dig his paintbrush out of his ass every day!" Sora laughed, hard, as though it was the funniest quip known to man.

Kairi smiled at her fiancé from across their small, oak table. Even though she hadn't fully understood his animatedly spoken story, she admired the sparkle in his cerulean eyes. His entire face lit up when he laughed and Kairi never tired of studying him.

"Naminé has gotten pretty bold lately," Kairi commented before stabbing a piece of broccoli with her fork and happily popping it into her mouth.

Sora nodded eagerly. "Yeah! She's really come out of her shell. I remember when she was quiet and would just sit in her office doodling rather than talk to us. I had no idea she could be such a riot."

"I guess she's just a little shy," Kairi answered, hoping to change the subject from the blonde art therapist to their wedding planning. "I was looking at table settings today," she announced bravely.

Sora's face blanked. "Table settings?" he asked mid-chew, "I like the setting we have now."

Kairi giggled and shook her head. "I mean for the wedding reception, Sora!"

He blushed and nodded. "Oh, duh. Find anything you like?"

"Yes, I have the samples in my purse. I wanted to get your opinion before I finalized it."

Sora finished his last bite of steak and let his utensils drop on the empty plate. "Oh, you didn't need to do that. I trust whatever decision you make. Your taste is better than mine, anyway," he assured with a cheesy grin.

Kairi resisted the urge to frown. After all, she should be happy Sora had such blind faith in her taste, right? "I just thought you might want to be more involved…" she trailed off with a forced smile, "Actually, I narrowed down my list of places for the ceremony. I thought we could review those before bed tonight-"

Sora held up his hand and smiled apologetically. "Sorry, Kai. I need to continue editing my paper for the journal tonight. Forgive me?"

Kairi's resistance flopped; the frown on her pink lips could no longer be hidden. "Sora, we've been planning this for years now…" she whispered, "Couldn't I get just a half hour of your time?"

Sora reached over and took Kairi's tender hand in his own. "I know it's frustrating, but I really have to make this deadline for my research," he gently answered. Kairi was always proud to boast that her fiancé was Dr. Sora Yuuki, Ph.D. in Social Psychology. She greatly admired his intelligence and caring disposition. However, it was this same disposition that made him more inclined to do extra work to spare his colleagues and leave her wanting his attention. "I promise I'll give you my undivided attention this weekend!" he added with another grin.

Kairi couldn't help but share his smile. It was hard to resist Sora's grins. They'd always had the ability to cheer her up. "All right, I will save it for this weekend then," she agreed with a playful sigh, "But don't forget, okay?"

He nodded and crossed his heart with his free hand. "Besides, there is something else that will keep you occupied tonight," Sora added hesitantly. Kairi raised a brow. Sora ran his fingers through his brown, spiky hair as he admitted, "I know I should've told you sooner, but a friend is coming to stay with us tonight."

"What?" Kairi yelped; indigo eyes wide as saucers.

Sora squeezed her hand before releasing her. "You see, he's in-between jobs and just needs somewhere to stay while he gets things worked out," Sora hurriedly explained as he took their dinner plates and slipped behind the island counter to wash them in the kitchen sink.

Kairi sunk further into her chair. She hadn't even prepared the guest room; it was still in disarray from when Sora's cousin, Ventus, had stayed with them. "Sora-!" she cried, "Nothing is ready for him!"

His back was to her as he quickly scrubbed. "Don't worry about that, he won't mind at all!" he assured her cheerily.

"So, how long is he staying with us?"

He turned his head and grinned. "Uh…indefinitely for now?"

"Sora!" Kairi cried again, "You can't make these decisions without telling me!"

Sora quickly dried the dishes and put them on the rack next to the sink. He strode over to Kairi and gently seized her shoulders. "I know, I know. I just wanted to help him. I'm sorry, Kai. I should've told you," he cooed. Kairi found her nerve drifting as she inhaled the scent of his cologne. Sora kissed her forehead and then glanced at the clock on the wall. "He'll be here any minute now. I've already given him a key so just show him where the guest room is and he'll be fine."

"W-Wait," Kairi stuttered as she followed Sora to their front door, "Where are you going?"

"Sorry, I'm going to work on my paper at the office. It'll be easier for me to concentrate," Sora apologized as he slipped on his shoes and grabbed his work bag that hung on the coat rack.

"You're going to leave me to greet a stranger?" She followed him down the walkway and to his car, the stockings on her feet scratching against the cement as she agitatedly scurried behind him. "Can't you wait till he arrives?" she pleaded.

Sora shook his head as he unlocked the driver door. "No, the sooner I finish, the sooner I can come back," he explained as he tossed his bag into the passenger seat. "He's really fine, Kai. You'll like him!" He gave her another kiss on her cheek then lowered into his car and shut the door.

Kairi watched, bewildered, as he drove away. She waited until his car had turned left at the stop sign on their block to let her shoulders drop. "I don't even know his name," she murmured as the car disappeared from her sight.

"It's Axel," came a voice from behind her.

Kairi yelped and jumped back, nearly slipping if the stranger hadn't caught her arm. Her eyes met his emerald ones and her breath hitched. He towered over her by at least a foot or so, though part of his height may have been due to his long, red, spiked hair.

"Axel, A-X-E-L, got it memorized?" he asked with a smirk.


	2. Intrusion

Kairi peered at the red-haired man sitting on her yellow couch from her spot in the kitchen. It had been three days since he'd come to live with her and Sora, and she still had no idea how Sora knew such a strange fellow. She'd known Sora since they were children playing in the ocean of Destiny Islands together. She'd gone to Twilight U with him, and eventually settled in the town with him when he proposed at her graduation dinner. Sora and Kairi had been engaged and living together for five years, and not once had he mentioned any friend named "Axel".

She thought he looked suspicious and she wondered if Sora was telling her the truth. From the long, spiked mane, tear drop tattoos under his eyes, and his black wardrobe, Kairi had surmised there was a good reason he was in-between jobs.

Kairi felt flustered as she turned back to finish the dishes she was hand-washing. Her own red brows knitted together as she furiously scrubbed the plate in her hand. How was she supposed to entertain Axel if she didn't know a single thing about him? Sora hadn't exactly been forthcoming with details when she'd confronted him again. He only insisted Axel was a great friend and wouldn't be any trouble to house for as long as needed.

She blew a piece of her bang out of her eyes. _'Easy to say that when you aren't the one at home!'_

"Did that plate do something to you?"

Kairi nearly shrieked, dropping the plate into the soapy, pomegranate-smelling water. The sound of his chuckles flustered her further. "Did you have to sneak up on me like that?" she grumbled, "I could have broken the plate."

Axel tapped his chin with a gloved hand. "Hm, I wasn't trying to sneak up on you, sweetheart. But if that's the kind of relationship you want to establish between us, I can take care of that," he mused with another sly smirk.

Kairi dropped the sponge she'd been using in the water and twirled around to face him. "Don't call me that!" she cried, "I'm not your sweetheart."

Axel shoved his hands in the pockets of his black skinny jeans and tilted his head at her. "And here I thought we would become friends," he commented dryly.

"Friends call each other by name."

"Last time I checked nicknames were a thing," he countered with a shrug.

"Sweetheart is not a nickname!"

"Oh?" Axel questioned. He bent down to look her in the eyes. "Enlighten me. What is it then?"

Kairi flushed under his gaze before muttering, "Harassment."

Axel sighed and threw his hands up in defeat, rather dramatically. "Touché, princess! Can't have myself thrown out because I harassed you."

"Princess?"

He smirked. "You didn't like sweetheart."

She rolled her eyes. "Whatever. Why don't you make yourself useful and finish the rest of the dishes?"

Axel gave her a low bow, smirk never leaving his features. "As you wish," he breathed.

Kairi sidestepped and hurried out of the kitchen. She slumped into a dining chair, happy to be away from him. What was Sora thinking by letting Axel live with them? Had Sora even spent more than thirty minutes with the guy?

She stared at the papers and books that were scattered across her dining room table. Her eyes wearily read the titles blaring out at her. "Easy Wedding Planning", "The Importance of Appearance", "Wedding Planning 101", and "Everything You'll Need to Get Hitched" had become her best friends over the years of her engagement to Sora.

She gathered the magazine clippings she'd been looking through; her fingers lingered on the photo of a blonde woman in a beautiful lace and pearl wedding gown. Kairi absently sighed before tucking it with the other clippings. She hadn't had the opportunity to pick a dress yet because Sora had yet to choose a season or date for their wedding. Unfortunately, Twilight Town had starkly different weather patterns, based on season, unlike Destiny Islands which was warm all year round.

"Getting hitched?"

Kairi stifled her surprise and glared up at Axel's towering form. "For the record, I didn't agree to establishing the sneaking pattern between us," she spat.

Axel merely shrugged. "I can't help that you're not paying attention to what's around you."

She opened her mouth to argue, but soon realized she had no rebuttal. Instead she chose to sigh and nod. "Yes, Sora and I are getting married. He didn't tell you?"

Axel placed a gloved hand on the surface of the table as he began looking through the materials Kairi had gathered. He gingerly flipped the pages of "The Importance of Appearance", seemingly uninterested by everything on the pages. Perhaps all men weren't interested in the intricacies of wedding planning.

"He mentioned having someone special," Axel hummed as he gazed at the text on the page, "But I met Sora a while back. It's possible you weren't engaged at that time."

Curiosity piqued, Kairi dared to ask, "When did you meet Sora?"

Axel chuckled, "He didn't tell you anything about me, did he? Typical." Kairi couldn't have agreed more. "I met Sora about three years ago. I was applying to work as a research assistant in the Psychology Department and I ran into him after a bad interview. He told me he couldn't offer me a position either, but somehow we became friends and I saw him on campus from time to time."

"We've been engaged for five years," Kairi muttered.

Axel let out a surprised whistle. "Five years? That's a long ass time. What's the hold up? You can't decide between beige and buff napkins or somethin'?"

"What?" Kairi cried, "No! I could care less what our table settings look like!" She felt herself deflate as she continued, "The right time to have the ceremony has just never come around so I've just been planning this entire time hoping that Sora would catch up to me…"

Axel sighed, "Bummer. Sorry to hear that, princess."

She wasn't in the mood to bicker with Axel anymore. She simply nodded and shoved her clippings into the plastic bag she kept them in. Axel slid into the seat next to her, easily maneuvering his slender frame between the edge the table and the back of the chair. Kairi envied how lithe he was.

She watched as he continued to flip through her book. It looked like he wasn't going to leave her alone any time soon. "So, psychology? I never would have pegged you as the type," Kairi commented.

Axel grinned at her, looking straight into her eyes with his electric gaze. "Au contraire, _princess_. I love a good mind game."


	3. Planning Tips

"Is that all you needed from me, Kai?" Sora asked as he hovered over her with his bag on his shoulder. He'd promised his undivided attention that Saturday, but it had evolved into his rushed attention. Apparently, one of his graduate students needed his supervision and he had to go to the lab as soon as possible.

Kairi reluctantly nodded. "Yes, I'll follow up with the chapel you liked on Monday," she concluded as she looked up into his bright face. He grinned at her and placed a kiss on the top of her red head. She happily inhaled the spice of his cologne, relishing in the few moments she had with him that morning.

"You are wonderful!" he beamed, "I'll see you tonight for dinner, okay?"

"All right. See you then," she whispered, trying not to sound disappointed that he wouldn't be home sooner.

Sora hurried to the door and called out, "Bye Axel!" before he shut the front door after him. Axel absently waved his hand, not bothering to take his eyes off the television screen in front of him. After all, the brunette was already gone anyway.

Kairi returned to her books, making note of Sora's preferences in her planning journal. She'd started it two years ago when she realized she was going to forget everything she wanted by the time she and Sora finally decided on a date. Sora always claimed the dates Kairi suggested were too soon or too impossible given the way his semesters were organized. Eventually, the two settled on waiting till he'd published a few research articles since he was just starting his career as a researcher and professor at Twilight U when he proposed. But as the years passed, it was becoming harder for Kairi to ignore the growing bitterness and disappointment as Sora continued to deny her.

"Strawberry cake, huh? That won't be popular," Axel mumbled over her with a cluck of his tongue, "You should do something more traditional like tuxedo. Everyone likes tuxedo cake."

She fought the spasm that shook through her body. One of these days Axel was not going to take her by surprise. She slammed her journal shut and placed it on her lap. "I don't remember asking for your opinion," she quipped as she turned to face him.

He was dressed in his usual attire today. Black tank, black skinny jeans, and black gloves that didn't fully cover his palms. She wondered if he owned any other clothing that was less edgy.

"I gave it free of charge," Axel answered with a chuckle, "Figured you might appreciate it since you'll be spending your life savings on this wedding."

"Ha. Ha," Kairi deadpanned, "I've had five years to save up for this, Axel. Trust me when I say that our finances are in order."

He shrugged. "I just think you could find all that stuff you marked much cheaper at discount stores."

"As if. I'd love to see you try to find my list at discount stores," Kairi argued with a fold of her arms.

Axel grinned, flashing his pearly teeth at her. "Watch me."

And she did. Axel quickly grabbed his laptop and plunked down in the seat beside her. Within fifteen minutes, he'd located half of her wish list for 50% less. Kairi's jaw dropped as she began recalculating her costs. A few thousand munny had already been knocked off her final cost estimate.

"Axel, how-?"

Axel flexed his long fingers and shoved the computer screen toward her. "Let's just say, I've been a best man before," he answered quietly.

Kairi stifled a laugh. "You? A best man?"

He ran his fingers through his red mane. "What? I have friends, you know."

She smirked. "I suppose you refer to them all as sweetheart?"

Axel's eyes widened before settling into an amused expression. "No, Kairi. That would be  _harassment._ "


	4. Coming Together

Axel noisily consumed his cheerios at the dining table, eyes glued to the television screen. Kairi watched with mild disgust as he flipped channels from his seat with the remote. All he ever seemed to do was watch TV. She wondered how many job applications he'd even filled out.

She slipped on her black high heels and straightened her pencil skirt and white blouse in the mirror of the entrance way. Sora had initially disagreed with having a mirror at the entrance of their town home, but Kairi had convinced him last minute checks could be useful. Now, he checked his tie every morning before leaving to work.

"Leaving?"

Kairi grabbed her purse from the coat rack; it was a medium-sized, black tote bag with pink jewels adorning the pockets. She slung it over her shoulder and gave Axel a nod. "Yes, some of us have to work during the day."

"Ha," Axel deadpanned from his seat, "Your wit never ceases to amaze me, Kairi. Think of that insult long?"

"No. I try not to think about you at all." She ignored her urge to smile; she didn't want to admit Axel had grown on her just a bit, especially not to him.

He let his spoon fall against the edge of the bowl as he turned to face her. Kairi was surprised by the intensity behind his gaze. Had she truly offended him or was he joking? "Just for that, I'm going to eat all your cereal while you're gone," he confessed with a mischievous grin.

"I don't eat cereal."

"Fine, you can explain to Sora why his is all gone." He paused, then asked, "What do you even do anyway?"

"I'm the head HR person for a tech company."

Axel snorted, "Figures you'd do something so boring."

She frowned. Resisting the urge to be offended, she fired back. "Oh? And what is your career? Getting rejected by psychology professors?"

"Nah, research is my focus. I love figuring out how something ticks."

His eyes were boring into her. She felt her breath escaping her as he refused to look away. She cleared her throat and shuffled toward the door. "Well, I hope you won't eat all of Sora's cereal…he'll be disappointed. Try not to burn the place down," she muttered before slipping out the door.

She wrapped her arms around herself as she quickly walked to her car. What was it about Axel that unsettled her? She couldn't decide between his penetrating gaze, sarcastic comments, or the mysteriousness of his person.

* * *

 

"I'm home!" Kairi called as she shut the front door. She was surprised when she wasn't greeted. She checked the clock on her phone and saw that it was already 6:30 PM. Where were Sora and Axel?

She kicked off her shoes and wandered to the dining table where she found a note next to her wedding planning materials. She unfolded the clean, white paper and immediately recognized Sora's chicken scratch. In all the years they'd been together (since they were 16), his poor penmanship had not improved.

_Kairi & Axel,_

_Working late tonight. Will eat at the office. I'll see you both when I get home._

She grumbled and balled up the paper. Sora was already starting off the week away from her. Thanks to his graduate student she'd hardly seen him over the weekend. Sometimes she hated how hard-working he was. Sucking down her anger, she turned her attention to her materials. She was surprised to see there was a stickie note on top of her journal.

_Kairi,_

_Went to finish some job apps and follow up on leads. I took the liberty of looking through your journal and left you some notes that helped my friends when they were planning. Happy to answer any questions. -Axel_

"Notes?"

Immediately, Kairi flipped through her journal discovering all the pink stickie notes Axel had left for her. Each note included suggestions for cheaper options, vendors, and deals he'd learned from watching his friends plan. She sunk into her seat, processing what Axel had given her. She hadn't even known about half of the places he'd recommended.

She was snapped out of her stunned silence by the slam of the front door. Axel strolled into the room, shoes still on his feet. Instead of reprimanding him, she jumped to her feet and pulled him into a hug.

"Whoa, princess!" Axel cried, bracing himself against her unexpected assault.

"Thank you, Axel! You are a lifesaver!"

Releasing him, she pulled him down into a seat and sat next to him. Axel looked bewildered, but Kairi chose to ignore his appearance. She could feel her eyes watering as she began explaining her situation. "You see, one of the reasons I think Sora has postponed our wedding all these years is because, like you said, weddings are so expensive," she confessed with a small frown, "I've worked so hard to cut costs but it was starting to feel impossible so I'd started investing some of my munny to earn some to put toward the ceremony, reception, and honey moon. But this…this is wonderful. I can't thank you enough!"

He simply smirked and nonchalantly waved his hand at her. "Heh. It was nothin'."

"Oh, but it was so much more…you have no idea how much-"

Axel tapped his index finger to his temple. "Kairi, if you have a dream, don't wait. Act. One of life's little rules. Got it memorized?"

Kairi smiled at him. Perhaps there was a reason Sora had taken a liking to Axel. It was then she realized he was dressed in slacks, white button-down, and a tie. Turns out he could clean up if he wanted. Her intrigued eyes rested on his broad shoulders, following his collarbone to his Adam's apple.

Axel cleared his throat. "See something you like?"

"What? No, I was just-"

Axel leaned toward her and winked. "Looking never hurt anyone."

Kairi flushed and quickly averted her eyes, choosing instead, to focus on the paopu fruit-shaped cookie jar on the top of her fridge. Sora had bought it for her for her twenty-fourth birthday with a note that said their destinies were further entwined with every cookie she ate. The reminder soothed her. She may have found Axel easy on the eyes, but Sora would always have her heart and future.

"I believe we were discussing my fiancé," she eventually replied.

Axel feigned a pout. "Ah yes, Sora. I have to say you chose well, Kairi. He's as dependable, bright, and sweet as they come!" He gave her a quiet round of applause with his hands. "But since we're having a moment and all, I have to ask why you put up with these delays. What's really going on?" He raised a brow. "I can't express how interested I am in these  _other_  reasons you alluded to."

"And you'll have to stay that way." She closed her journal and asked, "Is there anything you'd like for dinner? I'd be happy to make something for you."

"I'll just have what you're having," he surrendered.

She nodded. "Spaghetti it is," she announced, hoping out of her seat, "Let me go change and I'll start cooking." She turned and walked toward the hall that led to the stairs, completely missing the genuine smile Axel gave her retreating frame.


	5. Department Party

Axel yanked at the collar of his starched, button-down shirt. Whoever thought men needed to wear button-downs and nice pants (even in the summer) to look good needed a lesson in fashion. He would've been more comfortable in his usual tanks, especially with the Twilight Town sun beaming down on him. He could feel the beads of sweat forming on his back.

Still, he was grateful Sora and Kairi had invited him to come along to Sora's department party. It had been a while since he'd been around stuffy academics, and there was nothing he enjoyed more than pushing the buttons of egotistical, old guys. He was next to Sora now, beer in hand, watching the brunette discuss personality traits with his peer.

Normally, he forgot Sora was an academic, but it was moments like this that reminded him how brilliant the unsuspecting, large shoe'd clown was. It was hard to believe the blue-eyed man was old enough to fit in with the crowd. If Axel remembered correctly, Sora was a thirty-something now, like himself.

"But Myers-Briggs has no backing from research!" Sora exclaimed, "How can it be a reliable assessment without being proven so?"

His colleague, Riku, smirked at him. "Sora, sometimes there are things that statistics alone can't reveal. If people take the assessment and feel it has revealed truth to them, that cannot be discounted," he answered coolly.

Sora stomped his foot. "But people are being misled!"

Axel stifled a snort. Of course it was hard to believe; Sora still acted like a fussy teenager bickering with his friends. He could tell Sora and Riku could easily spend all evening arguing about the merits of personality assessments. Tuning out, Axel gazed across the backyard they were standing in. Sitting at the picnic tables in the corner was Kairi…and a few other women. He supposed they were all professor's wives or something.

He sipped his beer as he continued to watch her. Kairi was wearing a simple, lilac sundress that loosely hugged her figure. Axel had to admit she looked more comfortable in her choice of attire than he did in his. He watched as she tucked a piece of her red hair behind her ear, laughing at whatever the woman across from her had shared. She looked carefree, almost angelic, and her movements were absolutely regal; completely fitting of the nickname he'd chosen to give her.

There was something innocent about her; she reeked of kindness and sincerity. Axel was sure her natural scent was as sweet as her personality, though he'd never dared to lean in close enough to smell for himself. However, tempted he might have been…. Which was precisely why he chose to watch her from afar now, in her natural state. Happy.

His eyes drifted to Sora, whom was still heatedly debating an impassive Riku. He wondered how the brunette could stand not to tie the knot with his flawlessly beautiful fiancé. He'd spent many a night wondering what could be the cause of his stalling and he hadn't gotten any closer to the answer.

Even now he couldn't fathom how Sora could find more pleasure in arguing with Riku than spending time with Kairi. The man was hardly ever home. Axel thought he'd spend this party annoyed by their public affection, but the only interaction they'd had was the light conversation on the car ride there.

"Excuse me, gents," he suddenly announced with a tip of his cup, "I'll need a refill to continue listening to this riveting conversation."

He heard Riku's scoff as he departed. Axel couldn't help but smirk. At least he'd annoyed one of them.

Axel strolled over to the keg and leisurely refilled his red, solo cup. His eyes flicked back to Kairi. He found himself focused on the silver charm bracelet on her right arm. There were five, silver hearts dangling around her wrist on a brilliantly silver chain. Perhaps a gift from Sora? He finished filling his cup and began his slow approach. After all, temptation can only be fought off for so long before it must be indulged.

"How is the planning going?" he heard the brunette girl across from her ask.

Kairi answered, "Oh, it's going fine. I think we'll have a date picked out soon!" She curled her pink lips into a stunning smile that Axel suspected was forced.

The girl frowned. "But you always say that. Is everything really okay, Kairi?"

"Of course, Olette. I know we've had some setbacks, but things are really looking up."

The girl called Olette didn't appear convinced. She leaned closer to Kairi and began speaking in a hushed voice. Axel slowed his stride and pretended he wasn't listening. "Have the two of you been…intimate?"

Kairi's immediate blush was hilarious, but also mildly alarming to Axel. She leaned toward Olette. "No, not since…well, not for a while. He's been so busy. He hardly even looks at me these days."

"Kairi, that's not okay!" Olette pipped up, before dropping her voice again, "Have you talked about it?"

Kairi shook her head. "No, I…I feel like he isn't attracted to-"

"Kairi! Fancy seeing you here, looking as radiant as ever!" Axel announced jovially as he slipped into the bench next to Kairi. He leaned on the table with his elbow and winked. "Sora better finish the deal quick before someone whisks you away."

Olette laughed and turned to Kairi. "And who is this?"

Kairi rolled her eyes and sipped her wine before answering, "My new roommate."

"It's Axel," he added, "And I hear your name is Olette."

The brunette's face lit up. "Really? You've heard of me?"

Axel smirked. "Of course, I've got it memorized. You're Kairi's friend. Kairi and I are pretty close now." He placed his long arm around Kairi's shoulder and gave her a squeeze. "You could even say we're inseparable." Olette's jaw dropped.

Kairi lightly pushed his arm off her. "I don't think anyone says that, Axel," she replied, "But yes, I agree, we're friends now. And he has been a huge help to me, Olette." Axel suppressed his surprise and instead chose to focus on Olette's tanned, beaming face.

"What luck that he moved in!" Olette exclaimed.

Kairi sipped her wine and eyed Axel in a way that made his stomach churn. "Yeah, what luck," she agreed without removing her gaze from his.

"Well, I have other friends to visit so I'll see you ladies later," Axel announced, quickly departing the table. He trudged away, listening to Olette giggle about how handsome he was despite Kairi's pleas to change the subject. Unfortunately, he missed the genuine, over-the-shoulder smile Kairi gave his retreating form.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just mentioning that this has no reflection on my thoughts on the MBTI or any other personality test for that matter. I enjoy most of them, even the ones on Buzzfeed that determine what type of toast you are, haha.


	6. Confrontation

Axel occupied his usual spot on Sora and Kairi's bright, yellow couch. The color had initially annoyed him, because it seemed to symbolize the light and happiness he imagined the couple shared. Now, it amused him because it was so contradictory. In fact, the couch was the only thing vibrant in the apartment, everything else felt neglected. Especially the resident, red-haired lady.

Since he moved in he had carefully observed the way the Sora and Kairi household functioned. Most days Kairi got up whenever Sora did, regardless of when she was scheduled to work, just to spend some time with him. Sora left each morning, sometimes never returning until the wee hours of the night. Axel hardly heard him speak any words to Kairi or himself when he was home, and if he did, it was over a quick dinner. He always claimed he was tired or that he had an early morning. Axel found this annoying, but Kairi seemed undaunted and hung on every one-word sentence Sora uttered.

Kairi spent her free morning and evening time planning at her oak table. She always had new ideas to suggest to Sora and half the time he bothered to pause and listen to them. She was a champion of sucking down her emotions and focusing on positivity. Axel found her sweetness sickening, and found himself choking on the artificial sugar most days. Sure, she was attractive, but goodness could she grow a backbone?

This was why he was so surprised and curious tonight. He sat still on the couch with perked ears. Sora and Kairi were actually arguing! And it wasn't just simple, disagreement grumbling. It was a full-blown shouting match that could be heard clearly through the walls!

"I can't take this anymore, Sora!"

Axel smirked despite himself. Was she finally confronting him? Oh, how he'd waited for this! Even sweet women like Kairi had a cracking point.

He straightened his spine in anticipation. How would Sora reply? Axel may have detested Kairi's saccharine attitude, but he felt for her. Sora had been completely ignoring her for who knows how long and he deserved every scathing remark Kairi dared let escape her dainty, pure lips. Axel only wished he could see through walls.

"You're never here! You've left me completely alone with a stranger!"

Axel winced. Stranger? Ouch.

"But you have a new friend now!" Sora countered.

"That may be so, but that is no excuse for telling me nothing about him and not being around to help us both feel comfortable around each other."

Axel smirked. Feeling better to be elevated from 'stranger' to 'friend' within the same breath.

"You know I'm busy," Sora accused, "There are so many people out there that need me, Kairi. You know I'll always come back to you so why is waiting such a big deal?"

"But Sora, I need you!"

"Don't you think I know that?"

"No. You always put your work and friends before me. You didn't even speak to me at your department party."

"You're mad because of a party?"

"No! I'm mad because we've been engaged for five years and you aren't even interested in finally getting married. Doesn't it bother you? Don't you want me as much as I want you?"

Axel's ears burned. Perhaps he shouldn't listen anymore. This sounded like it was going to turn into a romantic conversation that led to activities Axel was keen to tune out. At least, if he had been in Sora's shoes he would have turned the course of the conversation that direction. After all, Kairi was attractive and judging from what he overheard at the party she was in need of some attention…

"Sora, please say something!"

The silence was overwhelming. Even Axel could feel his heartbeat quicken in his chest. Why he even cared was a mystery to him.

"Kairi, stop. I have to go out of town tonight…"

Axel strained to hear the rest of the sentence; Sora had dropped his volume and he could hardly hear what was being said. The redhead quietly rose from the couch and tiptoed closer to the hall that led to the bedrooms. The sound of a crash jolted him and he jumped back toward the couch. Something was wrong and as much as he had enjoyed the drama, he didn't want either of his friends hurt.

Axel jumped onto the cushions just as Sora came zipping out of the hall. His eyes followed the flustered brunette all the way to the front door.

"Sora!" he called, stopping the brunette from checking his tie in the mirror. Axel turned his body to face him, mentally pinching himself for getting involved. He was sure he would regret it; it wasn't the first time he'd involved himself in friends lover's spats. "Everything all right? Sounds like something broke."

Sora grinned, not missing a beat. "Oh, yeah, haha," he muttered with a scratch of his head, "Everything's fine. I accidentally knocked over a lamp. Kairi's cleaning it up if you want to help her. I have to go…"

Axel's lips tightened into a line. Sora was just trying to save face. Axel dismissed him with a wave of his hand. "Yeah, yeah. See you when you get back. I'll go help your  _fiancé._ " Sora didn't hesitate and was out the door.

Axel forced himself to stroll over to the Sora and Kairi bedroom and poke his fiery head through the crack in the door. Kairi was sitting on the carpeted floor around the colorful shards of the broken lamp with her head in her hands. He felt his heart lurch as he unwillingly observed her raw misery. Her quiet sobs were too much for him to process.

Turning away, he steeled himself and went to grab a broom. He tapped her shoulder with the bottom of it and weakly smiled at her once she lifted her head. Her teary eyes weakened his defenses as he continued to mentally berate himself for caring. "Thought you could use this," he offered with forced nonchalance.

Kairi wiped her eyes and giggled, much to Axel's surprise. "I can't sweep on the carpet," she whispered in a small, pathetic voice. Axel uncomfortably retracted his arm and watched as she began to pick up the larger pieces. One question haunted his mind. How could she smile and giggle? What reason did she have to be cheery? There was something seriously wrong with her and Axel did not want to be around to pick up  _her_ shattered pieces.

"Well, aren't you going to get me a vacuum?" Her voice made him freeze. She glanced up again, mesmerizing him with her pretty eyes.

He cleared his throat. "Uh, sure, Kairi," he muttered while slinking toward the door.

She eyed him with a surprisingly determined look. "It's Princess Kairi to you."

Axel couldn't help but crack a smirk. "As you wish." And with a dramatic bow, he hurried away to retrieve what she'd asked for.

There was something wrong with her but maybe he liked it.

"Hurry up you lazy bum!" she shouted down the hall.

Oh hell, he definitely liked it.


	7. Taken

It'd taken her a half hour extra to look decent this morning. Kairi hardly slept because she'd spent most of the night crying over her argument with Sora. She couldn't stop imagining the look on his face when he pushed her away. Where had the love in his eyes gone to?

Plus, he hadn't returned any of her texts or calls; he hadn't even messaged to say he'd made it to wherever he went safely. She was sure he thought she was ungrateful, and couldn't be bothered with her dramatics until he returned home. Whenever that was.

Her tired eyes bored into her computer screen as she tried to complete the day's last task: approving the month's time sheets. She sighed; July had come to an end and still she was no closer to marrying Sora. Of anything, it seemed even more bleak.

She felt her heart skip a beat. Would he return home and declare their engagement over?

Kairi let out a quiet, frustrated groan and ran her fingers through her red hair. If only she could reach Sora and apologize! She had been selfish and she had to tell him so. She regretted ever confronting him about his distance. Sora already had the weight of the worlds on his shoulders, worrying about and trying to help people he'd never even met. Sora was selfless, brave, and passionate. These were qualities Kairi loved about him; how could she criticize him for behavior stemmed from them?

Her eyes glanced down to her black cell phone. Hopefully, she pressed the screen button but deflated when she saw there were no new messages. What was he doing? He'd admitted she was important so why couldn't he at least text her that he was busy or something?

"Yo!"

Kairi jolted at the sight of Axel standing near the opening of her cubicle. He was so tall; he towered over the shorter, gray privacy dividers. She gaped at him, words unable to find their way out of her lips as she continued to look at his body.

"Princess?" he questioned further, lowering himself to her height in her office chair. His emerald eyes drifted around her cubicle, inspecting the photos of family and friends from years past. As well as, the remains of her takeout lunch and the stack of papers she would file tomorrow. He snorted at her chocobo calendar before returning his examining eyes to her person.

She flushed as his eyes obviously dropped from hers and landed on her chest. It was then she'd realized her top buttons had come undone on her peach blouse. Her face warmed and she quickly turned away from him to hide the top of her creamy bosom.

Axel cleared his throat. "I came to get you for-"

"We told you! You can't come back here!"

Kairi turned back around to see a panting Hayner and Pence now crowded around her cubicle. Hayner and Pence were the IT guys assigned to her floor. She often called them for help troubleshooting her software that never seemed to agree with her desktop. She'd become so close to the pair over the years, she'd even tried to set Hayner on a blind date with Olette. Olette still hadn't given in to her pestering; the woman claimed it was too weird.

The blonde, Hayner, stuck his finger out at Axel's face and declared, "If you won't leave willingly, I'll force you out myself!" His brown eyes were fierce, like a puppy determined to take the bone out of his master's hands.

Pence, the darker haired fellow, chuckled nervously behind his friend. His hands found their way to his palm tree styled hair, shaking. "H-Hayner, calm down!" he stuttered before turning to Kairi, "We're so sorry, Kairi. He caught up to us while we were scanning our IDs to get back in the building after Hayner's smoke break."

Finally, she found her words. "Axel, how did you even know where I worked?" she asked, wishing she had reprimanded his breaking and entering behavior instead of sounding amazed.

Axel smirked. His ego already appearing to inflate. "I went through your opened mail and found the company name on the top of one of your pay stubs," he began to explain, "So I strolled over, and when I mentioned your name to these idiots at the door they cried they wouldn't let me bother you on the third floor."

Hayner's anger seemed to boil over. "Hey! We're not idiots!"

Axel simply ignored him and grabbed Kairi's wrist and yanked her from her chair. She yelped as he pulled her to his body. She had never touched him; he was surprisingly firm despite his lanky appearance. "H-Hey!" she shouted, struggling to pull away from him as he began to drag her down the hall. She was suddenly grateful most of the staff on her floor left earlier than she did.

"I'm taking you to dinner tonight," Axel announced, "If you don't hurry, we'll miss our reservation."

"What?" Kairi squeaked.

She heard a slam and turned her head to see Hayner running toward her with an opened stapler. She tried to hide her grimace as Axel easily pushed him back by his forehead. Hayner fell to the ground, stapler and all. Pence hurried to his friend, still trembling in his black, no-slip, work shoes.

"I'll call the police!" he swore once he checked that Hayner wasn't seriously injured.

As Kairi was forced around the corner, she shouted, "It's okay! He's my roommate!"

It looked like she was going to have to finish approving those time sheets tomorrow.


	8. Dinner Reservations

"Come on, Kairi!"

Kairi grumbled under her breath as she hastily applied her finishing touches of makeup. It was strange enough that Axel had found his way to her place of work and dragged her home, but since when did they have dinner reservations? As soon as they were home, he'd told her it was a 'swanky joint' and that she should put on something nice.

When she argued she'd need to shower, he told her there was no time. Kairi anxiously ran a brush through her hair hoping it didn't look as oily as it felt. With him rushing her, she hadn't even had time to use dry shampoo. Still, she wasn't completely disappointed with her appearance.

She'd put on a black dress with a sweetheart bust and off-the-shoulder sleeves. The skirt ended just above her knees and the waist hugged her just right, emphasizing her hour glass figure. She chose to wear a pair of dark red pumps for some color and accessorized with some silver jewelry, including her charm bracelet. Sora had given the bracelet to her during the second year of their engagement with two heart charms; he'd added a heart every year since. It was the only evidence she had that Sora also noticed the length of their engagement.

"Kairi!" came Axel's whine.

"I'm coming!" she shouted back as she fluffed her hair one last time. She frowned a moment as she stared at her pale reflection. Maybe if she cut her hair short again Sora would want to be the one rushing her out to nice dinners? She shook her head, eyed her silver, engagement ring, and sighed as she trudged out to the living area.

Axel was standing by the doorway, running a finger through his long, red mane. Her eyes focused on his teardrop tattoos as he looked at her. He was wearing a deep v-neck, black sweater and a fitting pair of dark wash jeans. His sleeves were rolled up to his elbows showing off his surprisingly chiseled forearm. How was he so fit? Kairi had never even seen him exercise.

His eyes hovered over her figure, long enough to make her squirm, before he grabbed her purse off the hook and tossed it to her. She caught it and yelped, "Hey!" as he pulled open the door.

"I'm driving!" Axel called as Kairi was locking the door.

She furrowed her brow. "You don't even have a car!"

"Oh, don't I?"

Axel was leaning against the passenger door of a car that was darker than night. "W-Where?" was all she could stammer as she walked closer. She placed her hand on a door handle to confirm what she was seeing was real.

"Just because I'm in-between jobs doesn't mean I have no money or property," Axel explained. He pulled open the passenger door and gestured for her to get inside. "Mi'lady."

She quickly ducked inside, completely flustered. Axel climbed in and soon they were on their way to a restaurant Kairi did not even know the name of.  _Oh, Sora. What have you gotten me into?_

* * *

Axel settled in across from her at their square, glass table. The name of the restaurant was Corkscrew, and according to Axel, they had an amazing wine selection. Kairi couldn't picture Axel coming to a restaurant like Corkscrew in his free time, though. The place was the definition of posh: lush curtains, sparkling, crystal décor, with expensive-looking canvas paintings lining the walls.

Kairi was flabbergasted by his choice of restaurant and his behavior. He'd acted like a complete gentleman. Axel had opened the car door for her, opened the restaurant door for her, helped her to her seat, and already ordered a round of wine claiming to the waiter she'd had a rough day. She couldn't help but wonder who he really was; she'd never expected any of this from him.

"This is on me so order whatever you want," Axel offered with a wave of his hand.

Kairi blinked. "But aren't you-"

Axel smirked. "I already told you. I may be in-between jobs but I'm not broke. I can take you out," he chuckled, "Least I can do. After all, I've been eating all of Sora's cereal."

Kairi laughed despite herself. "I think that means Sora should be here, not me," she countered as the waiter set down their wine glasses. She eyed the dark liquid in the glass curiously. Did Axel even really know about wines?

"Will you start with an appetizer tonight?" the waiter asked.

Axel glanced at Kairi and slowly smirked. The look in his eyes sent shivers down her spine that weren't completely unwelcome. She flushed.  _What am I even thinking?_

"Sure!" Axel suddenly answered, "It's a special night for the little lady and myself, after all. Right, princess? Tonight is our sixth wedding anniversary." Kairi's jaw could have dropped to the floor.

The waiter looked absolutely pleased. "The appetizer will be on the house!" he declared, "For the lovely couple, I'll bring you two the best thing on the menu."

As soon as he was gone, Kairi reached across the table and grabbed Axel by the dip in his sweater. "What are you saying?" she hissed, "We're not married!"

Axel put up his hands in surrender. "Princess, calm down. Have a sip of wine. I'll explain my plan to you in due time," he suggested calmly. Kairi hated that he wasn't even fazed by her aggression, but she complied nonetheless.

She settled into her seat and picked up the glass. "What is this anyway?" she grumbled.

"Try it."

Kairi rolled her eyes and took a sip. The red wine was surprisingly sweet and bubbly. How could Axel have known that is what she preferred? Did Sora tell him? She set the glass down and met his emerald gaze. He was so composed but her heart was pounding.

"It's really good," she finally replied, "Thank you…but don't think you can just go around pretending we're married."

Axel ran a hand through his red hair. Kairi wondered if it was soft or hardened by hair gel. "Look Kairi, this is the deal," he explained, leaning toward her with his elbows on the table, "You don't want to talk about you and Sora, I get it. But I'm very observant so you don't have to tell me about the crying and the distance. I thought you could use a night out so I arranged this for you. Just play along. If you hate it at the end of the night…I'll leave."

"What? Why would you leave?"

He raised a brow. "You'd miss me?"

"Of course I would!" She paused.  _What am I saying?_ But she knew it was true. Axel had grown on her. Axel was a good friend and her home wouldn't be the same without him. "I would…yes. I'll play along but if I hate it just don't do it again…and I won't tell Sora."

Axel clucked his tongue. "Already feeling guilty, princess?"

"I have nothing to feel guilty about, but I doubt Sora would like this little plan of yours."

"Why?" The tone in his voice caught her off guard. It was like he was cornering her with his voice.

She found herself stammering, "B-Because he's my fiancé! This is too much like an actual date, don't you think? It would bother him."

"Would it really?"

She felt flustered as his eyes bored through her head. "Y-Yes, it would bother him."

Axel shrugged. "You don't seem convinced to me." Kairi chose to not say anything else for fear she might reveal more than she wanted to. He opened his mouth to say something else, but Kairi was saved by the return of the waiter. He placed a delicious looking dish on the table. Kairi inhaled the scent deeply.

"Ready to order?" he asked with a pad in his hand.

"Princess?" Axel questioned with an amused expression.

Kairi bit her lip. What could it really hurt to play along with Axel's game? He was right; it had been a while since she had any fun. She cleared her throat and answered, "Yes, dear. I trust you to order for me like you always do." She smiled happily, forcing the fact that she still had not heard from Sora in the back of her mind. Her sadness would be waiting for her when the evening was over.

Axel completed their order and turned his attention back to her. She watched as he placed his large hand over hers. Her eyes widened but before she could protest, he gave her hand a squeeze and pulled away.

"Axel?"

"You looked sad."

Kairi sighed, "I haven't heard from him all day."

"That's acceptable to you?"

"It doesn't matter what's acceptable to me…we don't live in a perfect world."

She couldn't read the expression on his face, but she could tell he was thinking deeply. "Kairi, what do you say we go to one more place after this?"

She hesitated, then nodded.


	9. Tension

Kairi should've known 'one more place' was a bad idea.

She was seated in the circular booth of a large bar with all the club vibes. Strobe lights and colored light streams filtered through the air. The entire place smelled of smoke and Kairi couldn't tell if it was from people smoking or the smoke machines that went off every fifteen minutes. The entire place was grungy, much like Axel's usual taste in clothing. She hadn't visited this side of Twilight Town since her college years; she could easily remember watching Riku flirt his way through the dancefloor while she and Sora floated into a world of their own. That was before psychology had stolen them both from her. Her heart ached.

"Do you want another drink?" Axel asked. He was seated next to her, holding his empty glass. He'd switched from wine to whiskey upon arrival.

Kairi stared at the remainder of the martini she had in front of her. She had to go to work tomorrow morning and drinking more was only going to make her feel sick. But the more she thought about the empty bed that awaited her, the more she wanted to drink.

Axel leaned toward her, placing his lips next to her earlobe. Kairi blushed as he whispered, "Stop thinking about him. Tonight it's just us."

Grabbing her glass, she scooted away from him and finished the gulp that was left. "I-uh think I will have another," she announced with a forced smile. Axel's expression was unreadable as he departed without another word. As soon as he was out of sight, Kairi clutched her hand to her chest and focused on her breathing. What was Axel doing to her?

"Kairi?"

She lifted her head and nearly shrieked at the man that stood before her. "V-Ven? What?" she stammered, feeling like she'd been caught. But caught doing what exactly?

The spitting image of Ventus rose a brow. "Ven? What are you talking about?" he questioned, "You're Kairi, right? With Axel?"

Kairi paled. "You're not Ventus?"

The blonde man shook his head, looking more perplexed. "Nah, I'm Roxas. Axel and I are best friends. He told us to meet you guys here," he explained with a frown, "He didn't tell you about us?"

"Who is us?"

A woman that reminded Kairi of herself stepped out from behind Roxas. She had short, raven hair and deep blue eyes that fell on Kairi immediately. "Whoa!" the woman exclaimed, "Axel wasn't kidding about the resemblance. I'm Xion, by the way."

Roxas looked from Kairi to Xion and then back again. He shrugged his shoulders. "You guys just have that face."

"Oh, ho. The party has arrived!" thundered Axel's voice. He slid into the seat next to Kairi and set the newly purchased drinks on the table. "I thought you guys weren't gonna make it."

Roxas slid in next to Axel and Xion sat on Kairi's right. "Of course we came! We haven't seen you in a long time. Where have you been?" Roxas demanded, "You never told us where you moved, you just disappeared!"

Kairi watched Axel curiously. He'd never mentioned anything about his life before he lived with her and Sora. Not that she'd ever asked. She took a sip of her fresh martini and listened as the pair of lookalikes assaulted Axel with questions.

"Do you know how worried we've been?" Roxas grumbled, "You could have called and said you were all right!"

Xion giggled, "Axel has never been good at communication."

"What's that supposed to mean?" the male in question asked with a smirk.

"Axel!" Roxas nearly shouted, looking completely furious.

"He's been living with me," Kairi found herself saying. Three pairs of eyes gazed at her incredulously. She blushed and quickly took another drink.

"Are you two-?"

Axel interrupted Xion's innocent question with a startled response. "Kairi! The little joke was meant to be between us and strangers, not people we know."

Kairi blushed harder. "I-I didn't mean to say it that way!"

"What Kairi means is that I'm crashing at her and her fiancé's place," Axel clarified, "Kairi is the fiancé of my friend, Sora."

Xion nodded. "Oh, I remember him. What a nice guy," she complimented before turning her attention to Roxas, "Since Axel has been thoroughly interrogated, mind getting us some drinks, Rox?"

The blonde man let out a breath, physically calming. Kairi was amazed at how easily he was soothed. "Sure thing," he agreed, placing a kiss on Xion's lips as he walked toward the bar.

"You two are the married friends!" Kairi suddenly exclaimed, "Axel was right, he does have friends!"

Axel eyed Kairi. "You okay, princess? Did I overindulge you?"

She shook her head. "No, no. It's just…everything makes sense now," she explained before turning to Xion, "Axel has been helping me plan my wedding with tips that he learned from yours."

Xion smiled. "Ah, I see. Glad he has been helpful to you. He can be quite a handful of trouble," she teased.

"Me? Trouble? Please! You're the one always threatening to run off," Axel accused with a smile. It was the first time Kairi could remember seeing him smile without airs. The kindness in his eyes surprised her and suddenly she felt she understood him. He was a gentle man hidden beneath wit and charm, and it was clear to her that Roxas and Xion had been two of the few privileged enough to know him fully.

"And why shouldn't I?" Xion questioned, "You promised to always bring me back."

Axel surrendered, "Fair point."

Kairi smiled to herself. She was learning so much about Axel. It was hard to believe she'd ever been suspicious of his character. He'd taken her out to get her mind off her failing engagement and he'd introduced her to his closest friends. Axel was wonderful. She happily studied his face as he took another drink of his whiskey. She didn't even bother to look away when his eyes met hers.

Roxas returned, handing Xion a red cocktail, before returning to his seat. "So, Kairi, tell us what Axel has been up to since he doesn't know how to communicate," Roxas slyly suggested.

Kairi peeled her eyes from Axel's face to answer Roxas. She was beginning to feel dizzy and she knew she'd had enough to drink. "Uh, let's see…he's lazy and has made a permanent dent in my couch," Kairi answered with a fake frown, "He helps himself to all our food, doesn't pay rent, and abducts me from my place of work whenever he likes!"

"Don't forget to mention about how I harass you," Axel loudly whispered with a wink.

She nodded fiercely. "Oh yes, Roxas! He harasses me all the time with nicknames," she added before laughing, "No, no. Well, he does do those things but he's been great company. Sora works all the time so without Axel around it'd just be me."

"Sora works all the time? What does he do?" Xion asked.

Kairi frowned, recalling his long hours at work and short hours at home. "He's a psychology professor at Twilight U," she answered quietly. Her mood was beginning to dip and she began to wonder how long Axel wanted to stay. Her empty bed was more appealing than talking about her strained relationship with Sora.

"Let's not talk about Sora," Axel suggested as though he'd read her mind. Kairi sent him a thank you with her eyes as he continued, "You boring, married couple still know how to dance?"

Xion smirked. "I do, I don't know about Roxas, though. He's been falling asleep at nine these days," she lamented, "I can hardly get him to do anything fun with me."

Kairi watched as Axel laughed. Roxas and Xion truly brought the best out of him.

"Roxas doesn't have fun with you anymore? Seems like he couldn't stop having fun with you when I was crashing with you guys," Axel snorted. Kairi changed her mind; Axel was as crude as always, if not more.

"Let's just go!" Roxas groaned, "I'd rather dance than listen to this." Kairi watched in amazement as he chugged the rest of his beer and slammed the bottle on the table. He was definitely not Ventus, who typically passed out after half a glass of wine.

* * *

After an hour or so of dancing and drinking intermittently, Xion and Roxas drifted away into the crowd. Kairi was sure it was a combination of the dancing hordes and the couple's desire to be alone that led them away. She sluggishly turned to inform Axel of their absence, but forgot the thought once his hands gripped her waist. Immediately, her entire body warmed as though small flames had licked across the surface of her skin. She looked up and found his daring eyes already on her.

"What are you staring at?" she asked, unable to look away.

He pressed her closer and answered, "You."

She gasped, fearing how handsome he looked to her at that moment. Confused, she tried to pull away from him but he held her steady against him as they continued to move in time with the music.

"Something the matter?"

Kairi blushed again for the millionth time. "I'm attracted to you!" she suddenly exclaimed. Realizing what she said, she jumped out of his arms and covered her mouth with her hands.

Axel continued watching her silently; his eyes made her heart buzz. The tension was too much for her; she turned and fled through the crowd.  _I just need some air, that's all. I'm just tipsy, I didn't mean it!_

She hurried up the stairs that led to the cobblestoned streets of Twilight Town. She took a deep breath as soon as she met the cool, night air and slumped against the side of the building. She was grateful to be alone on the street as she tried to calm the pounding of her heart.

Kairi attempted to turn her thoughts to Sora, her beloved fiancé, but she didn't stand a chance. Axel's head appeared as he climbed the club steps. At this rate, she was going to have a heart attack.

He closed the distance between them like a predator stalking its prey. She let out a gasp as he pinned her to the wall, gazing deeply into her eyes.

"Repeat what you said," he urged quietly.

She looked toward the ground and mumbled, "I'm attracted to you."

"Mhm…well, I'm attracted to you too, Kairi. What do you make of that?" Kairi froze. Had she heard him correctly? Axel was attracted to her? "Ah, tut, tut, tut, princess. I can hear the doubt in your mind louder than the music blasting downstairs."

She dared to meet his gaze and was taken aback by how concerned he looked. She had been expecting arrogance or vanity, not sympathy. "Stop looking at me like that," she whispered, "I don't need your pity."

"Trust me. Pity is the last thing on my mind."

He leaned closer to her. She held her breath as his face drifted toward the side of her neck. She closed her eyes to brace herself for whatever was coming next but instead she was struck by the sound of his whispering. The words he relayed deeply disturbed her, and replayed in her mind throughout the night. Instead of losing sleep over Sora, she laid awake buzzing with thoughts of Axel.

_"_ _If you were mine, you would never have to worry about how I felt. I'd tell you what I thought every chance I got, and believe me, it's all positive, princess."_


	10. The Aftermath

_"_ _Kairi, you're more beautiful than the sunset. Did you know that?"_

_I smiled, relishing in the attention Sora was giving me as we stood on Sunset Hill. This was my first time watching the sun set over Twilight Town and I never imagined it would be so romantic. The rosy hues that painted the sky were poetic; it was like being in a fairy tale. "Sora, thank you for bringing me here. It's wonderful."_

_Sora shook his head and took my hands in his. "No, Kairi, you're wonderful. I was stupid for neglecting you for so long. I'm never leaving without you again," he vowed with one of his cheesy grins. He gazed down at the charm bracelet on my arm and added, "You won't be getting another one this year." His hands began to caress up my arms, sending tingles across my skin._

_With one hand on the small of my back and the other gripping my chin, he pulled me to his lips. I sighed happily against the soft feeling. It had been so long; I'd missed him so much. I pressed my body against his, allowing my hands to reach up and play in his delightful, brown hair._

_"_ _Oh, Kairi, I love you so much," he hummed as his kisses began to deepen. I didn't have a chance to return his love vocally, but I tried to show him that I felt the same._

_He pulled away abruptly and my eyes fluttered open. Instead of seeing Sora's tanned, handsome face, I saw Axel._

_"_ _You're a great kisser, princess."_

_I screamed._

Kairi jolted up in her bed, awakened by the sound of her own terror. Before she had a moment to compose herself, Axel burst into the room wielding the broom.

"What? What's wrong?" he asked, panic written all over his face.

Just looking at his face made her want to scream all over again. Why had he been in her dream? Was it also impossible for her to enjoy her fiancé in her dreams? Kairi groaned and fell back against her pillows. "Nothing's wrong!" she groaned. The volume of her voice gave her a headache, which elicited another groan. Of course she had a hangover.

Not taking the hint, Axel traveled closer to her bedside and peered down at her. "You sure you're okay?"

She closed her eyes and held her head with her hand. "I'm fine, Axel. Just go," she breathed, "Actually, wait, what time is it?"

"Nearly seven." She groaned again. "Why don't you just call in?" he suggested.

She opened one eye to attempt to glare at him. "That would be irresponsible. I shouldn't have gotten so carried away last night."

Axel tapped his chin. "Hm, I don't know, Kairi. If we're labeling actions as irresponsible I'd start with not taking care of yourself when you're clearly suffering. Would be a shame if your condition worsened."

"Ugh, I can't argue with you right now!" she cried then winced.

"Call in."

"You pulled me away before I could-"

"Get someone else to do it."

"But I'm the-"

It was Axel's turn to groan. "What is your plan, Kairi? Work till you pass out so you don't have to think about what's really bothering you?"

Kairi winced from both his volume and meaning. She let her hand drop and opened both her eyes. "Is it so obvious?" she questioned in a small voice.

Axel dared to sit on the side of her bed. "Afraid so."

She sighed, letting her thoughts drift back to Sora. Despite the jarring twist at the end, she had enjoyed dreaming of his love. Kairi had never stopped missing his affection and touch, but the dream had stirred longing in her heart that she thought she'd quelled. She resented his absence; it was torture.

"Maybe waiting isn't good enough," she whispered.

"My thoughts exactly, princess."

Kairi slowly pushed her body into a sitting position. "What do you mean?"

"Take action, Kairi. Show him exactly what he's been missing," he replied with a look that made Kairi feel even more lightheaded. When had he developed the ability to make her feel like melting?

She hadn't forgotten what she said to him last night, nor had she forgotten all of the things he'd said to her. If it hadn't been for the look he was giving her now, Kairi would've thought their actions had been because of alcohol. She looked away, hoping he couldn't see how her cheeks were burning.

"Cat got your tongue?" Axel teased.

"No…I'm just feeling sick," she lied, "I think I will call in after all."

The silence that hung over them was heavy. Kairi had no doubt he knew why she was hiding her face. She could feel his desire to address what happened like it was choking her. What could she even say? She'd confessed she found him attractive and he'd confessed he felt the same. Any further examination of the subject was out of the question. She was engaged to Sora. She was in love with Sora. Axel wasn't more than a friend, right?

She was shaken out of her reverie by the loss of Axel's weight on her bed. Kairi watched as he waved a bare hand to her and quietly exited her room. Her heart sunk once he closed the door. Why did she feel like she'd done something wrong?

* * *

Kairi groaned and rolled onto her side. She'd called in and stayed in bed to nurse her hangover. She glanced at the clock on the table next to her bed; it was already 11:30 AM.

"I guess I should join the land of the living," she muttered as she reached for her phone, which was next to the clock. She pressed the button and was delighted to see she had a text message. Kairi unlocked her phone and frowned; the text was from Axel.

_Made you breakfast, princess. It's in the microwave._

Her frown was soon replaced with a smile. Axel was so thoughtful. Even after how she'd danced around the subject of last night, he was still looking out for her. Unlike her fiancé that she hadn't heard from in almost two days.

Kairi navigated to her text conversation with Sora and added another inquiry to her list of ten. Sora hadn't mentioned where he was going, but she hoped the reason he hadn't answered her was because it was somewhere without signal.

She slowly stepped out of bed, draped her purple robe around her, and walked toward the kitchen. She could already hear the volume of whatever Axel was watching from the hall. She quietly poked her head around the corner and spotted the redhead with his legs stretched out across the yellow cushions. His spiky head rested against the arm of the couch. He was once again dressed in his black tank and jeans.

"Axel?" she called as she entered the living room. He didn't move. She dared to tiptoe closer to him and discovered that he'd fallen asleep. She smiled and knelt beside his sleeping form. There was something enjoyable about watching the way his chest softly rose and fell with each breath. He was strangely serene; even the tattoos under his eyes looked sweeter as he dozed.

_I've got to know what his hair feels like_.

Kairi slowly extended her arm, careful not to let the sleeve of her robe drop onto his face. Gingerly, she touched a lock of red hair and was soothed by how soft it felt under her fingertips. She continued to stroke his mane, wondering to herself how men like Sora and Axel could have such naturally messy hair.

"I'm not a dog, princess."

She barely suppressed a giggle. "Funny, you act like one with the way you track dirt in my house and hover around me."

Axel eyed her steadily. "You don't seem to mind my attention. In fact, I dare say you enjoy it."

She frowned as Axel grinned. "I don't want to talk about that."

Axel freed the arm he had been sleeping on to pat her head. "You never want to talk about anything, do you? I'm beginning to think you don't see me as a friend. I'm hurt, Kairi." He feigned injury and dramatically clasped his hand against his forehead.

She decided to play along. "You're right, I don't see you that way," she deadpanned, "I actually want to take you up on your offer to leave because I didn't enjoy last night at all."

Axel lifted his hand so she could see his smirk. "Oh, I beg to differ, Kairi." He leaned toward the edge of the couch and grabbed her chin before she could escape him. "I  _know_ you enjoyed last night."

She felt her mind hazing as she sunk into his sultry gaze. "We shouldn't talk about this," she gulped as his fingers began to trace her jawline. The simple movement was hypnotic.

"Why not?" he mused.

"I'm engaged," she argued, fighting the urge to shiver. She couldn't give him any encouragement; she couldn't do that to Sora.

"That's not a permanent condition. In fact, engagement can be remedied quite easily."

She gasped, "What are you saying?"

Before he could explain himself, Kairi heard the lock on the front door shift. She shot across the room just as Sora strolled through the door. He set his bag on the floor and began loosening his tie. She couldn't help but notice he was glowing, as though he'd been on some kind of vacation.  _Yeah, a vacation from you_.

Kairi swallowed down her dark thoughts, choosing to focus on the fact he was here. "Sora!" she called as she approached him, "You never told me where you were…I was worried about you. I wanted to apologize for how we left things."

Sora beamed at her and her worries were soothed. He didn't hate her. He didn't want to call off their engagement. He still loved her.

"You don't have to apologize, Kai. I've been regretting what happened too," he confessed before pulling her into a tight hug. She sighed happily, leaning into his familiar form. The feeling was even better than her dreams. "I didn't know what to say, that's why I didn't answer your messages. I'm sorry for worrying you."

Axel coughed from the couch but Kairi chose to ignore his commentary. "That's all right, I'm just glad you're back," she replied.

Sora released her, taking a step back from her. "Actually, we need to talk, Kairi," he announced gravely, "It's serious."

Kairi's face fell.


	11. The Talk

"All right, Sora. I'm listening."

Sora had insisted that Axel leave the house for a few hours while they talked. Kairi was beside herself with worry. Sure, she had thought it might be a possibility that Sora would want to call off their engagement, but she always secretly hoped it would never come to this. She'd loved him since she was fourteen and had been dating him since she was sixteen; he was everything to her.

_"_ _Kairi, let's go to the secret place."_

_I eyed him curiously but lifted myself from the sand anyway. "Sure, Sora. But what's this about?"_

_He grinned, flashing all of his teeth. "You'll see!"_

_He held my hand in his gloved one and pulled me up the wooden planks and past the waterfall. I nearly struggled to keep up with him as we ducked down into the small cave tunnel that led to our childhood hiding spot._

_"_ _Sora, slow down!" I laughed as he began to run to the cave opening._

_"_ _Sorry, Kai. I'm just excited."_

_He pulled me to the back of the cave, next to the mysterious wooden door. Sora stood before a carving we'd done as children with a silly look on his face. Before I could ask him what this was about, I saw it with my own eyes. In between the drawings we'd done of each other's faces, Sora had added an arm holding a paopu fruit._

_"_ _Sora?" I turned to see his beaming, reddened face._

_"_ _Kairi, I-I wanted to tell you but I didn't know how so I thought-"_

_"_ _Oh, Sora. You lazy bum," I joked, "Give me a rock."_

_"_ _Uh, sure. But what for?"_

_I giggled, "So you can share the other half."_

She held onto the memory of the day Sora asked her out, wishing it was enough to soothe the pain that was to come. Sora and Kairi were seated at the oak, dinner table. Kairi had chosen to sit in the dining chair next to his, fearing this would be the last time she got to be close to him.

"While I was away, something happened," he began carefully.

Kairi choked down her nervous saliva. What had happened? Did he meet someone else? Was that the real reason he hadn't answered her messages?

"I learned that I was being considered for department head," Sora continued, "It's amazing, Kairi!"

Kairi nearly fell out of her chair. Sora was acting this serious because of a potential promotion? She let out a sigh of relief. He wasn't going to end their relationship, at least, not today.

"Sora, I'm so happy for you," she congratulated, "When will you know?"

Sora was absolutely jittery with happiness. He was bobbing his legs excitedly under the table. "In a month or so. Kairi, this is everything I've worked for!" he exclaimed, "My dream, no, our dream is about to come true."

She forced a smile. She remembered a time when their dream had simply been to be together forever. When had the dream changed and why hadn't she been informed? "I really am happy for you, Sora. I know how much this means to you." She placed her hand on his arm. "How can I support you?"

Sora grinned, placing his hand on top of hers. "Just keep doing what you always do," he answered, "You keep me grounded, Kairi."

A few months ago, those words would have been enough to assure her of Sora's love. Now, she needed more. She was tired of waiting. Axel was right; she had to show him what he'd been missing out on.

She leaned closer to him and placed a kiss on his unsuspecting lips. Sora returned her affection by squeezing her hand. But a simple hand squeeze wasn't going to make up for the time apart. Kairi grasped Sora's cheeks and deepened the kiss. She pulled away slowly, hoping to give him an opportunity to initiate the next kiss. Instead, he merely smiled at her. That wasn't enough.

"Sora, I want to get married," she declared, "I know I've been planning a ceremony, but maybe I've been going about it the wrong way. We could just elope or go to the courthouse-"

The look in Sora's eyes deflated her. She held her breath for the blow he was about to deliver. "Kairi, I wanted to talk to you about that too. I'm not going to be able to focus on anything else until I know if I've gotten the position," he explained.

"A month or so isn't that long, we can just plan ahead. Maybe we can celebrate your promotion and our wedding at the same time."

Sora shook his head. "I'm going to be even busier after I'm promoted, Kairi. I'll have more responsibilities and expectations on my shoulders."

Nausea filled Kairi's stomach, drying her throat and mouth. "What are you saying?"

"We're going to have to postpone getting married until I'm settled."

Kairi was speechless. They didn't even have a date to postpone the wedding from. What was Sora really saying? Didn't he want to marry her anymore? He reached out to touch her, but she quickly pulled away.

"Kairi…"

"No!" She looked toward the couch, wishing Axel was still there. He would've supported her. "No…I don't understand, Sora. Why does marrying me prevent you from fulfilling your duties? At this rate, we'll never marry until you retire and that isn't good enough for me."

Sora lowered himself to the floor and grasped the hands that were balled in her lap. "Kai, I know I've asked for a lot of patience from you, but I just need a little more. You know that I care about you and I want to share my life with you, but with everything that's going on it'll be impossible for me to go through with this," he whispered carefully. Kairi felt her shoulders sag. This was a losing battle. She couldn't make Sora marry her. They were at an unending standstill.

"Sora, I love you. Do you love me?"

"I do, Kairi. More than you know."

"Then how can you live this way?" she demanded. Tears were pooling in her eyes. "I miss you so much. It's torture to never have you home with me!"

"I know but it's not forever. One day we will be happily married. It just might be a few more years that's all." He dared to smile and that sent Kairi over the edge.

"No!" she cried, jumping from her seat. "I want to have children, Sora! I'm not getting any younger. A few more years is too long."

Sora frowned. "I know, I know. But there's nothing else I can do."

"Yes, there is. You can just marry me. We won't have a ceremony or a honeymoon. We can just sign a paper and be wed. It won't take away from your work, I promise," Kairi begged, "Please, if you love me and want me, please."

He hesitated. She could tell her desperation was making him uncomfortable. "Maybe we should talk about this again later," he suggested as he stood straight, "Right now, both of us aren't level-headed."

She hugged herself. "I am level-headed. I know what I want. Do you, Sora?" she snapped. He was silent. "I-I need some air. I'm going to take a walk. Will you be home tonight?"

Sora winced. "I promised to help Naminé with a case tonight…"

"You've been gone for days and as soon as you get back you already have other people to see?"

It was Sora's turn to snap. "I'm here now, aren't I?"

Kairi faltered. When had their relationship become like this? They never snapped at each other. Sora and Kairi had always been pleasant, fair, and patient. "You're right, I'm sorry!" she cried before throwing herself into his arms. He held her securely as she cried into his chest. "I won't go anywhere. I'll stay with you for as long as you're here."

Sora kissed the top of her red hair. "I'm sorry too. I know this is hard for you," he cooed, "But I promise, it'll happen."

She nodded and grasped him tighter. If only she never had to let him go.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is probably as good a time as any to state that Sora and Kairi are my OTP. Sometimes I just enjoy writing things I'd never want to see in canon. So, if you're also someone who enjoys a little emotional pain, keep reading! I'd love to hear what you think as well :)


	12. Denial

"I'm home!"

Axel didn't bother to turn his head to greet Kairi. Instead, he merely lifted a hand and waved to her. He barely managed to hide his stunned expression when she slumped onto the couch next to him.

"What are you watching that is so interesting?" she asked him. An obvious comment about his cold shoulder.

"Nothing," was his curt response.

"You're quiet today."

"Hmph."

The truth was Axel was furious and he was struggling to maintain his composure. Ever since he'd returned home and found Kairi, alone, curled on the couch with a box of tissues, he'd felt nothing but anger toward them both. He was angry with Sora for neglecting Kairi and not noticing how she was falling apart. He was angry with Kairi for not standing up for herself and continually putting up with Sora's bullshit. Was the woman dense? Sora was clearly stringing her along.

"Is everything all right?" Kairi asked. He could feel her staring at him.

He took in a breath and then turned to face her with the most sarcastic look he could conjure. "Well of course it is, princess. Your prince has returned and has resumed ignoring you. Everything is back to normal, right?" he spat.

Kairi recoiled. For a moment, he regretted how cruel he'd been, but the moment passed. Kairi could use a dose of reality.

"I don't understand. I thought you'd be happy for me. Sora isn't leaving."

He rolled his eyes. "Kairi, you're a smart woman. Surely, you see you're wasting your time, don't you? If the man wanted to marry you, he would've done it already."

"I don't remember asking for your opinion on my relationship with Sora."

He smirked. He'd made her angry now. Funny how she could find her anger with him easily, but worship Sora even as he broke her heart into pieces. "Call it a side effect of living here so long," Axel offered.

"Well you won't be living here much longer if you keep sharing it."

"Oh, ho! Is that a threat or a promise?"

Kairi scoffed and crossed her arms. "You're insufferable, you know that?"

"You find it  _attractive_ , though," Axel teased. She grumbled and turned away. "Did I hit a sore spot?"

"I was drunk, okay? Drunk and desperate," she defended, "I love Sora. I'm devoted to him." Now her confession had been drunk and desperate? When was she going to admit what she was feeling? Axel bit back his frustration; it wouldn't help to lash out, no matter how satisfying it would be. He didn't want to cripple her like Sora clearly had.

"Hey now, no one was questioning your devotion to Sora. It's painfully obvious how he has you wrapped around his little finger. I was questioning your  _sanity_  for being so devoted to a man that doesn't return it."

"I don't have to listen to this!" she huffed. Kairi hurried away from the couch and to the kitchen. Axel wasn't going to let her off that easy, though. She needed to listen to reason.

He stomped after her, jumping in front of the refrigerator door before she could open it.

"Axel, move!"

He wagged his index finger in her face. "No, no. It's intervention time, princess. Got it memorized?"

Her arms were crossed again. She shifted her weight onto one hip and glared at him. Axel loved the fire burning in her indigo eyes. She looked like an angry pixie standing before him with her small, slender features. Features he'd dreamt of every night since he pinned her to that wall.

"Are you going to oogle me or talk?" she muttered.

His eyes widened. "Wow, see, you need to save some of that sass for your main squeeze," Axel advised, not bothering to hide how delighted he was with her temper. "I'll save my oogling for later, you're right, this is serious. Kairi, what do you want in life?"

She looked caught off guard by his question. "There's no simple answer to that, Axel."

He shrugged. "I have time."

"Well, if you really want to know…" she hesitated, "Don't laugh!"

"Wouldn't dream of it."

"I always imagined having a family and growing old with someone I loved."

"Can you get any more cliché?" he chuckled.

Kairi's cheeks reddened. "What? Is that so wrong?"

Axel relented. "Sorry, sorry. Okay, so you want a family and to grow old with someone you love. Let's examine your life, Kairi. Where are you right now?"

She scoffed, "I'm engaged to the man I love."

"Hmm, and that family you wanted?"

"It's not in the immediate future if that's what you mean."

Axel tapped his chin. "Do you want to know what I find interesting, Kairi?" When she didn't respond, he continued anyway. "I think it's interesting you said you wanted to grow old with someone you loved, not someone who loved you. It's almost like your dream includes being in a one-sided relationship."

Her eyes widened. "What? No! That's not what I meant!"

"No?" he questioned, "Then why is that where you are?"

"Sora loves me!"

Axel placed his hand on his forehead. This woman was hopeless. "Who are you trying to convince me or you?"

Kairi placed her hand on her heart. "You just don't understand. Sora and I have something special, something worth fighting for. Now, move out of the way. I need to start making dinner."

Axel reluctantly stepped to the side and let her dig through the fridge. He watched as she began pulling out vegetables and setting them on the counter. She was too beautiful to waste away waiting for Sora to return her affection. If she couldn't have the life partner and the family she wanted, Kairi should at least be enjoying herself.

"Are you happy, Kairi?" The tenderness in his voice even surprised him.

She paused, half of her body still leaning into the fridge. She seemed to contemplate his question before answering, "I will be."

Axel frowned, processing the meaning of her words. She was right; she  _would_  be happy and he would make sure of it.


	13. Surprise Visit

"Hey, I'm here for Sora Yuuki. Can I go up, dollface?"

Axel leaned against the counter of the lobby, staring down at the good-looking, college-aged secretary. She was dressed in an orange, Twilight U polo and a pair of khaki pants. "Do you have an appointment?" she asked between smacks of her gum.

"Don't need one. He'll know who I am," Axel insisted coolly, "I've been here before, you know." He leaned closer to her and added, "And can I add that orange is your color." He winked.

She raised a brow, but instead of questioning him further she sighed and pointed to the elevator. "Fifth floor with all the other faculty. Though, I think he's in a meeting."

He saluted her with two fingers before lumbering off to the elevator. The place was just as he remembered it. Same, decaying brown furniture. Same fluorescent ceiling lights with the same dead bugs inside them. The walls even had the same coat of chipped, beige paint. No one had improved or worsened the condition of the psychology building, which was intriguing given all the budget increases over the years.

Once he reached the fifth floor, he ambled over to where Sora's office had been before. He was surprised to see two strangers instead of the familiar, sunny brunette. "Hmm, I guess he moved," he muttered.

"Looking for someone?"

Axel turned and spotted Riku walking toward him. He always found it interesting that Riku could get away with wearing sleeveless shirts in the office. The man's muscles seemed to grow every time he saw him. "Yo!" Axel greeted with a half wave, "I'm looking for your BFF. Seen him anywhere?"

Riku ignored Axel's flamboyance and pointed to the open door at the end of the hall. "He changed offices a while back," he explained in his usual, brooding tone, "He should be in there with Naminé."

Axel quirked a brow. "Who is Naminé?"

Riku flipped a piece of his long, silver hair. "You never met her? She's an adjunct, teaches an art therapy class every semester in-between private practice."

"Ah. And she's close to Sora?"

Riku nodded. "Yes, she's often found wherever he is. Go see for yourself."

"I think I will."

"Give Kairi my regards," Riku added with a small smile.

"Sure thing. You should stop by sometime. She gets lonely."

Riku seemed to falter. Had Axel struck a chord? He'd known that Sora, Riku, and Kairi had all come from Destiny Islands, but he'd never been sure about how close Riku and Kairi were. "I'm sure she does," Riku answered, "I'll stop by sometime. Tell her to expect me. See you around."

Axel slowly walked down the rest of the hall, tuning his ears to listen to the sounds coming from Sora's office. There was something fishy about him spending all his time with another woman, but he couldn't say anything until he had proof. Otherwise, Kairi would just ignore him like she usually did when it came to her faultless fiancé.

_"_ _Sora, it would mean so much to me if you could."_

_"_ _Of course, I'd do anything for you, Naminé."_

Axel hurried into the doorway and took in the scene before him. Sora's office held a mahogany desk, a comfortable-looking, green couch, several lamps, a large window overlooking the campus, and tons of pictures that littered the walls and free spaces of his desk.

"Sora!" he greeted, stepping into the room and surprising the blonde woman on the couch. "Long time no see," he joked as he plopped down into the chair facing Sora's desk.

Sora grinned. "Axel! What brings you here? You never visit me at the office. You aren't looking for a job here again, are you? You know none of us can hire you," he stated in a matter of fact tone.

Axel shook his head. "Nah, this place would get too boring for me." He turned his head to the couch, watching as the blonde woman he assumed to be Naminé, gathered her belongings. She was extremely fair skinned and petite. Her long, blonde hair nearly reached the middle of her back and curled at the ends. She was quite attractive; he almost couldn't blame Sora if he liked her. Almost.

"And who is this little bird?" Axel questioned, feigning ignorance.

"My name is Naminé," she answered, harsher than Axel had expected. Her eyes reminded him of Kairi's when he'd provoked her too much.

He smirked. "Nice to meet you. I'm Axel, a friend of Sora and his fiancé, Kairi."

Her expression hardened at the mention of Kairi. Perhaps he had reason to be suspicious after all. "It's nice to meet you too. I'll come back later, Sora," she announced, finally gathering the last of her color pencils. She waved and quietly departed the room.

"Hmm, she's pretty," Axel commented lightly, watching Sora's face for any indication that he felt the same.

"Are you interested?" Sora asked, not giving Axel anything to feed off of.

Axel shrugged. "Is she single?" His emerald eyes shifted between the pictures lining the room. They all seemed to be from his childhood and college days. Only two had Kairi in them. The first was a picture of herself, Sora, and Riku standing on a beach. The second was of Sora and Kairi on the train; they looked happier than he'd ever seen them in real life.

"Uh, yes," Sora answered, "I don't know how the two of you would get along, though."

"Aren't friends supposed to hook each other up?"

"I mean, I can talk to her if you want," Sora offered with a small smile. His offer didn't seem completely genuine to Axel, but he decided not to press the issue. He had come here to talk about someone else.

"I'll let you know. Speaking of little ladies, how is everything with yours?"

Sora tilted his head to the side. "Are you talking about Kairi?" Axel wanted to smack him. Of course he was talking about Kairi! "She's fine. Weren't you just with her this morning?"

Axel bit back his anger. He wasn't going to be effective if he lost his cool. "No, Sora. I meant your relationship. I couldn't help but notice she stopped obsessively planning your wedding."

"Oh, were you worried?" Sora asked, nonchalant as ever, "Everything between us is fine. We're just going to postpone it longer." Sora eyed the doorway before leaning closer to Axel and whispering, "You see, I might be made department head."

"What does that have to do with marrying Kairi?" If his promotion was the reason Sora was stalling, he might just beat the sense back into him.

"Isn't it obvious? I have to get everything settled before I'll have time to devote to marrying Kairi. She understands. We'll just push it back some."

Axel stood, unable to contain the energy that wanted to flood out of him. How Kairi had fallen for Sora in the first place was a mystery to him. Was he always this dense?

"Sora, humor me, why did you propose to Kairi?" he asked as he began pacing the length of Sora's office.

Sora blinked. "Well, I loved her. I couldn't imagine life without her."

"Oh? You  _loved_  her?"

He hesitated. "I mean, I love her."

Axel stopped pacing. "Do you love her, Sora? Think hard." He tapped his temple. "Think really hard."

"What are you talking about? Kairi's important to me!" Sora looked flustered. Axel could tell he was beginning to get under his skin.

"Is importance the same as being in love with someone, Sora? I thought you were smarter than that. How disappointing."

"You don't know the first thing about Kairi and me."

Axel slammed his hands onto Sora's desk. "That's where your wrong!" he exclaimed. He lowered his voice and looked Sora straight in his cerulean eyes. "I know several things about you and your fair lady. I know you hardly ever speak to her when you are home. I know how she cries about you, wishing you'd spend more time with her. I know how she thinks you don't find her attractive anymore. I know how hurt she is by this new postponement. You're the one who doesn't know anything."

Sora fell silent. Axel hoped he was taking to heart what he'd said about Kairi's condition. If the idiot actually loved her, surely, he would change his tune with a little encouragement.

"Axel," Sora began, "You are my friend, but I can't have you live with us if you're going to act this way."

That was the last thing Axel expected him to say. He had been expecting something like, 'Oh goodness, Axel, you sure are right. I better get home and love Kairi forever', or even, 'Has she really been crying? Oh man, I better comfort her!' He never thought Sora would threaten to throw him out. It seemed out of character for him to be so stern and emotionally closed.

He backed away from Sora's desk and let his hands fall to his sides. When he replied, he struggled to hide the disgust in his voice. "All right, Sora. You just keep doing whatever you want. I won't bring it up again."

"Thank you, Axel. Tell Kairi I'll be home late tonight."

He nodded. "Will do." Axel trudged out of his office with clenched fists. There were two things that bothered him. First and foremost was Sora's dismissive attitude toward Kairi. The second was the fact that he'd noticed Sora had a picture of himself and Naminé right within his line of sight on the desk.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know Sora is OOC here, but I promise there is a reason and that it will be thoroughly explained later. Until then, stay tuned.


	14. Clock Tower Confessions

"Why did you want to come here, Axel?"

Axel and Kairi were seated at the top of the Twilight Town clock tower watching the sunset. It was a place that had always provided Axel some solace. He deeply inhaled the humid air, letting it sink into his lungs. He was still unsettled by the conversation he'd had with Sora. He couldn't stop thinking about the way Sora completely dismissed his concerns about Kairi. Was he that dense or did he just not care about her feelings?

"Axel, um, hello?"

He pulled himself from his thoughts, turning to look at Kairi's face. She was even more radiant in the deep colors of the sunset. Her indigo eyes were perfectly illuminated by the sun's rays, looking closer to amethysts than irises. Axel sighed; he had it bad. He'd felt it since he'd helped her clean the broken lamp, and now he was comparing her eyes to priceless jewels. Yikes. It frustrated him to no end that Sora, her  _fiancé_ , seemed to have her around 'just 'cause'.

"Need something?" Axel asked, attempting to hide his sour mood.

"Is this about our disagreement?" she replied, tucking a red strand of hair behind her ear, "Because if it is, I'm sorry."

He shook his head. "No, no, don't you start apologizing to me too. You do that enough with Sora."

Kairi put her hand on his. He couldn't hide his surprise as he looked from their hands to her face. She was smiling at him. "It isn't like that, Axel. I just don't want us to fight over something we'll never agree on. You're my friend and I know you only said those things because you care about me," she explained with a squeeze to his hand.

"How can you be so cheery?" Axel blurted out, "How can you smile like that all the time? You don't make any sense."

She giggled. Her laughter was a delight to his ears. "Axel, if I spent all my time dwelling on what is wrong, I'd never be able to enjoy what is right," she answered with a happy sigh. She stared out to the horizon looking like a true princess.

"Interesting."

"Interesting? That's all you have to say? That's unlike you."

Her hand was still on his, distracting him from coming up with anything wittier. "I have off days too, Kairi."

"I suppose you do," she chuckled. She began to lift her hand, but Axel grabbed it and held it. "Axel, what-"

"Do me a favor, don't move away."

She didn't pull her hand away, but her eyes continued to rest on him. "Is something wrong?"

"I think that's my line, princess."

"Maybe. But you're worrying me. Did something happen?"

Axel simply shrugged. "If it did, I don't want to talk about it."

"Who's stealing lines now?"

He smirked. "I guess we have rubbed off on each other. Though, I always hoped we'd rub off on each other in a different way."

Kairi frowned. "Axel, be serious!"

"All right, all right!" Her frown dropped, but she still looked bothered. He could tell she wanted to say something so he gave her a light nudge. "Spit it out," he demanded with a chuckle.

"Axel, I realized that I don't know much about you. I consider you a good friend, but I've never bothered to ask you about yourself."

"Oh, you want to know more about me, princess? Well, ask away. I'm an open book!" he offered. He released her hand and laid back with his arms behind his head. He needed a break from the feel of Kairi's supple skin; instead of oogling her, he chose to stare into the sky.

"Okay, well, where are you from?"

"Easy, Radiant Garden."

"What? Me too!"

Axel turned his head and wagged his finger. "No, you're not! You're from Destiny Islands like that lover boy of yours," he corrected.

She shook her head with a sly smile. "Actually, I'm not. It's true that I grew up there, but I was born in Radiant Garden. When my grandmother died, I moved to live with my relatives on the islands," she clarified, "So, looks like we're from the same place. How'd you end up in Twilight Town?"

"Same way you did. College."

"How vague."

"What? You want to hear my sob story? How I was forced to leave Radiant Garden by a backstabbing best friend and leech off buddies in Twilight Town?" Axel grumbled. He'd slipped into his memories, forgetting himself in the process. He'd never forget the look in his eyes when…

Kairi brought him back by stroking pieces of his hair; at some point, she'd lowered herself next to him. He smiled sadly. "Trying to soothe me?" She merely nodded and continued. He didn't bother to stop her.

"Tell me what happened," she requested.

"It's a long story."

"I have time."

He groaned, "Ugh, I've given you too much of my attitude!" Kairi giggled but never stopped touching him. He hated how soothing she could be; she was like a light chasing away his darkness. "All right, in Radiant Garden I had a best friend called Isa. We were inseparable growing up. He was brilliant, most intelligent guy I've ever known, and with my muscle and good looks we were quite the pair." He paused for a laugh but continued when he didn't get one. "We went to college together at Twilight U because Isa insisted we should broaden our horizons. He'd always had his eye on the research lab at the castle and most of the researchers there had gone to Twilight U."

"Is he the reason you became a researcher?"

Axel smirked. "Well, I couldn't leave him alone with all the stuffy coats, could I?"

"I guess not."

"We both ended up getting offered positions in the lab. We moved in and shared a room. I thought we'd always be together, but I didn't realize Isa had meant to shake me off from the beginning. When Xehanort was choosing who would be on the tenure-track…let's just say, Isa stole my work and I was given the red slip."

"What? That's not fair!"

"Life's not fair, Kairi. It's why I can't get another position. Xehanort blacklisted me. He's the reason I go by Axel. You see…my name's actually Lea, but that identity died with Isa's betrayal."

He could see the gears turning in her head. He mentally counted down to when she would begin apologizing.  _4, 3, 2…_

"Axel, I'm so sorry. I had no idea and I made all those jokes about your employment…oh, I feel just awful!" She'd jerked up and away from him. He frowned, already missing her gentle touches. He sat up and put an arm around her. She looked at him and he could see the mistiness of regret in her eyes.

"Kairi! Cheer up! We tease and poke at each other. It's all in good fun," he assured her with a little shake to her shoulders.

She shook her head. "No, Axel. I really didn't think much of you when you moved in. I was so quick to judge you-oh, I'm so sorry!" She leaned further into him, burying her head into his chest. The feeling warmed the pit of Axel's stomach. What was Kairi doing to him?

"No harm, no foul," he found himself saying as he rubbed her back, "I judged you too. Thought you were some happy, careless girl with no real problems. Though, to be fair, you never elaborated on your problems. I've had to guess them all."

Kairi blanched. "You're right. I'm sorry about that too."

"Kairi, come on-"

She stopped him with her hand. "No, listen to me, Axel. I want to be open with you. I'm not sure I would've ever thought more about my relationship with Sora if it wasn't for you. Sora and I…it seems like we drift further apart every year. He values his work and his friends more than he does me when it used to be the opposite." Kairi paused, clenching a fist before continuing. "He used to do anything he could to come home early. We used to spend our weekends exploring Twilight Town together or taking trips back to the islands. We stopped doing that years ago. I hate to admit this, but I'm losing him."

Axel frowned. He'd gathered as much from the interactions he'd witnessed. Sora had mentioned he had someone special when Axel met him. At the time, it was obvious how much the brunette cared for his lucky lady. Now, it seemed like he was a completely different person.

"So, what are you going to do, Kairi?" He regretted asking the question as soon as it'd left his lips.

"Sora wouldn't want me to give up on us. I'm going to stay until it ends."

How Axel wished she'd said something else. Maybe Kairi thought he was kidding when he mentioned that engagement was easily remedied, but he hadn't been. This was a losing battle. Granted, he wasn't even a proper combatant.

"Now we both know better," was all he could say.

She lifted her head. "Yes, you're right. We both know better now." She smiled so sweetly and honestly that it was hard for him to look at her. The sugary personality that used to turn him off had become alluring and sensual. She'd bewitched him without trying. "So…I shouldn't call you Lea?"

"Please don't."

Kairi giggled then checked the time on her phone. "We should get going. Sora will be hungry when he gets home."

He forced himself to release her. She happily stood and straightened her outfit as though nothing was wrong. And perhaps nothing was wrong. At least, not with her.

"Coming, Axel?"

"Yeah." He stood and followed her to the stairs.  _I'm going to have to get away from her before I do something she'll regret._


	15. Good News?

Kairi sneezed. Groaning, she lowered herself back onto the couch cushions. It was rare that she got sick, but when she did she was incapacitated for a few days. She regretted not taking supplements the moment Pence started coughing while fixing her computer.

She would be less miserable if Axel was home. He'd announced in the morning he had some places to be and offered to bring home groceries or anything else she needed. She'd given him a list and thanked him for his kindness.

Her attention lazily drifted to the program she'd stumbled upon. It wasn't often she got to watch television (at least not since Axel moved in), but when she did, she enjoyed cheesy, romance movies. The one she was watching was about a woman stuck between two men vying for her love. Kairi hated how much she related to the character, but watching the film was also mildly comforting. It showed her she wasn't out of her mind.

A considerable amount of time had passed since her and Axel's 'date', but she'd never stopped thinking about her confession to him. It'd only become truer as she got to know more about the redhead. Yes, he was rough around the edges, but she'd grown to like that about him. Perhaps too much.

The front door opened and slammed shut. She didn't have the strength to lift herself again.

"Axel?" she called.

"No, it's me, Kai!"

She checked the time on her phone. It was nearly three in the afternoon. Sora was never home that early.

"Sora, what are you doing here? Is everything all right?"

Sora came around and knelt beside her. "Kairi, everything is better than ever," he began with a smile, "I've just learned that I got the promotion. I'm going to be department head!"

Kairi managed a smile. "Sora, that's wonderful news. I'm so happy for you!" She reached out to hug him, but he evaded her grasp and simply gave her hand a squeeze.

"I don't want to get sick," he explained, "I've got a lot to prepare now."

She bit back the hurt of his rejection and asked, "What are you doing home then? It's unlike you."

He grinned. "I just couldn't wait to tell you the news and I wanted to tell you in person." Kairi's heart softened. It was sweet of him to want her to be the first to know. "I know things haven't been easy, but I was thinking once all the paperwork is completed that we could go somewhere to celebrate. You know, once you're better."

She could've died from happiness. Sora wanted to go somewhere with her? The past few years they'd only managed to go out once for their anniversary and birthdays, and Sora had always seemed strained during the few hours they'd spent together. "That would be wonderful, Sora."

"I thought you might think so. How are you feeling, anyway?"

"I still have a small fever. I hate having to take this time off of work."

Sora gently patted her messy head. "Well, it's not like you do much there, Kairi. I'm sure you aren't missing anything. Just focus on getting better."

Kairi furrowed her brow. "What do you mean I don't do much? I'm the head of HR. There's plenty for me to do!" she exclaimed, hurting her head with the volume of her voice.

"I didn't mean it that way, Kai. I just meant you don't have to work as much as I do." She didn't like that comment any better. "Worrying about work will just prolong your sickness and I don't like to see you this way."

She nodded. "Okay, I promise I won't worry. I'll look forward to our date instead."

"I have to go to Radiant Garden tomorrow so they put me on a gummi ship tonight," Sora explained, "I should be back in a week. They want me to meet the faculty over there. Networking stuff. That's actually another reason I came home. I gotta pack. If you weren't sick, I would've asked you to go with me."

She hid her frown. Now her sickness was preventing her from going on a trip with Sora? She hated this! She sighed and nodded. "Will you message me when you get there? Are you going to be by yourself?"

"Of course I will. And well, yeah, Riku can't go with me. He's got other plans," Sora pouted, "It's going to be so boring by myself."

"There isn't someone else that can go?"

He hesitated, rubbing the back of his neck with his free hand. "Ah, well, there is, but I wasn't sure if you'd be comfortable with it…"

"Why wouldn't I? You shouldn't have to go by yourself because I'm sick."

"It's Naminé. She said she could do me the favor."

Kairi hesitated before answering. Why would Sora think she wouldn't be comfortable if he traveled with Naminé? She was a friend from his department. It only made sense that she would be an option. She smiled. Was Sora worried that she would question him?

"Well, take her up on her offer," Kairi encouraged, "You said she's good company. I'm sure the two of you will make the most of it even though it's a work trip."

Sora looked relieved. "You know I'd prefer if it was you, but you're right. We will make the best of it. Thank you, Kairi. You're the best." He patted her head again and then stood to his full height. "I should start packing."

The door opened and shut again. Sora walked away from the couch and went to greet Axel.

"Axel, guess what!" Sora cried happily.

"Hm?"

Kairi could perfectly picture his unimpressed expression. She rolled her eyes as she listened to the two men talk about Sora's promotion. It was obvious by the tone of Sora's voice that Axel wasn't giving him the congratulations and excitement he felt he deserved.

"Well, I have news too, Sora. Check this out," Axel replied, "I've been hired."

"Whoa! That's great, Axel. I suppose you'll be on your way out then, huh?" Sora commented. She could hear them high fiving and patting each other's backs.

"Yeah, sorry to disappoint. I'm afraid I won't be a permanent resident."

Kairi felt her heart sinking. She knew she should be happy for him. Somehow, he'd managed to find a position even though he was blacklisted. It was a miracle. A miracle she couldn't enjoy.

The conversation died down between Sora and Axel. She heard Sora go into their bedroom to begin his packing. Axel, however, had sneaked over to the couch and startled her when he ran the back of his hand across her the length of her arm.

"You knew I was here, why did you jump?" he teased. She looked up to his smirking face. He was seated on the arm rest where her head was, looking down on her with a certain expression. She didn't dare think it was loving.

"I guess I'm still not used to you," Kairi answered, her voice soft and gravely from her aching throat. Talking to Sora had taken the energy out of her.

Axel frowned. "Do you need some medicine? I put the groceries on the table," he offered with another caress of her bare arm. Unable to control herself, she shuddered from his touch. He quirked a brow and placed his palm on her forehead. "You're so hot."

"Really? Can you get me the thermometer?"

He chuckled, "I wasn't talking about your temperature, but sure. I guess we should check that too."

Kairi blushed. "A-Axel!" she nearly coughed, "Stop playing around. I'm sick. I can't even fight back."

Axel glanced toward the hall before lowering his face to her forehead. "I'm not playing around," he whispered low enough for only her to hear. "I mean it." He lightly brushed his lips against her clammy forehead, spiking her temperature. He placed his finger to his mouth as he pulled away.

Kairi brought her hands to her mouth to suppress anything she might say. Why she preferred to hide his actions instead of alert Sora to what he had done confused her, but she didn't have time to question her actions. She also didn't have the mind to do it. Her head was drowning in sickness and hormones.

"I'll bring you the thermometer," he announced with what looked like an amused expression. She could barely muster a 'thank you' before he left to go get what she needed. She feared she wouldn't get an accurate read now. Her entire body was heated and it wasn't because of her fever.

He returned swiftly, plopping the thermometer in her mouth for her. She watched him as he studied the numbers on the device's digital reader. It beeped twice and he plucked it from her with a frown. "Ninety-nine degrees. Guess I shouldn't be messing around with you," he concluded as he tucked the thermometer back into its case.

She frowned. "No, I guess not…I might get you sick."

"I could care less about that, princess. I don't want to make you feel worse," he clarified with a cluck of his tongue, "I'm not heartless, you know. You're not in quarantine." She thought back to Sora's rejection of her hug and felt the sting even stronger. Had Sora been heartless? Was that even possible for someone as kind as him? "So, how about I pull my own weight for once and put away the groceries. Then, I can make you some tea and I can delight you with the story of how yours truly got his life together."

The pain in her chest grew. Axel was leaving. Soon, it'd just be her and Sora again. Instead of coming home and having someone to talk to, she'd be talking to herself. Instead of laughing and teasing Axel, all she would have to laugh at was the television.

Axel ran his fingers across her forehead. "You okay down there? Maybe I should let you sleep instead."

She shook her head. "No, I'm all right. Please tell me everything."

He raised both eyebrows. An easy indication that he wasn't convinced she was telling the truth. "Whatever you say." He silently left her side.

She frowned into the ceiling. What was she going to do without him?


	16. Something Strange

"I don't know, Axel. I don't think that place had enough counter space."

"Kairi, puh-lease. I think that medicine is messing with your brain. That place had a whole island countertop. How much space do you think I need?" he countered with an exasperated sigh, "You didn't like a single place we visited."

She shrugged against the leather of his passenger seat. Kairi had pleaded with Axel to take her apartment shopping that Saturday. His defense had been that she was still sick, but once she had proved she didn't have a fever and had taken several pills for her symptoms he reluctantly agreed. It'd been a few days since Sora left to Radiant Garden and she was a little stir crazy. Kairi also wanted to spend time with Axel before he left her. She was happy to hear that his new job was in Twilight Town, but she knew things would be different between them once he moved out.

"I just wasn't impressed," she concluded stubbornly.

Axel pulled to the curb in front of the townhouse and put his car in park. He turned the engine off and paused. "You know, if I didn't know any better, I'd think you were anxious about me moving out."

She feigned surprise. "What? No way. I'm happy for you!" Axel glowered at her. "I really am! Stop looking at me like that."

"You think I can't tell when you're lying by now?"

Kairi gulped and unbuckled her seatbelt. "Uh, you know, I think-" Her eyes drifted to her front door and she was surprised to see Riku standing in front of it with his hand raised. "Riku?" She quickly got out of Axel's car and hurried to her silver-haired friend. It'd been so long since he'd visited; she couldn't hide her happiness as she rushed to him.

"Riku!" She was as giddy as a school girl. He turned and scooped her into his strong arms.

"Kairi, hey!" he laughed, giving her one more squeeze. "I thought you weren't home. I was going to come back later."

She shook her head and began unlocking the door. "No, Axel and I were just looking at apartments. We're home now. Please come in," she explained as she pushed the door open. She spotted a bouquet of flowers resting on the patio chair. She smiled. "Are those for me?"

Riku nodded and retrieved them. "Didn't think I'd come empty handed, did you? It's tradition."

Kairi gratefully accepted them and hurried to the kitchen to get a vase of water. Riku had always brought her flowers when he visited, even when they were children on Destiny Islands. Though, then they'd been closer weeds, and Sora would fight him to pluck the biggest ones. "It's been a long time. I thought you'd forgotten about me and the flowers," she concluded as she completed her task. The flowers were a beautiful mixture of yellow, pink, and orange blooms.

"I see you took my advice," Axel commented with a smirk as he closed the door, "I was beginning to think you weren't coming."

Kairi set the flowers on the dining table. "What do you mean?"

Riku raised a silver brow. "Axel didn't tell you? He came by a while ago looking for Sora. We ran into each other and he told me you could use some company," he elaborated, "Sorry it took me so long to get here. It's been rough. I'm sure Sora has told you."

"It's okay, I understand. Plus, we got to talk a little at the department party…you know when Sora wasn't hounding you about that survey stuff," Kairi giggled, "But I really am happy you came by." She then turned her attention to Axel and glared at the redhead. "And why didn't you tell me you went to visit Sora?"

Axel dismissed her with his hand. "Didn't think I had to report all my comings and goings to you, princess."

"Mhm, you're not off the hook yet," Kairi argued as Axel slumped onto the couch. She rolled her eyes as he turned the television on. "Are you hungry at all, Riku? I have some snacks."

Riku sunk in one of the dining chairs, letting his feet rest in the seat across from him. "Sure, you know I can always eat."

Kairi poured a bag of potato chips in a bowl and then joined Riku at the table. They talked about everything that had happened in their time apart. Riku was also a professor at Twilight U, but he focused solely on personality and clinical practice. Apparently, his graduate students and classes had been exhausting him more than usual. All except Olette, of course, she was one of his students.

One thing Kairi had always appreciated about Riku was that he always asked about her. No matter how many questions Kairi asked about his work, he made sure to ask an equal amount about her affairs. She loved that he wanted to be 'in the know' when it came to her.

"You're still in a cubicle, Kai?" he asked with slightly widened aquamarine eyes (though, it was hard to tell behind his long, silver bangs), "I thought you told me they were getting you an office a year ago?"

Kairi shook her head and popped a chip in her mouth. "It keeps falling through," she explained, "I really don't mind being in a cubicle, anyway. It is what it is."

"Really? You were so excited about having your own space. This doesn't sound like the Kairi I remember," Riku pointed out, "You can't just accept that. You deserve an office of your own. You're the head."

"I keep telling her that!" Axel announced from the couch.

"Oh, hush!" Kairi called, "It's really okay, Riku. Honest."

He eyed her curiously, looking like he wanted to say more. "Hmm…well, keep me posted, okay? And I promise to come over more often. I know I've really dropped the ball on our friendship," he admitted, "But I think about you all the time, Kairi. I do wonder how you're doing."

"You can always just ask. You know, instead of wondering," Kairi giggled.

"Sora always says you're busy when I ask about stopping by so I tried not to bother you. I figured I'd be imposing on you if I dropped in like I used to," Riku admitted. Kairi's smile dropped. "I know how much you value your work and I didn't want to intrude on any wedding planning you might be doing."

"Busy? I'm never too busy for you, Riku. I don't even bring my work home with me. Yeah, I have been trying to plan the wedding but I would've welcomed you." She furrowed her brows. "I wonder why Sora would say that."

Riku shrugged. "I never thought to question him. We're always talking shop these days. Sorry, Kai." He reached across the table and squeezed her hand. "Well, I swear to visit at least once a week from now on."

"I would love that," Kairi replied, "I've missed you a lot, Riku." She hesitated. "But I really don't understand why Sora would say that about me…I'm going to ask him about it when he gets back from his trip."

Riku helped himself to several more potato chips. Kairi's smile returned; he still ate like he did when he was a teenager. "What trip is Sora on?" Riku asked between bites.

Kairi was startled. "You didn't know? He's in Radiant Garden for the new promotion he got."

"Hmm, I wonder why he didn't mention the trip to me. He usually tells me everything," Riku pondered, "That's strange."

Something was strange indeed. Riku was right; Sora was constantly talking about his work successes. It didn't make sense that he wouldn't tell Riku about his trip, especially since he'd said Riku couldn't go with him as though he'd asked.

"Sora didn't ask you if you could go?" Kairi asked, her heartrate increasing.

Riku shook his head. "No…is everything all right, Kairi?" He removed his feet from their resting spot and leaned toward her. "You can tell me anything. You know that, right?"

She hesitated. She didn't want to involve Riku in her problems with Sora. The two of them had always been close, like brothers. Kairi forced a smile and shook her head. "No, Riku. Everything's all right. I'll just ask him about his trip when he comes back." Riku looked wary but she waved him off. "I should get some rest. I'm still recovering from my illness, after all."

Kairi walked Riku to his car, which he'd parked in their driveway. He hugged her tightly and it took all of her resolve not to burst into tears. She put on a brave face as he drove away, watching his dark blue car until it disappeared after turning left at the stop sign.

Her head was spinning. Had Sora lied to her? She slipped back inside her home, falling against the back of the door as her mind reeled. She hardly noticed that Axel had scooped her into his arms as her questions about Sora weighed on her mind.

"Kairi, snap out of it," Axel urged, "I'm taking you to the couch." Soon, she was seated, unable to breathe correctly. "Come on. Talk to me, princess."

She looked at him with a crazed expression. "Sora lied to me, Axel. He said he asked Riku to come with him but that he was too busy. He kept Riku away from me by saying that I was busy. H-He asked to go to Radiant Garden with Naminé!"

Axel grimaced. "Kairi, you need to call him."

She wrapped her arms around herself. "Call him? I couldn't. What if I bother him?"

Axel placed his hand on her shoulder. "If what you're thinking is true then he's not on a business trip and you need to bother him."

She bit her lip. Axel was right. She had to confront Sora if she was going to have any peace of mind. "Bring me my phone, please." Axel consented and quickly returned with her black cell phone.

"I'll give you some space. Just call if you need me, all right?"

She nodded, watching his lanky figure disappear into the hall. She stared at the screen of her phone. Her background picture was of her and Sora; she'd snapped the shot over breakfast one morning before Axel had moved in. Sora was hardly smiling in it. What would she discover if she called him? Was he…

"No!" Kairi exclaimed. She shook her head and balled her fists. "Sora would never do that. I'm sure there's an explanation." Her eyes nervously fell back to her cell phone. "I'll just call and casually ask about Riku. It'll be fine."

She moved her finger to call Sora then thought better of it. Instead, she dialed his number and withheld her own. He wouldn't know it was her so he couldn't continue to lie if that's what he'd been doing.  _It will be fine, it will be fine. Sora loves me!_ The thought did little to soothe her as she waited.

_"_ _Hello?"_

It wasn't Sora's voice; it was a woman's voice that she didn't recognize. "Hi, I'm calling for Sora Yuuki."

_"_ _Oh, hold on. Sora, sweetie, someone's on the phone for-"_

Kairi cut the line immediately. Sora,  _sweetie_? She threw her phone onto the carpet in a moment of blind rage. Her rage, however, quickly transformed to despair as she slipped from the couch to the floor. Who answered his phone? Who was calling him sweetie? Was it Naminé? Was Sora…cheating?

"Axel!" Kairi screamed, succumbing to the emotions she'd been restraining for years.


	17. Carried Away

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a warning that we are getting into maturer content this chapter and on.

Sora still had no idea she'd called. Kairi couldn't work up the courage to call again and confront him over the phone. Instead, she decided to wait for him to come home. Axel helped her prepare what she was going to say, and comforted her when it all became too much.

She couldn't believe this was happening to her. What happened to the special bond that she and Sora had built over the years? She paced her living room, wringing her fingers. Sora had texted her that he was returning that night, completely oblivious to her knowledge or pain. He'd even put a heart emoji in the text. It was crushing her.

"Kairi, you're going to have a conniption if you don't calm down," Axel advised from his seat on the couch. He was munching away on a bowl of Sora's favorite cereal. "You're making it very hard to watch TV."

"How can you be so calm?" Kairi accused, "I'm going to lose him!"

Axel sighed and motioned for her to sit next to him. She reluctantly complied. "Kairi, is all this pacing going to change the situation?" She shook her head. "Is it making you feel better?" She shook her head again. "Then I suggest you try something else. Being a ball of nerves when he arrives isn't going to help you either."

"I see your point, but what can I do?"

He shrugged. "What do you like to do? You know, that doesn't involve your sweetums."

It was sad that she couldn't come up with a hobby she had. She realized her entire life had revolved around Sora's comings and goings for even longer than their engagement. When had she stopped putting emphasis on the things she loved?

"…You don't have any hobbies?" Axel questioned.

"Well…I used to like making crafts. Like little trinkets and charms."

"Figures you'd do something so girly."

"Hey!"

Axel smirked. "See, you're already calming down. Go make a trinket or something."

She blinked. Was it really that easy? She glanced at the clock. It was going on seven. Knowing Sora, he'd come home as late as possible. "I guess I will. Thank you, Axel."

"Don't sweat it. If you want me to sit with you at the table, I will."

"No, that's okay. I know how to get your attention."

She went to the linen closet in the hall and pulled out her dusty box of craft supplies. Kairi could hardly remember the last time she'd set out to make something. It must've been before she was engaged. Her collection had always meant something to her, though, so she'd never gotten rid of it. After all, she'd collected half of the supplies herself on Destiny Islands. She had shells of all colors, pressed flowers, and small knick knacks she'd found in the sand.

She set her supplies up and sat in the dining chair closest to the door. Sora wasn't going to be able to weasel his way out of this one.

* * *

The slam of the door shook her awake. Groggily, she looked around the dark room and spotted Sora flipping on the kitchen light.

"S-Sora?" she called weakly, adjusting her bleary eyes, "What time is it?"

Sora was at her side in an instant. "It's midnight, Kai. What have you been doing?" he chuckled as he began wiping beads off her face.

She smiled. "Looks like I fell asleep. I was crafting so I could-oh…Sora, we need to talk now." Kairi yawned, regretting that her sleepiness prevented her from sounding stern. She moved to stand then realized she was being weighed down by a blanket that had been wrapped around her. Axel must've put it there.

"Here, I'll sit," Sora offered, plopping down in the chair adjacent to hers, "What's on your mind? I can't wait to tell you all about my trip."

Kairi hesitated. He didn't sound guilty at all. Maybe she had misinterpreted what she heard? No, that couldn't be possible. Sora had still lied about asking Riku. "Actually, it is about your trip. Sora, while you were away Riku stopped by."

Sora didn't falter. "Oh really? That was nice of him!"

She nodded. "Yes, he told me something that disturbed me. He said he hadn't been coming because you said I was too busy. Is that true?"

"It is. I thought you wouldn't want any distractions from your planning. You were very dedicated to it, Kairi," Sora explained with a small frown, "Did I say something wrong?"

"Sora, you know that Riku is a great friend to me. A best friend. You made it seem like he wasn't important to me anymore!" she exclaimed, "The three of us have always been so close, but now because of what you said, I've felt so isolated." Sora reached out to comfort her but she swatted his hand away. "No, that's not all. Riku also told me he had no idea you were taking a trip to Radiant Garden. You told me that you'd asked him!"

Sora looked flushed. His sunny exterior was darkening by the second. "I don't remember saying that. Are you sure?"

"Of course I'm sure!"

He chuckled, "I mean, you were pretty heavily medicated when I left, Kai. How are you feeling now?"

"Don't change the subject, Sora. I called you while you were away."

Sora tilted his head. "I didn't have any missed calls from you."

"No, you didn't, because I concealed my number."

"Why would you-"

Kairi bit her lip. The urge to cry was beginning to overpower her. "And a woman picked up the phone!" Sora tried to speak but she talked over him. "And she called you sweetie!" She blinked, letting a few tears roll down her cheeks. "Sora, are you cheating on me?"

Sora slumped in his chair. He looked exasperated and his silence only signified to Kairi that it was true. Sora was cheating on her and she'd stupidly agreed to letting him go with the woman he preferred over her. When he said he'd wanted her to go with him, he was probably lying to butter her up for his real request.

"I don't know what to say, Kairi." She hated how he spoke her name. "I can't believe this is happening. I never thought you'd lose faith in me like this."

"What?"

Sora's fists were balled in his lap. He looked so rigid it was unnatural. "I can't even defend myself. You've already created all the answers for yourself!" He jumped to his feet and began pacing next to the dining table. "Kairi, I know I haven't always given you all the attention you wanted, but you're still so important to me. I told you, you ground me! Why can't that be enough for you? I proposed to you. I've been with you all these years. If I wanted to leave, don't you think I would have?"

Kairi felt herself grow smaller in her chair. How was it possible that she was wrong? All of the evidence pointed to Sora cheating.

"Naminé probably answered the phone while I was in the shower or something. Yeah, she has a nickname for me, but doesn't Axel have one for you?" Sora accused. Kairi stiffened.

"A-Axel has a nickname for everyone."

"Yeah and mine must be stupid. If you're so accepting of Axel, shouldn't you also accept Naminé? I always talk about her. You should be able to trust her more than that. I've told you how much she adores you and wants to meet you."

"Then why hasn't she, Sora?" Kairi questioned, finding her voice again, "It's like you've been hiding her from me! You could've brought her over for dinner or even introduced me at your department party, but you didn't. Why is that?"

"She wasn't even there!"

Kairi was on her feet. "How can I take your word for it when you lied about Riku?"

Sora's eyes widened. "Now you're gonna bring Riku into this? I didn't lie! He did have plans and I guess they were to come and see you. If you want, let's call him right now and get this all settled!" Sora angrily yanked his phone from his pocket.

She shook her head. "No, please don't bother him. It's late…" she pleaded. The last thing she wanted to do was drag Riku into drama in the middle of the night. Especially since it was becoming apparent she'd simply imagined it all. A fresh wave of tears assaulted her. How could she do this to Sora? He loved her and she'd accused him of betrayal. "I-I'm so sorry," she choked, covering her face with her hands.

Sora had her wrapped in his arms sooner than she could process. He held her closely and rested his chin on her head. "Kairi, please don't cry. It's okay, I forgive you," he cooed, "You've been sick and lonely and this wouldn't have happened if I spent more time with you. I should've listened to you earlier. I should've made more time for you."

"Do you mean it?" She freed her head from his chest and looked into his eyes. "Do you really?"

He nodded. "Yes, Kai. It's clear to me now just how much this has affected you. I should've taken Axel seriously when he came and confronted me about how things were between us."

Kairi gasped, "Axel confronted you?"

Sora chuckled and looked away. "Yeah…it made me mad but I should've known better."

Kairi smiled, wiping the remaining tears from her eyes. Axel truly was always looking out for her. She'd have to thank him later. "Sora…I'm sorry about all of this. I feel silly now." She blushed. "I got carried away."

He kissed her and it wasn't on her forehead. It was like her dreams. She closed her eyes and gave into the feelings of passion that began building inside her as his hands dropped to her waist. He pulled her against him, massaging his fingers into her sides. When he finally pulled away, they were both breathless.

Sora bent down slightly so he could look her in the eyes. "It's my turn to get carried away, Kai." Before she could react, he scooped her up and carried her to their bedroom. He kicked the door closed and gently placed her on their mattress. Sora grinned. "Kairi, your face is the color of your hair!"

She lightly pushed his shoulder. "Stop it!" she whined, "You're supposed to say I'm beautiful." He captured her lips again, daring to begin pulling off her robe. She regretted that she'd worn a pair of cotton pajamas instead of something thinner and feminine.

Kairi moaned as Sora's lips dropped to her neck. The sensation of his mouth lightly sucking her skin overwhelmed her. She gasped, fingering bunches of his hair, craving more pressure from his lips. He wasted no time in unfastening the buttons of her pajama shirt. She hastily shook her arms out of the sleeves and tossed it away.

He pulled away and paused to look at her. Kairi caught a glimpse of the love she'd been missing before he eagerly kissed her again. She could feel him moaning against her mouth while his hands caressed up and down her bare back. Kairi shuddered from the mere texture of his rough hands. She'd almost forgotten what it felt like to be with him. A dream could never capture it truly. Her breath caught in her throat as she remembered how her dream had ended.

This time it was Kairi that pulled away. "What about Axel?" she found herself whispering.

Sora scrunched his nose. "What about him?"

"He could hear us," she explained. His eyes were glazed with lust. It'd been so long since he'd looked at her with desire. She almost regretted stopping him.

He climbed into the bed with her, kicking off his shoes before he lowered her to the mattress with his body. "This is what he wanted, isn't it? For us to find each other again?" he suggested. Sora gently caressed her face, letting his fingers trail down to her chest. Kairi was struggling to find reasons to argue with him. Why should she? This was what she'd been waiting for.

"I guess you're right," she managed to say before Sora moved in for another consuming round of kisses. This time she didn't stop him and began undoing the buttons of his shirt. She couldn't help but wonder if Sora was right. Is this what Axel wanted? However, the thought was soon forgotten; it was hard to think of anything else as Sora's affection grew bolder.


	18. Heartbreak

Axel had never been in a fouler mood. At least, not since he'd moved into the Sora and Kairi household. Which he thought was saying something because he'd definitely been in some foul moods there. He was dressed in a pair of slacks, button down, and a skinny, black tie. He had to go to his new job today to fill out some on-boarding paperwork and he had a feeling they didn't want to see him in his ratty, black tees.

He drank down the last of his coffee (because he'd been up early enough to make it) and resisted the urge to slam the mug into the sink.

All night he'd asked himself the same questions. What the hell was wrong with Kairi? Why did he care? And, again, how could Kairi be so easily manipulated? He'd heard the entire argument. As soon as Sora had strolled into the townhome, he'd been alert and listening, ready to jump out and defend Kairi if needed. Unfortunately, he hadn't needed to. In fact, she'd been so easily defeated by Sora it was almost laughable. Almost.

Then, because he was so  _alert_  he'd had to listen to most of their session before he found his ear plugs. Listening to Kairi moan and sigh from her fiancé's ministrations was definitely in the top five of his list of painful experiences. Just thinking about it was enough to send him over the top. But why did he care? Why should he care if she spent the rest of her life being deceived by Sora? Why had he involved himself?

Axel closed his eyes in an attempt to calm himself. Immediately Kairi's smiling face popped into his mind. How could the object of his torment also soothe him? He ran his fingers through his hair, careful not to make it any messier. Today was picture day, after all. He wasn't going to take a horrible badge photo because Kairi got dickmatized last night.

"You look awful."

Then again, maybe he was wrong. His emerald eyes cut toward Sora. The brunette looked pleased with himself and well-rested; the complete opposite of how he felt. "Did we keep you up?" Sora mused as he fiddled with his red tie.

Axel chuckled darkly, "Whatever could you mean, Sora? I slept like a baby."

Sora grinned. "Kairi did too."

It took all of his self-restraint not to leap across the kitchen and throttle Sora where he stood. Instead, he took in a deep breath and lifted his hands in surrender. "I don't want to fight you, Sora. We have a lot in common, you know. We both care for that princess back there," he began steadily, "I'd apologize for breaking boundaries, but my heart just wouldn't be in it. Besides, I won't be a problem for you much longer. I'm leaving."

Sora nodded. "You're my friend, Axel. I've been happy to help you out and I'm glad that you and Kairi became friends," he answered, "But I think Kairi and I need some time to ourselves. You were right, I've been neglecting her."

_How convenient that you realize this now._

"Right. I should be out in two weeks, max."

"Great! Well, have a good day!" Axel watched as Sora left, clenching his fists as soon as he was gone.

"You're leaving in two weeks?"

All of the tension in his body released. Axel gulped and turned his head to take in the sight of Kairi. His heart burned for her; she was stunning. She was already dressed in her standard pencil skirt and blouse. Today's blouse color was teal.

"You heard that?"

She nodded. "Don't listen to Sora. You don't have to leave so soon. You're welcome to stay as long as you need, okay?" Axel was surprised by how confident she suddenly looked. The woman he'd covered in a blanket last night was not the same woman that stood before him now. Love brought out the best in her, despite how misplaced that love was. Now, he was even more attracted to her. Curses.

"Nah, I think I'm out, Kairi." She frowned and he wished he could hate her for it. Couldn't she see how painful this was for him? Perhaps she and Sora did have something in common: being oblivious to another's feelings. Not missing a beat, he added, "Try to keep it down next time, huh? You made me dig for my earplugs last night."

Kairi's confident face quickly colored. "O-Oh, Axel, I, ah!" she squeaked, nearly spilling coffee on the front of her shirt.

He smirked. Even in his foul mood, teasing Kairi could cheer him up. "You sounded pretty similar last night."

She turned and smacked his arm. "Stop it!" she cried, "I don't want to hear anymore!"

He gritted his teeth. "Funny, I thought the exact same thing last night."

"You're impossible!"

"You won't have to put up with it for much longer."

The blotchiness of Kairi's face slowly faded to the usual creamy tone of her skin. "Axel…"

He put up his hand. "Say no more, Kairi. I heard your conversation last night and as much as it  _kills_  me to say this I'll be happy if you are."

"What do you mean?"

"It's none of your concern. Anyway, I'm off." He walked toward the front door, but paused at the dining table. "Uh oh, I think heartthrob left his phone."

Kairi was at his side in a flash. "Oh no!"

"Want me to take it to him?"

She shook her head and gingerly picked up the device, cradling it in her hands. "I'll do it on my way to work."

Axel raised a brow. "That's in the opposite direction."

"It doesn't matter. I won't be late."

"All right. See you later, Kairi."

"Axel, wait." He turned his head to face her. "I don't care what Sora says. It's okay if you have a nickname for me." He felt himself weaken. It was those damn eyes. Did she know how powerful she was?

He turned away, fearing she could see how he truly felt by the look on his face. "Later, princess."

* * *

The onboarding process had taken his mind off the Sora and Kairi affair. He was grateful the local community college had let him be a lecturer despite his blacklisted status. They knew his true identity and they were still so grateful to have someone as talented as himself. Their words, not his. Surprisingly enough.

He shoved his key in the door and made his way inside the townhome. Not wasting a moment, he undid his tie and draped it over his shoulders. It would be good for him to start fresh. New job, new apartment, new love interest, perhaps? Xion was always offering to set him up with one of her friends.

He paused at the end of the dining table. Then again, perhaps he would be stuck with the same, old love interest that was currently seated on the floor, staring a hole into the carpet.

Kairi looked lifeless. Her half-lidded, indigo eyes were pits of emptiness with dangerous amounts of eyeliner and mascara streaking from them. Axel squatted down to get a closer look at her; she didn't even react to his presence. He let out a breath once he confirmed she was still breathing. He moved to wake her up, but paused once he spotted the phone that was a few feet away from her. Had she been in this position since he left?

He plucked the phone from the ground and turned on the screen. It was definitely Sora's phone; he knew because Kairi didn't have a lock on hers. Axel turned off the screen and checked the finger smudges on the glass before trying a few swipes and gaining access. The screen lit up to a text message conversation. The contact listed was "Nam".

"Is this what you were looking at, princess?" he mused as he scrolled to the top. She didn't budge. If this kept up he was going to have to call for an ambulance; Kairi was seriously freaking him out. Axel began reading the messages.

_Sora, I love you. You know that right?_

_I love you too, Naminé._

_When are you going to leave her?_

_Just be patient. I'll figure this out._

"The little weasel," Axel grumbled. He was compelled to read more.

_Are you coming over tonight? I've got a surprise for you._

_Of course! I love surprises! Can I have a hint?_

She'd sent a photo of lace. Axel had no doubts what the surprise was. He clicked out of the message window and was surprised by Sora again. The background of his phone was a picture of himself, Naminé, and a few other department members. Riku was not in the photo, thankfully. That was the last thing Kairi needed to see. It could've easily been mistaken for a group photo, but Axel could read between the lines. Sora and Naminé were standing next to each other and Naminé had her hand on his arm.

He glanced at Kairi. How he wished he'd been wrong.


	19. Past the Limit

"Kairi, come on," Axel urged, giving her shoulders another shake. She didn't respond. It was like she was a porcelain doll. Her skin was clammy and pale. It seemed like she was losing color by the minute. Even her pupils were enlarged under her wet eyelashes.

The only thing Axel could be sure of were the breaths she was slowly taking. He lifted her wrist and felt for a pulse. He wasn't a doctor, but feeling the beat of her heart assured him she was still there. But for how long? He should've been a doctor instead of a researcher.

Axel pushed a few stray strands of her hair behind her ears and tried to look into her vacant eyes. "Can she even see me?" he groaned before standing to his full height. This was too much for him to handle alone. He needed help.

Axel scanned the area and spotted Kairi's phone on the kitchen counter. He grabbed it and began sifting through her contacts. First, he would call her work and explain that he'd come home and found her barely conscious. Then, he would call the only person he could think of to meet him at the emergency room, Riku. He glanced at Kairi's form again. This wasn't good at all.

The next time he saw Sora he was going to give into his urge to throttle him.

Axel was more convinced of this assertion as he paced across the waiting area of the emergency room. Nothing about the place was comforting. It was a small section of the building, lined with uncomfortable-looking, brown chairs. There was one television that was circulating a news broadcast on mute with subtitles. As if the family and friends of their patients would be soothed by silence interrupted by keyboard tapping and panicking neighbors.

The medical staff had taken Kairi to be examined shortly after he arrived with her in his arms. As if the situation couldn't get any worse, he was told since he was not a family member he was not allowed to accompany her. Axel figured it would be in bad taste to lie to medical workers about being her husband so he didn't bother. Instead, he cursed himself to damnable waiting.

The sliding doors opened and Riku came charging through. The man looked as bewildered as Axel felt.

"Finally!" Axel breathed.

"What happened?" Riku asked, trying to catch his breath, "I ran most of the way here. I missed the bus."

Axel frowned. "You're going to want to have a seat for this one." The two men took chairs in the far corner of the room. Axel slid Sora's phone out of his pocket. He unlocked it, pulled up Sora's messages, and handed the phone to Riku to read.

"So this is why you begged me not to say anything to Sora. That idiot. I should've known," Riku groaned as he scrolled through the text exchange between Sora and Naminé, "I always thought they spent too much time together."

"No kidding."

"How is she?"

Axel shrugged. "I came home and found her unresponsive on the ground. Her eyes were open but she didn't even register that I was there, calling to her," he explained with a growing frown, "I put her in my car and brought her here, but they wouldn't let me go back with her."

"Listen, I'm going to confront Sora," Riku began.

Axel crossed his arms and leaned against the back of the chair. "Oh?"

"Sora should get the smack he deserves. He should know what the consequences are of his foolish actions. He should know it's not okay to treat her like this. Who knows how long he's been having an affair!" Riku nearly shouted, earning himself some stares. His face flushed and he lowered his voice. "It's my job as Sora's best friend and Kairi's protector."

Axel suppressed a chortle. "Her protector? Where have you been then, mister knight? Last time I checked, I'm the one who's been there for her this whole time."

Riku narrowed his aquamarine eyes to slits. "Well, forgive me for trusting my best friend to take care of her. This isn't like him. Surely you're surprised too?"

He hesitated. Admittedly, cheating did seem out of character for Sora. The man Axel knew was kind, warm-hearted, and always looked out for his friends. Ever since he moved in, it had seemed strange to him that Sora would act so coldly toward the person who was supposed to be on top of his priority list.

"Axel Fierro?"

Axel jolted at the sound of his name. A nurse was standing in the waiting room with a clipboard in his hand. Hesitantly, Axel approached the man who smiled once he realized the redhead was who he called.

"I need you to come with me."

"Is something wrong?" Axel questioned, "Is Kairi-"

"Ms. Hart is fine." Axel visibly relaxed. "She's just been asking for you and since we're done administering the physical tests, I thought I'd come and get you. She'll most likely be discharged in an hour or two if her results come back fine." It was the best news he could have heard.

Axel turned to Riku. "I'm going to her," he announced, "Why don't you return Sora's phone to him. That should be interesting."

Riku rolled his eyes. "Whatever. Call me as soon as she's out. I'm going to take care of business." Axel nodded and watched him leave, noting the tension in the man's muscles. He made a mental note not to get on Riku's bad side as he followed the nurse back to where Kairi was.

She looked pitiful lying in a hospital bed with an IV drip attached to her arm. Her head was turned away from him, looking out the window. He hoped she'd at least react when he called her name this time.

"Kairi?"

She slowly turned her head and he could see she'd been crying again. At least someone had been kind enough to wipe the makeup off her face. He closed the distance between them quickly and sat on her bedside. Kairi couldn't even say a word, all that came out of her mouth was a hiccup followed by full-blown sobbing.

She clearly needed him so Axel tossed all propriety to the wind. Careful of her IV, he lowered himself beside her and wrapped his arms around her. She fell into him and he let her cry as much as she wanted.

If Riku didn't kill Sora, he was going to.


	20. Accountability

Axel took Kairi home once she was discharged. He was grateful that nothing was wrong with her, besides the obvious heartbreak. The drive back to the townhome was painfully quiet, except for the sound of a few sniffles and half sobs. He wasn't sure how she was going to finish her week; she could hardly speak a sentence without falling to pieces.

He walked her inside and lead her to her bedroom. As soon as he opened the door, Kairi was shaking her head with fresh tears running down her cheeks. Axel mentally berated himself for being so stupid. Of course Kairi wasn't going to want to be in the bed she'd just been in with Sora. So, he let her rest in the room he'd come to call his own.

Axel helped her settle into the sheets and then resumed his perch by her side. She eventually fell asleep, looking as disturbed as she had when she was awake. Axel would've been content to spend the rest of the evening next to her if he hadn't heard the front door slam. The noise evoked a small groan from her but thankfully she didn't wake. He placed a small kiss on her temple and then leapt from her side. After carefully closing her door, he stormed to the entrance of the hall. Sora recoiled at the sight of him.

"Axel-"

It only took a few seconds. He crossed the room and punched Sora square in the face. His cerulean eyes were wide with shock, but Axel wasn't finished. The furious man grabbed Sora by the collar raising him from the ground slightly. Silent sparks were flying between the two of them.

"What are you doing here?" he seethed. His volume dropped as he thought of Kairi's sleeping face. "You have some guts, Sora."

"I live here," Sora replied boldly. He grabbed Axel's hand and ripped it off his shirt, stretching the collar. "And I need to talk to Kairi. I need to explain what happened!"

"Keep your voice down, she's asleep after crying her eyes out all day."

Sora glowered at him. "Kairi is  _my_ fiancé and I don't need you telling me about her. Now, let me through," he demanded quietly. If Axel hadn't been so pissed off, he might have appreciated Sora's efforts to keep the noise down.

"Not happening, punk."

Sora charged him. Axel staggered, slightly impressed by Sora's strength. The two men began wrestling near the entrance of the hall, way too close to where Kairi was resting. Axel shoved him backward and into the edge of the couch. Sora held onto the fabric to prevent himself from hitting the floor.

The tanned ray of sunshine looked like he was about to make more demands, so Axel held up his finger to his lips. Sora's eyes narrowed. "Don't you think you've done enough?" Axel snarled.

Sora dodged Axel's attempt to grab him, running behind the table. He pursued casually, guarding the path to the hall with outstretched arms. "You don't understand," Sora snapped, "I didn't have a choice!" The two men would've looked like five-year-olds playing tag if it hadn't been for the viciousness of their stares. Axel found it ironic; he imagined Sora, Riku, and Kairi must've played similarly in their youth. Before Sora became an asshole.

"Didn't have a choice? What a load of bullshit!" Axel growled, daring to leap across the table. Both he and Sora winced at the 'thunk' sound his body made as it smacked against the wood. Axel paused, listening for any sounds coming from the hall before continuing, "I saw your texts, Sora. You went over and fucked  _Nam_  willingly while Kairi was waiting for you to come home."

Sora suddenly bolted, rushing around the table. Axel cursed himself under his breath and leapt toward the man. The moment Sora was in his grasp, Axel was going to rip him limb from limb.

The determined fiancé was knocked into the kitchen and Axel nearly tumbled on top of him. "Stay out of my business!" Sora cried. He froze and covered his mouth. Axel shushed him spitefully. Sora lowered his voice, to add, "I'm not going to just leave her like this. She's imp-"

Axel stopped him with a hard poke to the chest. "She's important to you? Is that what you were going to say? You don't cheat on people that are important to you. What the hell, Sora. She doesn't need importance, she needs love. And you've already proven what a shitty supplier you are of it."

Sora hesitated with a disgusted expression. "You love her, don't you?" Axel paled. He couldn't even deny what he was being accused of. The realization startled him enough for Sora to slam him into the fridge. He didn't bother to fight back; he let Sora savagely swing at him.

All he could think about was how deeply he loved Kairi and how much of an idiot he'd been for being in denial. Axel loved her with sickeningly sweet devotion. There would be no other love interest. She was it.

"Keeping me away from her isn't going to make her consider you," Sora panted, taking a step back from Axel, "We've been together since we were sixteen and I'm not going to let you tear us apart."

He eyed Sora carefully. Perhaps there was truth to his words. Kairi was head over heels for the man in front of him. And how could she not be? Even Xion had commented on how 'dreamy' the brunette was when they'd met for the first time. Sora was younger, softer around the edges, and way more upbeat than Axel could ever hope to be. There was no reason Kairi would ever be interested in him.

"She'll come back to me, I know she will," Sora vowed, "Soon, this won't even matter."

Axel snapped. "Are you telling me that Kairi's pain won't even matter to you?" His voice was deadly. He could see the fear beginning to rise in Sora's eyes. Maybe Axel wasn't young or upbeat, but at least he could take responsibility for his actions.

Axel attacked and Sora responded with equal intensity. They knocked against the fridge again, disturbing the cookie jar that had peacefully existed on its top. The paopu fruit lid slipped off the jar and hurtled toward the ground. Axel nearly shouted an obscenity and he would have if Riku hadn't caught the lid in his hands.

"Outside. Now," Riku commanded. He set the lid on the counter, grabbed Sora off Axel, and dragged the brunette to the front door. Axel followed, already feeling bruises forming across his body.

Sora wiped the blood that was beginning to leak from his nose as he stood on the porch. "He won't let me see her!" Sora cried, "Riku-"

"I told you not to come here, Sora!" Riku shouted, losing all composure, "And what do you do? You wait till I'm in a meeting to sneak away. She's not in a condition to talk to you about this. What part of her being hospitalized do you not understand?" Sora lowered his eyes to the ground.

Axel smirked victoriously. There was nothing sweeter than watching Sora be brought down a size by his best friend.

"And you!" Riku added hastily.

He shrank a bit. "Me?"

"You really think  _this_ is what she'd want? The two of you at each other's throats?"

It was Axel's turn to feel ashamed. He knew she wouldn't have been happy to see him beating the shit out of Sora (because obviously that's what would have happened), but how could he not? Sora had broken her heart. Not only that, he'd lied to her face and manipulated her, slept with her as though everything was fine, and now he was demanding the opportunity to hurt her again. No, Axel wouldn't stand for it anymore.

"He can't be here Riku," Axel finally replied.

"Where am I supposed to go?" Sora asked, "This is my home. I have more of a right to it than you, Axel."

"Go live with your fuckbuddy."

"So you can make my fiancé yours?"

Axel would've attacked him again if Riku hadn't stepped between them. "You're going to stay with me, Sora," he declared sternly, "And Axel is going to stay with Kairi because that is what she would want. I will be visiting daily. And until she's ready, you're going to make yourself scarce."

"What if-never mind. I need my belongings," Sora grumbled, clearly unhappy with what had been determined.

Riku sighed, massaging his forehead above the bridge of his nose. "I'll go in with you to get them. We'll be right out."

Axel slammed his fist against the edge of the townhome once they were inside. He couldn't stop thinking about what Sora had said. Axel was in love with Kairi, the woman who was fiercely in love with Sora.  _How could I have let this happen?_ Axel would've beat his fist into the wall again if the front door hadn't re-opened.

The brunette still looked extremely agitated as he held his box of belongings. He stared into the piles of clothes and items he'd carelessly tossed in. Axel had to admit it was a strange assortment that he'd packed: a wooden sail boat, stuffed dolls, and a wooden sword were inside. There was a flicker of emotion in Sora's eyes that Axel couldn't pinpoint. He hoped it was something akin to remorse.

Stubbornly, Sora began, "She is my fiancé-"

"Ex-fiancé," Axel clarified, "You don't seriously think she'll still have you, do you?" Sora glared at Axel but said nothing more.

Riku placed his hand on Sora's shoulder. Surprisingly, the brunette slumped in defeat. "Sora, it's time to go. If you truly care for her, you'll let her recover."

He sighed and nodded his head. Sora looked positively pathetic as he made his way down the sidewalk.

Once Sora was out of hearing range, Axel turned to Riku curiously. "So, what is your plan, mister protector? You won't be able to keep him away forever."

Riku nodded, watching as Sora drove away. "I know. I don't need forever. I just need to understand why this happened. Sora has loved Kairi for as long as I can remember. This doesn't make any sense."

Axel scoffed. He was done feeling 'surprised' by Sora's actions. Sora was a man, and men were human and subject to weaknesses and urges. Sora had simply given into his. Nothing that could be said would change that fact. He waved Riku off. "Understand all you want then. I'll be busy making sure she doesn't do anything stupid."

Riku stepped in front of Axel, looking straight into his eyes. Axel staggered, surprised by how serious the guy looked. He couldn't decide if the muscular man was going to fight him too or tell him his darkest secret.

"Take care of her," was all he said. Axel watched in disbelief as Riku walked to his car. In time, he was left outside alone.

He reached into his pocket and retrieved the charm bracelet he'd taken off Kairi's wrist while she was asleep. The hearts seemed to mock him as their silver shine glinted in the sun. He thought of Sora's words, of his certainty that Kairi would return to him. Axel clutched the bracelet tightly, wishing he could crumble it in his grasp.

There was no way in hell he was letting her return to Sora. Their engagement was over.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fun fact. This chapter was actually one of the hardest for me to write. I hope the pay-off is good and please continue to bear with me on Sora. I promise it'll all make sense at the end! In the mean time, go watch some cutscences or KH3 trailers and remember what a wonderful guy he actually is. Sorry, Sora!


	21. Apart

In one week, Kairi's life had been dismantled. The one person she had clung to so desperately was gone. She was no longer engaged to Sora.

Kairi wished she could recall how it ended clearly, but honestly, she hated to think about it. One minute she'd been headed out to return Sora's phone, the next she was sinking to the ground telling herself it couldn't be true. He couldn't have touched her, no, made love to her with such dedicated passion after going on a trip with another woman. Yet, it was the truth.

She'd woken up in a hospital bed and freaked out again. The only person she'd called for was Axel. He was the only one she wanted to see. As soon as she could convince the nurses and doctor that she was in a right state of mind he was there.

Kairi thought he might pull up a chair and hold her hand. That would've been enough for her. But as always, Axel went above and beyond. He refused to leave her side and held her until she'd cried herself hoarse. Then, she was discharged and advised to stay hydrated and take time off work. The social worker at discharge gave her numbers for counseling resources in Twilight Town. Kairi supposed it was standard procedure after someone was brought to the emergency room for having a mental breakdown.

What happened next was where the blur began. Axel brought her home but she couldn't step foot into the room she shared with Sora without feeling faint. So, she'd taken over the guest room and Axel moved to the couch. Riku was in and out of the townhome multiple times a day to check on her. She refused to leave the bedroom so he came to her and they talked. About what, Kairi had no clue. She could hear her voice in her ears but she couldn't make sense of her words.

At some point, Sora had taken his belongings and left. He didn't confront her or try to prove himself innocent. He didn't even say goodbye. To make matters worse, she'd lost her charm bracelet in all the emotional chaos. Now that she could think clearer, she suspected Sora had taken it with him. That's how she knew it was over.

What a week.

Kairi wrapped the blanket tighter around her body, covering half her face with the cloth. The sheets were beginning to lose their smell of Axel and it was unsettling her. He was her rock. She needed him. As though he knew, Axel opened the door and popped his fiery head in.

"Princess?"

She slightly lifted her head. "Come here, please."

He didn't need to be told twice. Axel was snuggled in beside her in mere seconds. She settled into him, facing away, as he moved pieces of her messy, red locks out of her face.

"You've been in bed all week," he commented softly, "Plan to get up anytime soon?"

"I don't know."

"It's not healthy-"

"I know."

He sighed, "Kairi-" She cleared her throat. "Er, princess. You know I can't just leave you like this, don't you?" She was afraid he would say that. "Getting out of this room, returning back to work, it might help you feel better."

She frowned. "I'm not sure it's possible to feel better, Axel. I've lost everything."

"Not everything. Just some dead weight."

"Axel!"

He smirked. "Sorry, couldn't resist."

Kairi was on the verge of tears again. It felt like she cried every few hours. "H-He was everything, Axel," she sobbed, "How can I-?"

"Kairi-"

She shook her head, letting a few tears flow freely. "He didn't even come to see me after I was in the hospital!" Axel was silent. He simply stroked the hairs on the top of her head as she trembled. "We were supposed to always find our way back to each other, Axel. I don't understand what happened."

"Maybe you should talk to one of these shrinks," Axel suggested, placing the business cards she'd received from the emergency room in front of her.

She buried her head further in the blanket. "I don't know!"

Axel stroked the top of her head. "I go to work on Monday, princess…we've got to figure something out."

"I'm afraid to leave this room. I don't want to face everything," she whispered. She freed her left arm from its soft prison and stared at the engagement ring she still hadn't taken off. "It'll be real."

"You're not in this alone. You've got Riku. I'm sure Olette would be willing to come over. I bet I could even get Xion to come. You three could have a girl's night."

She bit her lip. Axel was right. Riku was as diligent as ever and Olette was probably worried sick that she hadn't heard from her in a week. Kairi wasn't well acquainted with Xion, but something told her that she would be a nice companion. However, all three of them paled in comparison to the red-haired man beside her.

"But what about you?"

"What about me?" Axel questioned.

She frowned. "You said two weeks max."

Axel pulled away from her. Kairi barely stifled a whine; she didn't want to sound as needy as she felt. He turned her toward him, slightly unraveling her blanket and revealing the top of her lilac pajama dress. Her eyes found his and she felt a new wave of tears threatening to overcome her. What would she do without him?

"Kairi, I'm not going anywhere. I'll stay as long as you need."

"Why would you do that?" she found herself asking.

Axel seemed to hesitate before answering, "Because princess, we're friends. You haven't memorized it yet?"

She cracked a smile. It was the first one she could remember having since she found out the truth about Sora and Naminé. "Okay, Axel. I'll try to pick up my normal routine and if it's too hard for me I'll call one of these counselors," she agreed, "You're right, I can't hide in this room forever."

"Thatta' girl. So, Monday you'll go to work?" Kairi nodded. "All right. I'll let Riku know. How about a shower now? No offense, princess. It's not that I don't enjoy your natural musk…but you could use a shower."

Kairi blushed. "Oh…uh, sorry," she muttered, "I'll take care of that." Axel hesitated again, looking like he wanted to say more. She frowned. "I know, I know. I should wash my face too…"

Axel laughed and pushed himself from her body. "That's not what I was going to say, but you're not wrong."

She frowned. "What happened to having only positive things to say about me?"

Axel eyed her. "Giving you hygiene tips isn't negative. Besides, I never said it made you less attractive," he clarified, "But you're not in the mood for my teasing."

"But…it's part of my routine." He looked surprised. Kairi faltered under his stare. Her voice dropped to a mere whisper. "Did I say something wrong?"

Axel's neutral expression was unnerving her. He leaned closer to her, daring to place his lips near her ear. She hadn't felt so stimulated in a week. Her entire body felt like it was blushing. "If you want I can bathe you." His whisper kissed her earlobe.

She shrieked and rolled off the side of the bed. Axel jolted after her, squatting beside her while trying to control his laughter. "Kairi!" he nearly howled, "Are you all right?"

She pushed herself out of the layers of blanket that had tumbled down with her. Kairi knew her entire face was as red as Rudolph's nose. "I'm fine!" she grumbled, "You shouldn't joke about things like that!"

He smirked. "But it's part of your routine."

She jumped her feet and put her hands on her hips. "You've never been so…so sensual with me. I wasn't prepared."

He stood, towering over her with a sly smile. "And maybe I should have. Look at you now, you hardly resemble the girl I've been nursing all week. You've got your spunk back. Come on, yell at me some more, sweetheart."

"S-Sweetheart?"

Axel frowned. "Too much?"

"Ah, no. I…I'm going to shower." Without saying anything else, she scurried toward the door. Her heart was pounding in her head. How could a mere word from Axel make her feel so alive?

"Need me to get your things from the other room?"

Kairi shook her head. "No, it's about time I go in there." She paused in the doorway and looked back at him. Suddenly, she felt she loved how he looked in his black tee and jeans. Even the half gloves on his hands were endearing. "Thank you, Axel. For staying." She left before she could hear his response. Something told her she wouldn't be able to handle it.


	22. Mood Killer

Axel was right again.

Returning to work did make her feel a bit better. Being able to tackle tasks at work gave her a sense of accomplishment and purpose. She returned home each day with more pep in her step and it didn't go unnoticed. Axel was constantly complimenting her on how well she looked and asking how her day went. However, the small improvements she made struggled to compete with the immense pain she carried within her.

Kairi grabbed some dishes from her cabinets and scurried over to the dining area. Her mind drifted to the trip she'd taken after work as she began setting the table for dinner.

_The psychology building stood in front of me like an imposing force, threatening to destroy my spirit. I clutched the straps of my purse tightly as I steeled myself for what I was about to do. If Sora wouldn't come to me, I would go to him. I knew he was in there. It's where he always was._

_I choked back a sob. Perhaps I 'd been wrong about that too. How long had he been seeing Naminé? Maybe he was actually with her now. Maybe he had lied about all the times he'd worked late in the office. I faltered. Would they even let me go to his office? I wasn't his fiancé anymore and he hadn't sought me out at all._

_The sliding doors of the gray building opened and I panicked. I quickly dived behind one of the trees that lined the sidewalk leading into Sora's place of work. I took in a deep breath. I had to go in before I lost my nerve. Slowly, I peeked my head out from the tree trunk and spotted Sora striding away from the doors and away from me. Just the sight of him crushed me._

Kairi placed the third setting on the table and hesitated.  _What am I doing?_

She'd set the table as though Sora was going to walk through the door and ask what delicious meal she'd prepared that night. Kairi gripped the plate tighter feeling it rub against her engagement ring.

"Oh, good. I was going to tell you to add another," Axel announced as he strolled out the hall. He'd been granted access to the guest room since Kairi had started sleeping in her own bed again.

She was surprised to see Axel wearing one of his v-neck sweaters instead of a tee. Then again, she supposed it was getting colder. It was already October. He rolled up his sleeves and began helping her with the silverware.

"Someone joining us for dinner?" she asked as she crisply folded a napkin. She struggled to hide her distress; she didn't want to end up crying in his arms before they had someone over.

"Riku."

She visibly relaxed. "He wasn't kidding about not leaving me alone, was he?"

"Afraid not, I bought some wine on the way home. Thought it'd be nice."

"That's sweet of you."

Axel scrunched his face. "I have to say, you've never described me as sweet," he chuckled.

Kairi paused. She'd called him sweet at least a hundred times in her head. Had it really not made it out of her mind? "Well, if it's any consolation I call you that in my head all the time," she asserted with a gentle nod. She took the extra napkins and began storing them in the kitchen. Axel strolled after her and leaned against the island counter.

"Hm, sweet kinda cramps my style," Axel answered lazily, watching her as he usually did, "I didn't get these tattoos 'cause I'm sweet, princess."

She closed the cabinets and returned his gaze. Her eyes trailed to his teardrop tattoos and eventually down to his collarbone. Axel wasn't entirely wrong. Everything about him was edgy and dangerously charming. She smiled just to spite him. "No, Axel, you're sweet and…cute!" she giggled.

Axel grimaced. "Come on, really? Now I've been demoted to cute?"

Kairi crossed the kitchen and stepped in front of his body. With a grin, she tapped his nose with her index finger. "You are cute as a button," she declared, "What are you going to do about it?"

The look in his eyes weakened her resolve and that's all it took. Before she could process his movements, he'd pinned her to the refrigerator. She gasped as her head hit the freezer door. The predatory look in his eyes had returned. Flickering desire lit the pit of her stomach as she fell into his penetrative gaze.

"Am I cute now, Kairi?" He was so close to her face, she could feel his breath on her lips. It'd only take a slight head movement to kiss him, but did she want to? With him only inches away of course she wanted to. But how would she feel after? If she gave into her urges wouldn't she be just like Sora?

The doorbell rang, saving Kairi from having to respond. Axel lifted off her and grumbled under his breath as he made his way to the door. She couldn't help but watch his agitated stride; he was cuter than he gave himself credit for.

She turned to put the dinner she'd made in serving bowls, listening to Riku and Axel at the door.

"Hey, mood killer."

"Mood killer? As if you're capable of creating a mood."

Kairi giggled. Axel and Riku were closer than they'd ever been. She loved that they'd become friends despite the circumstances that had put them all in their unique situation. She set her bowl of Caesar salad on the table before running to embrace Riku. He spun her around and set her on the ground before Axel.

"Where are my flowers?" she teased. She gazed past his growing bangs and into his eyes. Riku looked exhausted.

His lips curved upward. "All these visits are draining my wallet, Kai," he joked, "I could only get you one this time." He handed her a single, yellow rose. She breathed in its scent deeply.

Kairi wasn't oblivious to the fact that Riku was stretching himself thin just for her. She squeezed his arm and gave him an appreciative smile. "Thank you, Riku. I'll put it with the others."

Axel groaned, "No wonder I can't get a mood going. You've turned all romantic gestures into signs of friendship."

Kairi giggled, trying to fight her urge to fall back into misery. Sora was always lingering in the back of her mind. Riku had told her that he was living with him, but he never talked about how Sora was doing. Judging from Riku's haggard appearance, it couldn't have been good, but she had to know. Even if that knowledge ruined all the work she'd done to build herself back up. She finished bringing the food to the table and took her seat at its head, between Riku and Axel.

"This looks great. Thank you for dinner," Riku hummed happily as he helped himself to a large portion of Caesar salad.

Axel cut his eyes at him. "Try to save some for the rest of us, porky."

Kairi rolled her eyes. "I made enough to share, Axel. Play nice with your little friend."

"Little?" Riku gasped incredulously.

The dinner continued pleasantly. Kairi had prepared a healthy meal consisting of salad, glazed chicken, and fresh green beans. She was trying to expand Axel's diet beyond cereal and fast food. Besides, half his diet would need to change since Axel wouldn't be able to munch on Sora's stash anymore. She inwardly sighed; did every thought lead to Sora?

Yes, she knew he'd left her brutally, but he was Sora. She'd loved him for so long and with all her heart. She finished her plate and placed her fork and knife down. Riku was helping himself to seconds of chicken when she caught his eye. The air seemed to drain out of the room.

"Riku, you know what I want to ask," she began bravely, "Will you tell me?"

Riku set the serving plate of chicken back down and eyed Axel; the redhead met his gaze but remained silent. She wondered what they were hiding from her. Riku placed his hand on hers and let out a small sigh. "Sora is okay," he answered, "He hasn't opened up to me about what was happening between him and Naminé, so I don't have much to tell you."

She bit back her disappointment. Given how much Sora had changed, she should've expected him to give Riku the cold shoulder. "Has he…has he asked about me?"

Riku frowned. He seemed to be searching for the right words. "…Yes, but he's still seeing Naminé, Kai."

"O-Oh, of course, I should've expected as much," she stammered, feeling like she'd been punched in the gut. Kairi shot up from her chair. "I need a moment, excuse me."

She could hear Riku and Axel beginning to argue in hushed tones as she fled the room. She should've known Sora would still be with Naminé. She was silly to hope for anything different.


	23. Ladies Night

Kairi pouted from her spot on the couch. Axel had left to spend time with Roxas and Xion so she had the house to herself until tomorrow afternoon. She flipped through the television channels, frustrated that there were no interesting movies on. If she was being honest with herself, that wasn't the only reason she was frustrated.

It wasn't like Axel was a prisoner in her home. She had no reason to be angry with him or disappointed that he'd left her. Axel had been at her beck and call for longer than she'd like to admit. He deserved a break from her.

Instinctively, her mind drifted to Sora. He'd wanted a break from her too, hadn't he? Perhaps he'd cheated on her because she was so overbearing and obsessive about their marriage. She groaned and clicked off the television. "Come on, Kairi," she said to herself as she lightly smacked her cheeks, "You can't fall apart the day Axel is enjoying himself."

She heard the doorbell ring and raised a brow. The only visitor that ever came by was Riku and he hadn't mentioned stopping by that day. Curiously, she made her way to the front door and yanked it open. Instead of Riku, Olette and Xion were on the other side with their hands full of bags and smiles as large as them.

"Kairi!" Olette cried happily, "Surprise!"

Kairi's mouth fell open. "W-What are you guys doing here?" She stepped aside to allow them in.

Olette and Xion dropped their bags on the island counter, looking happy to have the weight out of their arms. Olette pulled Kairi into a tight hug before answering, "Axel set this all up!"

Kairi blinked and looked at Xion. "I thought he was with you and Roxas?"

Xion shook her head. "Nope, we all plotted to give you a girl's night. Axel and Roxas are picking up dinner for us. They'll stop by at some point and then leave us to the fun we have planned," she explained, "Are you surprised?"

Surprised wasn't enough to explain how she felt. Grateful. Elated. Excited? Was there a word that encompassed all of those feelings? It was like her entire world had brightened just by having Olette and Xion with her. And knowing that Axel had set this up to make her happy… she couldn't stop smiling.

Before she could think better of it, she'd pulled them into a three-way hug. "I'm so happy you're here!" she cried, "This is wonderful!"

Once she was released, Xion went to one of the bags and pulled out a box of chardonnay. "Shall we get started then, ladies?" she asked with a quirk of her eyebrow.

"I'll get us some glasses," Kairi replied happily.

Olette began to unpack the rest of the bags. She and Xion had brought all the essentials. Ice cream, nail polish in several shades, facial packs, board games, makeup, a curling iron, cheesy movies, cheese and crackers, and even cute, fuzzy socks.

Kairi set the glasses on the counter and admired the stash. "Wow, we've got everything!"

Xion began filling each glass with wine. "Yes, we're going to have tons of fun," she echoed. She paused and stared at the glass in her hand. It was filled halfway. She shrugged and then began filling it again. "And I mean lots."

Olette put the ice cream in the freezer. It was Kairi's favorite, strawberry. Xion handed Kairi a glass and she couldn't resist taking a sip. The wine was dry but the friendship that inspired it made it sweet.

"Well, what should we start with?" Kairi asked.

Xion smirked. "Getting tipsy to one of these chick flicks sounds good. What do you guys think? The Boathouse or Love Forever?" She held up the movie boxes for Olette and Kairi to see.

Olette giggled and grabbed her glass. "I haven't seen Boathouse!"

The women chatted merrily and made their way to the couch. Olette carried a plate of sliced cheese and crackers with her so they could munch and drink. Xion eyed the couch curiously before sitting on the left edge.

"What were you looking for?" Kairi asked as she sat beside her.

"The Axel-shaped dent you mentioned," she joked.

* * *

The movie ended and the ladies were full of wine and sappy love story. Olette suggested they put on their facials, so they changed into their pajamas and settled onto the carpet to apply each other's masks between sips of wine.

"Roxas will never admit this so don't tell him I told you, but he loves to do facials with me," Xion chuckled as she lightly smeared the green paste over Kairi's forehead. Xion cleared her throat and used her best Roxas imitation, "I just like the way it feels."

Olette laughed and squeezed some more paste onto her hand. She still had half of Xion's face left to cover. Kairi had already finished painting Olette. "How did you and Roxas meet?" Olette asked before covering Xion's cheek with goop.

Once the mask was spread away from her mouth, Xion answered, "Twilight U. We had the same biology class for non-majors. I actually met Axel in that class too. The three of us bonded over the difficulty of the class and how sweet ice cream tasted after a study session. At the end of the semester, Roxas asked me out. We went on a couple of dates and have been together ever since."

"How cute," Olette cooed.

Kairi opened her eyes once Xion finished applying the mask to her face. "You could be cute too, Olette. Hayner is still single," she teased with a wink.

The brunette shook her head. "I told you it's too weird!" she exclaimed, "I want to meet someone on my own. I actually may have met someone a few days ago…"

Xion finished her last gulp of wine. "Spill!" she demanded with a wave of the empty glass.

"There was this blonde guy walking down the street when I was getting a parking ticket. I told the officer I was right on time but he was still going to charge me anyway. The guy argued my case for me and I didn't have to pay anything," Olette told with a sigh, "He was so handsome and fierce."

"You didn't get his name?" Kairi questioned.

She shook her head. "No, he just winked at me and walked away. I hope I see him again!"

Kairi frowned. "Olette, you should've gotten his number! You can't leave things like that to chance."

Xion returned to the carpet with a full glass of wine. "And how are things with you and Axel?" she asked with a small smile, "I noticed that he hasn't moved out."

Kairi bit down on her lip. She'd been afraid someone would bring that up. "Oh, we're…we're fine," she answered, "Axel's great. I'm so thankful-"

Xion pointed her free hand at Kairi. "I may not know you very well but I can spot a lie a mile away. Cut the bullshit, Kairi. What's been going on with you two?"

"I agree with Xion. I noticed the chemistry the two of you had at the department party. Now, he's dedicated himself to you. Surely, you've thought about him  _like that_ ," Olette suggested. Kairi didn't miss the hopeful tone of her voice.

"I was just left by Sora. It's too soon for me to think about someone else," Kairi replied with a frown.

"But Sora didn't make you happy, Kairi. It was obvious to me that you were unhappy for such a long time when you were with him," Olette argued, "You deserve to be with someone that makes you happy. I just thought maybe Axel was that person."

Kairi tensed. She had been unhappy with Sora for a long time, years even. "It just doesn't feel right to move on so soon. Axel is great. He really is."

"But?" Xion questioned.

"There is no but. He's great and he's handsome and charming. I dream about him sometimes," Kairi admitted, "But then I think, how am I any different from Sora if I tried something with Axel?"

Xion furrowed her brows. "Kairi, you're way different. Sora cheated on you. You're single. You can do whatever you want and you don't owe Sora anything. Haven't you been loyal enough?"

She glanced at the ring that still rested on her finger. "Sora was everything to me…I just can't."

Olette pulled Kairi into a light hug. "Kai, you can't live this way. Sora let you down. You have to let him go. Has he tried to reach out to you?"

Kairi shook her head. "No, and whenever I ask Riku about him he doesn't have much to say."

"That should tell you that it's time. I know you loved him, but I hate to see you so miserable. Take this chance to be happy."

"And it doesn't have to be with Axel," Xion hastily added, "I just thought since you spent so much time with him there might be something going on between you two."

Kairi looked at her feet that were covered in fluffy, pink socks. She was grateful Olette and Xion had no idea how much she was squirming behind her mask. She hadn't ever talked about how things were with Axel. She'd been so obsessed with Sora that she'd spent most of her time pushing her thoughts of Axel to the side. Now Kairi wondered what it would feel like to shift her focus.

She drew a circle in her carpet and bravely announced, "There is something going on between us."

Xion cackled, "I knew it!"

"Ooh!" Olette cried, "I'll refill our cups, Kairi, then tell us everything!" She was back at Kairi's side in a flash.

"Well…that night I met you, Xion…I might've told him I was attracted to him and he might have told me he felt the same." She was afraid they would think badly of her since she'd still been with Sora at the time. It was scandalous, wasn't it? Instead, both women hugged her and laughed.

"I-I bet he tried to put the moves on you!" Xion howled before collapsing on her back. Luckily, her wine glass wasn't in her hand.

Kairi nodded and snorted, "He pinned me t-to a wall and said, 'What do you make of that, princess?'"

"He calls you princess? I'm never going to let him live that down!"

"It's because I wouldn't let him call me sweetheart," Kairi answered as she continued swirling her finger into the carpet, "He's been so great to me. When I was sick, he helped around the house. When things were bad with Sora, he was there to hold me. He makes me feel…special."

Kairi was startled by the sound of Olette's whine. "That's so sweet!" she cried, blinking back tears in her green eyes.

"Olette?"

She turned her head away and choked back a few more tears. "D-Don't mind me, I'm just drunk."

Xion giggled, "I think I am too. But I'm happy for you, Kairi."

Olette wiped at her eyes. "So, wait, why aren't the two of you together? It's obvious the guy is in love with you."

Kairi jumped to her feet. "In love with me?" she squeaked, "He is not!"

"He is, he is!" Xion and Olette sang.

Kairi frowned and snatched her wine glass from the floor. "You guys are mean. Stop teasing me like this," she whined before nervously gulping half the glass.

There was a bang on the door. Kairi jumped and spilled the rest of her glass on the front of her pink pajamas. The door burst open and Axel and Roxas marched in carrying two pizza boxes, a bag of salad, and a smaller box that said 'buffalo wings' on it.

Kairi's heart lurched at the sight of Axel's face. She could've easily thrown up. Her unease didn't stem from the possibility of Axel loving her; it was her own feelings that were twisting her intestines. It was too soon to think of love, wasn't it?

Axel set the boxes on the counter and then looked at Kairi. He raised a brow. "Why are you green and wet?"

Xion jumped up and answered for her. Much to her horror. "Your princess is doing a facial and just spilled wine all over herself because you pounded on the door like that!" she exclaimed as she hurried over to her husband. She kissed Roxas twice on the lips and the two began whispering sweetly to each other. Kairi envied how happy they looked together. Had she and Sora looked like that once?

"Ah, so you've been gossiping. No wonder you look so guilty. I bet the skin under that mask is as red as your hair," Axel teased, pulling her from her negative thoughts.

"N-No it's not," she stammered, "I'm perfectly pale!"

Axel rolled his eyes. "Best you could come up with?" She nodded.

"You two are so cute," Olette whispered in her ear. Kairi froze. Is that what she and Axel were together? Cute like Roxas and Xion? "Thank you so much for the food, Axel. I'm going to clean off this mask and I'll be back!" she announced before disappearing in the hall with a swish of her orange nightgown.

Axel approached Kairi and she carefully studied the movements of his body. Why was he suddenly oozing testosterone? She nearly fell against the wall when he finally stopped a few feet in front of her. He looked amused by her behavior but she wasn't going to give him the satisfaction of knowing he'd unnerved her.

"Thank you, Axel," she spoke carefully, "This has been a wonderful surprise."

He crossed his arms. "Is that your work voice? Why are you acting so weird?"

Kairi bit her lip again. If she kept doing that she was going to draw blood. "Uh…wine?"

"Right…Well, we'll leave you ladies to it then. I'll be back tomorrow afternoon to nurse your hangover," he joked with a wry smile. "Hopefully then you'll run and greet me with a hug like you do Riku."

Kairi smirked. "Are you jealous?"

"Me? Never! I just thought bringing food would get more of a reaction out of you than flowers."

"What were you hoping for?"

It was Axel's turn to smirk. It made her knees feel like jelly. "I'll show you later." He turned on his heels, grabbed Roxas by his arm, and was out the door. Xion giggled and locked it behind them.

"He's so into you," she declared with a wink.

Kairi gripped her wine glass. "I think I need a refill."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is one of my favorite chapters for sure. I really enjoyed writing Xion with some more spunk. Hope she didn't feel too OOC. I just think she might've been more like this without all the uh manipulation, heartbreak, and confusion? RIP Xion.


	24. Wanting

“Their house is just down this street,” Axel announced, steering Kairi to the right.

The pair were on their way to Roxas and Xion’s annual Halloween party. The couple had hosted one every year since they were married and Axel was always present. He was pleased to be able to bring Kairi with him this year.

“Are you sure I don’t look silly?” Kairi asked, messing with the frill on the skirt of her dress. Axel took the opportunity to give her another once over (he’d already eyeballed her twice). The costume she’d chosen was a sexier version of Strawberry Shortcake. Initially, Axel thought it was strange but once she’d emerged from her bedroom she’d had his full approval. She was dressed in a short, pink and white, puffed sleeve dress that barely covered to her mid-thigh. The front of the dress tied up like a corset giving him a nice view of her creamy cleavage. The skirt had layers of frill underneath that were exaggerated by her white fishnet and pink pumps. She’d topped it off with a cute, strawberry hat on her head. Sexy and adorable; Axel’s favorite combo.

He shook his head. “Silly is not the word I would choose, princess.”

Her hands were on her hips as she eyed him suspiciously. “Do I even want to know what word you’d choose?”

“Not if you expect it to be sweet or cute,” he teased. Truth was she was becoming harder and harder to resist. Now that she was single, Kairi seemed to have a ‘kiss me’ sign on her. Axel wasn’t sure how he managed to control himself around her most days. And he _had_ to control himself.

Axel was no fool. He knew Kairi would never speak to him again if she ever found out how he’d purposefully misled her about Sora’s intentions after her hospitalization. It wasn’t that he meant to harm her more, he just knew allowing Sora back in her life would be a mistake. Plus, Riku still hadn’t managed to crack the guy. Sora was a sinking ship and Axel wasn’t about to let Kairi go down with him.

Kairi fiddled with the ties at the front of her top. His eyes dropped to the inviting plushiness of her chest; he inwardly groaned. The costume wasn’t helping his determined resistance. He wondered if he even came close to having the same effect on her.

Axel had chosen to dress as a ‘sexy beast’; an original costume idea. He’d gone shirtless and added fur to an old pair of jeans. The look was completed with a bow tie and glue-on claws to his boots. Kairi said it was a cop out, but he believed it was genius.

They arrived at Roxas and Xion’s front door. Kairi rang the doorbell and they didn’t have to wait a minute before Xion popped out the doorway with a drink in her hand.

“Guys!” she slurred, “Welcome to the par-tay!”

Axel stifled a chuckle. Drunk Xion never failed to entertain. She urged them in, jingling after them in her garish, royal blue dress. He was not surprised to see the same decorations they used every year. Roxas and Xion had strung mini, pumpkin-shaped lanterns along the ceiling. He’d enjoyed the orange ambience the first three years, but now it felt played out. Jack-o-lanterns were spread out around the room and there was a cauldron perched on their kitchen counter.

It felt like there was no air in the room. The pair seemed to invite more people every year, but neglected to knock out a wall or two to accommodate the crowd. Axel placed his hand on the small of Kairi’s back as they walked toward the cloaked figure waving them forward. He had no doubt that it was Roxas underneath the black cloak and white mask.

Axel approached him and flicked the forehead of his mask. He heard Roxas grumble underneath it. “What are you supposed to be?” Axel questioned dryly.

Roxas lifted the mask and glared. “I could ask you the same.”

Xion bustled over, shoving drinks in Axel and Kairi’s hands. “Roxas is a murderer this year. A _lady_ killer if you want to be specific,” she giggled as she draped herself over him. Axel was always pleased to see his best friends so happy together, but there were times he wished they were less corny. Or perhaps he was simply regretting that he hadn’t thought to convince Kairi into a couple’s costume.

“Oh! And you’re the lady!” Kairi exclaimed, obviously pleased with herself.

Axel leaned down to her level and whispered, “Usually they come up with better costumes. This year is a dud.”

“I heard you!” Roxas cried, “And hey, we’re better than whatever you are. You look like an actor for a lint roller commercial.”

This made Kairi giggle. Axel frowned. “I’m a sexy beast! Isn’t that obvious?”

“Yes, _yes_ it is.”

The hairs on his back stood. Of course, she’d be here. Axel immediately glared at Xion and Roxas who feigned ignorance and began to slink away. Xion muttered something about making another batch of punch and needing Roxas to hold her jugs.  Axel wished he’d been able to comment on the innuendo.

He felt a hand brush against his back. Kairi was swiftly pushed past by the blonde woman who quickly maneuvered herself in front of him. She smiled viciously and raked her sharpened nails down his chest. “Axel, it’s been a while,” she growled seductively, “How have you been?”

Instead of granting the attention the blonde craved, his eyes drifted to Kairi. The redhead had stepped further away and was staring into her cup. Was she jealous? Was she bothered at all by Larxene’s tactless advances? If only he could read Kairi’s mind. He turned to Larxene and pried her hands away from his torso.

It was beyond his understanding why Roxas and Xion had invited her. She hadn’t changed at all in personality or appearance. Larxene still wore the same pixie haircut. Her eyes were the same venomous shade of blue and she hadn’t put on any weight. The latter was most obvious to him because she was practically naked in her so-called costume.

“Trust me, the distance between us was intentional,” he sneered. Larxene wasn’t perturbed at all; in fact, his insolence seemed to turn her on. She and Axel had once enjoyed the most casual of relationships a year ago, but he’d cut ties with her shortly after. Yes, she’d been fun to fool around with, however, there were some things even Axel was unwilling to do. “I’ve been fine.”

“Ooh, just fine, fireboy? Sounds like you need some more sparks in your life,” she suggested with a wink. Her blonde antennae-like bangs bobbed in her heavily made up face.

“Larxene, I think your display is making the entire room uncomfortable,” another familiar voice chastised behind him.

Axel turned and spotted Zexion on the couch with a beer in his hand. It’d been a while since Axel had seen him, not since the man had started his Ph.D. program at Radiant Garden University. Axel had only met him because he’d interned on and off at the research lab. He was impressed by how well he’d aged. Though, unsurprised that Zexion still wore half his gray hair in his face. Axel was unsure how he knew Roxas or Xion but was grateful to be saved nonetheless.

“Sexy Zex!” Axel cheered, stepping away from Larxene. Zexion groaned. “Thought I’d forgotten about your little closet incident?”

“I harbored no such thoughts,” he deadpanned.

“Are you here with her?”

Zexion’s expression remained unchanged. “She is apparently my plus one.” Suddenly, everything made sense. The woman had bullied her way into a party invitation.

Kairi’s voice called to him, “Axel-”

Larxene’s blonde head swung in the direction of Kairi. “And who is this tart?” she spat, “Look at how stupid she looks with a strawberry on her head!” Larxene laughed haughtily as though her voice’s volume was positively correlated with her superiority.  

Kairi looked bewildered. No doubt confused by Larxene’s abrasive personality. “This is Kairi,” Axel intervened with a wave of his hand, “’Fraid you messed up her costume, though. She’s here as a cake, not a tart.” Larxene glared. “Unless you meant to imply she was slutty, in which case, I believe no one can rival you there, Larx. What are you? A rejected underwear model?”

“Oh, shut up, Axel. You and your little girlfriend can kiss my ass for all I care!”

“G-Girlfriend?” Kairi gasped. Her cheeks were rosy. Perhaps she did have feelings for him, even if they were only slight. He hadn’t missed the fact she still wore her engagement ring. Every morning they shared breakfast, he struggled not to glare holes into her left hand. 

“Nice to see you too, Larx. I’m going to go chat with someone I actually enjoy speaking to now,” Axel announced as he began pushing Kairi toward the corner Hayner, Pence, and Olette were occupying. Kairi explained to him earlier that Olette had a serendipitous meeting with a man that turned out to be stapler boy. What Olette saw in the grumpy blonde was beyond Axel.

“Who was that?” Kairi asked. The tone of her voice made him wince.

“An ex of sorts.”

Kairi raised her eyebrows. “You dated her?”

Axel was almost ashamed. Almost. “She can be very nice when she wants to be.”

She scoffed, “Yeah, I bet she was real _friendly_ with you.”

He hummed his surprise. “Whoa, princess. Better watch out or your new costume will be Green Apple Envy and not Strawberry Shortcake.”

“What, I’m not jealous!”

Axel purposefully ignored her, relishing in this new discovery. “Yo!” he greeted the trio, “And what in the worlds are you all supposed to be?”

Olette grinned and answered proudly, “I’m Irene Adler. Hayner is Sherlock. And Pence is Watson!” Of course they’d chosen to go as a trio instead of a pair. It was obvious to Axel that Olette was still too bashful to commit to a duo situation. He wondered how far that hesitance extended, but he wasn’t about to pry into that. He didn’t care that much. It wasn’t his problem if Hayner couldn’t perform.

“I think you all look great,” Kairi complimented with a sip of her drink.

Axel peered into her cup and noticed it was already halfway gone. He glanced into his own cup. Looks like he had some catching up to do and not just in drinking. Axel wondered if he would ever be able to catch up to Sora in Kairi’s heart.

* * *

 

Several drinks later and everyone was having a good time, Axel included. The music and bass were blaring. Roxas and Xion had cleared out their furniture and made a makeshift dancefloor in the living room. Kairi, of course, had insisted that he dance with her. He was happy to oblige, taking the opportunity to press her against him liberally; she didn’t seem to mind. Larxene, on the other hand, did mind, and went out of her way looking ridiculous with every other male at the party. She’d even bothered Roxas which earned her a stern ‘talking to’ from Xion.

None of it mattered to Axel, though. He let himself be consumed in the strawberry princess dancing against him. He didn’t know which was more intoxicating, her body or the strong cocktail Xion had brewed in her plastic cauldron. He was seeing stars.

Axel paused. Actually, he probably just needed some air.

He let his hand trail down to Kairi’s. She looked up at him, her eyes relaying her questions. He nodded his head toward the sliding door that led to Roxas and Xion’s deck. She agreed and they went outside. He’d never had a more refreshing gulp of air.

He leaned against the wooden railing that Roxas had built himself after Xion had stumbled off the edge during the Halloween Party two years ago. The pair had a nicely sized backyard that was well kept and abundant in flowers. He never would’ve guessed Roxas and Xion had green thumbs when they went to Twilight U together. Life was full of surprises.

“You okay?” Kairi asked. Despite hours of dancing and drinking, she still looked flawless.

He poked the large strawberry on her head and smiled. “I’m perfect, princess. You?”

She took in a deep breath of her own. “Better now. It was getting a little stuffy in there, huh?” She shuffled on her feet and stumbled. Axel caught her before she could fall, enjoying the velvety feel of her skin underneath his fingertips. He found himself caressing her arms before he realized what he was doing.

“Axel?”

Snapping out of his stupor, he stepped away. “Guess I’m more than a little drunk,” he chuckled, “Sorry. I’m going to sit down.” Putting some distance between them was a wise idea. He wasn’t sorry he’d touched her. In fact, he wanted nothing more than to touch her more and in places that were currently concealed by her little dress. His hopes of calming down were dashed when she sat next to him. Kairi crossed her legs and his eyes were drawn to the new skin revealed by the lift of her skirt.

Axel closed his eyes and leaned against the back of the patio sofa they shared. He tried to concentrate on something other than Kairi. His efforts were dashed again when she leaned against him. He could smell her and she did smell as sweet as her personality.

“Let me know when you want to go back inside, okay?” she offered with a happy hum.

If Axel had been wearing a shirt, he would’ve tugged at it. He was suddenly very warm, warmer than he’d been inside the house. How was it that she had no idea what effect she had on him?

“Kairi, let’s have a heart to heart,” he suggested, eyes still closed.

“Okay. What is it?”

He felt his way to her left hand and tapped the jewel on her engagement ring. “Why do you still wear it?”

She remained silent. If Axel hadn’t been holding her hand, he might’ve thought she’d gone back inside. “Old habits die hard,” she whispered, “I can’t seem to take it off.”

He opened his eyes. She was looking down at the ring, obscuring his view of her face. He didn’t doubt she was frowning, though. She always frowned when she thought of Sora.

“Do you still love him?” Axel froze. He wasn’t sure he wanted to hear the answer to that. He hadn’t forgotten what Sora had declared during their fight: _‘She’ll come back to me. I know she will.’_  

“I-I don’t know. Part of me says yes and part of me says no. We were together for so long. It’s not easy to just forget about him.”

“Kairi, I need to tell you something.” Axel took in a deep breath. _What am I doing?_  “Kairi, forget Sora and let me take care of you.” Her head jerked up. If her eyes could’ve fallen out of her head, they would’ve. Axel had never seen her look so shocked.

She couldn’t seem to say a word. Kairi just looked at him as though he’d transformed into a monster. Was the thought of being with him so horrifying? The silence between them was thick as molasses. He’d just put up his heart for the taking and instead of being received, it was hanging in suspense. It was too much for him.

Axel was not a patient man. He was typically not even a tender man, but somehow, Kairi had found a soft spot in his heart and stayed there. He couldn’t deny how he loved her. As much as it scared him, he had begun imagining what a life with her would be like. He was just as hopeless as she was.

“Axel, I don’t know what to say,” she finally whispered.

Had he really been expecting anything else? Kairi was the definition of loyal.  He was sure her face was the picture example in the dictionary. For some reason, she’d chosen to bestow the best of her loyalty onto Sora even after his betrayal.

“Don’t say anything then.” He lifted her chin. He could see the unshed tears sparkling in her irises. “I’ll keep talking for us both. I feel more than attraction for you, Kairi. I’m no Sora but that might be a good thing.” She didn’t look away from him; he liked that. She also didn’t seem to have anything else to say, which allowed his mind to wander through possibilities. Would she turn away if he tried anything? How good would it feel if she didn’t?

He let out a sigh, that came out as more of a growl. “If you don’t get away from me, I’m going to kiss you.”

Her face reddened but she didn’t move. Axel found this curious. Did she want him to kiss her? His heart began to pound at the thought. He’d had several dreams involving Kairi and kisses. So many that he wondered daily what her real lips felt like.

Axel dared to move his face closer to hers. He was so close he could sense how smooth her cheeks were. If she truly wanted to kiss him, she was going to have to close the distance between them.

“What’s it going to be, Kairi?”

She closed her eyes but she didn’t move closer to him. The tension was killing him. Her luscious, pink lips were a breath away. Any man would cave under the pressure, but lucky for Kairi, Axel wasn’t just any man. He wasn’t about to do anything that would risk him losing her.

He pulled away from her abruptly and shoved his hands in his pant’s pockets. The spell he had over Kairi seemed to be broken. She found her voice, but didn’t dare move closer to him. “Axel?”

He smirked despite himself. “You got lucky this time, princess. I won’t let you escape twice.”

“Is that a threat or a promise?” Her boldness caught him off guard.

He didn’t have to think twice about his answer. “It’s a promise.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please keep in mind the mature rating of this fic before you read on. It will be starting to live up to the rating shortly.


	25. Dessert

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Maturity Rating Warning!

The holidays were just around the corner. Kairi was in a busy haze trying to buy presents for friends and family. Between work and shopping, she'd hardly had time to take a moment to herself. The only things that kept her grounded were her weekly lunches with Olette and Xion (a tradition they started after their successful girl's night) and Axel.

He still hadn't moved out of the townhome. In fact, he'd taken over more responsibilities. There were nights when Kairi came home and found that he had already cooked dinner for the two of them. Axel had also picked up some housekeeping chores, like vacuuming, buying groceries on his way home, and cleaning the kitchen after dinner. She appreciated his help and wanted to express her gratitude appropriately.

It was the word 'appropriately' that had her hung up. She'd almost kissed him Halloween night, but she'd held back. Kairi didn't want to start anything with Axel under the influence of alcohol. She felt it was cheap and he meant much more to her than that. That wasn't to say that she discounted his confession. On the contrary, she believed Axel truly meant what he said.

There wasn't a day that went by that she didn't think of how close he'd been to her without blushing and squirming. She tried to hold onto that feeling every morning when she thought about taking off her engagement ring. Even with the extra emotional encouragement, she still hadn't succeeded.

She hovered over the stove, finishing off the meal she'd prepared. The ring glistened under the stove light, taunting her with how beautiful it looked. Sora had chosen the ring especially for her; she was reminded of this fact every time she thought to take it off.

Kairi checked the oven clock. It was nearly 6:30 PM and Axel would be home any minute. She'd texted him earlier that day to ask because she wanted to surprise him with a nice dinner. It was the best way she could think of to say thank you, and slip in the idea of bringing him to Destiny Islands for Christmas.

It was a big step but she felt ready. She trusted Axel with her life. She wanted to show him how important he was to her. And maybe she also wanted to cash out on the promise he made to her. She blushed at the thought.

Kairi finished setting the table just as Axel walked in. She beamed at him as he ripped off his tie.

"Is the power out?" he asked, not noticing the setup on the table. She'd set their plates, the food she'd cooked, and lit the room with three white candles that rested on the dining table. The meal was something she looked up online: honey-glazed salmon, broccoli spears, and garlic potatoes.

Kairi giggled as recognition lit his eyes. He stood at her side and studied the table. "This is why you asked when I was coming home, isn't it, princess?" he questioned with a slight smirk, "You wanted to surprise me."

She nodded eagerly. "Yes, please sit down."

He plopped down in a chair and she handed him a glass of champagne. Axel sniffed it curiously before taking a sip. "Hm, not bad," he commented before setting it on the table. Kairi poured her own glass and settled down in the chair adjacent to his. "So, what's the occasion?" Instead of answering immediately, Kairi was distracted as he undid the top buttons of his shirt and rolled up sleeves. She felt like a hormonal teenager again as her eyes soaked in the angles of his muscles.

"I wanted to show how grateful I am to have you here," Kairi eventually explained. She grabbed his plate and began serving him. She delighted in how he watched her. It was hard for her to believe that there was a time his eyes had given her anxiety.

"Thanks, princess."

She smiled, happy to be appreciated for her hard work. "There's actually something else I wanted to talk to you about," she began as she watched Axel tear into the tender salmon.

He smirked. "Ah, so there is a catch."

Kairi shook her head. "Not like what you might think," she explained, "What are you doing for the holidays?"

He shrugged. "Once my classes end, I have no plans."

"Not going to see family?"

He shook his head and answered between bites, "No one to visit."

She frowned. Now that she bothered to think more about it, Kairi had never asked him about his family. "Oh, really? No other Fierro's in Radiant Garden?"

He looked up from his plate. "My parents are dead and I'm an only child. There are no other Fierro's in Radiant Garden. I'm not aware of any distant relatives either."

Her hand found its way to her heart. She had no idea Axel was alone in the world. Or maybe she did, judging by the employment and living situations he'd found himself in. "I didn't know."

He shrugged. "It's not something I willingly discuss." He raised a brow. "Don't feel bad, princess. They croaked a long time ago. Doesn't bother me anymore."

She paused. Was her request inconsiderate now? She didn't want to flaunt her family in front of him. She bit down on her lip. Maybe it would be better if they both stayed in Twilight Town together.

"Spit it out."

"Uh…I was going to ask you if you wanted to come with me to Destiny Islands for the holidays," she confessed hesitantly, "But it's okay if you-"

He silenced her with a smile. "I'll go."

Her heartbeat quickened. "Really?"

"Sure, it's about time I meet the King and Queen, don't you think?"

Kairi rolled her eyes. "You know I'm not an actual princess, right? Don't expect anything lavish. It is an island."

"You're a princess in my eyes, Kairi. That's all that matters." She blushed and quickly shoved food in her mouth to excuse herself from speaking. He laughed at her. "Then again, you eat like an animal so I can't be sure my opinion won't change."

She stuck out her tongue at him. "Just enjoy my cooking!" she demanded, "But not too much. I also have dessert." The gleam in his eyes at the mention of dessert was more mischievous than she expected. What was he thinking that she meant by dessert? The possibilities made her stomach fluttery.

Axel seemed to quicken his pace. He'd finished his plate before Kairi even ate half of hers. She gaped at him. Had he even chewed?

"So where's this dessert you spoke of?" he asked with a smirk.

Kairi popped another bite of broccoli into her mouth and then hopped out of her chair. "Oh, um, let me grab it from the fridge," she announced. She had a strange feeling in the pit of her stomach. There was something different about the way he was looking at her.

Before she'd even reached the refrigerator, Axel had grabbed her from behind. She shrieked; her screams quickly turning to laughter as he hoisted her over his shoulder. "Put me down!" she cried, lightly kicking her legs as he casually walked the distance to his room.

He slung her down on his bed and Kairi was grateful the lights were off. She was sure her face was completely scarlet. He plopped down beside her and pulled her into his arms. Despite her erratic heartbeat, she managed to settle and nestle her head in his chest.

The last time she'd cuddled him had been in this bed. The bittersweet memory flooded her with warm feelings. She'd missed his embrace more than she'd realized. However, as nice as the moment was, she had to interrupt and point out, "Axel, I thought you wanted dessert?"

He pulled away from her slightly. "Wait, you actually made dessert?" The moonlight illuminated the shocked look in his eyes.

"Yes?"

He released her. "Oh…I thought you meant-I'm sorry, princess," he muttered with a nervous chuckle, "I don't know what got into me." Axel turned to swing his legs out of the bed, but Kairi grabbed his arm and pulled him back down. "Okay, now you're sending me mixed messages."

Kairi bit her lip. "I did make dessert but-"

"Stop doing that."

She blinked. "Doing what?"

"Biting your lip, stop that."

She hesitated, "Can I ask why?"

"You're making me jealous."

Kairi felt as though someone had shoved her into a sauna. Sweat crept across her skin, but it only strengthened her resolve. She was going to go through with this. She was going to tell him how she felt. She opened her mouth to confess but it came out as a squeak, and instead, she buried her head in his chest. A fresh wave of embarrassment washed over her as she gripped him tightly.

"This is a first," he replied casually, "It sounds like a cat really does have your tongue." His long fingers stroked her back through her violet, turtleneck sweater.

She took a deep breath, catching the scent of his cologne. It was now or never. "Axel, I've thought a lot about what you told me on Halloween," she began shakily, "And I-I want to make good on your promise."

"Look at me, Kairi." She complied. His eyes were so soft they gave her shivers. "Tell me what you want me to do."

If heads could explode, Kairi's would have. She swallowed some nervous saliva. This was the moment she'd daydreamed about. It was time to see if reality would be just as wonderful. "I want you to kiss me."

"I can do that," he darkly chuckled.

Axel's hands swept up her back and cradled her neck. He leaned over her, placing his leg between hers. The way his knee brushed her skin had her shivering again. He placed a light kiss on her forehead before shifting his attention to her lips. He hesitated, an inch away, and simply watched her. She groaned with impatience.

"Are you sure?" he whispered.

Kairi smiled. "I'll prove it to you." She reached around his back and plucked her engagement ring from her finger. She brought it to his eye level so he could see. "I'm sure."

Axel let out a guttural noise before fiercely pressing his lips to hers. Her engagement ring dropped to the floor somewhere as she wrapped her arms around him. He ravaged her lips. Months of pent up tension oozed out of her in moans and desperate squeezes. His tongue slid across the surface of her bottom lip. She let him explore further, growing restless with desire. She wanted to feel more of him. Instinctively, her thighs clamped around his leg. He responded with a groan, freeing one hand from her neck to squeeze her butt.

He broke their kiss and smirked. "I can't tell you how long I've wanted to do that." Kairi was breathless. All she could do was gasp for air and study the way his tattoos brought out his eyes. "You all right, sweetheart?"

She nodded. "Please keep calling me that."

"Sweetheart?"

"Yes, that."

He licked his lips. "Oh, so it's not harassment anymore?" She shook her head. "What else do you want then, sweetheart?"

Kairi unraveled her hands from his body and reached for his shirt buttons. He watched with a smile as she undid every button and tugged for him to take it off. He obliged her and let the shirt fall to the floor. Kairi lightly placed her hands on his hard chest, allowing them to caress down to his belly button as she'd angrily watched Larxene do. She'd enjoyed the eye full she'd gotten at the Halloween party, but she had been too cowardly to touch him herself. Now she had no reason to resist.

She lifted her head and placed a gentle kiss on his Adam's apple and several more across the length of his collarbone. She paused on his right shoulder, daring to brush her tongue against his skin. He tasted delicious. She met his eyes, reveling in the effect she had on him.

Axel dropped his other hand to her waist and rolled her on top of him. She repositioned her legs so that she was straddling his hips. He motioned toward the hem of her sweater with his eyes. She eagerly complied and lifted it over her head and off her arms.

"That's a nice little lace number," he complimented.

She blushed, strangely embarrassed by compliments on her bra despite all that had transpired. "I didn't plan it," she argued, "I didn't know how far this would go…"

"I look forward to seeing something you planned then." He winked. Axel hoisted himself up, leaning against the headboard of the bed. Kairi steadied herself on his shoulders moving toward him for another kiss. He evaded her lips and went straight for her neck. She gasped as he began to vigorously suck and lick between her chin and shoulder. His hands gripped her hips and pulled her into his pelvis, letting her rub against the hardness of his pants.

She struggled to maintain any sense of composure. Axel felt good, dangerously good. There was no doubt in her mind she'd succumb to his ardor if she didn't pull away soon. But how could she? He kissed his way back to her mouth and lightly bit her plush, bottom lip. Kairi ached with pleasure.

He ghosted kisses across her cheek, allowing his lips to hover next to her ear. "What else do you want, sweetheart?"

Her answer was a hungry moan. She laced her fingers through his spikes and pulled his face to her wanting mouth. They kissed wildly. She was slipping away, losing herself in the motions of his tongue. Her own hips burned to grind against Axel's lap. It took all of her willpower to pull away before she lost control.

"Axel," she breathed, "I have to stop."

He pulled back. "Are you okay?"

She nodded and rested her forehead against his. "Yes, I'm fine. I just don't want to get ahead of myself."

"As you wish."

Axel was so understanding, so patient. She wondered how he could be that way. Kairi gave him one, last chaste kiss and then crawled off him. She missed him as soon as she'd moved away, but she knew she was right. It would be a mistake to sleep with Axel now. She didn't want to jeopardize everything by moving too quickly.

She hopped off the bed and pulled her skirt back down to her knees; it had hiked up her thighs.

Kairi glanced around the room, squinting in the darkness to find her sweater. She thought if she turned the light on, the magic of what happened might be broken.

"Kairi."

She turned her head and found his mouth on hers once more. The surprise made the contact even more tantalizing. He kissed her with such fervor it made her legs buckle. She nearly tumbled down, but Axel held her firm, bending over to strengthen his kiss. As quickly as he'd moved in, Axel pulled away with a knowing look.

"I like being able to do that to you," he whispered. She had no words. He looked even more pleased by her speechlessness. "Oh, and here's your shirt, sweetheart." He tossed it to her easily but she barely caught it. "Now, tell me about this dessert."

Kairi had completely forgotten about the pie waiting in her fridge.


	26. Vulnerability

"Done!" Kairi cheered from her cubicle.

She'd finished her last task and was officially on holiday break. She eagerly popped up from her chair and stretched her arms in the air. It felt so good to be off. It felt even better knowing that she and Axel were going to be on a gummi ship tomorrow morning to spend the holidays on Destiny Islands. She smiled to herself. Kairi couldn't wait to introduce him to the aunt and uncle she'd been raised by. She knew they would love him…as soon as they got past his tattoos and alternative wardrobe.

She was the last one to leave the office. Even Hayner and Pence had already called it a night. Kairi glanced at the clock and gasped. It was almost 7 PM. Had she really worked so late?

Her phone began to buzz in her purse. She quickly yanked it out and saw that Axel was calling. She answered as she made her way to the elevator.

_"_ _You planning on coming home, sweetheart?"_

Kairi pressed the button for the ground floor. "Yes!" she giggled, "I'm sorry it took me so long. I just noticed how late it was. I'll be home soon. I'm in the elevator now."

_"_ _Good, I need your help packing. I'm having a hard time deciding which temporary tattoo would match my studded, leather jacket. The upside down cross or the flaming skull."_

She rolled her eyes. "Ha. Ha. I'm going through your suitcase as soon as I'm home. I want my Aunt and Uncle to like you, not fear you."

_"_ _That's the same thing, isn't it?"_

She stifled a laugh. "Stop playing around! I'll see you soon, okay? Should I pick up anything on the way home?"

_"_ _Nah. I made dinner. See you soon."_

Kairi said her goodbye and hung up the phone. She sighed happily as she gripped it in her hand. The world felt right again. Everything was going as planned. Axel would blow her family away with his wit and charm and they'd have a wonderful holiday. She pushed through the front doors of her office building, surprised by how ominous the clouds looked.

Her eyes fell from the sky to the familiar man waiting outside the doors. She froze as their eyes met.

"Sora?"

He meekly smiled and waved a hand before hurrying toward her. He wore a black, wool hat over his messy spikes that matched the long, thick winter coat covering his body. His nose was red and his skin appeared chilled.

"Kairi, hey," he greeted, "I was beginning to think you'd taken the day off."

She backed away from him. "Sora, have you been waiting for me?" He nodded. Kairi couldn't help but notice the small bags under his reddened eyes. He looked as though he hadn't been well. She shook off her desire to worry and added, "You shouldn't have done that."

"Kai, wait-"

"No, I won't. I have somewhere to be. I'm done waiting for you!" she cried, harsher than intended. She hated how he recoiled from her words. It still hurt to hurt him, but she couldn't let herself fall into the same pattern. She steeled herself and moved to walk past him. He grabbed her arm and stopped her.

"Just give me five minutes," Sora begged.

Kairi grimaced and shook her head. "No, please, let go."

She could see the tears beginning to form in his cerulean eyes. Why was he acting this way? They hadn't had any contact since he'd come home, lied to her face, and seduced her. He had no reason to react so emotionally.

Sora sunk down to the ground, taking her hands in his. "Please, Kairi. If you ever loved me, please just hear me out." She was reminded of the way she'd pleaded for him to marry her. Kairi hesitated. The way he'd treated her then had broken her heart. She couldn't allow herself to do the same to him.

Knowing she'd regret it, she muttered, "Fine. But I'm not going to stand in the cold and talk to you. We can go to the coffee shop over there." She indicated the shop with a point of her finger. It was called 'Golden Brew' and she was going to need one of their hot chocolates to get through this conversation.

Sora hopped to his feet, nearly slipping on the ice covering the sidewalk. He played it off with a chuckle and pulled her toward the shop with his gloved hand. She hated how familiar the situation felt. Kairi didn't want to remember the wonderful times they'd shared together. She just wanted to go home.

He held open the door for her and she felt much better standing in the heated shop. There weren't many patrons seated at the black, iron tables. No doubt most people were already in the comfort of their homes. Even the baristas looked like they wanted to be somewhere else, which was unusual, the staff was normally energetic.

"I'll buy you whatever you want," Sora offered with a grin.

"A hot chocolate, please. I'll be over there." She pointed to a table in the corner of the shop. He nodded and hurried to the register to place their order.

Kairi settled into the chair closest to the door and glanced out the frosty window. She eyed the sky again wearily; it looked like it could rain or snow at any moment. She needed to get home or Axel was going to worry about her. They weren't together  _together_ , but she was realizing that she wanted to be. Hopefully, this meeting wouldn't tear a rift between them.

Sora sat across from her and slid her the hot chocolate. "I got the same thing," he announced, "You always said this place had good hot chocolate."

Kairi nodded, blowing into her cup. "I'm surprised you remember anything I said."

He looked crestfallen. "Kai, I know I can't change what happened-"

"No, you can't change that you lied to me, to Riku, and that you completely betrayed me."

He sighed. "I know I let you down." Kairi felt her body beginning to tremble. She gripped the warm cup in her hands tighter. She couldn't let Sora see her cry. "I'm so sorry I hurt you. I know you don't believe me but I am."

She bit back her tears. "You didn't even see me after I was in the hospital. You just took your stuff and disappeared!"

"Wait a minute…Kairi-"

Kairi shook her head. "No, I don't want to hear it. You were a coward."

He hesitated. She was proud to have the upper hand for once. "…You're right. I was a coward. And you deserve an explanation. Let me give it to you."

She took in a deep breath. Kairi wasn't sure she wanted to hear Sora's explanation. What else could he say but that he'd fallen out of love with her and in love with Naminé? Did she really want to hear how Sora had decided between the two of them? She grit her teeth, prepared to tell him off and leave, but the look in his eyes stopped her. The vulnerability and desperation gripped at her heart. She grumbled, "Okay, you have three minutes."

His countenance brightened considerably. Sora straightened his spine and shifted in his chair until he was comfortable. "Kairi, I was an idiot and I took you for granted," he began with the most serious expression she'd ever seen on his face, "You always told me how kind and supportive and giving I am and I've always wanted to live up to that in your eyes. I wanted to be a man worthy of you." His eyes fell to his hot chocolate. "Naminé was someone I befriended because I'd taken your words to heart. She was so quiet and scared, I just wanted her to feel comfortable when she was new to the department. I felt like she needed a friend."

Kairi frowned. He really was going to tell her how he fell in love with the art therapist.

"I never told you about this, but one day I found her crying in the break room," he hesitated, "You see…she had been dating this abusive guy named Marluxia and she needed help. I promised her that I would never let her be hurt again."

It was getting harder for her to control her urge to cry. "What about our promise, Sora?" she found herself asking, "Did you forget about it?"

He rubbed the back of his neck. "I kinda used it to justify what I was doing. I knew you would wait for me because I'd always come back to you." He paused to frown. "But I was so stupid and couldn't see how that was pulling us apart. What was supposed to bring us together was my excuse to delay our wedding for years, and to justify placing anything and everything before you. You were right to accuse me of that, Kai. I took advantage of your kindness and loyalty."

Kairi never thought Sora would be so open with her about his misgivings. It was both cathartic and painful.

"Kai, one day I found Naminé crying again. I rushed to her side and found out I was the reason. I-I don't know what came over me, Kairi! I never meant to do this…but I  _had_  to keep my promise," he confessed. A tear rolled down his tanned cheek. "I don't know how it happened, but I lost myself, I lost us. Naminé made me forget about everything you meant to me. It's like the closer I got to her, the less I thought about you. It was like being stuck in a bad dream."

Her lips tightened to a line. "Sora, this is starting to sound like a bunch of excuses."

He shook his head. "No, listen to me, please. I know this sounds crazy but it's the truth! Naminé makes me a different person, I can't explain it. You know me, Kairi, I never lie or deceive people intentionally. But half the time I said I was working, I was with her. That trip to Radiant Garden wasn't even for me, it was for her."

"Sora-"

He shook his head again and sniffled. "Riku started making comments about me spending too much time with Naminé, and I was afraid he'd mention it to you. So, I started lying to him too, about you being busy when he asked to come over. I-I even told him we'd started going to counseling just to make up more reasons why he couldn't visit."

Kairi clamped her eyes shut. "Sora, I don't want to hear anymore."

Sora kept talking, it was like he couldn't stop himself. "I just wanted to protect her." He placed his hand on his heart. "She took control of my heart…I-I thought I could keep it up until she changed her mind-"

"I can't take this, Sora!" she cried, biting down on her lip to stop herself from sobbing. Her heart was breaking again. How could Sora have forgotten their love? She'd given him her good luck charm to remind him when they weren't together. She paused. Was that what it was? "Sora, where is my charm?"

His face fell. "Kairi…I lost it."

Kairi leapt from her seat. "You lost it!" she shrieked. In a moment of pure fury, she raised her hand to slap him, but paused mid-swing. Through her own tears, she could see him crying, waiting to be hit. She clutched her hand to her chest and turned away. "Goodbye, Sora."

She fled the coffee shop, not bothering to take the hot chocolate with her. Which she soon regretted, her hands seemed to immediately freeze in the weather outside.

Snow had begun falling from the sky; she could feel the moist drops seeping into her uncovered hair. She skidded to a halt a few shops away, pausing to recollect herself and wipe her eyes. How could he lose the symbol of their love? How could he have placed another woman before her?

"I truly mean nothing to him now," she whispered, letting the words sink into her heart.

"Kairi, that's not true!"

Her eyes widened as he fell against the wall beside her. He was breathing deeply, looking panicked. Kairi hated that she still worried for him.

"Y-You mean everything to me. I forgot but I won't again," he vowed. Sora dared to grab her hands and look into her eyes. "I messed up, bad. I know I don't deserve your forgiveness, but I can't live without you. You're my light in the darkness, Kairi. I love you."

If only he'd said those words to her months earlier, she might've fallen for it. She snatched her hands from his grasp and shoved them in her jacket pockets. "Sora, nothing is going to change my mind."

He'd begun to flounder, she could tell. Perhaps he hadn't expected such a struggle. "You're going home for the holidays, right?" he asked hopefully.

"…Yes."

"Kairi, I will wait for you from two until sunset at the secret place every day. If you just come once, I swear we'll work this out."

Why was he doing this to her? She studied his face carefully. She could see the agony underneath the snowflakes gathering in his eyelashes, but it wasn't enough for her. Looking at Sora was like looking at a faded dream. She wasn't sure she could ever return to him, no matter how much she loved him.

"I have to go, Sora. You shouldn't wait for me."

"I will wait for you because you're special to me. You're worth waiting for, okay?" He took a step back. For a moment, he looked like the cheery boy she remembered. He grinned at her briefly before turning and running back down the bleak, icy sidewalk.

Kairi rubbed her arms, shivering from the cold. His words haunted her. She remembered when she'd told Axel the same thing; that Sora was worth it. She clutched her purse tightly and began walking through the snowfall to where she'd parked. The usual, rich browns of Twilight Town were quickly becoming blanketed in gray and white.

She slipped into her car and turned on the heater. While she waited for the engine to warm up, Kairi pulled her phone from her bag. She wasn't surprised to see she'd missed a call from Axel.

The world didn't feel so perfect anymore.


	27. Moving Forward

The time spent in Destiny Islands was harder than Kairi ever imagined. What was supposed to be a relaxing getaway had become an uncomfortable stay.

Axel and her relatives didn't get along, at all. She expected it would take a day or two for them to get used to each other. After all, Kairi had been slow to warm to Axel. However, it looked like her Aunt and Uncle were going to be even slower. Between her Aunt questioning her about the nature of their relationship and her Uncle demanding she send him home, she was losing her mind. Axel, thankfully, had managed to be more level-headed about their various disagreements, but she could tell he was reaching his limit. It would only take one more 'dangerous' or 'freak' comment to set Axel off on a tirade.

It didn't help that she and Axel hadn't had a single moment to be alone. Her Uncle had been watching them like a hawk. It seemed like every time Axel was able to get close to her, her Uncle was there calling her away or watching them disapprovingly. It was unnerving her. He'd never acted that way when she'd brought Sora home.

Sora was a sore subject on his own. When she'd told Axel about her meeting with Sora, he'd been furious. She'd never seen Axel so angry. She couldn't blame him either. Why would he like the man that had broken her heart? On the other hand, her Uncle and Aunt had been thrilled and had kicked her out of the house every afternoon in hopes she'd paddle over. And naturally, Axel hadn't been allowed to accompany her. Every time he moved to go with her, her Aunt had some household task she needed his help with. Since Axel didn't know the layout of the island, her Uncle insisted he wait at home for his own "safety", because apparently the island had become dangerous. Kairi's eyes were hurting from all the eye rolls.

She stood on the beach at the edge of the clear water, staring out at the small island in the distance. She could visualize the smooth rocks they'd scribbled on in the Secret Place. If she thought hard enough, she could even smell the place's familiar, musty odor. It'd once been a haven to her, but now it felt like a trap. There wasn't an hour that went by, on the beach or at home, without her thinking of Sora's words.

It was hard for her to believe that Sora loved her. He'd had a secret relationship with another woman for a considerable amount of time. If he were truly in love with her, he would not have done that. If he'd truly loved her, he would have never forgotten her. She wished he'd just left her alone; Kairi didn't need this stress.

"Kairi."

She tucked a piece of red hair behind her ear as she turned toward the sound of Riku's voice. He was walking across the sand, dressed in his island clothes. It'd been a long time since she'd seen him in his baggiest, blue jeans and yellow vest.

"Riku, you came."

He stopped next to her and focused his gaze on the island as well. Somehow, it hadn't changed at all from when they were children.

"Have you heard from him?" Riku questioned with crossed arms. Kairi shook her head. He sighed, "I wish he would've told me he was going to see you…"

She placed a hand on his arm. "It's okay, Riku. You said he wasn't talking to you. I can't expect you to predict his actions, especially since he's been acting so strange."

"I'm his best friend, Kai. I know Sora like the back of my hand. At least, I thought I did."

Kairi frowned. She hated to see Riku so distraught. Her beloved friend looked even more exhausted than the last time she'd seen him. The dark circles around his eyes had deepened. He even looked like he'd lost a few pounds. "Riku, please don't blame yourself," she whispered, "Neither of us could have predicted this. I knew Sora cared deeply for others, I just never thought he'd use his heart as an excuse to cheat on me."

The man beside her shook his head. "I can't believe him. His hero complex is out of control."

She raised a brow. "The two of you loved to think of yourselves as heroes. Are you taking it back now?"

"That's not what I meant, Kai. There's a difference between playing hero and carrying the burden of a hero. Sora has always burdened himself for as long as I've known him. He hasn't grown out of it and now look at him. You can't be everyone's hero without losing yourself in the process."

His words weighed on her. Is that what had happened to Sora? He'd pushed himself to the point where he was unrecognizable? She frowned. Kairi had always told him how selfless and giving he was. Did that make this her fault for pushing the idea on him since they were young?

She shook her head. She didn't make him fall into Naminé's arms. He chose to. "All we can do is try to move forward."

"How do you plan to move forward?"

She hesitated. Her eyes drifted back to the island. She could perfectly picture Sora waiting on the dock, his feet dangling over the water as he stared out to the horizon. Sora's eyes always looked beautiful in the colors of the sunset. She'd spent many sunsets with him on that wooden dock, sharing secrets and stealing kisses.

"I'm not going to the island," she vowed, "I can't go back to him, Riku. Not after this. Not after he chose Naminé over me. I forgive him and I still care about him, but I won't ever be able to forget everything that happened between us. I'm sorry if that puts you in an uncomfortable place."

Riku smiled; she was surprised to see it. "Kairi, all I want is for you to be happy. You're not letting me down by not going to that island."

Relief flooded her. She was worried what Riku might say when she confessed her intentions, but she should've known better. Riku had always supported her. He'd always wanted the best for her.

"Thank you, Riku. I just wish my Aunt and Uncle could see it that way."

He put an arm around her and pulled her to his chest. She gasped as he rubbed his fist into the top of her hair. "Riku!" she laughed before pushing him away from her, "What are you doing?"

He chuckled. Kairi loved how rich the sound of his laughter was. "I always thought you and Sora were perfect for each other," he confessed, "I thought I'd be Uncle Riku by now, if I'm being honest. But Kairi, it's your life. You should do what your heart tells you. Don't worry about what anyone else has to say."

She placed a hand on her heart and closed her eyes. Immediately, her favorite red-haired man popped into her mindsight. She could see the devilish gleam in his emerald eyes as he smirked at her.

"It's Axel, right?"

Kairi opened her eyes and met Riku's. "Riku, I-"

He placed a hand on her shoulder. "You should tell him how you feel."

She dropped her gaze to the sandy beach underneath her bare feet. Sand had already caked between her toes. "I'm scared, Riku." He wrapped his arms around her. She settled her forehead into his chest. "After Sora, my confidence is shaken. I'm not sure I'm strong enough to take the next step."

"You don't have to be strong, Kai. You just have to be willing."

Kairi smiled up at him. The familiar, playful gleam had returned to Riku's eyes. She was happy to see him looking more like his former self. She took in a deep breath of ocean air and sighed. "You're right. I'm going to tell him," she announced happily, "Thank you, Riku." She paused. "But how are we going to help Sora?"

"I won't give up on him, Kairi. That goofball is in there somewhere. I just have to find him." Riku's affect flattened. "I think Naminé is the key to understanding. She got into his head, I'm sure of it. I'm going to confront her."

Kairi nodded. Though she would not be returning to Sora's side, she sincerely hoped he returned to his usual, loving self. She missed the Sora she knew. "If there's anything I can do, please tell me. I don't want to give up on him either."

"I know you don't. I'll tell you anything I find out. We'll get through this."

She glanced down at the wristwatch she'd worn. "I have to go, Riku. You'll be at the party tomorrow, right?"

Riku nodded. "Wouldn't miss it." He released her and offered his arm. "I'll walk you to the fork in the road like usual?"

She giggled and slipped her arm into his. "Of course."

* * *

Kairi approached the porch of her childhood home. Axel was leaning against a column with his arms crossed. She didn't have to look at his face to know that his green eyes were boring into her as she came closer to the steps. Impatience was radiating from him.

"If you want to go, you should just go."

"I don't want to go. I was just talking to Riku about it," she explained with a small frown, "I'm not going to go there."

"Don't hold yourself back on my account."

Kairi hopped up the wooden steps and paused to stand beside him. She met his eyes and was surprised to see such a sensitive expression. Was he worried? "Axel, I'm not doing it for you. I'm doing it for me," she clarified, "Sora…he had his chance. There's nothing left to talk about."

Axel raised a brow. "You surprise me, princess."

"I thought you were calling me sweetheart now."

He cracked a smile. "Right. Excuse me, sweetheart. But why the change of heart? You stuck with him for so long despite how he treated you." The brooding look returned to his face. "Why not run back to him?"

Kairi hesitated. She'd thought of a million ways to tell Axel how she truly felt about him on her walk home. She glanced around, checking to make sure her Uncle wasn't listening to their conversation. Once she was sure they were alone, she continued. "Axel, I don't want to run back to Sora."

He uncrossed his arms and leaned toward her. "Care to elaborate on what your current plans are?"

Kairi bit her lip. That's all it took. Axel's lips were on hers. She wrapped her arms around his shoulders and pushed herself against him. Maybe he would get the message without her having to say anything.

"Kairi!"

She jumped away from him like a cat. Her Uncle was standing in the doorway, fury practically written on his forehead "U-Uncle," Kairi stammered, feeling like she was fourteen, not a thirty-something year old woman.

"Your Aunt needs help with the Christmas cookies for tomorrow's party. Why don't you help her instead of wasting your time here?" he suggested coldly. Kairi gulped and nodded. She turned her head to apologize to Axel, but her Uncle added, "Now, please."

Kairi grimaced and hurried into the house. She could feel Axel's eyes on her as she walked away.

She found her Aunt hunched over one of several sheets of cookie dough. Kairi's Aunt served Christmas cookies every year at their party; they were an island favorite. The auburn-haired woman wiped the sweat from her brow as she began flattening the dough with a rolling pin.

"Uncle said you need help," Kairi announced as she hurried over to her.

"Thank you, dear. It's not the same this year without you and Sora's help," she explained with a sigh, "It's a shame he won't be able to come to the party this year."

Kairi frowned. It was the same conversation over and over. She understood; her relatives missed Sora's presence. She couldn't blame them. Sora had a sunny presence that was easily missed. What she didn't understand was how they couldn't see how painful it was for her to hear how much they still loved him.

"We will manage without him," Kairi replied as she pulled her long, red hair into a bun, "Just tell me what you need me to do."

Her aunt frowned. "I guess you can cut out the snowflakes. That was Sora's favorite."

Kairi hid her scowl. What was her Aunt trying to do? No amount of pressure was going to make her go to the island and make up with Sora. It'd been a mistake to tell them. To take her mind off her frustration, she poured herself into the Christmas cookies. She wouldn't let her Aunt down, especially when she was missing a pair of hands because of her inability to keep her fiancé interested.

"Need any help?" came Axel's voice from the kitchen doorway.

Kairi grinned and nodded her head. "Yes, my Aunt was just saying how we were down a pair of hands this year," she answered, much to her Aunt's chagrin. "What can he do?"

The woman sighed and pointed to the sheets of already cut cookies. "He can begin cooking those while I decorate. Think he can manage?"

"Oh I'll manage," he grumbled.

Kairi smiled at him apologetically. She grabbed her supplies and moved so she could sit next to him on her stool. She knew she couldn't confess what she needed to in front of her Aunt, but maybe just being near him would do something to alleviate the pressure she was feeling.

She watched as he shoved a pan of cookies into the oven. He looked out of place in a kitchen filled with to the brim with cookie baking supplies.

"You should tie up your hair," Kairi instructed with a smile. She already knew he wasn't going to appreciate her comment.

Axel scoffed. "Sweetheart, you won't ever see me sporting a pony tail."

"Man bun?"

He laughed. The sound of it soothed Kairi's mind. Knowing he was enjoying himself made it much easier for her to. The trio worked steadily for hours and had managed to complete heaps of Christmas cookies by the time Kairi's Aunt called it a night. Kairi promised to finish the last few batches as she kissed her Aunt good night.

"Alone at last," Axel breathed once the woman had left, "Never thought it would happen."

She giggled, "I agree with you." She gave his hand a small squeeze. "I'm sorry this has been so difficult. I thought they would've warmed up to you by now."

He shrugged. "Can't please everyone." Despite what he said, she knew it bothered him more than he let on. He wouldn't have fretted over packing if he didn't care.

Kairi wiped the sweat from her hairline as she prepared to cut her last sheet of cookies. Axel had 'unintentionally' begun burning the snowflakes once he'd heard they were Sora's favorite, so she'd switched to using the Santa hat shape instead.

"What are you wearing to the party tomorrow?" she asked as she handed him the last baking sheet.

Axel smirked as he popped the cookies in the oven. "Only something that will make you want to hide me away."

Kairi hesitated, "Why does that worry me?"

 


	28. Holiday Set-Up

Kairi spotted Axel standing in the corner of the party parlor holding a plate piled full of cookies. He was wearing the most ridiculous, Christmas sweater she'd ever seen. It featured several gifts wrapped in colorful packaging with the words 'Unwrap Me' sewn into the material. Multi-colored LED lights were strung into the fabric on his torso and sleeves. They blinked in and out as though Axel were a walking Christmas tree. She couldn't stop giggling at him under her breath.

He certainly fit in with her Aunt's decorations. She'd filled the parlor with miniature Christmas trees, lights strung along the ceiling, and tons of holly everywhere. Her Uncle had even sprayed frost from on a can on the windows to make it look like it was snowing outside. Destiny Islands never had a proper winter so the detail set the vibe for the party. As long as no one wandered outside, they'd feel like they were in a holiday movie.

"You light up the whole room," Kairi joked once she'd reached him. She popped one of Axel's cookies in her mouth.

He smiled at her. "Not like you do." She blushed as his eyes trailed down her figure. She'd worn a deep green, flowing dress with puffed sleeves and a pair of black heels. Kairi didn't normally wear green, but she loved the way the skirt of the dress flowed as she moved.

"Kairi!"

She barely had time to turn before she was rushed by a hug. She recognized the bubbly brunette as Selphie immediately. The woman pulled away from her and screamed excitedly, hopping up and down in her glittery, high-heeled shoes. "Kairi! It's so good to see you. You never come home anymore!" Selphie cheered.

"It's good to see you too," Kairi giggled, "Where are Wakka and Tidus?"

"They'll be here soon. Something about wardrobe issues," Selphie explained with an eye roll. Her green eyes turned to Axel and Kairi could practically see the hearts fluttering in their irises. "And who is this?" she asked with a playful smile.

Axel answered for her, "The name's Axel." The redhead turned to Kairi. "Do you have a thing for green eyed, brunettes?"

Kairi thought of Olette back in Twilight Town. She hadn't realized how much she and Selphie looked alike. "I guess so."

Selphie leaned toward Kairi and loudly whispered, "Is he single?" Kairi blushed. She'd forgotten how brash Selphie could be.

"Good question. Am I single, sweetheart?" Axel asked, looking as though he was thoroughly enjoying himself.

"He calls you sweetheart?" Selphie nearly shouted, "I bet Sora doesn't like that!"

Kairi's face fell. Had no one on the island been notified of the end of their engagement? "Selphie, Sora and I aren't together anymore."

Selphie frowned, looking truly devastated by the news. "Oh my gosh, I'm so sorry, Kairi." She placed her hand on Kairi's shoulder. "I'll get you some wine." She eyed Axel again. "Then you can tell me about your new bad boy."

"H-He's not my boyfriend," she weakly called after Selphie.

"Of course not." Kairi flinched at the pain in his voice. Axel was scowling at her. "I'm just that guy you make out with sometimes, nothing special."

"Axel-"

He waved her off. "Don't trouble yourself, Kairi. I'll go mingle or something." Axel took his plate of cookies and walked away.

Kairi groaned and put her hands on her head. Why had she even said that? That would've been the perfect opportunity to show Axel how she felt, but instead she'd created more tension between them. Selphie returned to her side with a glass of wine. Kairi immediately drained the cup of its contents and grumbled under her breath.

Selphie gaped at her. "Kairi, since when do you drink like that?"

"Since I got dumped. I need another. Let's go, Selphie," she muttered as she stormed off toward the refreshments table her Aunt had set up.

Kairi spent most of the night standing next to that table, drinking glasses of wine like they were shots. It wasn't even 10 PM before the room was spinning and she was drowning in her angst. Axel did as he promised and kept his distance from her. She'd watched as he spoke to every attractive woman in the room. At times their eyes would meet, but Axel's only response was an infuriatingly, detached expression.

As angry as Kairi was about his behavior, she knew she was partly responsible for it. She'd been tactless and insensitive to denounce him to Selphie. It made her sound like she'd just been using him for physical gratification, which couldn't have been farther from the truth.

"I'm guessing you haven't talked to him yet."

Kairi jolted at the sound of Riku's voice. She stumbled slightly in her heels, holding onto the table for support. She was so drunk.

"Are you all right?" he questioned, moving closer to her.

"I'm  _fine_ ," she slurred, "Maybe not as fine as Axel but  _whatever_!"

Riku frowned at her and set his glass of eggnog down on the table. He watched as she sipped the remaining gulp of her wine. "How much have you had tonight, Kai?" he questioned. Riku was hovering even closer to her now.

She stared into the empty glass. "A shit ton…" she murmured.

Riku gently plucked the glass from her hands and set it down. "What's wrong? Is it about Sora?"

Kairi shook her head, worsening her dizziness. "No, it's Axel," she whined, "I-I said something stupid and now he's mad and with all those  _women_." She placed her hand on Riku's chest. "Riku, Sora's the only guy I've ever been with. I don't know how to do this! Selphie told me I should just make-out with him but I've already done that  _a lot_."

Riku looked uneasy. He muttered something under his breath that Kairi didn't catch. Something about 'taking care of her' or whatever, she didn't honestly care too much. She gripped his shirt, forcing him to look at her. "Riku, I need advice," she hissed. Her face was mere inches from his. Riku paled.

"Now isn't this a wonderful sight!"

Kairi and Riku turned to look at Riku's dad. His cheeks were flushed, indicating that he had consumed a generous amount of eggnog. "Dad," Riku groaned, "Don't."

Riku's father placed his hand on Kairi's shoulder. "I always thought my son was better suited for you," he gushed, "Don't let his awkward attitude fool you. He assures me he's very much into women."

"Dad!"

The older man continued. "You see his mother and I always wondered when you three were younger. Him and Sora were so touchy at that age we thought he might-"

"Dad!"

"-But then he kept coming home groaning about you and Sora and we knew he was jealous-"

"Dad!" Riku hollered. Kairi blinked and stared at Riku in disbelief. Riku's face was abnormally red. She'd always

suspected he might've liked her for a time when they were teenagers, but she'd never known for sure. "Excuse me, Kai. I think my dad needs a cup of water," he grumbled before leading his blabbing father away. If she hadn't been so intoxicated, she might've wanted to follow up on Riku's feelings. But since she was smashed, she forgot the scene in a few minutes.

Kairi glanced across the room, spotting Axel chatting with Selphie. The brunette was twirling her hair in her finger and laughing obnoxiously at everything Axel had to say. She inwardly groaned.  _Maybe I should just go to bed._ She nodded to herself and turned to leave when her Aunt grabbed her arm. Kairi barely managed to catch herself as an empty cookie tray was shoved into her hands.

"Refill this please, dear," her Aunt urged with a smile.

"Uh, sure," she muttered, before stumbling toward the kitchen. It was unfortunately on the other side of the island home. She used the wall to steady herself as she hurried through the darkened part of the house.

Kairi managed to arrive in the dimly lit kitchen without tripping. She spotted the extra cookies spread about the white and peach checkered countertop. There were still plenty left so she put as many on the plate as she could fit. She also couldn't resist eating a few herself as she worked up her courage to go back to the party.

"Kairi."

She nearly choked on the piece of cookie she'd been eating. She felt his strong hand hit her back as she regained her breath. Kairi pushed away from Sora and nearly fell into the kitchen sink. "W-What are you doing here?" she stuttered.

Sora wrung his hands together. He was dressed in a dark red button-down shirt, black slacks, and a candy cane striped tie. "Your Aunt let me in. She said she'd send you to me."

The betrayal nearly swept her off her feet. It was clear to her now that coming to Destiny Islands for the holidays had been a mistake. She made a mental note to return to Twilight Town as soon as possible. She couldn't stay here any longer.

"How dare you," Kairi uncharacteristically hissed, "I told you I didn't want to see you. And you just go over my head and arrange to be in my home?"

Sora lowered his eyes to the ground. "Kairi, if you just listen to me, I know that I can make things right, please." He looked at her with his puppy dog eyes. She felt herself weaken. He'd used the same expression on her countless times to get what he wanted.

She shook her head, gripping the counter for balance. "No, Sora. I already told you how I felt in the coffee shop." Kairi slowly made her way to the exit of the kitchen. Sora pursued her, daring to put his hands on her shoulders once she reached the doorway.

"Kairi, you've meant everything to me for as long as I can remember. I know it's hard to believe given how stupid I've been," Sora dropped his voice to a whisper, "Kairi, I love you. I've always loved you and I regret getting caught in Naminé's trap."

Kairi shook her head, unable to do much more. She regretted drinking so much wine. If only she'd known what her Aunt had planned for her. "D-Don't touch me."

"Kai-"

"I'll scream, Sora." He frowned. She felt her heart breaking again.

"I'm sorry, Kairi. I didn't mean to scare you." He removed his hands from her body and she did her best to straighten her posture. "I actually came here to give you something…I got you a Christmas present."

Kairi blinked. "You got me something?"

Sora nodded, a small smile forming on his lips. He pulled a small box from his pant's pocket and placed it in her hands. "Will you open it?" he requested.

She hesitated. Her eyes carefully studied the shimmering, golden paper that concealed the mystery inside. She couldn't resist. Kairi greedily tore into the packaging and popped the lid off the box within. A small, paopu fruit shaped charm was inside.

She frowned. "What is this?"

Her eyes met his nervous glance; Sora was wringing his fingers again. "I feel so bad for losing your charm, Kai. It meant so much to me. I thought maybe I could give you one this time and we could…start over?" The pitch of his voice jumped. Kairi would've giggled if the situation had been different.

"I can't accept this." She placed the box back in his hand, letting the wrapping paper fall to the floor.

"Kairi, please." She shook her head and grimaced. Nausea was beginning to bubble in her stomach. His professions of love were sucking the air out of the room.

Sora threw back his head as though the answer to all their problems was in the heavens. He suddenly let out a laugh. Perhaps it was? She blinked and looked up as well. Someone had hung mistletoe in the doorway. Sora eyed her with a goofy expression. She already knew what he was thinking.

"Sora-!"

She was silenced by the feeling of his soft lips on hers. The kiss reminded her of all the memories they'd shared together. Sora and Kairi had been inseparable as children, glued at the hip as teenagers, and deeply in love as adults. What had happened to them? And who was this man that stood before her with no regard for her wishes? It was too tragic for her to bear.

Sora pulled away from her. The smile on his face soon diminished by the sight of her tears. "Kairi, no, please don't cry."

"Sora!" she sobbed. She wished he'd stop tormenting her.

Sora's body visibly stiffened. She turned her head and saw why. Kairi had noticed that the room seemed lighter, but she hadn't realized it was because Axel and his blinking sweater had been watching. Her breath hitched in her throat as her eyes met his dark gaze.


	29. Care

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Maturity warning for explicit sexual content

Sora didn't know when to quit. That much was obvious to Axel. He couldn't give the heartthrob too much credit, though, he was certain Kairi's relatives had played a part in this disturbing reunion.

Axel had watched Kairi all night. She'd had way more wine than he'd ever seen her consume. When she hobbled away to the kitchen with an empty tray, he knew he should've gone after her immediately. She was in no condition to carry cookies or herself. That's why it surprised him that she had been sent at all. Her Aunt had been taking care of those details dutifully all night without assistance.

He wasn't the only one who'd thought it was strange. As soon as she was out of the room, Riku had given him a sharp nudge to the rib cage and inclined his head toward where Kairi had stumbled.

"Go," he'd instructed, "She wants you with her."

Axel was a proud man; it was hard for him to suck down his hurt and go to her. Part of him didn't even want to believe she wanted him. For one, why would she? Her relatives hated him. Plus, he'd been grumpy and unpleasant most of the trip. It was only a matter of time until she came to her senses and declared he was no good for her. To top it off, she seemed to be embarrassed to admit they were nearly a 'thing'. It's not like he was expecting to be claimed as a boyfriend when they hadn't even discussed it, but it hurt all the same. What was he to her?

Riku had made his decision easier when he'd scowled and added, "When I said take care of her, I didn't mean suck her face off every night." The anger in those aquamarine eyes was plenty of motivation to leave the parlor. He didn't want to be the one to correct Riku by adding he'd been canoodling Kairi in the mornings too.

He'd arrived just in time to watch Sora kiss Kairi. The sight was more sobering than having a bucket of cold water dumped on him. He watched carefully as she stood there, unmoving, as his lips pressed against hers. She hadn't moved when he'd pulled away either; she'd just stared at him and cried his name. And now, she still wasn't moving. No, she was too preoccupied eyeing Axel with a terrified expression.

Axel's pain was bordering unbearable. Had he misread the signals he thought she'd been sending? Had all the time they'd spent in each other's arms meant nothing to her? Kairi wasn't the type of woman who could easily engage in intimacy with someone she didn't care about. So maybe he did mean something to her, it just would never be as much as Sora meant to her.

The train of thought didn't stop him from marching to the pair and snatching Kairi away. He pulled her against him, tightening his grip on her waist.

"Get out!" he shouted, not caring if anyone heard him. The look of surprise on Sora's face was almost enjoyable. Instead of arguing, his rival stole one more glance at Kairi and then fled the home.

Axel's grip on Kairi didn't lax. He seized her tighter, enveloping her in his arms. He felt her arms wrap around him but it did little to comfort him. She was going to leave him; he was certain of it now. Sora had been right.

"Axel," she called, lifting her mouth from his blinking sweater, "That wasn't what it looked like. I-I didn't know!"

He let out a sigh. "I know you didn't."

"Come to my room."

"Your Uncle-"

"Will think I'm with Sora," she finished. Kairi put her hand in his and removed herself from his body. He allowed her to slowly pull him up the darkened staircase (he had to catch her twice) and into her room at the end of the hall. She locked the door and willingly fell back into his grasp.

Axel felt so conflicted. He wanted to enjoy the feeling of her body against his. He wanted to delight in her attention and believe that there could be something between them. But it seemed whenever he began to hope for a future with her, Sora always came back into the picture and complicated everything. He also knew with increasing certainty that he wouldn't be able to hide the truth of his actions from her forever. He would have to confess how he misled her and stole from her and face the possibility of losing her.

"Axel, are you okay?" she asked him. Her voice was as thick and soothing as honey. How he wanted to drown in it and forget everything else…

He resisted all of his instincts and ripped away from her. "I can't do this anymore, Kairi. This isn't right, I'm sorry-"

She grabbed his chin and forced him to look at her. "Ssh," she soothed, "I've been trying to tell you something..."

Axel lifted his brows. Kairi was blushing. He could tell by the nervous look in her eyes. It was the same way she looked every time she was embarrassed to admit something.

"What is it, Kairi?"

She bit her lip and he nearly attacked her with his own. Kairi knew what effect that had on him yet she continued to do it. Was her teasing purposeful? He watched as she placed her hands on either side of his face and pulled him toward her. "Call me sweetheart," she whispered before kissing him.

Kairi tasted like sugar cookies and red wine. Two flavors he wouldn't have normally found delicious, but now couldn't get enough of. His hands groped her ass, pressing her against him, hard. She wrapped her arms around his shoulders so she could jump onto him. She wasn't usually so acrobatic…not that he was complaining.

Behind him, he heard two objects hit the ground. He turned his head to see what had been knocked over, but Kairi pulled him back to her mouth.

"My shoes," she breathed between kisses.

To his surprise, she slipped her tongue into his mouth. He suspected her performance was more a result of alcohol than the affection she had for him.

He stumbled backward, plopping onto her bed as she savagely claimed his face as her own. She laced her hands in his hair, sending waves of tingles across his scalp. If she continued this onslaught, he wasn't going to be able to resist her.

Kairi finally pulled away for air. He liked the way her chest heaved when she was breathless.

"Axel, why are you holding back?" she asked.

"You're a perceptive drunk," he joked, hoping to distract her.

Kairi attempted to put her hands on her hips and nearly fell on the floor. He caught her back and held her steady in his lap. "Thank you," she giggled, "Axel, what did you say? Will you help me remember?"

"When?"

She rolled her eyes. "On the deck at the party, you know, when we got air."

"Why do you still wear the engagement ring?" Axel suggested coyly.

Kairi shook her head. "No…I was thinking about the part when you told me to forget about Sora and let you care for me," she confessed with a sly expression.

Axel groaned and fell back against the mattress. Kairi tumbled forward with him, barely managing to catch herself with her hands. Her hair tickled his nose so he swatted it away from his face.

"What are you bringing that up for?" he grumbled.

She kissed each of his tattoos. Axel hesitated. His resistance was cracking; her sultry eyes were calling to him. "I feel more than attraction for you too." Her voice dropped to a whisper. "You're not just some guy I make out with sometimes. You're more than that. I'm not going back to Sora."

Axel captured her lips in one, swift movement. His hands grabbed her hips so he could flip himself on top of her. She gasped and giggled underneath him.

"Kairi!" There was a banging on the door. Axel cursed under his breath.

Kairi groaned and shouted back, "What?" He was surprised by the tone of her voice. He'd never heard her talk to her Aunt that way.

"I've been looking for you! Why'd you lock the door?" the woman called.

"Well, stop. Can't you see I don't want to be bothered? I can't believe you invited Sora!" Axel could feel her rage trembling out of her body.

"Sweetie, he's sorry-"

"Just leave me alone!"

There was a pause. "Fine, I'll tell everyone you weren't feeling well. We will talk tomorrow."

Axel waited until he heard her footsteps receding down the stairs. He raised a brow at the woman beneath him. "Well I think that just took you out of the running for Niece of the Year."

She shook her head. "I'm not letting anyone take you away from me tonight."

Desire filled him. "I like the sound of that." He kissed her again, tenderly biting her lip. She moaned underneath him, giving him chills. Unfortunately, he knew the lovely sounds were only going to bring her Uncle up the stairs. "We have to be quiet, sweetheart."

She nodded. "Okay." She giggled and shook her head. "Okay, now." Sexy and adorable. Still, his favorite combination.

Silently, they kissed and groped each other. The time apart had only increased his need of her. Desperation and hunger were fighting to consume him.

Axel kissed and bit his way down her neck and exposed collar. He reached for the end of her dress and pulled up the layers of fabric. He resumed his kissing on her stomach, pausing once he'd reached the band of her underwear. He could make out the stripes and smiling cat heads on them. He smirked. She clearly hadn't planned for this tryst either.

"What are you looking at?" she whispered.

"Cats, apparently," he chuckled.

"S-Stop," she quietly stuttered, "I didn't think we'd-"

He shushed her. "I can fix this. Not that I don't find them cute, but we can't have them interrupting anything." He slid his slender fingers under the elastic and yanked them off her legs, allowing her to kick them onto the floor. It was the first time Kairi had allowed him to take off her panties. He reveled in the new discovery.

Axel lifted his head to look at her face. Curiously, he tapped her newly exposed flesh with his index finger. Her eyes widened; he had to restrain himself from laughing.

"Like that?" She nodded. "Good."

With one swift pull, he brought her to the edge of her bed and sunk to his knees. She sat up, watching him with a strange expression. Instead of answering her silent inquiry, he grabbed the hem of her dress and dove under. Kairi's legs tightened around his head as he maneuvered her hips into a good position; the lights attached to his sweater were more useful than Axel thought they would be. He placed his mouth against her, causing her to jolt. Encouraged by her reaction, his tongue gently licked her. She tasted just as he imagined and he soon couldn't help himself. His tongue flicked and swirled against her with increasing speed and pressure.

Kairi gasped loudly. He ripped away and out from under her dress. She was panting, looking more flushed than he'd ever seen.

"What happened to being quiet, sweetheart?" he asked, enjoying the sight of her. The more he saw of her, the more he wanted her. He needed to possess her, to own her, like she owned him. He yearned to find his place of belonging within her. Surely, there was space for him there.

"Sorry!" she squeaked.

He pushed her dress out of the way. "Just grab my hair when you want to make a sound." Axel didn't wait for her to agree, he lowered his head between her thighs. This time, he slowed his pace, deliberately drawing out the most from each sensation. Her hands sunk into his thick hair, tugging adamantly. He could feel her body squirming underneath his tongue. With every stroke, she seemed to beg for more. Her breathing became louder and he relished in her struggle to stay quiet. He wanted to be the one to drive her crazy, to push her to the edge.

Axel dared to push his middle finger inside her, earning another hushed groan from Kairi. With a smirk, he slid his finger further inside, rubbing against her flesh. Her legs were trembling around him. He continued to pleasure her, with pressured licks and thrusts as her frenzied hands tore into his hair. Her hips rocked into him as she succumbed to steady attention with a sharp inhale. Her grip on his hair loosened so he came up for air. Axel was pleased to discover her chest heaving in the way he liked.

"Enjoy yourself?" he teased as he rose to his full height. He kicked off his shoes and laid down beside her on the twin-sized mattress. Their legs were dangling over the side.

She turned her head to face him. There was a smile on her lips. "I did but I don't think it's enough." Kairi leaned toward him and began lifting the blinking sweater off his body. He helped her, genuinely eager to take the itchy thing off. Her small hands dropped to his pants. She nimbly undid the button, zipper, and was soon tugging them off his long legs.

Axel felt like he was on fire. Every time their skin touched, the burning sensation in his core spread and provoked him further. His hands wrapped around her back and undid the zipper of her dress. With her help, he'd tossed it off her head and to the floor. The sight of her naked body stole his reason and pulled him into a carnal fury.

It wasn't like he'd never been with a woman before. He had experienced physical pleasure several times in his life, but he'd never felt so crazed before now. Every kiss, every quiet whimper that escaped her lips left him wanting. The satisfaction he should've felt when she'd yanked off his underwear was minimal. He needed more. He needed everything from her. He needed her to love him.

Kairi pried her mouth from his. He watched her impatiently. "Kairi," he nearly growled, needing her like he needed air.

She reached into the drawer of the bedside table and presented him with a square package. She was handing him a condom. He blinked.

She giggled and carefully opened the plastic. Kairi placed the latex against him, smoothing it along his skin. Her fluttering touches were torture. He watched as she adjusted her position, readying herself for him. Surely, it wasn't real. There had to be some kind of catch.

"Axel…" she murmured. The impatience obvious in her tone.

Axel cursed his conscience as he moved away from her. It wasn't what he needed right now. He shouldn't be hesitating, he should be grinding her into oblivion. He growled in frustration. He'd become a sap, a true, hopeless sap.

"I can't do this," he confessed.

She jolted from the mattress. "What?"

It wasn't Riku's fault he couldn't create a mood. It was his own. He cared too much. No, he loved her too much. And he knew he wasn't worthy of her.

He placed his hands on her bare shoulders. "I can't do this if there's a chance you're going back to him. I need to know you're mine. But I'm not good enough, I-"

She caressed his face with her hands, silencing him with the soothing motion. His eyes were pulled into her confident stare. "Axel, I  _am_ yours."

That was all he needed to hear. He pushed her back onto the pink, floral bedspread. She pulled him down with her, snaking her legs around his hips. In a swift movement, Axel had possessed her. She arched her back underneath him; her eyes clamped shut as she bit down on her lip to keep quiet.

"Kairi, look at me," he urged as he pushed into her further. Her indigo eyes fluttered open; the sight nearly stole his breath. He struggled to remain silent as he claimed her with all that he was. His hands bore into her tender hips, grasping her as tightly as he could, as though she was going to disappear.

His need for her was ardent. His obsession with pleasing her profound. The mere motion of moving inside of her was indescribable. She was so heavenly, his entire body was pulsing. She shoved her mouth into his neck to keep silent as he ravaged her. Axel gasped suddenly:  _No!_ He was unable to stop himself from slipping over the edge too quickly. A unique mix of satisfaction and disappointment washed through him.

Kairi caught him as he collapsed, holding him tightly as he rode on the waves of his pleasure. Her small hands played in his sweat-tinged hair. He'd never felt so at peace.

Once he'd found his voice, Axel apologized, "I am so sorry, sweetheart. This…doesn't usually happen."

She giggled, "I'm flattered."

He lifted his face from her body. Axel was stunned. How could she be even more beautiful than she was before? He chuckled, "I don't know what you've done to me."

He was surprised to see his own smirk mirrored on her sweet face. "Nothing yet." Axel was speechless. "You're mine now, remember?"

"I love you," he blurted out. He winced. Axel had hoped his confession would be more charming and romantic. Too late now.

She smiled and replied, "Show me how much."

And he was ready for round two.


	30. Together

Kairi collapsed on the bed next to a panting Axel. She wiped the beads of sweat from her forehead before turning to face him. His smoldering gaze was already on her. If she wasn't so exhausted, she would've blushed. He placed a kiss on her temple and wrapped his arms around her. She happily settled into his bare chest.

She and Axel had returned to Twilight Town once Christmas dinner had ended. After facing her Aunt and Uncle's betrayal of her feelings, she couldn't stand to be in the same place with them for the rest of the holidays. She hated to hurt them with her premature departure, but she also hated to be hurt by their inability to understand that she'd made her decision about Sora. If Riku could understand, why couldn't they?

"What are you thinking about?"

"My Aunt and Uncle," she answered with a slight frown, "I wish they could understand. Just because they stuck together through their extramarital affairs doesn't mean that's what I want for me."

"It's your life, sweetheart. Make the most of it." Axel paused and then chuckled. She loved the way it reverberated from his chest. "Something tells me they'll never like me now."

Kairi sighed, "They're so stubborn."

He smirked. "The apple doesn't fall far from the tree, sweetheart."

She rolled out of his arms and playfully glared. "I take offense to that," she laughed, "I'm very accepting."

Axel tapped his chin. "Hm, funny, that's not how I remember it."

"Well I will just have to fix your memory." She leaned forward and kissed his lips. "How about now?"

He pretended to think, letting his fingers ghost across her shoulder. "Your effect on me is powerful, I confess. But not powerful enough to rewrite my memories."

She feigned a pout. "Oh, all right. I give up." She wrapped her arms around his torso and returned her head to his chest. "Maybe I'm stubborn too but I'm grateful that I have you anyway." She felt him stroke the top of her hair as he laughed again.

Kairi was at peace. Finally. After years of waiting on the wrong man, she found her way to the person that had truly accepted and supported her. Yes, they still argued. Yes, it would take work to maintain their relationship. But she was ready for that. She was ready to have something real, no matter how difficult it was.

She moved her head so she could view his face. Axel's eyes were closed and his breathing had slowed. She smiled as she studied his face under the dim light from the desk lamp in his room. Ever since they'd walked through the door of the townhome, she'd kept him physically occupied and he'd done the same to her. Kairi could probably count on her fingers the number of times she'd left Axel's bed since they'd returned. The amount of times she'd managed to put on a piece of clothing was even less.

"Axel, are you awake?"

He hummed in response. "Barely."

She giggled, "I guess I wore you out."

He opened one, green eye. "Mhm."

A thought crossed her mind. "Axel," Kairi hesitated, "What do you want out of life?"

His other eye opened. "I was wondering when we'd have a serious  _relationship_  talk." He smirked. "I believe you have to promise not to laugh for me to answer."

Kairi rolled her eyes. She should've expected him to tease her with her own words. "Yeah, sure."

"What I want out of life is simple, sweetheart. To be with the people that matter."

He could've recited Shakespearean poetry and it wouldn't have sounded sweeter. Kairi lifted herself from his arms, earning a quizzical look from Axel. She repositioned herself so she was straddling his hips. She wanted to be able to look him in the eyes. "Is that really all that you want?" she asked, "Nothing else?"

Axel smirked, obviously enjoying the view of her bare chest. "Well, with you sitting like that, I could name a few other desires."

"Axel!"

"All right, all right," he chuckled, "I'll return to our serious mood. Yes, Kairi, that's all I want." He paused; the playful gleam in his eyes died. He almost looked heartbroken, as though he'd remembered something terrible. "There's no point in living if you can't be with the people that make you feel alive. Roxas, Xion, and you. That's all I need."

She could feel her heartbeat quicken. "Me?"

"Of course, you. I keep telling you to get it memorized. I love you."

Of course she knew that. Kairi wasn't stupid, she was just in denial. Every time he'd whispered it in her ear, she'd heard his words and felt his emotions coursing through her. However, believing that Axel truly loved her was different and understandably difficult. Sora had told her the same thing and their relationship had turned out horribly. But somehow, Axel's confession was different now. The words felt more tangible.

"Axel-"

He wagged his finger in her face. "Listen up, sweetheart. You're part of my dream now so don't go thinking you're not important to me. I'm no Sora, remember? It's going to be different. I'm going to be different." Kairi opened her mouth to speak but he shushed her. "First things first, I'm going to make you fall madly in love with me."

Kairi was silenced. A familiar heat tingled across her face. Was it possible to feel embarrassed with Axel after everything they'd done?

He grabbed her left hand and smirked. "Second, you're going to find a new ring on your finger." Her eyes widened. "Third, we're going to have an amazing wedding. You can invite all your green-eyed, brunette friends and disappointed family members. Then, we'll go on a nice, long trip and thoroughly enjoy ourselves."

"Axel-!"

"Ssh! I guess we should add some couple's counseling in there. Clearly, we're going to have some communication issues." Kairi was too stunned to roll her eyes. "Fourth, we're going to complete your dream and have a family of redheaded tykes that deprive us of sleep and eat all our food. And last but not least, the fifth step. You're going to spend the rest of your life waking up next to me and nobody else."

She wasn't sure when, but at some point, she'd started crying. Kairi could feel the tears slowly trickling down her cheeks. "D-Do you really mean that?" she questioned, "Because I can't…I can't be disappointed again, Axel."

He brushed a tear off her face with his thumb. "When I make a promise, I keep it."

She sunk into him swiftly, evoking a deep 'oof' from Axel's core. Her arms gripped around him as tightly as her tired muscles would allow. She felt his arms around her, pulling her deeper into his warmth. "This is real," she whispered, "Isn't it?"

"It's very real, sweetheart." He kissed the top of her head. "I was also thinking we should get our own place. Not that this isn't nice, but we should start fresh."

Happiness was bubbling inside of her. "Of course, as long as it's not that place without the counter space." Axel laughed.

It wasn't a proposal. It was a promise. A new promise. She smiled into his skin. She wasn't going to let this one be broken or forgotten, and she was certain that Axel was determined to ensure that as well. There would be no more confusion, no more grief over a man who was in her heart but not in her life. Kairi was ready for a new beginning.

"Axel, I-"

"Wait, Kairi."

She jerked her head up from his body. The way he'd said her name shot alarm signals through her being. Something was wrong.

"What is it?"

He took a breath. "There's something I need to tell you."

She flinched. Why was it always that phrase? "What?" she managed to whisper.

Axel hesitated. Her heart sunk. Was her new start already compromised? He suddenly grabbed her and pinned her underneath him. Kairi barely managed a yelp before Axel had kissed her. She pulled her face away from his and cried, "Axel, what was that?"

He chuckled, "I thought we could use a break from being serious."

She let out the breath she'd been holding in. Axel had just been messing with her. There was nothing that was going to tear them apart. She shook her head and grumbled, "You almost scared me!"

"Get used to it, sweetheart."

Kairi pulled him into another kiss. With her eyes closed, she missed the guilt in Axel's.


	31. Eruption

Kairi fiddled with the straps of her black heels. Her eyes cut to the clock on the wall. Axel was late. In fact, it was the first time she could remember him ever being late for anything. Fear began to trickle into her chest. Did something happen to him? It was New Year's Eve. He could've ran into trouble with anyone. The entire town (minus the children) was intoxicated.

Axel had promised to be back with plenty of time to spare before they left to Roxas and Xion's New Year's party. Xion had promised 'small', but Axel was betting it'd be larger than the Halloween Party. Kairi smoothed the skirt of the red, silk dress she'd slipped on. It was sleeveless and stopped at her mid-thigh. She hadn't worn the dress since…well, it didn't matter. She just wanted to impress Axel with it.

_I should've insisted he drive instead of using public transportation_ , she thought with a groan. Axel had joked it was better that he took the bus so he wouldn't be tempted to run over drunk pedestrians, but now he was out among them. She glanced at her cell phone. Perhaps it was time to call.

She heard a key turn in the door.  _Finally_.

Excitedly, she made her way toward the door only to stop in her tracks. A cheesing, brunette man was walking in like he owned the home. And in a sense, Kairi supposed he did. She couldn't wait until she and Axel moved into their own place.

"Sora, what are you doing here?" she questioned with a frown.

He chuckled nervously, "Well, I was hoping to find you…Surprise?"

Kairi sighed and shook her head. "Does Riku know you're here?" Sora winced. She rolled her eyes. Of course he hadn't told Riku. "You're not going to give up, are you?"

Sora smiled. "You know me, I never back down from a challenge."

Kairi crossed her arms over her chest. "Is that what I am to you? A challenge?"

He blanched. "W-Wait, no! I didn't mean it like that!"

She giggled despite herself. Sora seemed more like her childhood, best friend when he flustered like that. She almost believed he was himself again. "Sora, Axel is going to be home soon and I don't want to fight with him tonight. It's New Year's Eve."

A small frown formed on his lips. "You two are together, aren't you?"

Pride filled her stomach. "Yes, we are." She couldn't help smiling. "Ever since Christmas, but if I'm honest, I've had feelings for him since before that."

"Oh." His voice crackled. "Are you…happy?"

Kairi nodded. "Very."

Sora rubbed the back of his neck. "I guess I missed my shot. I wondered why he was in Destiny Islands. It makes sense now. But Kairi, are you sure?"

"Why wouldn't I be?"

He leaned against the island countertop. "I just wonder if you really know him, that's all."

She furrowed her brows. "Of course, I know him."

"Really?"

"Really!" Something akin to fear filtered through her gut. Her thoughts jumped to Axel's strange behavior the night he'd confessed his five-step plan to her. Had he played off what he wanted to tell her? Was Axel hiding something?

Sora dared step closer to her. "I know I haven't always shown you that I care, but Kai, I hope you know that I've always wanted you to be happy."

"Then why get with Naminé? Why hurt me that way?"

Sora averted his eyes. She followed his gaze and saw the Paopu cookie jar. His actions and his words didn't make any sense. Did she have to become a mind reader to truly understand what had happened to him?

"I must sound like a fool to you. If you can't believe what I tried to explain to you, at least believe this, things are over between me and her." Kairi frowned. "After I got chased out of here by Axel when you were sleeping, I-"

"Chased out of here by Axel?" Kairi narrowed her eyes. "What do you mean?"

He blinked. "You really didn't know? When Riku told me you were in the hospital, I came here as soon as I could! I wanted to see you, but Axel wouldn't let me past. We fought, I actually slugged him a couple of times. I'm not that proud of it…if Riku hadn't come I don't think we would've stopped either." Sora rubbed the back of his neck again. "I-uh, I just didn't want to lose you to him, but I guess I did."

Kairi stifled a gasp. Through all the times she'd spent crying over the fact Sora had ignored her and not bothered to see her after her hospitalization, Axel had been at her side. Not once had he corrected her assumptions. Not once had he mentioned that Sora had come for her and that  _he'd_  kept him away. It was hard for her to pinpoint what she was feeling. She just knew it wasn't good.

"Kairi, you okay?" Sora's expression was full of concern.

"Don't lie to me, Sora," she snapped, "Swear you're telling me the truth!"

Sora frowned and held up his hands in surrender. "I promise. I don't want to lie to you or anyone else ever again."

"I didn't know you came," her voice was a mere whisper, "I thought you didn't care enough to. You'd changed so much…"

"I know, I ruined everything between us. I'm sorry. It's my fault you couldn't believe I'd care enough to come for you, but Kai, you gotta know that I'll always come for you. No matter what."

There were tears in her eyes and she hated it. It was too much. Everything she'd been so confident about felt false. Sora had come for her? Axel was a liar?

"Sora, you have to go," Kairi replied firmly. He looked taken aback. "I need to talk to Axel about this. There must be a reason he hid the truth from me."

Sora scrunched his nose and argued, "You're giving him more consideration than you gave me."

A surge of emotion flooded her. "Of course I am!" she nearly hollered, "Axel has been there for me this entire time. Maybe you did come and try to see me that day, but that doesn't change anything. You still chose Naminé even if things are over between you now." She could feel her body trembling from the raw anger. "It's been so hard for me, Sora. I couldn't even take off your engagement ring for so long!"

His eyes dropped to her finger. "Well, you seem to have managed it."

"Only because of Axel. Axel means well, I know he does," she protested, "He would never hurt me intentionally."

"Like me?" Sora's expression darkened. "I'd hurt you intentionally?"

She turned away from him. "You took my bracelet, didn't you?"

"What bracelet?" The bewilderment in his voice infuriated her. Had he forgotten the bracelet too?

She whipped back around and pointed a finger at him. "The charm bracelet you gave me! The hearts that represented the years of our engagement. You took that with when you left, you're the one who ended this, not me!"

Sora's face flushed. "What? I don't have your bracelet. I thought you just stopped wearing it."

Her eyes widened. "What?"

Sora pounded his fist into his hand. "This has to be Axel's doing."

"No, it can't be…"

His eyes bored into her. "He misled you about me, Kai. I know that I haven't been the best to you, but he shouldn't have meddled. And because he did meddle, how can you think he's not behind the disappearance of your bracelet?"

Kairi floundered. Sora's logic made sense, she couldn't deny that. Axel had always expressed a great dislike for Sora, but she hadn't attributed his reactions to jealousy. However, the more she thought about it, the more sense it made. Axel was extremely sensitive when it came to Sora. She could easily picture him hiding pieces of the truth from her and stealing her bracelet when she wasn't aware.

The discovery felt like a punch to the gut. She was disappointed, bordering on devastated. But this was Axel. He'd always done everything he could to cheer her up, support her, and stand by her side when things were hard. He'd just made a mistake, right? But why hadn't he told her? He'd had so many opportunities to.

"I have to hear it from him, Sora."

Surprisingly, Sora's expression softened. He took her hand in his and she was amazed that the touch didn't alarm her. He felt like an old friend instead of the man who'd viciously broken her heart. "Kairi, thanks."

That was the last thing she expected him to say. "For what?"

He smiled shyly. "You've reminded me of what I've forgotten how to do. I've been so  _obsessed_  with getting you back that I forgot how real love looks. You gave me so many chances to turn things around and I didn't take them. I was really stupid," he confessed, "Your heart is so strong, Kai. I wish I could be more like you. I've always needed you to guide me, looks like it'll never change."

His confession warmed her insides. She squeezed his hand and gave him a small smile. "I'll never stop believing in you, Sora. Things may never be how they were but that will never change."

He shook his head as though he was ridding himself of something. "I'm sorry…I shouldn't have pushed myself on you like that. To be honest, I don't know what came over me."

Kairi giggled, "You haven't always been one to think things through."

He frowned. "What's that supposed to mean?" Their eyes met and they both erupted into laughs. Kairi's smile widened. She'd missed Sora so much. The real Sora.

"All right, I'll go," Sora agreed once he'd stopped laughing, "I hope things between you and Axel will be okay. I can see that you care a lot about him."

She nodded. "I really do…Sora?"

"Hm?"

She pulled him into a hug. Familiar feelings of safety and contentment settled over her. "I've missed you. Please return to Riku and me fully," she whispered as her head settled on his shoulder. Kairi could hardly believe she wanted to touch him, let alone embrace him.

Sora's hands gripped her back. His spiky head settled beside hers. "I will, I promise." She listened as he took in a deep breath. "But you know, I'll never stop loving you, Kairi."

"I know. I'll never stop loving you either, Sora. You're-"

"Well, isn't this absolutely touching?"

Kairi jerked away from Sora. How had Axel entered the townhome without her hearing the door? She panicked. How much had he heard? Surely, he didn't think she was trying to get back with Sora?

"Axel-"

"Save it, Kairi." The sound of her name on his lips stung. "I've heard it all." Her heart dropped.

"Axel, no, you didn't hear it all. Just let me explain, please."

"What is there to explain, Kairi? You'll always love him. You said so yourself. You haven't even told me that you loved me," Axel argued. A frown settled upon his lips as his eyes cut toward her. "…Now I see why."

Kairi couldn't tear her eyes away from that frown. It taunted her, blamed her like it was all her fault he was upset. She clenched her fists and glared at him. Axel was not the one who'd been betrayed. He had no right to look at her that way. "After everything we've been through, you can only focus on that? When are you going to stop acting like a jealous child?"

"I'm acting like a child?"

Her hands flew to her hips. "Yes! Tell me, Axel, when did you plan on telling me about you and Sora fighting?" Axel's face paled as his shoulders slumped. The guilt in his eyes was unmistakable. "And you helped me look everywhere for my bracelet…but you took it, didn't you?" He looked away. He couldn't even argue with her. Kairi felt as though a weight had fallen on her; her pain was immense. "How could you?"

"What choice did I have?" he finally muttered.

"The right choice: honesty!" Kairi cried, losing her remaining bits of composure, "You watched me cry over him and you never corrected me. You just let me feel hopeless and betrayed!"

"Should you have felt any different?" Axel thundered, "He cheated on you and slept with you right after he came home from a trip with her!"

Kairi didn't back down. "You should've let me choose how I wanted to feel, not how you thought I should feel."

Axel groaned, running his fingers through his hair. "Everyone thinks they're right," he grumbled, "You, me, Sora." His hateful gaze flashed to the silent brunette. Sora had been watching the scene with his mouth agape. Kairi had forgotten he was there. She almost felt embarrassed he'd had to see their shouting match. His presence didn't stop her from continuing, though.

"I don't think I'm right, Axel, I  _am_  right. If Sora hadn't told me-"

"You!" Axel suddenly hissed at Sora, "You couldn't wait for the opportunity to come here and say anything to get her back in your arms, could you?"

Sora's cheeks puffed in anger. Before he could respond, Kairi stepped between them and poked Axel's chest, accusingly. "This isn't about what Sora told me. It's about how you lied to me and weren't even going to tell me about it. And stop talking about me like I just fall into men's arms when I'm upset! I can make my own choices."

How could Axel lie to her? How could he accuse her of being so fickle? It'd taken her so long to be comfortable with her romantic feelings for him, and now he was throwing them in her face. Maybe Sora was right to question her. Did she really know him?

Kairi could see Axel visibly backing down. Shame was oozing from his face. She wanted to believe he felt badly, but she also didn't know what to believe anymore.

"I didn't mean it like that. Look…I was coming home to tell you tonight," Axel confessed, the anger seeming to deflate from his being.

Kairi hesitated, her eyebrows drooped. "You were?" She eyed him warily. When he wasn't fuming, he seemed more like the man she thought she knew.

"Yes," Axel swore, "I wanted to tell you so many times but I didn't know how and I knew how I'd-"

Sora butted in, "Don't listen to him, Kai. He'll say anything right now. He's desperate." Kairi faced Sora with a look of bewilderment. Was he really accusing someone else of being a liar?

"Shut up, Sora!" Kairi and Axel both shouted. Kairi took a step back, surprised Axel had uttered the same sentence. He seemed just as shocked. Their eyes met, timidly. It took a moment, but a small smile formed on his lips. This was Axel, her Axel.

Kairi felt herself relax. "Sora, please go," she urged, "Axel and I need to discuss this alone."

She heard Sora huff. "Fine," he agreed with obvious reluctance, "But Axel, when you said my engagement to Kairi was over, I thought you meant it was her decision, not yours!"

Kairi's eyes hardened again. Anguish rose through her chest causing her to feel faint. "What? What are you talking about, Sora?"

Sora clenched his fists. "I bet he took your bracelet just to make it look like I'd ended things with you so he could have you all to himself."

"What? No!" Kairi clutched her hand to her chest. She couldn't stop herself anymore. She cried, letting out an angry, desperate wail. "Axel! Why?" It  _was_  too much. Was there anyone she could trust?

"What's your problem, Sora?" Axel growled. In mere seconds, he'd snatched Sora's shirt and raised his fist to deliver a blow.

Kairi gasped for air. The world seemed to slow around her as she watched them struggle. Grunts, punches, and smacked skin flooded her ears. This couldn't be happening. Not Axel. Not Sora.

"No!" she cried, rushing between them, "Don't do this!" Anger and confusion took control as she threw herself into Sora's body, breaking Axel's hold. The unsuspecting brunette was pushed to the ground with Kairi protectively grasping him in her arms.

She tumbled into his confused cerulean gaze. "K-Kairi?" he stammered.

With a blink, her senses settled and apprised what she'd done. Leaping in front of Sora had been like a reflex, an instinct. But she knew that's not how Axel was going to understand what had happened. Hesitantly, she turned to look at the fiery man. Axel was a tower of rage. Kairi could hardly recognize him.

He began to pace and flex his fingers. "You both…think you can do  _whatever_  you want," he hissed. The volume of his voice jumped as he snarled, "Well, I'm sick of it!" Axel glared at her. He'd never looked at her that way, not in all of their arguments. The fury in his blackened eyes burned through her core. Was this the real Axel? "Go on! Go back to him if that's what you want."

Kairi silently lifted herself from the floor, wiped the tears from her eyes, and marched toward Axel. She'd had enough of his accusations and doubts, and enough of his lies and deceit. She was not going to sit there and let him yell at her when he was the one who was wrong. With one swift movement, she struck him across the face. Axel's eyes were wide. Gone was his seething and hostility. He was finally speechless.

"I-I can't believe this," she choked. Her entire body shaking from her own rage and sorrow. "Maybe I don't know you after all. I never thought you'd lie to me and attack Sora like this. I never thought you'd treat me this way!"

Her own words slammed back into her chest, triggering remorse. She looked at the hand that had struck him. Had she really treated Axel poorly in return? Her own eyes widened as though she'd been struck too. Her shock was quick to fade. Instead of feeling guilty, she steeled herself. She wasn't going to apologize. His behavior was out of control. He deserved it…right?

"You're right, you don't know me, Kairi." She felt herself falter again. Axel didn't sound like the angry, vengeful man he'd been acting as. The sensitive, insecure tone of his voice crushed her. "And you won't get the chance to either. I'm through with this."

"…Fine," was all she said.

"Goodbye, Kairi."

Her heart lurched as he turned and walked to the door. Memories flashed through her mind of their time together. When she had no one else, he was there and had personally ensured that she had more people to lean on than just him. When she cried, he'd wiped her nose and snuggled her until she calmed down. When she was bored, he'd livened things around the house. And when she was happy and successful, he'd been her loudest cheerleader. Was he really gone?

She shook her head.  _No!_ Kairi left Sora on the floor and hurried after Axel.


	32. Gravity

"Another one, sir?"

Axel groaned, pushing some of his drooping, fiery locks out of his face. He stared at the nearly empty glass of whiskey on the bar in front of him.

"Sure, why not?" he agreed with a toss of his hand, "Doesn't matter anymore."

He hunched over the dark wood of the bar with his head in his hands. Thankfully, the light in the underground bar was dim and uneven throughout the large room. Only he and a few other men were at the establishment. Axel couldn't have been more grateful for the damp, lonely place. At least no one would be able to see him fall apart.

_"_ _I can't be disappointed again, Axel."_

Looks like he'd finally made a promise he couldn't keep. Axel had screwed up big time and he knew there was no going back. He'd lost her.

Another whiskey was placed in front of him. Axel stared at the brown liquid. It reminded him of the color of Sora's hair. He let out a sigh. The man was probably still at Kairi's side. No doubt she was sobbing about the way they'd left things. Axel grimaced. Then again, why would she? She probably wanted nothing to do with him anymore. He'd lied to her, deceived her. How could she ever trust him again? He wasn't any better than Sora and isn't that what he'd promised? To be different?

He let out a dry laugh. When had he ever been anything but a disappointment? He hadn't been good for her from the get go. Kairi was gentle, sweet, and full of faith; everything right with the world. Axel was sarcastic, dark, and cynical; a two-faced man with his own agenda. It'd only been a twist of fate that they'd even shared the same space for so long. And instead of that twist of fate enriching her life, it'd been nothing but a negative influence.

It'd become harder and harder to look at her and see those honest, indigo eyes smiling at him, completely oblivious to the awful thing he'd done. Axel hadn't been lying; he had planned to tell Kairi the truth as soon as he got home. He'd thought of several ways to break it to her that he'd deceived her about Sora and had rehearsed each one. It hadn't been a full-blown, malicious lie; he'd simply just hidden Sora's efforts from her and stolen a token she treasured. He hesitated.

"Well, when you put that way…" he grumbled with another swallow.

He'd been a complete, piece of shit to her. Axel thought if he confessed and apologized and begged for forgiveness they could move on, but of course he'd been running late and Sora had beat him to the punch. Per usual. Axel never seemed to have any luck. Though, he couldn't put the blame on that either, he'd had plenty of chances to tell her.

He shoved his hand in his pocket and pulled out the small, velvet box that had caused him to be late. He didn't have the heart to open it and be mocked by the symbol inside. The gift was supposed to be part of his apology. He knew she liked charms and hand-crafted items so he'd scoured the town for a shop that could create the design he'd imagined. Problem was, the crafter hadn't finished with his ordered trinket when he'd arrived.

"She'll never see it now," he breathed, before tossing back another burning gulp. There was no one to blame but himself. Axel sighed and swirled the ice cubes in his drink.

Kairi used to look at him like he was some kind of hero. She spoke to him like he was the best friend she'd ever had, besides Riku of course. He winced as the memories overwhelmed him; how he longed to forget the look on her face when he'd attacked Sora. The way she'd ran to protect him had enraged him, but now all he felt was a stinging remorse. Of course she'd protected him. It wasn't about who she loved more. Sora was and would always be an important part of her life. If he hadn't been so wrapped up in his own childish jealousy he might've realized that instead of acting like a complete moron. He might've even stood a chance against Sora's accusations, but instead, he played right into the image Sora had described.

_"_ _I-I can't believe this…"_

The pain in her voice was his companion as he downed his drink and rose his hand to order another. What was going to become of him now? He'd lost the woman he loved, the place he thought he belonged. She'd quickly eclipsed his world and now he couldn't imagine what life would be like without her. If only he could take it back.

* * *

 

_Kairi chased me down the sidewalk. I could hear her heavy breaths as she grabbed my arm. I turned to look at her. The sight of her teary eyes was too much for me to bear. After all, this time I'd caused her to break down._

_"_ _Axel, wait!" she breathed. I let her take a moment to catch her breath. She seemed frantic. "Let's solve this."_

_"_ _What's left to solve, Kairi?"_

_"_ _Wha-?"_

_"_ _Is there even room in your heart for me?"_

_Kairi looked mortified and dropped her grip on my arm. "You didn't give me a chance to make room. You were always jealous and worried that I was going to leave you! Why couldn't you have some faith in me? You didn't have to lie…I would've-"_

_"_ _You would've what? Chosen me?"_

_"_ _Yes! But you…you didn't give me a chance to really choose. You cared more about your own feelings than mine."_

_I frowned. "That's what you think?" She was silent. I leaned toward her and placed my hands on her shoulders. I looked into her eyes and whispered, "Kairi, just because I wanted to get something out of us being together didn't mean I didn't want you to get something out of it too."_

_She backed out of my grasp and shook her head. "What does that even mean?"_

_I reached into my pocket and retrieved the precious, charm bracelet she'd wanted. I placed it in her hand and closed her fingers over it. "I just wanted you to be happy and I thought I could make you feel that way," I confessed, searching for any sign my words were reaching her._

_Her eyes dropped from mine to the hand holding the bracelet. Slowly, her fist opened and I watched as the treasured item tumbled to the sidewalk, cracking against the pavement. I knelt to pick up the pieces, but she stopped me with her icy command._

_"_ _Don't!" She was trembling._

_"…_ _Sweetheart?"_

_"_ _I'm doing it again, aren't I?" she whispered. I reached out to her but she stepped further away from me._

_"_ _What are you talking about?"_

_"_ _I didn't want that stupid bracelet!" Kairi swore, "I wanted to be able to trust you, but now I can't believe anything that comes out of your mouth." She turned and ran from me. I watched hopelessly as she returned into the house where Sora was probably waiting for her._

_I couldn't argue, she was right. She couldn't trust me._

* * *

 

Axel chuckled darkly and held up his new glass. "Cheers to another fuck up," he joked to shake off his cringe. He'd always fancied himself as mature and intelligent, dare he say clever, but how he'd treated Kairi proved he was anything but. And he'd never get to tell her that either.

"There you are!"

Axel set the drink down, chuckling again at his best friend's sudden appearance. Roxas always seemed to know where to find him when shit hit the fan. The blonde man hopped into the stool beside him and stared him down.

Axel kept his downtrodden gaze on his glass as he asked, "What brings you to this dismal place?"

"I've been looking everywhere for you," Roxas explained, "Kairi called Xion and told her about the fight. Axel-" Roxas's eyes drifted to the bartender. He scowled. "You didn't come here to oogle the bartender, did you?"

Axel raised a brow. "Eh?" He turned his head and met the brown eyes of the bartender. How had he not noticed the attractive woman in the skimpy outfit? Kairi, that's how. "Oh...thought she was a man."

He heard Roxas's exaggerated sigh. "How much have you had?" Axel shrugged coyly. "Ugh, you're the worst drunk! Come on, I'm taking you home."

Axel's eyes widened. The word 'home' ripped through his heart chords. He had no home without Kairi, and it wasn't because he had nowhere to stay. She made him feel at home, she made him feel like he had family again. He felt something wet on his cheek. He placed his bare fingers on his face and felt the tear that had fallen. "Would you look at that," he mumbled, "I'm crying…"

Roxas sucked in a breath, seemingly horrified by his tears. "She'll forgive you," he asserted quietly, "Kairi's just upset right now, but she'll-."

Axel finally met his eyes. The look of sympathy Roxas gave him was the final blow; he could feel himself unraveling. "No, not this time, buddy. She's done with me."

"But Axel, remember when-"

"It's over, Roxas!" he suddenly shouted with a slam of his fist. Roxas flinched. Axel hated himself; how many people was he going to go off on tonight? He let out a ragged sigh and shoved some munny on the bar.

"It's over," Axel repeated quietly. He grabbed his box and shoved it back into his pocket. His feet touched the ground, but he couldn't support his weight and tumbled over with a loud 'thud'. "Little help?" he called helplessly as his eyes struggled to focus on the swirling, blonde head above him.

He heard Roxas groan and grumble, "Shit."

* * *

 

Axel staggered down the streets with Roxas supporting his weight. The blonde grunted and cursed, but Axel didn't seem to mind. In fact, he felt numbed to everything around him. Perhaps he should've cared that his lost love had called Xion. But he couldn't make himself feel anything anymore. Well, except, nausea. He felt plenty of that.

"Axel, can you please walk straight," Roxas huffed through gritted teeth.

"I thought I was," Axel chuckled. He roughly patted Roxas's head. "Sorry about this. I'm a mess without her."

"Then go back to her! I'll take you there," Roxas offered, "You did the same for me when Xion and I had that big fight a few years ago. That's why I can't be  _too_  mad at you right now."

Axel laughed, "I'm doing better than you. I haven't puked in the street!" He felt Roxas shove him. Unable to catch himself, Axel fell into a dimly, lit lamppost. "Now, that wasn't very nice!" He grimaced, as his hand struggled to grip the cold iron to prevent himself from falling onto the cobblestone.

Roxas heaved him back into a standing position. "Sorry, I didn't think I hit you that hard." Axel closed his eyes, letting Roxas pull him along. "So, come on, I'll take you to Kairi. You're both miserable without each other."

"Nah, she doesn't want me."

"Axel, I already told you-"

"Sssh!" Axel's eyes flickered open and fell upon the clocktower. It was five minutes to the new year. "Roxas, you ever heard of the New Year's legend?"

Roxas rolled his eyes. "No, but I have a feeling you're going to tell me, anyway."

"Such a smart cookie," Axel cooed with another rough pat, "They say who you are with at the stroke of the new year is who you're destined to be with the rest of your life."

"Guess I'm stuck with you then. Xion won't be happy to hear that."

Roxas's words fell on deaf ears; Axel was too lost in his own thoughts of Kairi. She'd looked stunning even as she yelled at him that he was a jealous child. He could still hear her laugh, smell her sweet scent, and feel how her slender frame fit with his. He would've given anything to have her next to him right now.

The pair paused to rest against the side of an empty shop. Axel's eyes never left the clock face as time ticked closer to midnight. When the hand finally struck, his heart sunk.

"Who was I kidding? She was never mine."

"Axel?" Roxas called, waving his hand in front of his face. "Did you hear me?"

Axel wanted to shake his head but he might've actually puked if he did that. "Sorry. What?"

"Never mind, anyway. I probably should wait to tell you this, but you're just going to have to listen hard," Roxas began, "Kairi is the nicest woman you've ever been with. I can see why you love her."

"Uh oh, these feelings are going to make me puke."

"I know what you did, all of it. The lying, the stealing, the meddling. And instead of repeating what Xion told me to tell you, I'll just say this. Axel, what the fuck? You're usually so charismatic and good at reading signals…so how?"

Axel lifted himself from the wall, only to collapse toward it again. He rested his head against the brick and groaned, "No, I really am going to puke."

Roxas kept talking. "You know we both love you. You're our best friend, no matter what. But damn it, you've crossed the line this time."

"I-I know," Axel gasped.

"Do you?" Roxas accused, "She told us you scared the shit out of her!"

He couldn't look at anything but ground beneath him. "She…said that?"

"Okay, not in those words, but basically. Axel, you've been with Kairi every day since you moved there. You must've known hiding all of that from her was going to blow up in your face."

"I-uh, I fucked up."

"You don't say? I've never seen you this way. This isn't you. Talk to me. Why did you do all of that?" Axel gagged. "Just let it out already, geez." So, he did. Axel retched pathetically onto the cobblestone, barely holding himself up with his forehead and hand.

Axel groaned once he was done. He would've happily collapsed into his own puddle of fluids but Roxas grabbed his arm and dragged him away from the scene. Before he knew it, he was plonked down onto a bench. He wished he was unconscious so he didn't have to answer Roxas, but he was painfully aware of everything. Especially the fact that Roxas was sitting next to him, glaring holes into his paled face.

"Roxas," he began hoarsely, "I didn't mean to meddle like that-"

Roxas shushed him as a car parked in front of them. The window of the driver's seat rolled down to reveal Xion's blue glare. "I would've been here earlier but I had to clear out the party and console Kairi," she grumbled, "Did he puke? He looks awful."

"Thanks," Axel groaned, not bothering to lift his head from its awkward, lax position on his shoulder.

"Well, get him in," Xion ordered, "I covered the backseat in towels and plastic bags so he doesn't ruin the upholstery on the drive there."

"Drive where?" Axel questioned as Roxas yanked him to his feet. He was surprised that his legs felt less like jelly as he stepped into the car and managed to buckle his own seatbelt. Roxas sat next to him and shut the door.

"You're coming home with us, duh."


	33. Reflection

Kairi sat in the center of the guest bed, clutching the canary yellow sheets as she flipped through an old photo album. It was one of her, Sora, and Riku in their early college days. She smiled sadly as she relived the scenes in each of the pictures. Her eyes hesitated on a photo of Sora running after a bus in a pair of baggy shorts that didn't match his orange, Twilight U t-shirt. The first time Sora had tried to navigate them around town on the bus had been a disaster. As it turned out, Sora couldn't read a map to save his life. Thank goodness they never took that raft voyage…

The next photo was of Sora and Riku attempting to climb the gate of the abandoned mansion. Riku was sitting on the ledge, laughing at Sora who'd fallen after his seventh attempt. Kairi flipped a few pages and let her eyes sink into a picture of herself and Sora on Sunset Hill. Riku had taken it without either of them realizing. Sora had his arms wrapped around her as they gazed into the sunset. It was sweet.

She frowned. They were so young. She felt she hardly recognized the girl and boy in the picture. So many things had changed despite her fervent wish that they never would.

She gazed around the bedroom that was still littered with Axel's belongings. He hadn't taken anything with him when he left two days ago. She could spot a few of his black tees on the dresser and a pair of pants she'd probably pulled off him herself on the ground. Kairi grimaced, letting her head sink into her hands.

Part of her wanted to rush out of the home and search the entire city for him, but the other part wanted to say 'good riddance' and forget she'd ever been with him. He'd  _lied_  on purpose. What future could she possibly have with a liar?

"Kairi!"

She jumped at the sound of her name. "I'm in here!"

Riku appeared in the doorway with a yellow rose in his hand. The gesture softened her heart. "How'd you get in?" she asked as she climbed off the mattress. He tossed a key to her which she caught in the palm of her hand. "Sora's key?"

"Thought it was about time he surrendered that," Riku replied, holding out the flower for her to take. Kairi breathed in the scent, soothed by the earthy smell. "How're you holding up?"

"I'm not sure. I'm so…confused."

Riku gestured to the bed. "Want to sit?"

Kairi flushed. "I haven't changed the sheets on the bed yet…"

He cleared his throat and took a step back. "Ah, couch then."

Kairi followed him to the living room, wishing she wasn't so flustered by the thought of her time spent with Axel. They sat on the couch and stared at the blank television screen. There was so much she wanted to ask Riku, but she had no idea where to start. Too much information was tumbling around in her head and it was taking all her mental energy to try and sort it out.

"Are you disappointed with me?" Riku asked, his deep voice sounded smaller than usual.

She shook her head. "No, of course not."

"I kept him from you too, you know."

Kairi sighed, "But it's different. You didn't deceive me."

"Yeah, but I never made it clear to Axel that he should be the one to tell you what happened that day, either."

She eyed him. "Riku, it's not your responsibility to make sure everyone does the right thing. I think you're burdening yourself the same way Sora burdened himself."

He smirked but the gesture didn't reach his eyes. "You're probably right." Kairi wished she could've argued with him more, but she was at a loss for words. "Are you done with Axel?"

Her eyes widened. "Of course. How can you ask that?"

Riku placed his hand on hers. "I just wondered, is all. With Sora around, did you even get to talk to him about the reasons behind what he did?"

She pulled her hand from his. Since when did Riku side with Axel? "Isn't it obvious? It's like Sora said, he was trying to manipulate me into his bed. What else do I need to hear?" Kairi grumbled, "I'm surprised you'd even ask me that."

"Hm. That just doesn't sound like Axel."

She dug her fingers into the couch cushion. Riku wasn't wrong. That behavior didn't seem like Axel, but what did they know? Axel could've easily put on a persona and fooled them into thinking he was something he wasn't. Kairi had reflected on his behavior heavily since he'd left. Axel had  _let_ her cry,  _let_ her believe the worst of Sora, and convinced her that he cared about her more.

"I don't understand why you're defending him," Kairi muttered, "He hurt me."

Riku shrugged. "I wouldn't say I'm defending him. I'm just suggesting that you haven't examined the whole picture. I know he hurt you, Kai. And don't mistake me, I'm not pleased about that at all."

"The whole picture?" Kairi frowned. What more was there to see?

"Yes, think about it some more. Think about Axel."

She hesitated. "He…He's crude and infuriating!" She shook her head furiously. "Ever since he moved in, he lounged around and gave his opinion when it wasn't wanted. Did you know he took my wedding planning book and filled it with notes of things he thought I could do better? He didn't even ask! And then, I'm sure now he was listening to my argument with Sora. How else would he have known the lamp was broken when Sora pushed me? He was sticking his nose where it didn't belong, telling me that Sora was treating me poorly, encouraging me to stop wasting my time."

Her shoulders slumped as she sunk into her memories. "He told me once that if I had a dream, I shouldn't wait, I should act. Whenever we argued about Sora and I started apologizing, he told me I shouldn't be sorry. Even after I confronted Sora about his cheating and fell for his lies, Axel told me he'd be happy if I was…"

"Mm. Are you complimenting him or criticizing him?" Riku questioned. He'd reclined into the couch, arms behind his head, as he lazily studied her through his bangs.

Kairi faltered. "I'm not sure. Axel is annoying and he knows how to push my buttons, but he also supported me. He visited Sora at work. He got you to visit and if you had never come here, I don't know if I would have ever found out about Naminé. But he shouldn't have told Sora that I called off our engagement!"

Riku raised a brow. "When did he do that?"

"Apparently the day he kept Sora away from me. Sora said Axel spoke for me and told him our engagement was over."

Riku sat up and scooted closer to Kairi. "When did he tell you that?"

"During the argument. Sora yelled at Axel that he thought I'd ended the engagement when Axel told him it was over. And then he added that he'd hid the bracelet so I'd think Sora had ended it and Axel could move in on me."

Riku blinked. "…And you believed that?"

Kairi flustered. "Well, yes?"

"I was there, Kai. Sora's memory of that time is swayed by his emotion. I remember I'd taken him inside to get his belongings because I, also, didn't want him talking to you then. He was about to give some speech about how you were his fiancé and Axel interrupted him. He didn't say you'd ended it, he was challenging Sora's belief. He said something like, 'Do you seriously believe she'll still have you?'" Kairi blanched. "As for the bracelet, I can't speak for that. The only one that can give you the explanation you want is Axel."

She shut her eyes, absorbing the information. Axel hadn't spoken for her. But he did keep the bracelet and he didn't tell her what had happened between him and Sora. Why? "Riku…what are you trying to tell me?"

"Only that you should think about this thoroughly before you make a decision."

"But he lied."

"Is one deception bigger than everything else he's done? That's the decision you need to make. And Kai, I don't care what decision you make, I will be with you no matter what. But I do care that you think this through, you owe that to yourself. Trust your heart, not what someone else has told you."

Kairi could feel her heart pounding in her chest. Riku was right. After everything, it should've been obvious she couldn't just take someone else's word for anything. The only truth she would be able to find was the truth in her heart. She placed her hand on her chest and took in a deep breath.

"You're right, Riku. I need to think about this some more." She felt his arm slip around her shoulder. Instinctively, she leaned into it, seeking the comfort his embrace would provide. "But Riku, this is so painful, I don't know how I can face this."

He squeezed her arm. "What did I tell you before? You don't have to be strong, just willing."

She smiled into his chest. "Right. I remember now." Kairi froze. She also remembered something else. She lifted her head and eyed Riku steadily. "Should we talk about what your dad said at the party?"

Riku jolted underneath her. "What?"

She giggled. "Thought I forgot?"

"More like hoped."

Kairi grinned. "I'll never forget the hope twinkling in your dad's eyes as he described how you'd come home grumbling with jealousy!" she laughed.

Riku groaned, dropping his head into his palm. "Come on, Kairi! That was a long time ago!"

"I know, that's why I have to make up for it with teasing now." She poked his cheek, laughing at his impassive expression. "I never pegged you as the jealous type, you know. You're so stoic."

He blew out some air, scattering pieces of his silver bang over his forehead. "Everyone feels jealousy, Kairi. Some just handle it better than others."

The words seemed to ring a gong in her mind. She leapt from her seat on the couch, trembling with excitement. "Of course!" she cried, beginning to pace the room, "Axel doesn't handle jealousy well!" She missed Riku's smirk as she circled the space between the couch and the television. "I've thought so hard about how Axel could have changed from being so sweet and supportive and into someone so angry and violent. He was consumed by his jealousy!"

"Axel jealous of Sora? Imagine."

Kairi cut her eyes at him. "This is what you wanted me to realize, isn't it?" He feigned disinterest. "Don't play coy with me, Riku. I understand now. And you're right." She paused. "He was always comparing himself to Sora. Reminding me that he wasn't him. Acting sensitively whenever he seemed to appear out of nowhere. Constantly fearing that I was going to go back to him. I was silly not to notice what it was doing to him. It all makes sense now. I thought it was because he didn't trust me, but he was just afraid."

She stopped walking, pausing in the middle of the living room. "And I-I slapped him…" Her hands found their way to her hair, tangling between its red strands. "He's never going to talk to me again, is he? I slapped him and I ran away from him. Riku, what have I done?"

"Kairi-"

"I was just so angry and felt so betrayed, I couldn't even see that it was never about me. It was his own feelings he couldn't deal with. No wonder he told me I should go to the island!" She hesitated again. "No wonder he kept sputtering apologies and hesitating when we were together the first time. He was comparing himself…he was feeling guilty."

"Kairi, stop-"

"He wouldn't even kiss me until I took that ring off my finger. And no wonder he got so upset at the party when I told Selphie we weren't together. It was right after we'd been talking about Sora. A-And he walked in right as I was telling Sora that I'd always," she nearly choked, "that I'd always love him. I accused him of not having faith in me, but I was the one who never understood what he was going through."

Riku seized her shoulders. She stumbled out of her remorseful trance. "Kairi, there's no use wallowing in your mistakes. It's not going to change anything," he urged.

Kairi nodded slowly. "You're right. I have to take action. I have to find him and discuss this properly. I owe that to myself." She smiled and pulled him into a hug. "Thank you, Riku. You always know what to say."

He chuckled, "I didn't say much of anything, Kai."

"Exactly."


	34. Hesitation

Axel shivered, rubbing his arms through his black coat. "Why are we here in the middle of winter?" he hissed through chattering teeth, "We're going to freeze our asses off."

"Because it's peaceful," Xion answered, adjusting her position as she dangled her feet over the edge of the clock tower, "Plus, the moon looks beautiful tonight."

He'd crashed on Roxas and Xion's couch the night Roxas had found him in the bar. The next day he'd left, retrieved his car, and began making his own living arrangements. His goal was to drop off the grid for a while, but Roxas had tracked him down again and told him to show up at the clocktower.

"I'm still not understanding," Axel huffed, watching the warmth of his breath drift away into the darkness.

"Good, 'cause we don't understand you either," Roxas quipped, "Kairi's great. Why'd you mess it up?"

Axel sighed. He should've known they'd called him out to talk. All their serious, group discussions happened on this tower.

"We couldn't have this discussion in the warmth of your home?" Axel grumbled, "Or could we have come here when the sun was still up?"

"Complaining won't get us home any quicker, but a confession will," Xion teased, "So spill."

Axel scratched his head. They were going to ice him out, literally. "Guess I have no choice," he groaned. He took in a deep breath and began to explain. "I didn't mean to mess it up. I was going to tell her the truth so many times but I didn't."

"But why'd you do it in the first place?" Roxas asked, "You're not even the jealous type. Every relationship you've ever been in has been open. Larxene used to flirt with other guys in front of you all the time and you'd just laugh it off."

"It wasn't intentional," he argued, "After finding her on the floor, I felt so protective. She's so sweet and forgiving to a fault. You didn't see how she would roll over and let Sora trample over her."

He paused, letting the emotions stirring in his stomach settle again. "When I told Sora that the engagement was over, I didn't mean to sound like Kairi's messenger, I thought I was stating the obvious! He betrayed her. Why would she still marry him? But she was right, I shouldn't have decided her feelings for her," he confessed with a long sigh, "And I should've 'fessed up to having the bracelet when she asked for it the first time. But she was still crying every hour and I thought if I gave it to her she'd just get worse. Every time she said his name, she backpedaled."

"She might not have if she'd known the truth," Xion suggested, "Did you ever think what really tore her apart might not have been that Sora cheated, but that he'd morphed into a man she couldn't recognize? If you'd at least mentioned that he came by, she might've recovered faster."

"I know, I'm an idiot."

"Yeah, you are, but a well-intentioned idiot," Xion agreed with a sly smile, "So, tell us more about this jealousy thing. You're usually so confident, I'm surprised you feel threatened by Sora at all."

"He knew that I loved her." Axel shuddered from the chill in the air and the one inside his core. "When he came that day, he called me out on it. Ever since then, I've felt like he's in my head, messing with me. Every time things seem all right between Kairi and I, he's there. It can't be a coincidence."

Roxas raised a brow. "Do you know how paranoid you sound?"

"Yes. And I hate it," he sneered, "She's the first woman I ever loved. I just wanted to do it right. Sweep her off her feet, make her feel special, but how could I when Sora already defined romance for her?"

Xion turned her head and glared at him. "You thought whining about how she didn't love you was going to charm her?" she deadpanned. Axel grimaced. "Don't get me wrong, you definitely left an impression on her. She never had any bad things to say about you until now."

"You know, Axel, you've got to learn to take your own advice," Roxas piped in, "I was in the same position as you once. I'd fallen in love with Xion and I felt threatened and hopeless if I even imagined I wasn't good enough for her."

Xion giggled and placed her hand over his, "I'll never forget how grouchy you used to get, Rox."

He laughed, "Grouchy is an understatement." He shook his head with a smile Axel was surprised to see. He could clearly remember those days and they were quite tumultuous. Between Roxas's outbursts and Xion's self-blame and threats to leave, Axel hardly had a moment's rest. "My attitude nearly ruined everything. And if Axel hadn't talked some sense into me it would have. I'll never forget what you told me."

"Care to remind me?"

"You told me to trust Xion's judgement."

Ah, he remembered now. Roxas had been so consumed by the idea that Xion would be better off with someone else that he couldn't see that Xion wanted him as much as he wanted her. Axel wanted to kick himself. He'd fallen into the same trap of insecurity. Instead of trusting Kairi to know what was best for her, he'd worried about his own worthiness.

Axel felt even more foolish, if that was even possible. How could he praise Kairi for being so kind-hearted, forgiving, and loyal when in the back of his mind he was constantly concerned about her being close-minded, callous, and fickle? He hadn't trusted her at all.

"I wish I could apologize," he muttered.

"What do you mean? Just apologize to her, it's easy," Xion urged, "Besides, from the way Kairi described things it doesn't sound like you two actually talked about the root of the problem. You just yelled at each other until one of you walked away."

He smirked sadly. "I deserved it, though."

Xion smiled softly. "Axel, you're not a bad man, okay? I know you can walk the line and make some poor choices, but you're not bad. You deserve to be with someone that loves you as much as the next person. But you have to let whoever that is decide for themselves what they want, okay?"

Axel tapped his temple. "I'll commit it to memory."

"So tomorrow you can go back and apologize to her," Roxas concluded with a nod.

Axel shook his head. "No, I don't think so."

"What?" Roxas and Xion both exclaimed.

"I'm not going to show up unannounced. I know, firsthand, how much it bothered her when Sora did that. I messed up and I lost her. I just have to live with my mistakes."

Xion groaned, shaking her head. "Axel, this is different. You're going to apologize for being awful to her. Sora showed up to beg for her back and give her excuses!"

Axel frowned. "Who's to say if I show up at her door that I won't act the same way? My whole history with her shows that I fuck up good intentions. I'm not going to disturb her anymore. Kairi deserves some peace. She certainly hasn't had any since I moved in."

"Axel, no," Roxas replied with a frown of his own, "Don't start this. You're already predicting her reaction. You can't know what she's thinking unless you go and ask her."

Axel stood, staring over the ledge of the tower. Twilight Town looked dark and peaceful underneath them. "I can't trust myself when I'm with her. She'll be happier without me."

Xion also stood, inching closer to him. Somehow, she felt taller than him as she stared him down. "Do you really believe that?" she questioned.

"I don't know what to believe anymore."

* * *

A day hadn't passed where Kairi didn't think of her fight with Axel and wonder how she could've been so cruel. How could she condemn Axel for being insecure when she'd faced the same problems herself? The more she thought about it, the more sense it made that he would have developed an inferiority complex when it came to her ex-fiancé. The man had watched her cry and pine over Sora from the day he'd first moved in.

_"_ _Is there even room in your heart for me?"_

Kairi groaned miserably. He'd practically spelled out everything for her and she'd never caught on. Axel had always been the one to share what he felt. He'd patiently waited for her to sort out her feelings. Kairi had been the one making him hang in limbo by hiding and causing miscommunication.

She pushed through the doors of the community college and glanced around. The white halls were eerily deserted. Kairi supposed the emptiness was because the students were still on their holiday vacation. She wondered why Axel would be here, but she didn't want to question Xion's information. She barely had any information about Axel's whereabouts as it was. His phone was disconnected and he'd left his laptop in his old room. The only people he seemed to talk to were Xion and Roxas, and they weren't even 100% sure where he was or what he was doing since he'd left their place.

Kairi carefully studied the numbers attached to each of the classroom doors. She didn't want to walk into the wrong room and pour her heart out. She'd already embarrassed herself enough. She stopped in front of the door numbered '2100'. Her heartbeat quickened. Her mind couldn't forget the anger and hatred in his eyes as he yelled at her to go back to Sora. He'd looked so different from the man she chased outside.

_I owe it to myself to figure out why_ , she thought.

Taking in a sharp breath, she pushed through the door and poked her head inside the class. The medium-sized room was empty. She walked past the rows of metal desks to the front of the classroom. It looked like Axel had been there, judging from the neat cursive that was written on the white board. She frowned as her eyes paused on his signature. "I must've just missed him…"

Her eyes fell on the black, dry erase marker lying on the instructor's podium. She grabbed it and quickly scribbled a note to Axel on the side of his board. Hopefully, he'd see it and respond.

_Please come home. - Kairi_

She capped the marker and placed it back where she found it. With a heavy heart, she quietly exited the classroom and headed toward the front doors of the campus. If only she'd turned her head, she might've seen Axel stepping into the restroom or the janitor entering his classroom to clean the board.

* * *

Temptation can only be fought off so long before it's indulged. The sentence might as well have been Axel's life motto. Especially when it came to Kairi.

He was weak, helpless, and such a fool. Every night he dreamt of her. Her beautiful smile, the way her eyes lit up when she said his name, the rich, lilac scent of her hair…all of it invaded his sleep. It was torture but he was grateful. At least, he could have her in his dreams.

Axel had tried hard to make himself adapt to his reality without her, but every step he took toward bitter acceptance, he took two steps back. He'd parked his car outside the townhome three times already, trying to convince himself to go inside and apologize. Each time, he couldn't stomach it. The thought of looking at her face evoked such powerful emotions that he couldn't compose himself long enough to open the car door. What was it about her that made her so terrifying?

Kairi wasn't exactly intimidating. He towered over her in height. He was stronger than her. Axel had never had a reason to fear her. Well, mostly. Her slap was still well-memorized. It certainly wasn't an event he wanted to relive.

Roxas and Xion told him he needed to face her, that it wouldn't be as bad as he imagined, but he couldn't believe them. He loved them, he trusted them, but they hadn't been there. They hadn't seen the way he'd yelled at her or the way she'd matched his anger. There was no way Kairi would be willing to listen to him.

Xion often passionately reminded him how Kairi had given Sora chance after chance, but Axel wasn't convinced by that either. Sora was Kairi's first love, her only love. Of course Kairi was going to give him unlimited chances! Axel was just some guy that had moved in because he had nowhere to live, and had somehow wormed his way into her heart just to let her down. Why would she give him another chance? Why did he even deserve one?

He leaned against the wall of her office building with his arms crossed over his chest. Axel wasn't sure why he was standing there in the middle of the afternoon. It wasn't like she was going to sense his presence and come running to make up with him.

Axel groaned.  _I'm no different than Sora right now._

"I'm coming out right now, are you in your car?"

Axel's heart nearly leapt out of his mouth. He quickly ducked behind the nearest column as Kairi came running out of the building in her snug, pencil skirt and floral blouse. She looked beautiful as she hurried to a dark blue car that he recognized as Riku's.

He let out a sigh once they'd driven away. That was too close.

"Coward."

Axel jumped. Hayner was standing next to him with a cigarette between his teeth. There was a bored look in his brown eyes as he shook his head. "She wants to see you, you know."

"Heh, right," Axel scoffed.

Hayner rolled his eyes. "Get over yourself and make up with her already. I'm tired of seeing her so miserable." He yanked the cigarette from his mouth and stomped it into the ground. "Plus, Olette keeps going over there…"

Axel smirked. "Ah, so that's what this is really about."

He shrugged. "What? I miss my girl. You miss yours too. Go make up so we can both be happy." Hayner stretched his arms and waved. "See you around."

His smirk deflated to a frown. If only it was so easy to just make up and be happy.

* * *

"But I went there and I didn't see him!" Kairi cried, "I went in his classroom and I left a note on his whiteboard telling him to come home."

Xion grimaced. "Ooh, I think I know what happened there." Kairi raised a brow. "Axel told me the other day how the janitors annoyingly clean his white board every afternoon even though he clearly marks for it to not be erased."

Kairi groaned and fell back against her bed. "This shouldn't be so hard," she whined.

Olette comfortingly patted her leg. "Oh, Kairi, I'm sorry. But you'll get through to him," she assured with a small smile, "Just don't give up."

The redhead covered her face with her hands. "I'm not even sure he wants to see me!"

It was Xion's turn to groan. "I've already told you multiple times that he's a wreck without you. Axel wants to see you and you want to see him. Ugh, if he'd just tell me and Roxas where he was staying I'd take you there myself and leave you until you made up!" she declared.

Kairi peeked at Xion through her fingers. "But what if we can't make up?" she whispered, "I didn't listen and I judged him and I-"

Xion shook her head. "Roxas and I say stupid things to each other all the time. Doesn't mean we don't love each other. Learn from it and do better."

"But I couldn't even tell Axel that I loved him," Kairi argued, "He was so hurt. The way we left things…he probably thinks I'll never be able to love him!" Kairi whined again and rolled onto her side, bumping her legs into Olette.

"Axel knows better than anyone how hard it is for you to love and trust," Olette countered. She maneuvered herself out of the way of Kairi's legs and reclined closer to Xion. "Once he gets past his hurt feelings, he'll be able to see that. But the two of you aren't going to move forward if you don't see each other."

Kairi frowned. Olette was right. Axel did know that; he'd just gotten carried away in a wave of negative feelings. She was confident she might have reacted the same if she'd come home and seen him embracing Larxene, telling her he'd always love her. Well, 'might' was an understatement, she would've been belligerent.

"Should I go back to the school?" she asked, "Is there any other place he goes?"

"Did you try the clocktower?" Xion suggested.

Kairi bolted from the mattress. "Of course!" She grabbed Xion and Olette's hands. "That's where he'll be. He once told me it calms him more than any other place."

"Besides rolling around in bed with you, I presume," Xion joked with a smirk.

Kairi flushed and smacked her arm. "Stop that! You're just as bad as he is!" Xion laughed. "And for the record, he's anything but calm in bed with me."

"Gah!" Olette cried, "Too much information!"

Xion playfully narrowed her eyes. "Don't act so innocent. Kairi told me how she caught you and Hayner in the parking lot.

Olette let out a shriek and grabbed a pillow. She smacked Xion's face with it before she could say any more. The raven-haired woman nearly tumbled to the floor. "Hey!"

Kairi laughed as she watched the two women chase each other around her bedroom. She didn't know what she would do without them, and she wouldn't have had them in the first place if it hadn't been for Axel. Had he made a mistake that he wasn't sure how to fix? Is that why he hadn't told her? She had to know.

_This time, I'll listen to you, Axel._

* * *

Axel was driving himself crazy. He was stuck ruminating on actions he couldn't change and it had put him in his foulest mood to date. Thus, he'd sought solace in his favorite place; the clocktower. He was sure he could escape the 'should have's and 'could have's there.

He moved to take a step forward, but was forced to jump out of the way of a teenage skateboarder. The young boy called back an apology as he rolled away, but the damage was already done. Axel glared holes into the sea salt ice cream that had been splattered on the sidewalk next to him.

"I can't catch a break, can I?" he grumbled as he bent down to pluck the stick from the blue mess. He read the message on the side. "Try again next time. Go figure."

A sudden smirk formed on his lips. He knew exactly what he was going to do with his popsicle stick. Axel hurried over to the edge of the plaza and looked down toward the lower parts of town. His vengeful eyes quickly found the boy that had spoiled his ice cream, and lucky for him he wasn't too far away. Sneakily, he pulled up the black hood of his coat so he couldn't be recognized.

"Here comes sweet revenge," he chuckled.

Axel cocked back his arm to throw the stick at the boy's head, but paused halfway. He could hear Kairi's voice in his mind, reprimanding him for picking on a kid. With a kick of his shoe, he sighed and flicked the stick into the trash can nearest him.

"You win, sweetheart," he murmured, "I have to do better."

He shoved his hands in his pockets and began to walk back toward town. Axel didn't feel like going up to the clocktower anymore. If only he'd taken a last glance at the train station doors, he might've seen Kairi run inside.

* * *

Kairi waited on the clocktower until the sun had mostly set. She rubbed her arms through the winter coat she was wearing. It'd been obvious to her an hour or so ago that Axel wasn't coming, but she hadn't allowed herself to give up hope. Now, she was chilled to the bone.

She trudged down the stairs with a sigh.  _I really hoped he was going to show up._

Though, there was a part of her that was also grateful he hadn't. Instead of rehearsing what she'd wanted to say, she'd spent most of her time panicking. Kairi wasn't sure what she could say to Axel. Any apology she could come up with didn't feel genuine and any question she thought she might ask seemed accusatory. The last thing she wanted to do was fight again. She was tired of fighting.

She pushed through the doors of the train station and shuffled across the plaza. She now regretted taking the bus, because she would have to wait outside in the cold air. As if the day couldn't get any worse, her next step was into a puddle.

Kairi whined and looked down at the strange, blue liquid that was coating her beige boots. "Just my luck!" she cried as she tried to shake it off. She shook her head at herself; she was reacting like Axel would.

"Kairi?"

She ripped her eyes from her sticky situation and met Sora's. He was staring at her with an odd expression on his tanned face. She blushed from pure embarrassment. She didn't want Sora to see her this way.

"I-uh, stepped in something," she blurted out.

Sora chuckled, "Yeah, looks like it. What are you doing out here?"

She frowned. "I was waiting."

Recognition flittered through his eyes. "Oh, for Axel, right?" She nodded. "Guess he didn't come?"

Kairi sighed, "No, he didn't." Sora paused, looking like he wanted to say more. Before he could, Kairi asked, "What are you doing out here?"

"I was going to grab some dinner near Sunset Hill," he answered before pausing again, "You wouldn't…you wouldn't want to join me, would you?" Kairi sucked in a breath. "I don't mean as a date or anything, unless you wanted to that is, but I thought you probably wouldn't…but I'm hungry and you look hungry so maybe we could-if you wanted. But you don't have to! I just thought as friends-"

Kairi laughed, loudly. "Sora, it's okay! I'll go. You're right, I am hungry."

She watched as a grin spread across his face. "Okay! It's on me, though, all right? Least I can do after all the trouble I've caused you."

"Fine with me, lead the way."

She followed behind Sora, careful not to step into any more spills. He'd been behaving more like himself lately. It seemed ever since the fight with Axel, he'd become more like the sweet, goofy boy she'd grown up with. He'd stopped showing up unannounced, stopped forcing his feelings on her, and he'd even been completely honest with Riku. She was proud of him.

* * *

"So, when are you planning on telling us where you're staying?" Roxas asked between bites of his lamb gyro.

Xion nodded. "Yeah, the mystery is making me worry."

Axel chuckled and shrugged. "I'll tell you when I feel like it." Truth was he was certain Roxas and Xion would not like the fact he'd paid for a month's stay in an inn when he could've been at their home. He didn't want to argue with the couple about his decision; plus, he was tired of relying on his friend's hospitality.

Roxas cut his eyes at him. "Just like you'll reconnect your phone when you feel like it?"

Axel put up his hands. "Whoa, I'm not trying to get into that argument again!"

"But Axel, what if something happens and we can't reach you?" Xion argued, "Or what if something happens to you and you can't reach, well, anybody! It's not safe. Plus, Kairi really has been trying to contact you."

"Heh, now you sound just like Stapler Boy." Roxas and Xion eyed each other. It was apparent to Axel he'd never shared his nickname for Hayner. He decided he'd clue them in on it later, though. "Look, I just need to separate myself for a while so I can sort through some things."

Roxas rolled his eyes. "You're not fooling anyone, Axel. We all know you mean Kairi."

"I see her all the time, Axel. I'm not lying to you when I say she's been trying to see you," Xion chimed in, "She really feels bad about what happened between you two."

_"_ _Why couldn't you have some faith in me?"_

Axel hesitated, fighting off the sting of Kairi's memory. Xion was not the type of person to lie. And Roxas would never set him off on a wild goose chase. He sighed and resigned himself to their questioning. It was time to let them in.

"I've gone and parked outside her place several times now. I even went to her workplace once," he confessed uncomfortably, "If she's been trying to see me too…I don't know how we've managed to miss each other."

"It's because both of you give up before the other shows up," Xion accused with a wave of her fork, "You need to sit there and not leave till she shows up, or at least tell us your address, I'll literally leave her on your doorstep."

"Ha, nice try, Xion. Using Kairi to get my address, you're clever, but you can't out clever me," he joked.

Xion turned to Roxas. "Why does he always hide behind humor when he's uncomfortable?" she questioned with a pout.

Roxas smirked. "Because he can't handle emotions. It's a shame, really. Guess Kairi will never know how much he actually cares."

Axel rolled his eyes. "You know your mind games aren't going to work on me, right?"

"Did you even knock on the door when you went to her place?" Xion asked.

"…No."

"Gah!" she cried, "Both of you are ridiculous!" Axel hid his smile. He felt happier knowing that he and Kairi had something in common. "Have you been to the clocktower recently?"

He shrugged. "Once."

"Well go again, she's been looking for you," Xion insisted with a huff, "She's going to catch a cold waiting for you up there."

Axel frowned. Knowing that she was waiting for him filled him with a thick mixture of anxiety and hope. He wasn't sure if he wanted to run to the clocktower or away from it.


	35. Caution

Kairi swirled the wine in her flute glass with a bored expression. She was standing in the middle of the crowd that had amassed for the Twilight U Research Expo, or as Kairi called it, Sora and Riku's Party. She'd gone every year and wondered why she was there each time. It was horribly dull and she never had anything to say to anyone. After all, she'd only taken an introductory psychology class. She was lucky if she could even remember a tenth of the material she'd memorized in college. All attempts led down a dangerous trail to penis envy, and well, she didn't want to be  _that_ person. Her evening might have been more interesting if Olette had attended, but the brunette was off on a date with Hayner instead.

At least, she could enjoy the ambience. Kairi had to admit the psychology department knew how to decorate. Rather than an expo, the large, conference room looked like it had been dressed for a party. The glass décor, pristine, table cloths, dessert table, and sparkling champagne flutes set the mood. Each presenter was dressed in his or her finest attire and the guests looked as though they were going to the opera. Kairi glanced down at her own pencil skirt and blouse and grimaced. She wished she'd at least worn heels instead of flats.

She sighed and swirled her drink again.  _I'm here for Sora and Riku. I just need to remember that._

"Hey."

Kairi turned. Riku had finally managed to rip himself away from what Axel would've called 'stuffy, old guys'. "Riku," she breathed with relief. Her eyes studied the dark blue suit he'd donned for the occasion. Riku had always cleaned up well, even as a teenager. Given his usual, athletic attire, Kairi was always amazed that he had such an impeccable taste in clothing. She had to stop herself from touching the shimmering, aquamarine tie he was wearing. She composed herself and lamented, "I was starting to lose my mind."

He chuckled, "Sorry. I know this must be boring for you." She smiled apologetically. "But it means a lot that you come and support us every year. I hope you know that."

Kairi nodded. "Of course. I am happy to support you, but you're right, it is a bit boring." She giggled, "Sora seems to be in his element, though." Both their eyes turned to the animated brunette that was entertaining a crowd of older psychologists. They seemed to hang on his every word.

"See Axel yet?" Riku questioned. To avoid answering his question, Kairi sipped her wine. "I'll take that as a no."

She winced and twirled a piece of hair in her hand. "I haven't had any luck. But Riku-"

"I'll track him down and drag him to you with my bare hands if you want," he offered with a serious expression. Kairi blanched. The last thing she wanted was to force Axel to talk to her with more violence. Riku suddenly laughed, "I was joking. I know you're capable of fighting your own battles."

She let out the breath she'd been holding. She felt silly for taking him seriously. "Thanks, Riku."

"And how are things with you and Sora? I noticed you've been spending time with him again."

She stopped to think. Kairi hadn't realized it, but she had been spending more time with Sora. Ever since he found her at the clocktower, they'd spent a least a half hour together a week. She'd run into him at the Twilight Town Farmer's Market and they'd decided to eat lunch together. He'd popped by the townhome looking for his maroon tie and she'd helped him realize the tie didn't match the outfit he'd put together. Sora had even personally invited her to this event by visiting her office and dropping off a hot chocolate.

"I think they're fine," she replied as she watched the man in question gesture excitedly with his hands. She wondered what he was trying to explain. "He's still hoping for more, though, isn't he?"

Riku nodded. "He is."

Kairi shook her head. Sora's behavior still confused her. She didn't understand why he'd risked their relationship in the first place if she meant so much to him. "I know you told me Naminé refused to talk to you, but even I can't help but be curious about what led to Sora cheating on me with her. She's not here tonight, right?"

"No, she's not. She's only an adjunct."

"Oh." Kairi wasn't sure if she was relieved or disappointed. She wished she could at least catch a glimpse of the woman that had come between them.

"Riku! Kairi!"

She waved to Sora as he approached them. He was beaming. "How're you guys?" he asked, "This is pretty great, right?"

Kairi laughed. Sora had a smudge of chocolate on his chin. He'd clearly hit the dessert table in between mingling sessions. "Clean your face," she instructed with a smile.

He blushed and quickly rubbed the chocolate off with the back of his hand. "Thanks, Kai."

"We were just chatting," Kairi answered, "I'm so proud of you both. It's hard to believe you two were ever the over competitive, messy boys I grew up with on the island. Well, sorta." She winked.

"Don't loop me in with him. Sora was the messy one," Riku teased with a smirk.

"Hey!"

The three laughed. Kairi's heart felt lighter than it had in so long. She'd missed the time they used to spend together. She watched with a knowing smile as Sora and Riku argued over who was the most competitive. Sora was stomping his foot and Riku was laughing with an impassive expression. If she took away their dark suits and replaced them with their island clothes, it'd feel like they were teenagers again. If only she could have known how fleeting those days would be, she would've treasured them even more than she already did.

"Winner has to edit the other's article?" Riku suddenly suggested.

"Deal!"

She blinked. "Wait, what are you two betting on now?"

"Who gets the most visitor's at their poster," Sora answered with a grin, "I've already got a few more than Riku, though."

Kairi shook her head. Some things never changed. Another frown formed on her lips as her thoughts drifted. Axel probably had the same thought she did, that things never changed. He probably told himself that countless times to justify his belief that she would never be able to love him. If only he could have known how far from the truth that was. If only he would've talked to her about his insecurities…

"Riku!"

The trio turned their head in the direction of the gruff voice. A tanned, elderly man with a bit of a hunched back was calling to Riku with an extended, gloved hand.

"I'll be back," Riku promised before departing to see what the man wanted.

Kairi glanced toward Sora. He was already looking at her. He seemed wistful as his stare intensified. She hated to admit that his gaze was making her uncomfortable. Since when did Sora make her uncomfortable?

"Sora?" she questioned with a quirked brow when she couldn't stand the silence any longer.

He cleared his throat. "I-uh, was wondering if you were doing anything after this," he began with a nervous-looking smile, "'Cause if you weren't, I thought we could hang out?"

Kairi smiled at his hesitance. He was almost childlike. "It'll be too late to go to the clocktower, so sure. What did you have in mind?"

He grinned. "Awesome! I know this place you'll love."

"Okay, just let me know when you're ready to go then." Sora bounced on his feet and fidgeted with the tie he was wearing. She eyed him curiously. Sora wasn't usually so fidgety. "Is something wrong?" Kairi asked hesitantly. She dreaded to think it had something to do with what Riku had revealed earlier about Sora's intentions.

He shook his head and smiled. "No. I just wanted to say that I'm happy you've let me back in your life. I know I didn't deserve it. Thank you for not giving up on me, Kairi."

"Sora-"

He stuck out his hand to stop her and grinned. "You don't have to say anything. I just wanted you to know." He glanced around the room. Taking a step away from her, he added, "I'll come find you when it's almost over."

Kairi watched him walk away with a heavy heart. Even though he was less obvious about it, she knew he was still trying to win her heart back. There was a small part of her that wished she could give him what he wanted, because she did still care for him deeply. But she wasn't that person anymore. Instead of blindly devoting herself, she was going to trust what her heart told her. And right now, it was begging her to be cautious.

* * *

"Man! I'm sorry, Kai. I should've checked the hours before dragging you out here," Sora sighed through chattering teeth. Kairi watched as he furiously rubbed his hands together. "I p-promise I'll bring you back some other time, though."

Kairi tugged her violet hat lower to try to cover more of her ears. "What is this place? A tea shop?" she questioned as she peered through the darkened display window. She could see hints of decorative, circular tables and chairs and flowery prints on the walls. She squinted her eyes and spotted a huge, cat-looking sculpture on the counter. She had to admit, she probably would've loved the little shop.

"Yeah, they have a lot of…cute things," Sora explained absently.

She eyed him and noticed that his attention had shifted to the flurries of snow falling from the sky. He watched their descent in genuine-looking awe, as though it was his first time seeing the snowfall. Kairi couldn't contain her giggles.

"Sora, why are you-?"

He turned his head to her and grinned. "Kairi, let's dance."

She blinked. "Excuse me?"

"Come on, it'll be fun. I promise!" He extended his hand to her. She hesitated before placing her own in the textured palm of his glove.

Sora pulled her out into the deserted, pedestrian street. He took his other hand in hers and carefully began to sway as the snowflakes landed on the yarn of his black beanie.

Kairi smirked as Sora awkwardly led them across the slippery cobblestones. "You're still a terrible dancer, Sora."

He chuckled, "Rhythm isn't something that comes naturally to me." She shook her head. "Doesn't mean we can't still have fun, right?" Before she could ask what he meant, Sora extended his arms and spun faster with a laugh.

"Sora!" Kairi yelped as she struggled to keep up with his speed. She could feel her flats sloshing against the cold ground. "What are you doing?"

He laughed, "Just have fun, Kai!" Sora yanked her toward his chest, which she slammed into, and playfully spun her around with his arm. "Do you even know how anymore?"

She gasped, completely offended by his insinuation. Kairi knew how to have fun! She was  _loads_ of fun. She yanked Sora to her by the buttons of his coat and smirked. "It's you who doesn't know how to have fun, you workaholic!" she taunted with a giggle. She quickly took a step back and twirled, forcing him to twirl with her.

Forgetting everything else, she let herself be absorbed by the unpracticed, choppy dance moves they shared. Sora demonstrated his version of a duo sprinkler and she forced him into a leapfrog jump, covering the front of his coat in wet, sprinkled snow. She giggled as Sora spit out clumps of ice and snow from his mouth. Never one to be down for too long, he'd popped back up and continued swinging her around without complaint.

"Kairi," he whispered, slowing his pace to meet her eyes. She flinched. The way he'd said her name reminded her of times she'd rather not think of while prancing about in his arms. "Remember when we did this before?"

She nearly choked. "Y-Yes, I do."

It was in the backyard they hardly used. Sora had noticed the snow and had rushed outside without a jacket. Kairi, of course, followed him to make sure he didn't catch a cold. Somehow, Sora talked her into dancing until they were both trembling from their wet, cold clothing. And after they'd shared a steamy shower she didn't want to think about.

"Kairi, do you think I could come back home?"

She knew he'd ask her eventually. With a shudder, she answered, "Sora, I don't think that's a good idea."

He grasped her hands more firmly. They suddenly felt frostbitten in his grasp. "I miss home, Kai. Riku's place is great but it's not our place. I promise if you let me come back you won't regret it," he swore with a fervent nod.

Her heart was pounding in her head. Even if she said no, how long would she really be able to deny him his home? Now that he was becoming himself, what reasons did she have for keeping him away? And for how long would he even accept those reasons?

Kairi pulled her hands from his and took a step back. "I'm sorry, Sora. I need some time to think about all of this. I have to go." She turned and fled before he could say anything else.

She paused behind a corner a few blocks away to catch her breath. Leaning against the cold brick wall, she felt her heart plummet. Kairi blinked back the tears watering in her eyes. Sora was trying so hard but she couldn't reciprocate.

* * *

_I looked around and all I could see was darkness._

_The sound of my shoes clacking against the darkened floor echoed through my ears as I ran. To where, I wasn't sure, but the urgency flooded every thought. I had to get somewhere. I had to stop something terrible from happening._

_"_ _Sora!" The scream came out as a whisper. I placed my hand on my throat and grimaced. He wasn't going to be able to hear me._

_"_ _Tch. Cut the whining."_

_I froze and turned my head. Sora was next to me. I'd found him! But he was different. I frowned, unable to look away from his hauntingly, golden eyes. I tried to speak again. "Sora, wh-why?"_

_He snickered. "_ Sora! _" he whined in an imitation of my voice, "Save your lousy performance for someone who cares."_

_"_ _What do you mean?" I asked quietly. The dread I'd been feeling intensified._

_A smirk formed on his face. Slowly, he began to circle me with his hands behind his back. "Oh, you thought_ I  _cared, didn't you?" he mocked with a feigned pout, "Wake up, Kairi! I slept with Naminé and enjoyed it more than sleeping with you."_

_"_ _Stop it." My voice was hoarse._

_"_ _You stop it. You're pathetic, chasing after me like this when I clearly don't want you." He paused to laugh in a way I'd never heard before. The sound shook me to my core; it was unhinged and hateful. "That's the reason I wouldn't marry you. You're such a loser. You'll do anything just to keep me around, won't you?"_

_I couldn't respond at all. I was frozen. He cupped my chin with his gloved hand. I could clearly see he had changed so much; he had black hair and a twisted expression on his once cheerful face._

_"_ _Will you die for me, Kairi?" My eyes widened. "How about it? If your heart truly beats for only me, let's make it not beat at all."_

_"_ _Sora, please-!"_

_His hand dropped to my neck and squeezed. I clawed at his hand desperately, but he was stronger than me. He'd always been stronger than me._

_Sora laughed maniacally. Through my dimming vision, I could see the mirth in his eyes. He was enjoying this._

Kairi screamed herself awake. She ripped away the blankets that had wrapped around her and hugged her knees to her chest. The room around her was dark and empty. She hated it. It felt as though that demented version of Sora was lurking in every corner, watching her with bloodlust.

She hurried from her mattress and ran down the hall. Without bothering to knock, she burst into the guest room and cried for Axel. Instead of finding his comforting presence, she was reminded that he was gone. Kairi settled onto the floor, shaking from both fear and disappointment.

"Of course," she whispered, "He lied too." She hugged herself as the memories began flooding her mind. Axel's gaze, his smile, his laugh... Was there no one she could trust? Was she such a bad judge of character?

Through her teary eyes, she caught the glint of something shining across the carpeted floor. She wiped her face with her arms and slowly crawled toward the shining light. Horror struck her as her gaze focused on the engagement ring that was lying on the ground. She hadn't seen it since the night she kissed Axel for the first time. The nightmarish Sora with golden eyes seemed to be glaring at her through the diamonds. She panicked again.

With a yelp, she scrambled out of the room and back into her bedroom. Immediately, her bag of wedding cut-outs and planning books were in her line of sight. Kairi recalled that she'd been looking through them after she got home, trying to recapture the feelings of love and excitement she once had with no luck.

The walls seemed to creep closer around her as she stood in the darkened bedroom. Everywhere she looked was a reminder of Sora. The wedding clippings, the clothes he'd left in the closet, the shard from the broken lamp she'd kept on their shared dresser, even the empty place where his sail boat once sat. Kairi grabbed her phone from her nightstand and fled to the living room.

But there was no peace there either. All she could see was Axel lying on the couch or Sora checking his tie in the mirror. The tears from her eyes were beginning to fall in earnest again. Even though it was nearly 3 a.m., she dialed Riku's number as she paced the length of the townhome.

_"_ _Kairi?"_ came his bleary voice.

She couldn't speak without her voice breaking. "R-Riku, I can't do this. I can't!"

He seemed more alert.  _"Kairi, what's wrong?"_ She couldn't answer because she was crying.  _"Kairi, are you all right?"_

"No, I-I'm so scared-"

_"_ _I'm coming over there, Kai. Wait for me."_

She nodded even though he couldn't see it. "Hurry, Riku. I can't stay here anymore."


	36. Serendipity

Axel groaned as he walked through the gloomy streets of Twilight Town. Xion had told him Kairi was waiting for him at the clocktower weeks ago and he still hadn't bucked up the courage to show up. In fact, every time he started building his resolve, the little voice in his head talked him out of it. What if Xion was wrong and Kairi wasn't interested in listening or talking things through? Maybe she just wanted to make their separation final. And that thought alone was enough to make Axel want to disappear from the world itself. It was one thing to condemn himself to a life without Kairi, it was another thing for her to speak the words herself. Isa had done that, and he wasn't willing to go through that again.

He came to a hole in the wall around the inner part of town and paused. The opening was large enough to walk through and led into the surrounding forest that Axel was only vaguely familiar with. He shrugged and decided to enter. Anything to prolong his procrastination.

The scenery was calming. The trees around him were so tall the sky appeared to be broken into patches outlined by their branches. As he walked across the dampened ground, he reveled in how he could hear each step he took. As the wind blew through the trees around him, it seemed as though each bristle made its own sound. The place was so quiet it was almost hypnotic. Before he could sink too far into tranquility, his peace was interrupted.

Axel noticed the sound of steps sloshing toward him. He was tempted to hide behind a tree, but then mentally berated himself for the thought. What did he have to hide from? It wasn't like there was a trespassing sign he'd purposefully ignored. He continued the path he'd chosen, which conveniently brought him closer to whoever else was among the trees. As the person's body came into view, Axel sharply inhaled. Only fate would be so cruel to have him run into Sora.

Sora didn't notice him immediately. The brunette seemed preoccupied by his own thoughts as his black boots shuffled across the terrain. There was a look of disgust on his face, and as a whole, he appeared distressed. Axel never knew Sora to be one to look so helpless, but as he'd wondered many times, had he ever truly known the man?

Sora's head lifted and their eyes met. Time seemed to come to a standstill as they looked at each other. Normally, Axel was quick to make retorts or dole out insults, but he could not think of a single one. Even just greeting the guy seemed wrong. What was left to say?

Instead of forming intelligent words, Axel just muttered an, "Uhh…" and hated himself for it. As if the situation wasn't awkward enough.

Sora rubbed the back of his neck. "Yeah," he managed to choke out, "Uhh is right."

Surely, Kairi would appreciate that his first instinct wasn't to pummel Sora into the ground, right? All things considered. Axel shoved his hands in his pockets, also hating that he felt shame as he looked upon the tanned brunette.  _Serves me right, I guess._

Neither man budged. Axel was certain Sora wanted to flee the scene as much as he did but they both appeared to be stuck to the earth. It looked like there was no escaping a conversation. Oh boy.

"Should I ask what you're doing out here?" Axel questioned uncomfortably.

Sora looked away and chuckled, "I'm just…walking."

"Same."

Silence.

It was hard to believe it could be so silent with Sora standing there. The upbeat brunette he remembered never knew how to shut up. It was jarring to see him looking so meek and awkward. Sora had come out of their last struggle victorious, so why was he acting like he was the one who'd looked stupid?

Axel felt forced to continue speaking, "Should I ask-"

"Kairi's okay," Sora blurted out. His face seemed to redden as he spoke. "She's doing okay…"

Axel was relieved to hear that, but he didn't want Sora to know how he felt; he kept his face as straight as he could. "Good to hear." There was a question weighing on his mind, and the thought was already making him frown. "You see her often?"

Sora nodded. "I do."

He faltered. Sora was seeing her often? Did that mean he'd moved back in? Were they together? Just as the thoughts were threatening to consume him, he shook his head and let out a sigh. It was Kairi's decision who she spoke to and what she did with her time. Axel had no right to inquire about her affairs, especially since they weren't even speaking.

"That's great," he forced out with a grimace. His voice sounded unnatural.

Sora seemed to notice. The man was now fidgeting with his gloves. "Yeah, I'm grateful to her," he muttered as though he didn't want Axel to hear what he said.

Axel let out a long sigh. He knew what he had to say, despite the pain he was sure it would bring. "Look, Sora," he began, "I'm sorry. Things shouldn't have ended that way between us. A day hasn't passed that I haven't regretted my actions."

Sora's eyes widened, almost suspiciously. "You're sorry?"

He forced himself to nod. "I am. I acted like an ass." Axel had never felt squirmier. There was only one other time he'd been so humbled by another man, and that humiliation was enough for a life time. Axel was beyond hate; he loathed this situation. But deep down, he knew it was what Kairi would want and that was motivation enough. If he ever wanted a chance at being back in her life, even as a mere acquaintance, this is what he had to do. Sora was a part of her as much as his own hand was a part of his body.

Sora's face seemed to brighten, though, not by much. "Axel, I was an ass too. I shouldn't have said that stuff about you," he confessed with the weakest of smiles, "I've been a lousy friend."

Axel smirked. Leave it to Sora to equate everything to friendship. "You don't have to go that far," he mused as he stared up into the sky, "We've always been an odd pair, haven't we?"

"Yeah, you're right about that."

Axel chuckled despite himself. His guard dropped as he slipped into his memories. "When we first met, I was trying to set a fire in the waste basket on your floor. And you just grinned and talked me out of it."

Sora chuckled along, "I knew you weren't a bad guy. You were just in a hard place. I didn't expect you to come back the next day and beg for work, though."

Axel shook his head. That moment had been  _agonizingly_  out of his character. "Man, I never expected to be so desperate," he lamented, "I was such a schmuck. Something just seemed different about you, I guess."

"Maybe." Sora stepped closer and Axel was surprised he wanted to be within his 'punching' range. "I was truly sorry I could never hire you, but given how things turned out, I think it was for the best." Axel could only nod, even if Sora had intended the comment to be a bit of a jab at him. If Sora had hired him, he would've never had the opportunity to get close to Kairi. And as sappy as it sounded, he wouldn't trade the time they shared together for anything. Not even a chance to get off the blacklist. Sora hesitated then stepped aside, "I've gotta go. Take care, Axel."

Axel watched his retreating form until it disappeared on the other side of the hole in the wall. If someone had told him he was capable of having a civil conversation with Sora, he would've never believed it until now. A small smile found his lips as he continued his walk among the trees. If he was capable of apologizing to Sora, surely, he could face Kairi again.

Ahead of him, the forest seemed to lead to some sort of clearing. He dared to step past the tree line and found himself standing in front of a brick wall with tall, iron gates that had been pushed open slightly. Behind the wall was a large mansion that appeared to be abandoned. Axel raised a brow and dared to step closer. There was a window open on the top left of the building. A pristine, white curtain was blowing in the wind.

Axel gazed through the iron bars and saw that the front lawn was in disrepair. There were broken sculptures and chunks of rock everywhere. He wasn't sure what it was but something about the scene made his hair stand on end. Sora had been walking away from this place, hadn't he?

"What on earth were you doing in a place like this?" Axel muttered under his breath. He was tempted to walk into the mansion and solve the mystery. He knew it'd been strange to encounter someone else on his walk, especially Sora of all people. What had he been doing before they ran into each other? What could possibly be so interesting here?

Axel paused. He was doing it again. He stepped away from the gates and turned back to the forest. There was no point in involving himself where he wasn't needed. Meddling was what got him in trouble in the first place, and he wasn't about to make the same mistake.

Still, he couldn't shake the foreboding feeling he had as he returned to the main part of town. Something wasn't right.

* * *

Axel marched toward the clocktower with renewed determination. If Kairi was up there, he was going to face her and give her all the answers she deserved. He'd stopped on the way to grab some coffee, mostly to have something to warm for his hands, but then thought Kairi might like a cup of tea so he bought one for her as well. Xion had made it seem like Kairi would wait up there for hours each day, freezing.

As he walked up the icy cobblestones, he caught sight of something both alarming and humorous. Someone had loaded themselves with cardboard boxes so high they couldn't see where they were going as they tried to walk down the steepest slope in town. The person was skidding slowly across the slippery ground and toward a lamppost. As Axel watched, it became clearer to him they had no idea of the upcoming collision.

As much as it pained him to internally admit, he was going to blame himself if something happened to that careless person. Kairi was going to have to wait a bit longer. Axel glanced around and spotted some guy, and who he presumed was his girlfriend, walking toward him. He hurried over to them and shoved the drinks in their hands. "It's coffee and tea. Got it memorized?" Indicating which was which with his index finger.

Axel didn't bother to explain himself or listen to their thanks. The person with the boxes was beginning to tilt forward at a dangerous angle. He raced across the pavement and managed to catch the topmost package before it fell to the ground. The second also tumbled into his arms as he stopped the stranger from sliding out of control with the force of his body.

"Hey now, hasn't anyone told you not to stack things over your head?" he asked as he properly stacked the boxes in his arms, "Someone could get hurt."

"I was trying to- _Axel_!"

The yelp startled him. He looked past the load in his arms and was surprised to see Kairi gaping at him. Her hair was tied into a braid that seemed stuck onto the fabric of her coat and her eyes matched the color of the warm hat on her head. His breath seemed to escape him as well as any intelligible phrase he could say to her. Kairi, in the flesh, was more stunning than any memory he could conjure.

"Hey…" he nearly whispered, "I didn't know you were-"

"Thank you!"

Axel nearly staggered backward. She was thanking him? Not snatching her things from him and telling him off? His shoulders dropped a bit. "You're welcome," he found himself replying. He glanced around the sidewalk, people were going about their day as though nothing strange was happening right next to them. Well, perhaps it wasn't that strange. They were just two people talking. Axel wished the moment felt as ordinary as it looked.

"Do you want me to carry these for you?" he offered with a nervous chuckle.

Kairi nodded, strangely calm about the chance meeting. "Would you, please? They're light but you're right…I should've left room to see. I was too eager to finish," she explained as she shifted the weight of what remained in her arms, "You can follow me. It's just in this doorway."

Axel followed her into an open door that was at the bottom of the incline. The entranceway was dark and only contained a black staircase. Kairi led him to the third landing and shoved a key into the lone door. Hesitantly, he walked inside and saw there were more boxes in what looked to be an empty apartment. His breath hitched as the realization struck him; she'd moved out of the townhome.

"You can set them there," she instructed as she placed hers on the kitchen counter. He did as she said, unable to take his eyes off her. Kairi seemed oblivious to his attention as she ripped off her hat and wiped the sweat from her hairline. He wondered how long she'd been moving.

She finally caught his gaze and froze where she was standing. Axel blanched; she was probably waiting for him to leave. "Well, I'll get out of the way then-"

"Axel, wait!" came her pleading voice. She rushed over to him and grabbed his arm before he could even turn away. The feeling of her gloved hand on his sleeve made him flinch and it didn't go unnoticed. She immediately released him and took a step back. "Sorry, I shouldn't have…" Her eyes were searching his. For what, he had no idea.

"No worries," he sputtered out. He glanced around the apartment, trying to find something else to look at besides the woman making him sound like an idiot. Axel had rehearsed so many speeches for when he saw her again but they all failed him now. There was nothing he could say to make up for what happened. There was nothing he could promise her that would make it better.

The silence that hung over them was thicker than the one he'd shared with Sora. It permeated the air with tension and uncertainty. Axel was sure if he remained next to her much longer it would strangle him.

"Axel, I've been looking for you," she finally confessed, "I wanted to talk to you about what happened."

"I know," Axel hesitated with a rub of his neck, "Xion told me you were waiting for me on the clocktower."

"Then why didn't you-?" She frowned and shook her head. "No, it's okay. You don't have to explain yourself if you don't want to."

She was giving him an out. All he had to do was take it and walk out of the door. He studied her face. Her pink lips were trembling as though she wanted to say so much more. He let out his second, deep sigh of the day and cracked a smile. "No, Kairi. I want to explain myself," he admitted, "It just took me a while to be ready. But before we jump into that, do you have more things you're moving in here?"

Kairi seemed to falter; Axel's breath hitched. He began prepping his row of apologies only to have them fall apart when she smiled. It was a real smile and his heart hummed in his chest from the sight of it. He never thought she'd smile at him like that again. "Okay, you can help me. There's a few more things in my car. I can show you where I parked."

Axel followed her back onto the street as though he was floating through a dream. Was he really in the same place as Kairi again? And was it really okay? She led him to her car she'd parked on the side of the street a few blocks away. The boxes that remained were much smaller than what she'd been carrying earlier so Axel was able to grab them all for her.

"Are you sure?" Kairi asked as they made their way back to the building, "I can take something from you."

He shook his head. "Nah, I'm happy to do this, prin-" He nearly coughed on the word. "I mean, Kairi. Sorry about that."

"It's okay…" There was a strain in her voice. Axel inwardly groaned. He'd gotten comfortable too quickly again. When was he going to learn? He stepped aside to let her into the building first then walked up the staircase, cursing himself the entire way.


	37. A Little Grace

Kairi closed the door behind Axel and watched as he set the boxes next to the pile in the middle of the floor. She still couldn't believe she'd run into him like she had. It must have been fate for her to finally find him the day she'd moved out of the townhome. And now that she'd found him, maybe they could…no, it was better not to get her hopes up for anything.

"Sorry," she announced once she'd locked the door, "I'd offer you something to drink but all of my things are packed away still." She suddenly felt flustered. "I don't have anywhere to sit either…I'm sorry. I didn't think this through."

Axel shook his head. "Nah, don't worry about it."

Kairi floundered. Where should she even start? There was so much she wanted to tell him, so many lines she'd practiced while waiting for him on the clocktower. How could she jump into it all without feeling like she was dragging up the past or blaming him in some way? Axel already seemed skittish enough; she didn't want to chase him away.

"Axel, I'm sorry-"

"Kairi, I'm sorry-"

She gasped, feeling as shocked as Axel looked. He ran his fingers through his hair and gestured toward her. "Ladies first, didn't mean to interrupt."

Kairi felt her cheeks warm. There was no reason for her to feel so embarrassed in front of Axel. After everything they'd been through and said to each other, embarrassment was the last thing she should feel while looking at him. Yet, it felt as though his green eyes were examining her under a microscope.

"Axel, I'm sorry I didn't listen to you when you tried to explain yourself that day," Kairi continued, dropping her gaze to the empty floor underneath her feet, "And I'm sorry that I hit you. You didn't deserve that." Just saying the words made her feel like someone had punched her chest. But she did her best to shake it off, feeling guilty and shameful wasn't going to help anyone.

"No, I'm sorry, Kairi. I should have never hid the truth from you in the first place. You were right to call me childish. I didn't listen to you either and what I did to you was inexcusable," he confessed. Kairi dared to look at him and was overwhelmed by the sincerity written on his face. It was so different from the anger that had been there that night.

"It was inexcusable. I still can't believe you of all people would betray my trust like that." Kairi stepped closer to him so she could see his expression clearly as she continued. "You were my rock, Axel. It broke my heart to discover you hadn't been honest with me after everything that happened between Sora and myself. Frankly, it was a nightmare."

Axel shifted uncomfortably. His face becoming more pained with every word she spoke. She could sympathize, but she also had to say what she needed to say. "Kai-"

She placed her finger to her lips. "Wait," she ordered gently. Axel silenced immediately. "But I forgive you. At the time, I couldn't think there was a reason other than maliciousness for your behavior, but I've had a lot of space to think and I'm willing to listen to what you have to say about what happened."

"That's more than I deserve," was Axel's uncharacteristically humble reply. She watched as he unzipped his coat and laid it on the top the pile. She decided to do the same. Truthfully, she had already begun to sweat. Kairi was more jittery than she wanted to let on to. Her entire body seemed to be charged with anxiety she couldn't quell.

"Everything I did, I thought I was doing for you," Axel asserted with a torn expression, "But I realize now, it was more about me proving myself to you. I visited Sora and confronted him at his work because I wanted to be responsible for your happiness. After I found you unconscious that day, I swore it'd never happen again. So, I fought Sora the moment he walked through the door. I didn't mean to sound like I was speaking for you about your engagement, I simply thought Sora shouldn't be so smug about your feelings. The way he spoke made it sound like he was belittling everything he put you through. I didn't want to tell you what happened. You were so hurt, I couldn't stand to see you that way, and I thought that would only make it worse."

Kairi reflected on his words, as he paused. She could understand where he might have formed that opinion, she'd thought the same thing herself in her encounters with Sora. He had seemed presumptuous and almost overconfident that she would ultimately return to him.

"As for the bracelet, I took it off you while you were sleeping. I thought if you woke up and saw it, it'd just make you feel worse, but rather than return it I kept it because…well, I knew I'd messed up everything and I didn't want to lose you. But what I was avoiding happened anyway."

Kairi let his words sink in. He sounded apologetic and she appreciated that he could see where he went wrong. She supposed he had been thinking about this as often as she did, but was thinking about it enough? She spoke her next words carefully, "It's just that to me, it seems like you were trying to decide what's best for me,  _for_  me. You treated me like I was incapable of deciding what I needed for myself. On top of that, you acted like you had to trick me into loving you by taking Sora out of the picture."

"That's not what I wanted. It wasn't about taking Sora out of the picture or deciding things for you…I was an idiot, to put it simply," he muttered with a sigh. Kairi couldn't disagree with him, but she also felt for him. If she'd been in his shoes, watching someone dear to her suffer, would she have been able to navigate through all the feelings expertly? She wasn't so sure.

"This doesn't leave the room, okay?" Kairi raised a brow. He leaned toward her and covered his mouth with his hand. "I was a jealous, selfish fuck," he whispered with a smirk. Kairi covered her mouth with her hand but the giggles came out all the same. His smirk seemed to grow as he backed away from her and placed his hands on his hips. "I'm being serious, Kairi. I'm baring my soul to you and you're laughing at me."

She giggled one last time and composed herself. "Sorry, I thought you were trying to make me laugh."

His eyes widened. "Kairi, I'm surprised at you. It's like you can't take me seriously or something."

She rolled her eyes. "Whatever, Axel. Just go on."

He chuckled, "I appreciate your attention. All joking aside, I genuinely regret acting like such a jealous asshole. I'm sorry about the party your folks had too. Well actually, I'm sorry about all my behavior on your island. I could tell you everything I've been grieved about, but it all boils down to this, I let you down."

Kairi smiled. In all her mental rehearsals of their heart to heart, she didn't imagine this conversation would go so smoothly. "Thank you for apologizing, Axel. It means more to me than I can say."

"And for the record, I think you're more than capable of caring for yourself and making sound choices," Axel declared with a small smile, "I just wanted to pick up some of the pieces so you didn't have to do it all alone, but you're right, I got carried away."

She was touched. As misguided as he had been, Axel's intentions had been pure. The deception wasn't to control her, it was to help her the only way he knew how. Judging from his tumultuous past, Kairi could understand how he'd come to think what he did was what was best. If she tallied all the good and bad things he'd done for and to her, it was obvious which side he fell toward. But even though she forgave him, Kairi couldn't just pick up where they'd left off.

Axel hesitated, "Are we gonna be okay?"

"Do you want us to be?" she inquired, not missing a beat.

Axel seemed taken aback by her question. "Of course, I do. Why wouldn't I?"

Kairi didn't realize she was holding her breath until she released it. "I was awful to you. We were awful to each other. Why would you want to go back to that?" she asked, "From day one, we've argued and judged each other. There's been so many misunderstandings."

She hated the words as soon as they came out of her mouth. To demote her friendship with Axel to a series of terrible behavior and arguments felt cheap and cruel. She watched as he visibly stiffened before her. Would they argue now? Would he disagree? Kairi couldn't decide what would be worse, if Axel agreed or disagreed with her statement.

"Kairi, that's the first wrong thing you've said," Axel replied more calmly than expected. He placed his hand on her shoulder and captured her timid gaze in one swoop. "You're one of the best things that's ever happened to me. I'm lucky you're even talking to me right now. I know I can't change the past, but I want you to know if you are willing to let me back in your life, as whatever you need me to be, I will not make the same mistakes."

Her heart was pounding in her ears. It was hard for her to reconcile the man before her to the man who had lunged at Sora. What had broken her heart was losing the supportive, caring man she thought she knew. The lie she could have weathered. Having her concept of the world fall apart, however, was what cut the deepest. Even now, she wasn't sure what to trust.

"As whatever I need you to be?" Kairi echoed with disbelief

Axel nodded. "Consider it done. Chauffer, professional mover, someone to vent to, the guy that brings you coffee, whatever you need. I'm there."

Kairi could feel raw emotion flooding through her chest and into her throat. She promised herself she wasn't going to look weak in front of him, but it was becoming increasingly difficult to not be carried on the waves of her feelings.

"Be my friend?" she requested, forcing back the shakiness that was creeping into her voice.

"Always, Kairi."

Rather than crumple into a heap of tears like she seemed to these days. Kairi decided to drag out the snarkiness she hadn't used in what felt like years. "When did you become such a sap?" Kairi teased with a small smile.

Axel crossed his arms, a familiar smile tugging at the corners his lips as well. "Well, that's not very friendly."

Kairi shrugged and poked him in the chest. "You said you'd be whatever I needed. Maybe I need someone to tease."

She watched as he feigned displeasure with an upturn of his nose. "Ha. I see how it is. Need anything else?" he questioned, taking a moment to look around, "…Like help unpacking all this?"

Her belongings had been such a pain to pack up. She'd been hoping to rope Riku into helping her after they went furniture shopping, but since Axel was already there… "Actually, yes. That would be extremely helpful," she admitted, "Do you mind?"

"Just show me what you want me to do," Axel replied, dumping his jacket on the floor so he could begin opening boxes. "Now is probably as good a time as any to ask what's going on, I'd guess?"

Kairi hesitated. Now that she and Axel had talked and things between them were fair, she wasn't sure she wanted to dive into a conversation about the terrible nightmares she'd had. For one, she wasn't sure how he would react to her dreaming about Sora in such a way or his recent attempts to win her affection. They hadn't even discussed him generally yet. Jumping into a conversation about his romantic intentions seemed like a recipe for disaster.

Secondly, she didn't want to let on to the depth of her feelings concerning him or how they'd chased her out of the townhome. She and Axel had developed a slow-burning affection that still flickered inside her no matter how she tried to talk herself out of it. How could she tell him how she'd woken up crying for him without delving into deeper, vulnerable feelings? Her heart was screaming at her to be careful.

"I decided to move out," she finally replied. She pulled her keys from her pocket and began cutting the tape of the box closest to her. It was one of the smaller ones.

"No kidding," Axel breathed as he ripped off the tape from the larger box next to him, "Care to elaborate?"

"I needed a fresh start," was her vague response. Axel didn't say anything else as he pulled the flaps of the box open. Kairi was grateful he wasn't pushing her for more information.

The silence between them was strangely comfortable. Kairi could hardly believe she felt so at ease next to Axel again. The problem was Kairi wasn't sure what to expect from him now, and she suspected he was having similar thoughts. After all, he hadn't bothered to use a nickname with her since he'd accidentally called her princess. She didn't want him to feel like he had to walk on eggshells around her, but she also didn't want to get too chummy. She frowned; she hoped she wasn't sending mixed signals by teasing him and then putting up her walls.

"Kairi, you okay over there?"

She jolted. Axel was staring at her with an expression she thought she'd never see on his face again. The gentleness in his eyes lit a small fire in her stomach. "Oh, yes. Sorry," she quickly answered with a flush, "I was just thinking about how I was going to decorate."

He shook his head. "You know, I can still tell when you're lying." She gulped. "But if you wanted to tell me, you would. I can respect your boundaries. You could say I've learned my lesson about meddling." He chuckled under his breath as he began pulling tape off another box. "You don't have to feel guilty or anything."

Kairi softened. "Axel, thank you."

"Don't mention it." She opened her mouth to say more but he stopped her with a look. "Seriously, don't. Remember that pesky reputation I have."

At this, she snorted. "Axel, do you even talk to anyone besides Xion and Roxas?"

He balled up the tape in his hand and threw it at her. Unfortunately, it just fell to the floor in front of him. His feeble attempt made her laugh more. "Laugh it up, Kairi," he sneered, "I thought we were past the 'Axel doesn't have any friends' phase."

Kairi grinned. "We have to start over, remember?"

Before Axel could say whatever retort was on his lips, someone knocked on the door. Kairi quickly excused herself. She unlocked the latch and yanked the door open, happy to see that Riku was on the other side. This time he was carrying a small, glass vase that held a single lollypop lily.

"Hi!" she greeted cheerily, "Thank you so much for the house warming present." She gave Riku a quick hug and stepped aside to let him in.

"You're in a good mood today, Kai- _oh_ , I see why," Riku pointed out with a knowing smirk, "Long time no see, Axel."

Kairi blushed despite herself. "Riku, really?" she grumbled as she took her present to the kitchen. She could hear Riku chuckling after her. This had to be payback for all the times she'd brought up his father's drunken confession at the Christmas party.

"It's about time someone take her down a notch. She's been roasting me since I got here," Axel commented with a sly grin, "By all means, keep going."

Kairi watched as the smirk on Riku's face grew. He seemed to be greatly amused by Axel's presence; it'd been a while since she'd seen such a big smile on his face. "I'd be delighted to make fun of her some more after we have a chat in the hall," he replied coolly, "Shall we?"

Axel's face drained of all its color. Kairi bit down on her lip, trying to fight the knee-jerk defensiveness she felt for the fiery man. "Riku…"

He simply winked at her and stepped outside with the redhead. Kairi shook her head with a knowing smile. She would let Riku do and say whatever he needed to and not listen through the door. She could take a lesson from Axel, and learn not to stick her nose where it wasn't needed.


	38. Mercy

Seeing Riku again was something Axel had been hoping to avoid for at least a few more days. But as fate would have it, he had to face the entire Destiny Islands trio within the span of a few hours. Simply marvelous. Axel couldn't believe his luck, literally.

He was standing in a cold, dark hallway with a man who could beat him to a pulp if he tried hard enough. Riku's muscles were apparent even through his dark gray, winter coat and navy scarf, or maybe Axel was just hyper-aware. The intensity of his aquamarine eyes was more unnerving than Axel cared to admit, and he hoped that the level of intimidation he felt wasn't obvious. So much for not getting on Riku's bad side.

"So..." Axel found himself muttering, "How have you been?"

"I'll cut to the chase."

Axel ran his fingers through his hair, feeling like Riku had just stabbed a needle into his foot. "Well, go right ahead then."

"I told you to take care of her. Please explain to me how any of what happened was doing that?" Riku questioned gruffly. Axel opened his mouth to begin his explanation, but Riku kept talking. "Not only did you break her heart and lie to her, but you didn't even come back after. She's been looking for you this entire time, stuck between feelings of guilt and betrayal, and terrified of her own judgement."

Axel was at a loss for words. He'd never bothered to think about what turmoil Kairi must've been in while he was off the grid. It'd been easier to think she was better off without him. "I've been selfish," he admitted, "I get it."

He couldn't tell if Riku was surprised by his admission or if he was still glaring at him. The guy really needed a haircut. "Do you?" Riku asked, "Because if you do, you'll make certain that doesn't happen again." Riku was starting to sound like a protective father. Axel was slightly miffed by his tone, but he couldn't really be angry. He deserved it.

"I'm not asking you to never hurt her again," Riku added with an almost softening sigh, "Hurt is a part of all relationships, I understand that. But I  _am_  asking you to be more considerate. If you're going to be a part of her life, just remember how big and pure her heart is and don't walk all over it. If you fight, fix it."

"All right," Axel relented, "I get the message." Riku stiffened. Axel's hands shot up in surrender. "No, seriously, I do. I'm not being sarcastic."

"That's a first," Riku scoffed.

Axel slouched against the wall and folded his arms across his chest. "You're right. Is that what you wanted to hear? Look, I know I was a piece of work and I know why."

Riku's eyes seemed to bore deeper into his face. Was nothing he said satisfactory? "Go on," he urged without any emotional expression. Axel couldn't tell if Riku wanted to pound his face in or give him a pass.

"Kairi may be the first woman I ever loved, but she's not the first person I ever felt so connected to. And unfortunately, the first time is what sets the precedent for all the other times. I've mentioned Isa to her before, but I didn't mention what lengths I went to try and stop the inevitable."

"Who's Isa?"

It'd been years since the day, but the pain still flowed through him. And it seemed, despite his best efforts, controlled his actions. "He was my best friend growing up. After my parents died, he was all I had in the world. I would've done anything for him; spying, stealing, murder, you name it." Axel glanced at Riku's hardening visage. "Which, I  _didn't_ for the record. I was just trying to paint a picture," Axel quickly added, "Sheesh, maybe in an alternate universe."

"Better be such a far-fetched one that there's a replica of me running around, fighting people," Riku muttered, attempting to blow the long bangs out of his face.

"Anyway, Isa betrayed me. He framed me, got me blacklisted, and stole my research. But even that wasn't enough to get me to leave him alone. For months, I stuck around Radiant Garden, trying to talk to him. I thought if I could just get him alone I could knock some sense into him and all could be forgiven," Axel admitted, "But I was wrong. You know what he told me? I'd ceased being useful to him."

Axel felt his body stiffen as the image of Isa's icy eyes and vibrant, blue hair came into his mind. The image of his back turned, walking away, would forever be burned onto his retinas.

" _Your_ talents  _were never suited for this line of work. I'm surprised you deluded yourself for so long for the sake of friendship."_

_A flash of cold, golden eyes and a stern expression. The casual toss of his blue hair, as though, he could care less what his words were doing to his oldest friend._

" _Do I mean that much to you? Pathetic."_

_He turned, the edge of his white coat flying up as he did. His steps echoed, bouncing off the bronze, metal walls and pipes that surrounded them._

" _I cannot believe I tolerated you all these years. Goodbye, Lea."_

Axel took in a breath to calm himself, clenching his fist so his hand would stop shaking. "All those years together amounted to those words...I was never anything more than a pawn. That betrayal has haunted me since that day. It's hung over all my relationships, including the one I had with Kairi. I thought I could prevent that happening again if I made myself indispensable."

Riku was frowning, almost as if his sad tale had touched him. Instead of expressing any trace of sympathy, Riku asked, "You realize you were wrong now?"

"Yeah," Axel grumbled, "I won't make that mistake again."

"That's all I needed to hear."

"Aren't you warm and fuzzy today," Axel retorted, "We done here?"

The smile that formed on Riku's lips caught him off guard. "Not quite." Axel raised a brow. What more could Riku want from him. "Consider this a warning. Sora is back in Kairi's life too and he's ended things with Naminé. I'm sure I don't have to spell out what that means for you."

As if his mood couldn't drop any lower after reliving his memories of Isa. Not that he expected to have another chance with Kairi, he truly was grateful she would even look at him. However, that didn't mean he wanted to watch Sora attempt to put the moves on her either. The scene at the Christmas party was enough for a lifetime.

"Why are you telling me this?" Axel deadpanned.

Riku stepped closer to him. He flinched but soon realized Riku wasn't trying to hurt him. "Axel, I don't think you're a bad guy, but I don't want you to make the same mistakes with her. Try not to go ballistic if you see something you don't like." He seemed to hesitate before adding, "I can't claim to know how you feel, but I have gone through a similar thing with Sora. I can understand your fear of not being enough, I've felt it myself. But I can tell you, Kairi isn't like that. She's a light-"

"-In the darkness," Axel finished. He paused, feeling less angry with Riku by the second. "Thanks." Riku moved to open the door, but Axel stopped him with his arm. "Actually, you don't have to answer this. I just want to know. Does she want to be with him?"

Riku smirked. "Rather than answer that, I'll let you decide for yourself how she feels. You're bound to see them together soon enough." Axel hated how humorous Riku obviously found his question. The glee in his eyes was short lived, and quickly replaced by a subtle hostility. "That said, I also want to say this. I suggest you avoid putting hands on Sora in the future. I may not be so forgiving if it happens again."

Axel sucked in his breath. It was scary how Riku could go from friendly and understanding to fierce and deadly at the drop of a hat. But he supposed Sora and Kairi were his Roxas and Xion. Axel wouldn't be able to hold back if someone threatened either of them, no matter who it was.

"Right, I appreciate the pass you're giving," Axel replied, "And the information too."

Riku shrugged. "The only favorite I'm playing is Kairi. Whatever she wants, I'll support her, no matter what."

He wasn't going to say so, but Axel respected that. No reason for him to let on how he enjoyed Riku's company or how he was beginning to feel an almost brotherly affection for him. No way. So all he said was an 'okay' and followed him back inside.

Kairi was stooped over her pile of belongings when they entered. Axel was surprised to see all the boxes open. She'd been industrious during their little conversation. She straightened her back and smiled at them. His heart fluttered at the sight. How could he have been such an idiot? Riku was right to call him out on his bullshit.

"I've had a wonderful idea," she announced with a look that made Axel waver slightly, "I'll have a house-warming and invite everyone over." Her eyes drifted to his. "We have a lot to celebrate, after all."

As flattered as Axel was by her implication, the announcement shot a cold blow to his gut. Did Kairi mean to invite  _everyone_  over? Did she mean…? He supposed his first test was coming sooner than he thought.


	39. Playing it Cool

It took Kairi a week to finish furnishing her apartment. Riku graciously spent hours with her shopping for furniture for her living room, bedroom, and kitchenette. Riku's unanticipated flair and taste for interior design went a long way. Though, Kairi felt foolish for not realizing his talents earlier; Riku's apartment looked like it was straight from a catalogue.

Initially, Kairi didn't want to spend too much munny, but the excitement of building her own space eventually bested her. Kairi couldn't help but splurge on cute items she knew Sora would have scrunched his nose at. She gazed amusedly at her surroundings certain that Sora would've also scrunched his nose if he was with her now.

Kairi was currently seated at a round, pastel-colored table in the tea shop he had tried to bring her to. There were a few other patrons besides herself, but she'd sat away from them and next to the window. It was colder there, but she preferred to be able to see what was happening outside. She took in a deep breath - the entire shop smelled like sugar cookies - and checked the time with the cat-styled wall clock near her.

It was almost time for her to go home and prep for her house-warming party. It would be the first time all her beloved friends were in the same room together and she was bursting with excitement. She wasn't even worried about how Sora and Axel would interact, because Sora had already told her what happened on his walk around town. Her heart still fluttered whenever she thought about how Axel had apologized. And the fact that he'd done so before meeting her again was not lost on her. The gesture had been a sign of good faith, and it gave her hope that it was possible for her favorite guys to co-exist.

She finished what was left of her honey chamomile tea and prepared to leave. As she stood, her eyes were drawn to outside the window; an ethereal-looking woman was standing on the other side of the pedestrian street. She was close to Kairi's height and bundled up in a fuzzy, white coat. Her hands were tucked into the pockets and she was just standing there. It almost felt like the woman was watching her.

Kairi blanched. Somehow, the blinding white of the woman's coat had reminded her of the cream cheese frosted dessert she'd ordered from a bakery in town. She hurried to return the floral mug her tea had been in and rushed out of the shop. The woman was nowhere to be found when she exited.

Thankfully, the cake shoppe was still open when she arrived. It was one of those bakeries that opened and closed early. Kairi let out a sigh of relief as she stepped out of the wooden door with the small pastry box in her hands. Looking up from the red ribbon that secured her cake, she was surprised to see the same woman across the plaza from her.

This time Kairi's eyes met the woman's blue ones. The hood on the woman's jacket was covering her head, but Kairi could still see her blonde tresses cascading past her shoulders and over her chest. Her face was pleasant-looking, even from the distance; round eyes, button nose, pink lips. The only color on the woman's face came from her reddened cheeks and nose. Before Kairi could do anything but just gap at her, the woman turned and began walking away. Her easy gait made her look like an angel floating across the pavement.

Kairi helplessly watched her depart, feeling as though she should say something. She wracked her brain, wondering if there was some way she could have known her. The woman seemed to know who Kairi was. Why else would they have shared such an intense gaze?

"Maybe I should follow her," Kairi wondered aloud. The woman was a good distance away now, and she seemed to be heading out of the shopping district. Kairi hesitated. Would it be strange if she followed her?

"Kairi!"

She startled, nearly dropping the cake in her hands. Her head jerked toward the sound, almost indignantly, to see Axel waving at her with a package of his own under his arm. "Axel?" she faltered, "What are you doing out here?"

"I was on my way to your place, actually," he explained, "Check your phone."

Kairi yanked her phone from her pocket and was surprised to see she had a text from Axel. "Oh, sorry. I'm on my way back there now," she replied hastily.

"I'll be your escort then," Axel offered, extending his arm to take the cake off her hands. Kairi gladly accepted the help. She glanced back toward where the mysterious woman had walked, only to find that she was gone. Kairi frowned. "Hey, somethin' wrong?"

"Huh? Oh, no…Let's go!" she exclaimed with forced cheeriness. If Axel suspected something was off, he chose not to say anything.

Kairi was grateful for his change of heart. She wasn't sure how she could explain wanting to chase after some beautiful woman she'd probably never met before. The multiple chance meetings just seemed too bizarre. It felt as though the woman had been goading her, trying to get Kairi to follow her. But there was no point in her dwelling on it, she had a party to prepare for.

* * *

"So, what's in the box?" Kairi asked as she hung her coat in the closet next to her front door. She took Axel's from him after he'd unzipped.

"It's a housewarming gift," Axel replied as he sat it on her kitchen counter, "You can open it whenever."

Not needing to be told twice, she hurried over to him and did just that. She raised a brow after unlatching the lid and popping the box open. "You got me a plant?" she questioned. That was the last thing she expected to receive from him. Axel didn't exactly have a green thumb.

He smirked at her, clearly amused. "Not just any plant, Kairi. A  _cactus_."

She eyed him steadily. "Why'd you give me a cactus?"

"Plants are customary house warming presents," Axel fired back with an expression that made her heart skip a beat. Something warm was forming in the pit of her stomach again. Kairi wished she could shake the feelings that surged every time he looked at her like  _that_ , but she had no control.

Rather than reply with something snide, all she could utter was an, "Okay then."

Axel wasn't thrown off by her lack of sass. He replied with unbridled sarcasm, "Most people say thank you after receiving a gift."

Kairi was trying to fight the butterflies that were soaring through her sensitive organs. As she admired the playful expression on Axel's face, she felt she was being sucked into the passionate feelings she once had for him. She cleared her throat and quickly turned away to busy herself with the groceries she'd bought for the party. "Thank you, Axel."

Kairi set out the ingredients for all the finger foods she was going to prepare; pigs in a blanket, chips and homemade spinach artichoke dip, and miniature pizzas. She also pulled out two bottles of ginger ale for the sangria she'd previously prepped.

"Need any help?" Axel offered. She could feel his body directly behind hers in the tiny kitchen. The urge to lean against him struck her, but she swatted at the desire. She couldn't do that.

Her face felt warm as she nodded. "Would you mind helping me cook?"

"Sous chef at your service. Tell me what you need, shortstack."

Kairi nearly dropped the package of fresh spinach in her hands. She whirled around and asked, "What did you just call me?" Axel was laughing hysterically. She almost wanted to laugh with him. Almost. Instead, she poked him with a firm finger. "My name isn't shortstack!"

Axel feigned wiping tears from his eyes. "I know it isn't, Kairi," he managed to reply between laughs, "I was just thinking, fresh start means a fresh nickname. We're friends, after all."

She couldn't stay irritated with him after he said that. Kairi's face softened as she shook her head. "You're too much," she groaned. Kairi thrust two cans of pizza dough into his hand. "Make tiny pizzas," she ordered with the sternest face she could form. It was hard to be serious with Axel still chuckling at his own genius.

"Aye, aye, Chef Shortstack." He completed the taunt with his two finger salute.

Kairi's eyes narrowed. "Don't make me smack you with a spatula."

He was still laughing off his joke as he walked to her dining table to work. She was grateful for the breathing room his absence provided; there really wasn't enough space for two people in the kitchen. She glanced at the cactus Axel had brought her. It had a small, red flower sticking up from the top. Axel had placed it next to the lily Riku had brought her. They looked like they were made to be next to each other. She couldn't help but smile.

She was glad he was back in her life.

* * *

"You've got a great place!" Xion complimented with another sip of the sangria in her glass. Kairi eyed the punch bowl anxiously. She wished she'd made more; how could she have overlooked Xion's ability to drink down whatever was in front of her? She wouldn't have minded it much if everyone had already arrived. Unfortunately, Sora was still nowhere to be found.

"Thanks," Kairi replied, popping another dipped chip in her mouth, "I was really lucky to get this place on such short notice." She was seated on the couch with Xion and Olette. Hayner was next to Olette, resting on her the arm of her couch. Pence, Roxas, and Riku had made use of her dining chairs and lined them around the coffee table she'd set all the food and drinks on. Axel had chosen to recline on the floor with one leg rested on the other.

"Yeah, it's nice and big," Olette commented as she stared around Kairi's open space. The living room and dining area were combined into one large room. An open archway led to her small kitchen. There were three, closed doors at the far side of the room that led to her bedroom, a linen closet with a washer and dryer, and bathroom, respectively. On the wall in front of them were three, large windows she'd adorned with deep pink curtains. There was no carpet originally, so Kairi bought a few patterned rugs that she'd spread out to cover some of the dark wooden floor. She'd also filled the wall space with various paintings, photos, and décor so that the white wall could hardly be seen anymore. There was more she wanted to do with the apartment and she had a few boxes left unpacked in her room, but she felt at home.

"So, is Sora back in the townhome now?" Xion questioned, her face becoming progressively more flushed.

"Yes, he is," Kairi answered weakly. She wondered if Sora's delay in attending her party was on purpose. He'd made it clear to her that he wasn't happy with her decision to leave. She supposed it hadn't helped that she refused to fully explain herself to him. Kairi just couldn't bring herself to describe her nightmares, especially since his role was so antagonistic.

Riku cleared his throat. "Why don't we play a game or something?" he suggested. Kairi was grateful for the diversion.

Roxas grinned slyly. "I have an idea."

Axel perked up from his spot on the floor. "Rox, that game is not for the faint of liver. You'll kill everyone in this room but Xion and me." Axel paused and added, "And maybe Riku."

Roxas huffed, obviously offended Axel had not mentioned his name, "It'll be fine!" He turned to Kairi. "You got a deck of cards?" The suspicious look in Roxas's blue eyes made her wish she hadn't bought a deck of cards. She could only imagine what this game would require.

Still, they played. In a mere round, the group became a competitive mess and Kairi couldn't have been happier. She was so grateful to have such wonderful friends in her life. Even if they were a bit eccentric and loud.

"Drink up, Roxie!" Xion slurred with a flip of her short, raven hair, "I call, total and complete, bullshit!"

Roxas groaned and downed the can of beer in his hand. Kairi wasn't sure if she'd ever seen him drink at a regular pace. "W-Whatever," he hiccupped, "Riku's next. Call bullshit on him and stop targeting me!" Xion simply giggled.

Riku remained indifferent as he announced the hand he placed down, three 4's. No one questioned him, and then it was Pence's turn. Roxas groaned loudly and tried to sneak a peak of Riku's decreasing hand. Riku slammed his cards onto his lap and sent a glare in the blonde's direction. Roxas pouted, resting his head in his hand.

"What ya got in your hand, shortstack?" Axel questioned, he'd risen from her floor and was now sitting next to Kairi's feet.

"None of your business," Kairi replied as she organized her cards, "Stop trying to cheat."

"Me?  _Cheat?"_ Axel gasped, "That was hurtful, Kairi!"

"He is a cheater, Kairi!" Hayner accused with a judgmental frown, "He probably moved over there to get a glimpse of your cards!"

Roxas echoed Hayner's concerns. "That's how he always cheated off me in college. One minute you think he's trying to have an honest conversation and the next he's copying all your answers."

"Et tu, Brute?" Axel whined.

Kairi grinned. "Thank you for the heads up!" As her turn neared, she heard a knock on her door. Kairi stood, taking her cards with her (Axel stuck his tongue out at her), and went to answer the door. She wasn't surprised to see a shivering Sora on the other side. He seemed to bring the cold air inside with him as he rushed into the warmth of her apartment.

"You're late," Kairi pointed out as she took his coat from him, "Did you see any of my messages?"

Sora laughed, "Oh, don't be such a nag, Kai." She frowned at his choice of words; she hadn't meant to nag him. "I am sorry I'm late." He leaned in closer to her and whispered, "Did you miss me?"

Kairi pushed him away and feigned a laugh. There was something unnerving about his presence. She studied his face, trying to guess what it was, but nothing glared out at her. Ultimately, she decided to ignore the unsettled feeling in the pit of her stomach.

"Join us. We're playing a game Roxas suggested," she offered. Sora didn't seem off-put by her lack of response and happily followed her to the group.

"Hey guys!" Sora greeted cheerily. His grin seemed to cover half of his face.

An awkward chorus of welcomes and stares was what he received. Kairi felt her skin begin to prickle. It was one thing for Axel to be okay with Sora, but she hadn't thought about how the others would react to him. She watched as Sora made his rounds, eagerly shaking hands and making friendly comments. Axel offered his hand from his spot on the floor at the same time that Sora crouched down for a hug; it was the most awkward thing she'd ever seen.

Sora was undaunted, though. Either blissfully unaware of his cool reception or choosing to ignore it, he marched on. He eventually found his seat between Riku and Pence. He munched on cake and animatedly discussed photography with Pence.

As she plopped back down onto the couch, she couldn't help but notice how rigid Axel was. He'd recovered from the awkward hug and was still playing the game, but he seemed off too. Curiously, she tapped his knee with her foot. He raised a red brow at her.

"You're quiet," she stated.

Axel seemed to force a smile and waved her off with a hand. "Just planning my strategy." She didn't believe his explanation for one minute but chose to let the matter drop. She didn't want to make him talk in front of a room of people.

It wasn't long before she had her opportunity to get him alone. Axel stood once they'd finished their fifth round. He stretched his arms above his head and cracked his neck. "This has been fun gang, but I think I'm off," he announced with an exaggerated yawn, "Gotta get ready for work tomorrow morning."

Kairi hopped to her feet, dropping the cards that had been on her lap. "I'll walk you out!" she suggested too eagerly. She could feel both Sora and Riku staring her down as she walked Axel to the door.

"I think I can find the exit all right," Axel argued with a sheepish expression, "I've walked down these stairs before."

But Kairi wouldn't take no for an answer. She grabbed her jacket and followed him out. As she climbed down the steps after him, her legs wobbled to and fro. She would've tripped down the second-half of the last flight of stairs if Axel hadn't caught her arm.

"Slow down, shortstack. What's on fire?" he joked.

"I was worried," she blurted out, "I heard you made up with Sora, so I thought everything would be fine but then you got so quiet."

Axel seemed puzzled by her confession. "Who told you I made up with Sora?" he asked steadily. Kairi watched as his breath floated into the air of the darkened hall.

"Sora did. He said you ran into him in town." He grew silent. She could see the gears turning in his head. "…Is something wrong?"

"Nothing's wrong. I just didn't expect him to mention our meeting to you." He sighed and rubbed his head. "I wouldn't say we made up, but I did apologize. It's more accurate to say we called a truce, of sorts."

A truce? Kairi furrowed her brows. What could that mean? Could that be why Sora seemed to strange when he finally arrived? Her mind felt foggy as she struggled to think through her fleeting thoughts. She cursed herself for having such a generous helping of sangria so quickly. "Axel, I'm sorry if-"

"No apologies!" Axel laughed, seizing her shoulders. He leaned down to look her in the eyes. She felt herself blush from the proximity of his face. "Really, no more, all right? This isn't your fault. This is something I have to deal with."

Kairi's mind felt tingly as Axel's warm hands gripped her. She couldn't pinpoint what she was feeling; she just knew it felt really nice. But how could she feel such a thing with someone that had lied to her and broken her heart? "Axel, can I ask you something and you'll answer me honestly?"

"Scout's honor."

"When you said that you were going to tell me the truth on New Year's Eve, was that true?" Kairi was looking so deeply into his eyes she thought she was going to fall in. He didn't refuse her gaze. His hands seemed to tighten on her shoulders.

"I swear to you that was my intention, Kairi." His voice was a whisper; she could feel her heartbeat quickening as he continued. "The reason I was late that night was because I was picking up a late Christmas present for you. I was going to tell you everything, but when I got home I overheard you with Sora, and well, I'm sure you haven't forgotten."

She was drowning in questions and disbelief. It seemed too convenient that he was planning to confess the night Sora had visited the townhome. Surely, destiny wasn't that cruel? She found herself shaking her head and backing away from him. "How can I believe what you're telling me?" she implored, hoping he had an answer that would placate her.

Axel frowned and straightened his back. "I can't expect you to just take my word for it. I wouldn't ask that of you. But I hope one day you can trust me again." He released her and reached into the inner pocket of his jacket. "But I've wanted to give you this for a while now, so here." He placed a small, velvet box in her hand and stepped away. She rubbed her fingertips against the material, wondering what item could've been so important to delay him that night. "You should get back up there before Sora and Riku think I've abducted you."

Kairi watched wordlessly as he stepped out the door. Part of her wanted to chase him down and ask more questions, but she knew he was right. Sora and Riku were probably counting the number of minutes she'd been away. Xion too, for that matter. Just as she was about to turn and hurry back up the stairs, Axel poked his head back in the door.

"Hey, shortstack! This was in your mailbox."

She barely managed to catch the white, letter-sized envelope. As she walked up the stairs, Kairi tore open the back of the envelope and pulled out the folded sheets of paper inside. The sheets were thicker than regular letter paper and felt rougher against her cool fingertips. She tucked the envelope under her arm and unfolded the sheets to discover a sketch inside.

Kairi frowned. The drawing looked like it was done in color pencil. The scribbled lines created the image of she and Sora meeting at the clocktower. She could tell by Sora's obvious spikes and the violet hat on top of the redheaded girl in the picture. There was no mistaking the likenesses. She switched to the next page underneath and discovered it was another drawing of she and Sora having lunch in the farmer's market. The square, black table they'd sat at was even detailed. The last picture was of the two of them dancing in the snow.

Her hands were shaking. Was someone watching her? She quickly shoved the sketches back into the envelope and tucked them deep into her jacket pocket. As she re-entered her apartment, she pretended nothing was amiss and rejoined the group with a false smile on her face. One that even Riku couldn't discern.

Something was very wrong.


	40. Terror

Kairi sat on the edge of her bed staring at the beautiful trinket in her hand. She'd opened Axel's gift as soon as everyone had gone home for the night. It was a heart the size of her palm that seemed to be carved from some kind of crystal. In regular lighting, it appeared to be a lovely shade of pink. But when she held it to the light, the heart sparkled red and looked as though flames were dancing on the inside. She absolutely loved it.

The joy of receiving the gift almost outweighed the terror that had accompanied the mysterious envelope without a return pages she'd received were on her black bedside table.

She clutched the heart to her chest and exhaled shakily. If only the memento could comfort her like Axel used to. Her mind had been swarming with questions since she'd opened her mail.  _Should I tell someone what I received? What if it's just some prank I'm taking too seriously? What if Sora's trying to be romantic and I'm freaking out over nothing?_

Kairi let the charm drop into her lap and grabbed the pages again. She carefully studied their lines, scrutinizing every colored mark. She'd grown up with Sora; she knew what his art looked like. As much as she hated to admit it, the illustrations were better than anything Sora could do. She held up the page depicting their dance in the snow, changing the angle every few seconds.

"Then again, the way my head is drawn kind of looks similar to what he carved in the secret place," she concluded with narrowed eyes, "It could be…" Kairi decided to settle the matter once and for all. She refolded the pages and set them in their place, then retrieved her phone from under her pillow.

She quickly dialed Sora's number and waited for him to pick up. Thankfully, he did after a few rings.

" _Kairi? What's up?"_

He sounded like he was in the middle of something. What Sora could possibly be doing past midnight was beyond her, but she decided to keep her inquiry short. "Sora, did you send me anything in the mail?"

There was a pause. " _No, I don't think so. Why?"_

Her heart skipped a beat. "Oh, no reason. I-um, was talking to the landlord and he said some of my mail might have gotten re-routed is all." It was a lie. A stupid lie at that. But for some reason, she couldn't bear to tell him the truth. Surely, she was just overreacting and there was no reason for her to get everyone worried.

" _Oh, nope. Do you want me to ask Riku if he sent you anything at work tomorrow?"_

Kairi quickly objected, "No, no. I'll ask him myself. Thank you, though. Night, Sora."

" _Night, Kai!"_

She let the phone slip out of her trembling hands and onto the bed. Kairi jumped from her spot and hurried to each window in her apartment and shut the curtains. Someone was watching her; she was sure of it now. As she trudged back into her bedroom, she wondered again if she should tell someone. What if whoever drew the pictures tried to harm her?

Kairi hesitated, glancing at her night stand again. The pictures were harmless enough… She shook her head. "No, it's probably just a coincidence! I'm freaking out over nothing!" she declared with false confidence. She jumped into her bed and pulled the fuchsia covers over her. "Tomorrow, I'll get up for work and everything will be fine. It's just a fluke."

And so it was. Kairi got dressed, ate her breakfast, and went to work with an empty mail slot. She'd never been more relieved to not have any mail. It was easier for her to breathe and do her job knowing that.

At 4:30 PM, she finished for the day and walked out of the building to see Sora standing outside. He grinned and waved at her.

"Sora, what are you doing here?" she asked as she approached where he was standing. She was grateful it was warmer outside that afternoon, she'd hate to find Sora chilled to bone outside her workplace again.

"I'm on a break and thought we could get some hot chocolate?" he suggested hopefully. The expression on his face seemed contrived. Like, he was trying to cover something up. The more she studied him, the more worried she became. The glow was missing from his eyes. His smile didn't even pack a punch.

Kairi pursed her lips. She'd been hoping to see Axel that evening so she could properly thank him for the charm. However, something was clearly going on with Sora. Perhaps he'd come all the way to see her to confide in her.

"All right," she relented with a smile, "I have some time."

"Great." Sora offered her his arm and together they walked the short distance to the Golden Brew. Kairi had never expected to go to that coffee shop with Sora again, not after he'd begged for her forgiveness that day. She glanced at him from her periphery. He was humming a tune to himself as they walked. His behavior seemed relatively normal, despite all her other observations.

"How are you, anyway?" Kairi asked, hoping to steer the conversation to his condition.

Sora stopped his humming and met her scrutinizing gaze. "Oh, me? I'm fine, Kai." He seemed to hesitate before adding, "Can't say much has changed since I saw you yesterday."

_Sora, I thought you said you weren't going to lie anymore._ She thought as he pulled the door open for her.

* * *

Kairi approached the outside door of her apartment with trepidation. As she neared the entrance, she squinted to see if anything had been shoved into her mail slot. She didn't see anything and let out another sigh of relief.  _So it was a fluke…_

With a pep in her step, she hurried up the stairs and was surprised to see Axel standing in front of her door. She'd thought she was going to have to track him down herself. Then again, she supposed she should've expected as much from him. Axel loved to pop up out of nowhere.

"Yo," he greeted with a small wave. Her eyes dropped to his other hand that was carrying another, white envelope. Her chest constricted. Surely, it wasn't? "Saw this in your mail, so I thought I'd bring it up to you," he explained, "Promise I wasn't snooping."

Kairi stumbled on the last step, forcing Axel to catch her.

"Whoa, Kairi, what's the matter?" he asked. His voice was dripping with concern.

She feigned a brave face and nodded. "Sorry, I stopped to get drinks with Olette and Hayner after work," she lied through a smile, "Thank you for getting my mail for me." She unlocked the door to let him inside. Instead, Axel stood awkwardly in the doorway. She looked at him, suddenly hoping he would just leave so she could open the letter. "You're not coming in…?"

Axel shook his head. "No, I just thought I'd drop in on my way to Roxas and Xion's," he explained with a curious expression. He handed the envelope to Kairi, who nearly snatched it out of his hand. "Are you sure you're all right? You're acting weird. Even for having had a few drinks."

"Of course!" Kairi answered too quickly. She was falling apart, and she needed him to leave before her secret was out. Besides, she wasn't even sure if there were more sketches in the envelope. Even though her name was written on the front in the same handwriting…She felt herself shudder.

He stepped closer to her and placed his hand on her forehead. "Hmm, it doesn't feel like you have a fever," he concluded after a few seconds, "Stick out your tongue?"

Kairi pushed him away. "Look, I'm fine!" she exclaimed in a burst of anger. Axel's eyes were wide and his posture seemed to droop. She immediately felt guilty for snapping at him. Kairi took in a deep breath and attempted to pull herself together. "I-I'm sorry about that. You didn't deserve it, especially after you gave me something so nice."

Axel's face brightened slightly. "You like the charm?"

She dared meet his eyes, hoping her own didn't betray her. "Yes, I loved it, Axel. It's perfect." Kairi dug through the purse on her arm and pulled it out to show him. "I'm going to have it with me wherever I go." He stared at her as she held the charm as though he were taking a mental picture of the scene.

"I suppose the reason I chose that will sound cheesy now, but just know that I tried to design it based on what I thought you'd like."

Kairi felt the blush spread across her face. She could only think of one reason he'd pick a heart that looked like it was on fire. "O-Oh, um…"

His palm shot up to his forehead. "And I've made it awkward, heh. Sorry, shortstack."

She reached and tugged his arm down, covering his larger hand in her smaller ones. "Don't worry about it, okay?" She smiled at him, genuinely. "No matter the reason, I love it and I am so thankful you took the time to pick it out."

Axel's eyes seemed to soften. She felt his free hand find its place on top of hers. "I was happy to, Kairi."

The atmosphere thickened quickly. Kairi could feel a familiar tingling, warm sensation rush through her stomach and to the rest of her body. How was it that with everything happening she could still feel this way with Axel? She'd just been in Sora's company and felt nothing close to the comfort and elation she felt holding Axel's hand in her own. She was reeling.

She searched Axel's eyes for any indication that he was also thrown for a loop by their unrelenting chemistry. What she found made her shiver. Kairi felt as though she was traveling back in a time to a moment where Axel had her trust and her heart. Suddenly, touching his hand wasn't enough. She freed one of hers and placed it on his chest. But that wasn't enough either.

Simultaneously, their arms wrapped around one another. Kairi rested her head on his torso, holding tightly as though he might disappear. She could feel the weight of his head atop hers. She'd craved this comfort. She'd cried for it to come back to her more than she wanted to admit. Axel was her–

This was ridiculous.  _She_  was ridiculous. She'd clearly forgotten how charming Axel could be and was playing right into his hands. Kairi released him with a blink and stepped away. Balling her fist, she placed it on her chest and refused to meet his magnetic gaze. "Well, you shouldn't make Roxas and Xion wait any longer..."

Axel also took a step back, arms dropped to his sides. He seemed almost apologetic as he practically whispered, "Right…See you around."

As soon as he was gone, Kairi locked the door and fell against it. She hated how agonizing it felt to say goodbye to him like that. She hated how she missed his arms already, but she didn't have time to pine for Axel. Not now.

Once she'd composed herself, she closed the door to her bedroom and gently sat on the end of her bed to open the envelope. Like the last time, folded sketching pages were inside. She opened the first page and was horrified at what she saw. It was a scribbly, color pencil image of herself standing in front of the door to her apartment building. The second illustration was of her and Sora sitting in the Golden Brew. The name was even inscribed on the top of the page. The last picture was a complete surprise. It was merely a sketch of the main plaza of Twilight Town.

Kairi let the pages fall on her lap. Someone was definitely following her. There was no doubt in her mind. Her main questions were, why and what were they trying to accomplish? She grabbed the new sheets and put them with the old ones on her nightstand.

It was possible that she wouldn't receive any more mail. Perhaps whoever it was felt like they'd made their message clear and would leave her alone from now on. She rolled her eyes at herself. "I'm not even making sense," she muttered as she began pacing the length of her bedroom.

_I have to get to the bottom of this. I'll figure this out without worrying anyone. I can take care of myself._

How Kairi wished she had been right. Over the week she'd amassed 21 sketches, each featuring herself with Sora or another friend and a drawing of town. She couldn't deny how terrified she was anymore. In fact, her terror carried into her dreams. She thought she'd stop dreaming of evil Sora once she left the townhome, but the sketches brought him back to her mind with full force. She'd dreamt of being chased by him three nights in a row and it was draining her.

Kairi was pacing her bedroom, sketches lined across the floor in the order they were received, muttering to herself in her pink, flannel pajamas. "It's Sunday," Kairi thought aloud, "There's no post on Sunday. I can't possibly receive anything today."

The thought of having an empty mailbox flooded her chest with hope. "There's no post on Sundays!" she nearly shrieked. Hurrying out of her room, she slipped on a pair of tennis shoes, grabbed her winter coat, and hurried down to her mail slot. As she emerged from the entrance door, her confidence deflated upon seeing another white envelope addressed to her.

Kairi snatched it with a huff and opened it as she climbed the stairs. "I should've known," she mumbled angrily, "Clearly they aren't using the mail system if there's no return address."

She barely managed to kick off her shoes before trudging back into her bedroom. Kairi yanked the bundle of paper from its holder and spotted a small slip of paper on top of the stack.

' _What's lost cannot be regained. Come see for yourself. I've shown you the way.'_

Kairi scrunched up her nose. Could the message be anymore cryptic? She unfolded the larger sheets and yelped as something heavier came tumbling out. Her heart nearly stopped as she gazed at the object; it was her lucky charm. The one made of Thalassa shells that she'd given to Sora years ago. She picked it up by its chain and held it in front of her face. Sora told her he'd lost it. It was clear to her now that it was taken from him. Kairi glanced at the note again. Could it be that all of this was less about her and more about Sora?

She finished unfolding the other pages and discovered three new drawings. The first sketch was of Sora walking through a forest with Axel; a forest that Kairi was sure she'd seen in another picture. The second was of a large, brown mansion and the huge front gates that protected it. They appeared to be slightly opened, wide enough to slip inside. The final sketch was of Sora's head peeking out from a white blanket on the ground.

Time seemed to stop as she processed the picture. Kairi could've screamed. She brought her hands to her head as her breathing became erratic. She was panicking, dots were beginning to speckle her vision, her entire body was trembling. Sora was in danger. Something terrible was going to happen to him.

Her eyes fell on the message again. Who could be so cruel as to invite Kairi to watch Sora be harmed? She paused on the last line, letting it soak into her mind. "I've shown you the way?" Kairi gasped, nearly crumpling the paper in her fearful hand, "What does this even mean?"

She gazed upon all the pieces of paper she'd laid out on the floor. Each of them featured something from her day, but she also noticed there were several sketches that were just of areas of Twilight Town. Kairi gasped again, could this person have sent her a map? She snatched each image of Twilight Town and began forming them into a row on the floor beside her. Within a few minutes, she'd assembled a trail that led from the street outside her apartment building, through the main plaza, to the outskirts of town, and into the forest. The last drawing was the one she'd received of the mansion. As Kairi stared at the colored lines, she couldn't shake the feeling that she had been there before.

She crawled over to one of the boxes on the floor and pulled out her photo album. As she flipped through the pages, Kairi struggled to fight the waves of nostalgia. Sora was in nearly every picture in her collection. Her throat constricted; the thought of not being able to make more memories with him was unbearable. Before she could get too carried away by her anxiety, Kairi flipped to the picture with the mansion. She remembered it clearly now; Sora and Riku had climbed the wall.

Kairi knew what she had to do as she tucked the charm into her jacket pocket. She had to go rescue Sora before they could hurt him. Without wasting time to change out of her pajamas or even brush her hair, she was out the door.

_Don't worry, Sora. I'll save you, I promise._


	41. Wretchedness

Kairi rushed through the streets in nothing but her pajamas, a halfway zipped jacket, and a pair of rainboots covered in polka dots. She was sure she was attracting all sorts of attention, but she didn't have time to care about what other people thought. Sora was in danger.

As she hurried toward the hole in the wall, her childhood with Sora seemed to flash before her eyes. The thought of not seeing his smile or hearing him laugh ever again pained her. Her eyes were stinging from unfallen tears and the cold air that was blowing in her face. She ducked down into the opening in the brick wall, even though it was unnecessary, and nearly slipped onto the mossy trail.

"… _but Kai, you gotta know, I'll always comes for you. No matter what."_

Kairi stumbled through the forest, wishing she was faster, stronger, smarter,  _anything_  that could've helped her see what was happening before it came to this. Instead of being so absorbed in her own suffering, she should've paid more attention to what Sora was trying to tell her. All those dark glances and smiles that didn't reach his eyes, Kairi should've seen through them.

_Sora gazed into his hot chocolate, hands clutching the sides of the paper cup. "Kai, do you remember when we were kids on the island?" he asked. His voice was tinged with sorrow._

_I frowned. "Of course I do, but why-?"_

_He met my eyes, that foreign smile greeting me from across the table. "I was just thinking about the games we used to play. You, Riku, and me. Knights and their princess, traveling the worlds. Seeing new sights."_

" _Those days are so precious to me," I admitted with a thoughtful hum, "What made you think about them?"_

_He turned his head to glance out the window. There was such an obvious longing in his eyes that it hurt my heart. I nearly reached out to touch him._

" _I was just wishing we could go back to those days," he confessed. For a split moment, he looked heartbroken; drooping brows, trembling lower lip, scrunched forehead. But it all disappeared when he turned to me again, and continued, "Things were easier then. We were all so innocent…"_

" _Sora?"_

_He chuckled flatly and shook his head. "Getting older has made me even sappier, huh?"_

Kairi had known it in her heart. Something had been wrong. Something had been very wrong. If only she'd pressed him more...

She entered the clearing, pausing to catch her breath in front of the gates. The iron doors were slightly open just like the sketch had illustrated. Kairi frowned as she dared to touch the cold metal with her bare fingers. The last time she'd been there they had been locked with a chain. Who could have opened them and for what purpose?

Her eyes caught sight of a white curtain billowing in the wind from an open window on the second story. She wondered if it had anything to do with the blanket that was covering Sora's body in the drawing. Kairi hurried through the junky yard and slipped inside the abandoned mansion. The entire place was decrepit; she was nervous she was going to fall through the floor as she silently crept toward the stairs leading to the second story.

It was easy to tell the place had once been luxurious. If she'd had the time to, Kairi would've loved to imagine what the wooden interior and lush carpets looked like in their prime. She clutched the banister as she carefully shuffled up the steps, not wanting to do any more damage to the place. Besides, the last thing she needed was to fall into the wood. She couldn't save Sora if she was stuck trying to save herself.

Kairi's first step on the landing was hesitant. The floor seemed to groan under her weight.  _How old is this place?_ She sniffed the air as though the stale scent would give her a clue. There were two paths she could take; right or left. To her right, there were even more cobwebs and torn up flooring. To her left, seemed cleaner; it was also the direction she believed the open window was in. She decided to go that way.

She could see a door at the end of the hall that was slightly ajar. There seemed to be sounds coming from the room, but she couldn't discern what they were. As she approached, she tried to think of a plan. If this mysterious sender became violent, how was she going to combat them? Kairi didn't know any fighting moves and she hadn't brought any weapons either. She paused; maybe she could find something in the hall?

Unfortunately, all the hall had to offer was dust mites and cracked wallpaper. If it came down to it, she'd have to go for the cheap shots. Kairi slipped her hand into the pocket that contained her precious charm. She pulled it out and paused to look at the small face she'd drawn on the front. The smile gave her strength and hope that she could save one of her dearest friends. Clenching her fists, she continued creeping toward the door. She could hear the sounds more clearly now; they sounded human, like whispers. Then she heard it. A grunt from what sounded like Sora.

It was as if she'd been struck by lightning. Every muscle in her body tensed; she was ready to pounce. Kairi rushed through the open doorway and wildly gazed around the blindingly, white room until her eyes found Sora. Every fiber in her body went limp at the sight.

_Is this…real?_

Sora was underneath a white blanket, but he was very alive, and not alone. Kairi could see the muscles in his back rippling as the white blanket dropped from his shoulders and slid to his waist. He was naked and atop the blonde woman she'd seen in town; the one that seemed to know who she was. Her stomach plummeted to the floor.  _She_  was Naminé.

Sora was making love to Naminé on the floor of an abandoned mansion. Even after all the trouble he caused over the holidays on Destiny Islands. Even after he said things were over between them. Even after he'd spent so much time trying to regain Kairi's trust and affection. He was there, under a thin blanket, with  _her_ as she whimpered and mewled for him.

Naminé's head thrust back against the floor as she raked her nails into Sora's tanned skin. Sora's hands tangled into her long hair, cupping the back of her head so he could place a long, wet kiss on her quivering lips. Kairi watched the rise and fall of his hips quicken underneath the blanket. Naminé's legs slid along his as though they were unsure where to go or couldn't get to their destination fast enough.

He released her lips, lifting himself from her body and evoking another whine from her glistening mouth. Sora's head dropped to her ample bosom. She clutched his head closer to her skin as he ravished her with his tongue. He left a slobbery trail in his wake as he gently crossed the distance from each breast and up to her ivory neck. He paused at her earlobe, whispering, "Naminé."

She opened her eyes at the sound. Their crystal blue was amorously misted as she stared into Sora's hair. The expression in her eyes didn't change when it shifted to Kairi's weakening form. In fact, Naminé looked liked she was enjoying herself even more.

Kairi wished she could blink it all away. That she could close her eyes and the scene before her wouldn't exist. Her already strong grip on the charm tightened. Sora was so engrossed in the woman underneath him, he hadn't even noticed she was there. Her resolve cracked.

He fervently continued to give his all to Namine as she watched Kairi frozen from the doorway. The frenzied movement, the wet, smacking sounds of their bodies, seemed to go on forever and Kairi committed every piece to memory. Finally, Sora cried out and fell against Naminé who happily cradled him in her thin arms. She cleared his sweaty bangs out of his face and lightly kissed his forehead, all while maintaining eye contact with Kairi.

Unable to take any more, Kairi took a step back, causing the floor to creak loudly. Sora jolted from his spot in Naminé's arms, looking at Kairi as though he'd seen a ghost. As much as she wanted to, she couldn't stop herself from covering her mouth with her empty hand and succumbing to the afflicted emotions within her heart. Sora was someone she no longer recognized. She couldn't even utter his name.

"Kairi, wait!" Sora cried, scrambling off Naminé and onto his feet. But she didn't wait. She ran. She ran as fast as her despairing feet would carry her.

Kairi didn't care what Sora had to say to her. She didn't care if he regretted it or wanted to apologize. All she cared about was getting as far away from him as possible. She fled through the front door with him still shouting after her.

She knew Sora wouldn't chase her naked, but still she zoomed through the front yard and into the forest. Her sprint came to an end as she stumbled into the trunk of a tree. Kairi gripped the bark with her hands and let her forehead rest against its the base. Even with her eyes clamped shut, she couldn't forget what she saw. The movements of Sora's pelvis and the look in Naminé's unwavering eyes haunted her mind.

Anger. Sorrow. Betrayal. Apathy. None of it felt right. But how could anything feel right when her whole world seemed to have flip flopped? The more she thought about it, the more she felt like she didn't have a right to be upset with him. After all, Kairi hadn't been able to conjure the romantic feelings she once had for him. Not after he'd cheated on her. Not after he'd come after her, guns blazing, without any regard for how she felt about it. But somehow, she was still hurting.

Kairi held the charm to her eyes. It was beautiful, even after all these years. The pinks and yellows that colored the shells were as vibrant as they had been the day she plucked them from the shore. Her stitches hadn't slackened. Even the chain at the head of the charm remained spotless. She'd poured her heart into the charm's creation, spending hours to get it just right for Sora.

"Was it a waste?" Her cracked voice seemed to echo through the quiet space. If only the trees could give her an answer. Did all the years she spent with him mean nothing if he was going to end up with Naminé on the floor of a broken-down manor?

" _What do you say, Kai?" Sora's blue eyes matched the ocean's steady waves as he watched me from his spot on the darkened beach._

_I stopped picking up shells from the shoreline to give him an incredulous look. His bare feet were spread out in front of him. He'd unbuttoned his white shirt and rolled up the sleeves as though he was home on the island and not on a public beach in Twilight Town. "What do you mean?" I nearly laughed, "I've already told you yes, silly."_

_He grinned; his smile shining brighter than the full moon above us. "I know. I just wanted to hear you say it again." Sora stood, dusting the sand off his dress pants. His arms wrapped around my shoulders and I sank into his chest. With a kiss to my temple, he whispered, "You've made me the luckiest man in all the worlds."_

_I held my left hand up to the sky. The ring he'd given me just a few hours ago displayed proudly on my finger. "And you've made me the luckiest woman."_

Kairi's knees buckled. She slammed the fist with the charm into the trunk of the tree, crying out as the skin of her hand was scraped. She was probably bleeding but it was nothing in comparison to the emotional anguish that had settled upon her. She wanted to scream. She wanted to curse the day she met Sora. She wanted to take everything back. But she couldn't.

What happened to them? What could she have possibly done to deserve this? In her mindsight, Kairi could still see the small boy from the islands running around in his red shorts and white t-shirt without a care in the world. She could perfectly imagine the innocence of his eyes, the kindness of his smile, and the dimples he'd never outgrow.

Sora was the first one to befriend her when she moved to the islands. He was the one who sat next to her and asked her what was wrong when he found her crying on the beach. Instead of teasing her, he'd smiled and patted her back as she told him how much she missed the parents she never knew and the kind grandmother that she'd loved with all her heart. Through him, she met Riku and the other kids on the island. All that she became was because of him. There was no Kairi without Sora, but there was clearly a Sora with or without Kairi.

Her eyes darkened. Sora had never needed her to begin with, had he? She'd always been the one that needed him more, that loved him more. Kairi wiped the tears and snot from her face on the sleeve of her jacket. She stole one more glance at the charm and made up her mind.

There was only one place to go now. Back to where it all started: the ocean. It only made sense that everything should end on the shoreline as well.

Shoving her hands into her pockets, she trudged back to the opening in the wall.


	42. Fragility

Axel closed his briefcase, enjoying the small clicking sound the golden latch made. He'd had a full day of lesson planning and was ready to go back to his small apartment on the east side of Twilight Town. It was a small studio; sometimes he thought if he stretched he might be able to cover the full length of his apartment with the tips of his fingers and toes, but anything was better than staying in a hotel.

He shut off the lights of his classroom and headed toward the front doors of the empty school. His thoughts noncommittally wandered from what he'd cook for dinner to what program he should watch with his meal. He was mostly trying to talk himself out of going to visit Kairi on the way home. One, her apartment wasn't even in the same direction. Two, he still wasn't sure what to say to her after their last awkward encounter.

The way she'd looked at him and willingly leaned into his grasp…he'd thought just maybe she felt something for him too. Axel had been watching her closely as Riku suggested, attuning himself to the nuances of body language and facial expressions. All his examinations pointed to the possibility of her affection, but she refused him every time things got too personal.

His intentions toward her remained unchanged. If she'd consent to it, he'd give her everything. But he knew better than to tell her that. Yes, he was lucky that she even wanted to talk to him. If anything was going to happen between them again, she was going to initiate it. He wouldn't pressure her. Not again.

Just as he'd reached his car, his phone began vibrating in his pocket. Axel plucked it out effortlessly and answered without bothering to check who it was. Ever since he'd reconnected his phone, he'd gotten so many calls from students asking about his assignments that he'd stopped bothering. More than 75% of the time it was one of his slackers asking for an extension.

"Yello, Professor Fierro here," he answered as he turned on the engine, "If you're wondering about that essay, the syllabus clearly states-"

" _Axel, it's Riku."_

Axel hesitated. He didn't even know Riku had his number. Then again, he supposed he might've given it to the man after Kairi had her incident. "Riku, eh? What's got you calling me of all people?"

" _I'll explain everything when you get here. Just come to Kairi's. It's urgent."_

The blood in his veins seemed to slow. He should've known Riku wasn't calling just to 'chat'. "I'll be right there." Axel didn't waste time with goodbyes. He shifted gears and drove in the direction of Kairi's apartment.  _Please be okay…_

* * *

Axel rushed up the flights of stairs and didn't bother with knocking. He burst through the door and was surprised to find the apartment empty. Kairi's lamps were all turned on and the curtains were strangely closed. Kairi loved natural light. He couldn't think of a single time that she'd ever closed a curtain while he was living with her.

"I'm back here!" Riku's voice sounded from Kairi's bedroom. He hadn't been inside there, and he wasn't sure he ought to venture into her personal haven now. If Riku hadn't used the word 'urgent', he would've declined.

Axel hesitantly approached the doorway, only to toss all his qualms to the side. Kairi's floor was littered with cryptic sketches. Riku was standing among the drawings with his arms crossed and his jaw set.

"Gonna guess these aren't Kairi's entries for an art contest?" Axel asked as he began examining each of the pages on the ground. Most of them featured Kairi and Sora. Though, he was surprised to see himself in a couple.

He caught sight of a familiar, white envelope on the ground. He stooped to pick it up. As soon as he saw the handwriting on the front his suspicions were confirmed. It was the same as the script he'd seen on the two he'd handed her. Kairi had been receiving these pictures in the mail.

"Kairi was supposed to meet me for lunch at one," Riku began. Axel could hear the worry in his voice and it terrified him. Riku was an impenetrable fortress when it came to emotion, unless something was happening with Kairi. "I thought she was running late, but when she didn't show after an hour of waiting I started calling her. She never answered. I called Olette to ask if she'd seen her, but she hadn't. Then I came here, thinking she might've forgotten but no one answered the door, even after I pounded on it. I went home to get the spare key she gave me only to come back and realize the door had been open the entire time. That's when I discovered all of this."

The saliva in Axel's mouth thickened as he listened to Riku recount his afternoon. It wasn't like Kairi to be late. It wasn't like Kairi to not answer her phone. And Kairi never left her door unlocked, even when she was home. "Maybe something came up at work and her phone is dead?" he suggested quietly.

Riku shook his head and pulled Kairi's phone from his pant pocket. He handed it to Axel. "I called Hayner too. Olette said he went in today. He didn't see her."

The gravity of the situation fell on Axel's head like a pile of bricks. Kairi was missing and no one had heard from her. Her front door had been unlocked and she was receiving strange sketches in the mail. Axel double checked the envelope in his hand; there was no return address. Even worse.

"What do we do?" Axel questioned, trying to remain calm, "She's out there somewhere."

Riku produced another piece of paper from his pocket. "I found this on the floor with the sketches. It's in the same handwriting." Axel took the paper from him and read its strange message. "I think she went after whoever has been sending her these. Did she mention anything to you?"

"No," Axel admitted with a frown. Kairi hadn't told him anything even as she'd taken the letters from him. He knew she'd been acting odd and she hadn't said a word. He cursed himself; it was his fault she didn't trust him enough to tell him in the first place. How many times was his jealous blunder going to bite him in the ass?

"I tried calling Sora, but his phone is off or something," Riku sighed, "Since he's in so many of the sketches I thought he might know…"

_Leave it to Sora to be unreliable in a crisis,_ Axel thought as he re-read the note. "I've shown you the way," he murmured before glancing at a section of the sketches that were set off to the side. They were all of Twilight Town and seemed to end in that forest he'd been walking through. He paused; he'd run into Sora there. "What's lost can never be regained…Say, Riku, does Sora go to that mansion often? The one in this picture."

Riku furrowed his brows. "He hasn't said anything about it to me." He picked up the photo album from the floor, looking at the picture it was left open on. "I can't remember him saying he went back after this day. He thought the place was creepy."

"It kinda seems like someone was trying to get Kairi to go there," Axel suggested with a rub of his chin, "And my guts telling me Sora is connected to the reason. I ran into him around there. He told me he was just walking, but…seems fishy now."

Riku's eyes seemed to light up. "Sora must be the thing that's being lost," he concluded with renewed energy, "If that's the case, then all these sketches have to be from…" He faced Axel with determination. "We have to go there.  _Now_."

"I'll drive us to the opening. It'll be faster," Axel offered as they stormed out of Kairi's bedroom. They jumped in his car and Axel wasted no time in speeding toward their destination. There were only two or three hours left until the sun set and he didn't want to imagine what it would be like searching the town for Kairi in the dark.

Riku was tense. His body was pulsing and Axel was sure he was grinding his teeth even though he could not hear it. The way he'd looked when he'd mentioned the sketches... there was only one possibility Axel could think of that would send Riku into such a fury. His mouth went dry from the thought. He could only hope Sora wouldn't be so stupid as to fool around with Naminé in that deserted mansion.

"Riku, you don't think-"

"Don't ask me. I have to see it with my own eyes." If tones could kill, Axel would be dead. He resolved not to speak for the rest of the journey. Riku might just release some of his tension on him if he didn't watch himself.

Axel parked next to the wall, not wasting his time on whether it was legal or not. Together, they ran through the hole, past the trees, and into the clearing. The silence that had once been soothing was now eerie. Axel's skin seemed to prickle as they approached the front door of the building.

As soon as they stepped inside, their fears were confirmed. He'd been right to suspect something was off that day he ran into Sora. The man of the hour was pacing the second story hall in nothing but his boxers and a black coat. Naminé was standing nearby wrapped in a white blanket.

"But she saw! She saw us together!" Sora raved, his hands waving wildly, "How can I explain this? What can I do?"

"Sweetie, you're making something out of nothing," she cooed, "This is a good thing, don't you see?"

Sora shook his head. "No, I-I didn't want this. I wanted-"

"Sora!"

Axel jumped. The sound of Riku's voice cut through the entire building, disturbing the layers of dust that had piled up from years of neglect. Genuine fear seemed to light Sora's irises. "Riku, how did you-?"

"What have you done?" Riku thundered, "Where is Kairi?"

Sora looked away. "I don't know," he confessed, "She wasn't supposed to see this."

"Funny, you'd say that. It seems that Naminé wanted her to," Riku nearly snarled, "She's been sending Kairi sketches in the mail and in doing so, invited her to come see why Kairi would never get you back."

Sora's face dropped. His eyes seemed to harden as he paused. "There's...no way she could do that. Nam isn't like that." As if to ask for reassurance, Sora turned to her with a pleading expression. She hurried over to him and wrapped her arms around him.

"I would never do that, Sora. Kairi found this place on her own," she whispered sweetly, "Right, Sora?" He nodded absently, as though he'd agree with anything she said.

Axel wanted to puke. Riku, however, looked like he wanted to rip Naminé off Sora by her hair. The blonde merely smiled, caressed Sora's cheek, and then turned to face them. "Sora is too distressed to talk to you right now," she explained politely, "Perhaps we could discuss this some other time?"

"Cut the bullshit, Naminé," Riku demanded, "Sora can speak for himself. Tell me what happened."

Rather than answering, Sora's eyes stayed on Naminé. So she replied for him, "You heard before. Kairi saw us together and ran away once she was finished watching."

Axel's blood boiled over. Angry tremors were beginning to course through him. "And you didn't go after her?" he hissed with an indignant toss of his hands. The brunette shook his head, pissing him off even more. "You're something else, you know that? How long ago did she leave here?"

Sora opened his mouth but instead of speaking words, he groaned and looked at the floor.

"Who knows," Namine eventually answered as though it really didn't matter to her.

His mouth was speechless, but his fists had a ton of words they wished to say to Sora. How Axel longed to hit the man in the face again, but he knew that was not the best use of his time. Besides, judging from the contorted look on Riku's face, he knew what he felt was only a fraction of what was going on in the heart of his companion.

"Riku, I'll go find Kairi," Axel suggested, "I'll bring her back to her apartment safe."

Riku yanked his keys from his coat pocket and expertly freed the key to her apartment from its loop. Their eyes met for a brief second and Axel was surprised to see such darkness. He could sympathize, though; Axel was sure he'd had the same look in his own eyes when Sora walked into the townhome that day.

Something compelled Axel to say, "Remember what she'd want." Riku surprised him and simply nodded.

As Axel exited the gates, his eyes flickered to the sky. The sun was sinking lower and he had no clue where to start looking for Kairi. He huffed and dashed off into the forest. He just hoped she hadn't done anything reckless.

* * *

Axel wasted the rest of daylight looking in all the wrong places. He'd abandoned his car on a side street and chosen to search on foot, thinking Kairi might've wedged herself in a back alley or something. As he ran around like a chicken with its head cut off, he'd called Xion and Olette and explained the situation. The two ladies then roped in Roxas, Hayner, and Pence into the search. Though, the men didn't have to be asked twice. Kairi was their friend too.

He thought the six of them would have no problem tracking her down, but as darkness descended upon the town they still had no leads. The clocktower, her work place, her apartment, all of the back alleys the group could think of, sunset hill, and even the struggle platform were checked to no avail.

Axel was currently on the train, standing against a pole with his arms crossed over his chest. Before he'd left, Hayner and Pence had promised to check the sewage passageways. Roxas had begun going around to the shop owners and bartenders to ask if they'd seen Kairi. Xion and Olette were doubling back to her apartment and from there they'd go to the townhome.

They all had their phones on maximum volume and whoever found her was instructed to call immediately. And if Axel didn't find her where he was headed, the police would be informed. No one had heard from Riku or Sora, but Axel had no doubt in his mind that they were still arguing in that mansion.

His green eyes lazily glanced out the window, watching as flashes of the outside blurred past him. Axel's heart was as heavy as lead. If they didn't find her, he would never forgive himself. He was supposed to be someone she could rely on, but he'd messed up, and now she was out there handling all of it by herself.

Throughout his frantic searching, he kept imagining all the worst possibilities that could be easily summarized into two scenarios. Kairi harming herself or being harmed by someone else. He knew she wasn't defenseless; she could pack a punch if she needed to. But the 'what if's' wouldn't stop. If only she would've taken her phone with her. If only he hadn't lost her trust. If only Sora wasn't such a complete moron.

It was clear to Axel that Sora had changed for the worst. The man he thought he knew was honest, kind to a fault, and valued the well-beings of others more than his own. The Sora he'd seen pacing in his boxers was a shell of that man. Could Naminé have truly messed with his mind to the point that he wasn't himself anymore? Clearly, the woman was cunning. She'd set this whole trap for Kairi. Sweet, loving Kairi who deserved so much better.

Axel stepped off the train, inhaling the crisp, salty air. He could already smell the ocean from the station. He only hoped the expensive fare he'd paid to get there would amount to something. He hurried down the rows of stairs that led to the shore level. The night was quiet; it would've been peaceful if he wasn't so close to losing his shit.

His shoes crunched as he took his first steps onto the sand. The beach was desolate, but he'd expected as much. It was the middle of winter, after all. His eyes scanned across the horizon, searching for Kairi's small figure on the shore or in the waves. He was grateful to the moon in the sky; he wouldn't have been able to see anything without its glow.

Axel pivoted to the left and finally saw her. He wasted no time in running toward her, heart soaring from relief. She was alive and she was alone. No one had messed with her. She was moderately safe. She was standing in the freezing water. She was visibly shivering. He could hear her sobs. Axel's heart sank. Kairi wasn't okay. She wasn't anywhere close to safe.

"Kairi!" he shouted, "Kairi, get outta the water!"

She turned to face him, her indigo eyes illuminated from the moon's reflection on the water. "Axel?" Her voice broke through the chattering of her teeth. "N-No, don't stop me! I've finally decided to do it!"

Kairi had waded far into the ocean. The water was up to her waist. Twilight Town wasn't Destiny Islands; the tide was never warm. She had to be freezing. "No, Kairi, get outta there!" he demanded from the shoreline, "You're going to freeze to death!"

She ignored him, choosing to face away. "I-I'm going to do it," she croaked, "Don't s-stop me."

Axel's heart leapt into his throat. Did she  _mean_  to freeze to death? Or even worse, was she going to…? Like hell he was going to let her do that!

He jumped into the water, splashing about as he hurried to where she was standing. Kairi shrieked and raised one of her arms. In the moonlight, he could see a tiny object in her hand. He didn't have time to decipher what it was. He leapt toward her, wrapping her in his arms just as she released. They both watched as the object disappeared into darkness. Kairi crumpled into him, sobbing like she had in the hospital room.

He lifted her out of the water, cradling her in his arms as he stomped toward the beach. She thrashed about in his arms, screaming and crying, saying things about the ocean and beginnings that didn't make any sense. Axel took a moment to study her. She looked like a disheveled mess. Her hair was tousled all over her head and face. Her eyes were puffy with dark circles underneath them. Her jacket wasn't even properly zipped. Axel blinked; Was she still in her pajamas? And where were her shoes?

He set her down on the sand, kneeling in front of her. "Kairi, how long have you been out here?" Instead of answering, she continued fighting him. He restrained her arms and attempted to look into her eyes, but every time he caught a glimpse of them she looked away. "Kairi, would ya just look at me? Kairi!"

She was shaking violently now. Axel cursed himself for not driving. He needed to call someone. It would take too long for him to take her home by train; she was too cold for that.

"Kairi, I'm going to call an ambulance," he announced as calmly as he could. Looking at her in this state was breaking his heart. Kairi was pale, sopping wet, and her lips were an unhealthy shade of pink.

"N-No! Just let me stay. I-I need to s-stay," she argued. He watched as she slowly brought a shaking finger to her face and tried to wipe her eyes. "I'm fine."

"You're anything but fine, Kairi." He pulled out his phone and dialed the number before she could snatch it from his hands. Axel explained Kairi's condition and their location. After receiving some instructions for her care, Axel hung up. He inhaled sharply, "Kairi, we have to get you out of your soaked clothes…"

She surprised him and muttered, "F-Fine." Axel helped her pull her pajama pants off and toss them aside. Hesitantly, he placed a hand on her bare thigh; she didn't react. Her skin was ice.

He took off his coat and wrapped it around her once she'd set aside the wet jacket and shirt. Since she made no movement to cover herself, he buttoned the front around her arms. She still refused to look at him.

"Kairi, what did you throw in the water?" Axel found himself asking as he began rubbing her legs.

She coughed and replied, "My lucky charm."

Axel wasn't sure if she was speaking frankly or if this 'charm' was more delirious ranting. At any rate, if she kept talking he'd at least know she was hanging on. So, he asked her, "What lucky charm?"

"I made it for S-Sora when I was 14. It was s-supposed to always bring him back to me," she explained, the energy seeming to drain out of her voice, "He lost it and it was returned to me in the mail today."

The rage in his chest skyrocketed. He couldn't believe Naminé would stoop so low. "You're telling me that charm represented your entire relationship with Sora, basically?"

Kairi slowly nodded. "I did it. It's gone now."

Axel jumped up from the sand and turned to the ocean. The waves seemed to have picked up. There was a chance it might be pushed back to shore. He turned to her. "Stay here, I'll go and get it for you." He stomped through the water, ignoring the cries from Kairi. She was one of the most sentimental people he knew. There was no way she could want to part with something so important. He knew she'd regret it tomorrow if it was lost to her forever. Or she should at least be able to part with it when she wasn't so distressed.

He bent over and began digging through the water. He couldn't see well but hoped maybe it would hit his hand or something. Axel's arm was yanked away before he could go deeper. He looked bewildered as Kairi fiercely shook her head at him.

"Stop!" she cried, "I don't want to see it…e-ever again!" She was weakening by the minute. "Just stop…"

Axel yanked her from the water and dragged her to the shore again. "Didn't I tell you to stay put?" he grumbled as he sat her on the sand. "You could've just shouted or something."

She glared at him. "You weren't listening."

He carefully touched her wet legs. "Can you even feel anything?" he questioned with a frown.

"I don't want to feel anything."

Axel captured her gaze with his hand. She shook violently but didn't try to get away. "Kairi, stop this. You're going to get through this, okay? I know it hurts-"

"Don't talk to me like you know," she whispered, "You don't know anything."

"Yes, I do. I know what you saw. Riku and I went to-"

Kairi's lip trembled. "No, you don't know. You couldn't possibly know what it's like to see the man you loved with everything you have share his love with another woman." She took a breath and continued, "You couldn't possibly know what it's like to realize he's just been yanking your heart around all these months…w-while he flits around with her! How could you know how I felt? The guilt I carried all this time and realizing it was for nothing!"

_I looked through the crack in the door._

_Isa was there, seated in a plush, lounge chair across from our boss._

" _I thought you might have...reservations about acting so treacherously against your old friend. But you completed your task commendably."_

" _It was an easy task. Lea has always been a disposable ally. I am merely grateful you have taken interest in me, sir. I am honored to be at your service," Isa replied with a sinister smile._

Kairi didn't have to say another word. Axel wrapped her in his arms and held her tightly as her body shook from shivers and sullen cries. She didn't return his embrace, but he could feel her head finally sink into his chest after a few minutes.

"I'm sorry, Kairi. I'm so sorry," he whispered continuously. His words only made her sob harder. She was right; he didn't know what she'd been through, but he could imagine how terrible it was. He didn't let her go until he saw the lights of the ambulance flashing toward them.


	43. Promises and Transgressions

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, this is chapter is the big reveal. You'll understand what I mean when you read it. Please let me know what you thought!

Sora had never felt like such a failure before as he stood in nothing but his boxers and winter coat. He felt dirty, no, filthy, from what he'd done.

Riku's angry words splattered all over his ears, but he couldn't make sense of any of them. He couldn't make sense of why he was standing in an abandoned building warmed only by the body heat of a woman that wasn't Kairi. He glanced at her now, her blue eyes were gleaming.  _Could_  Naminé have orchestrated all of this?

The Naminé he knew was so gentle and kind, incapable of harming a fly. She was so frail, loveless, and alone in the world. Sora couldn't believe someone that had suffered so much at the hand of others would dole out that suffering in kind. No, she couldn't have lured Kairi to the mansion while they were together. It was impossible…right?

He felt as though the truth were an oversized weight threatening to crash down on his head if his arms gave out. Fear gripped his gut as he continued to stand, frozen to the floor.

" _Our destinies are intertwined forever now, Sora. Nothing can tear us apart anymore."_

Kairi's voice stung as it echoed through his head. He could see the love in her faithful eyes as though she was in the room with him. Sora could almost reach out and touch her face, soft and sticky from the juices of the paopu fruit she'd happily shared with him. They'd been so young when they made their pledge. He felt himself begin to sink.

His thumb was brushing the juice off her face – her giggles were ringing in his ears – they were in love. Sora was on his knees now, holding his head. How could he have forgotten? Namine knelt by his side. She was whispering something to him, but he couldn't hear it anymore.

_When did I lose her? No, when did I lose_ me _?_

The Beginning

Sora strolled into the break room on his floor to fix another cup of coffee. It was nearly 5 PM, and Kairi was waiting for him. He'd promised he'd take her out, and Sora wasn't about to break a promise to her.

He hummed a soft tune as he opened the pantry door where all the coffee, tea, and a variety of other pick me ups were stored. Sora nearly yelped as he flipped on the light switch. Naminé was wedged into the narrow space, crying her eyes out.

"Whoa!" he exclaimed, taking a moment to steady his racing heart, "Are you all right?"

She quickly wiped her eyes and nodded timidly. "I-I'm fine. Sorry to get in the way."

Sora frowned. The woman was forever apologizing; he was sure if he gave her the chance she would apologize for even breathing air. "Hold on," he requested, reaching over to the counter to grab a napkin, "Here." She quietly took the offering and began blotting the stray eyeliner and mascara that had run down her face. Sora stepped aside so she could excuse herself, but he couldn't just let her leave looking so distressed.

He hadn't known Naminé for very long, but she was his friend and when a friend was in trouble there was only one thing to do. "Do you want to come to my office and talk?" Sora offered. Namine froze; looking at him with miserable eyes. "I-uh, I have some candy…" She seemed to hesitate before agreeing with a small nod.

Sora led her through the halls to his newly private office and shut the door once Naminé was inside. He sat on the couch and indicated for her to do the same. She sat as far away from him as she could.

"Um, so," he began with a scratch of his head, "What's got you down, Nam?"

She didn't answer immediately. He watched as her gaze remained on her lap, where her hands were nervously gripping the fabric of her white dress. "It's someone I care about…"

Sora frowned. There was only one man she'd ever discussed with him: her ex-boyfriend, Marluxia. He'd hoped she was over him by now. It'd been a few months since he'd talked her into getting out of that mess. Sora took a moment to examine her, letting his eyes move from the blonde hair covering her face to the exposed, pale skin of her long legs. She didn't appear to have any new bruises, so he relaxed.

"You're not thinking of going back to Marluxia, are you?" Sora queried. Naminé shook her head. "That's a relief." The silence was heavy. Sora had never been comfortable with long silences, especially in situations like this. "So, what about this person is upsetting you?"

"I fell in love with him, but there's no way he could ever feel the same." Her hands tightened into fists. Her voice shook as she added, "I would've never been good enough for him, anyway."

Sora's frown deepened. Hearing Namine talk about herself like that hurt him. He placed one of his hands over hers. "Nam, that's nonsense. Anyone with eyes can see that they'd be lucky to have you in their life. You're more than good enough for whoever this guy is, okay? Have you even told him how you feel?" She shook her head again. Sora dared smile. "Then how can you know he doesn't feel the same?"

Naminé finally lifted her head. Sora could clearly see the tears shimmering in her aqua eyes. He faltered. "Because it's…it's you!" she confessed with a heave, "I love  _you_ , Sora."

Sora was speechless. He suddenly felt awkward sitting next to her with his hand atop hers. She loved  _him_? What had he even done to deserve such a strong confession from her? He scrunched his nose, feeling something uneasy bubbling inside of him.

"See?" she suddenly cried, "I'm disgusting to you. You can't even say anything."

His eyes widened. Disgusting? "W-Wait a minute, that's not-"

She shook her head, shaking his hand off hers and removing herself from the couch. She hugged herself, looking even smaller than before. "I know I shouldn't," she whispered sadly, "But every time you smile at me, my heart jumps. The way you laugh, the silly things you say, I feel so happy when I'm with you. But you have her so…I should just forget, right?" Naminé inhaled sharply, "But how can I?"

His mind screamed at him; he couldn't just leave her like this. In an instant, he'd wrapped his arms around her. Naminé cried more within his grasp but she didn't resist being pulled tightly to his chest. Sora choked down the saliva building in his mouth.

"You promised you'd never hurt me."

Sora felt like a knife had just dug through his heart. He  _had_ promised Naminé that. She was crying harder now than she had in the pantry. "I-I know," he stammered guiltily. He was making it worse, wasn't he?

She looked at him, desperation clear on her face. "Then, please, stop hurting me like this. I can't take it."

The look in her teary eyes was all it took for him to lose himself. Sora took her face in his hands and kissed her until he ran out of air. His mind was in a fog as his eyes re-opened. Naminé was clutched against him, breathing deeply. He looked around his office, gaze finding the bright red of Kairi's hair immediately. Looking at her smiling face in their picture together crushed him. He'd betrayed her; the woman he loved with all his heart.

Sensing his distress, Naminé grabbed his chin and forced him to look at her. "Sora, it'll be all right. I won't take you from her. Let's just pretend this never happened."

Sora could only nod as his thoughts zoomed through his brain. He'd have to tell Kairi. He'd have to tell her what he did, and he wasn't sure how she would react. Would she even understand what happened? Did he even understand what happened? He frowned; he wasn't even sure why he'd reacted that way to the sight of her crying over him. He retracted his arms and awkwardly stepped away from her.

"Okay. I'm sorry about this," he whispered, "Tomorrow, we'll start fresh."

Rather than continuing with his work, Sora went straight home and rushed into Kairi's arms. She didn't ask any questions or seem to think anything was strange. As they settled into bed for that night, Sora realized he didn't have the heart to tell her what happened with Naminé. He promised himself it wouldn't happen again and fell asleep to the sound of Kairi's steady breathing.

Sora cooped himself up in his office the next day. He tried to focus on his paper, but his mind kept slipping to the kiss he shouldn't have shared with Naminé. He knew she was around somewhere. Every time he wondered what she might be up to and thought he should check on her, his heart seemed to slow, and a mist would crawl over his mind. So, he remained where he was until 6 PM when he was sure no one else would be left in the office.

As he made his way to the elevators, Sora's breath hitched. He wasn't as alone as he thought. Out of the many lounge areas on the floor, she was sitting in the one nearest the elevators. Her hair was tied into a loose bun and her feet were tucked under her in the seat as she sketched in her favorite notepad. All he could do was gape at her from across the room.

Naminé looked up and met his gaze. She appeared apprehensive at first, but then she stood and walked toward him. The next thing Sora knew, he was back in his office, frantically kissing Naminé wherever he could. They didn't talk about it as they walked out of the building. Sora said good night to her and then ran to his car like something was chasing him.

As soon as he was home, Kairi greeted him with a smile and a kiss. She even said he smelled nice before trotting away and offering to reheat his dinner. Sora stood in the entranceway, feeling more torn than he ever had.

The pattern continued for weeks. The moment she looked at him with that vulnerable gaze, he was hooked, every time. He'd only wanted Naminé to be happy, to feel that she was lovable. Somehow, that had evolved into him being the sole provider of the love and confidence that she needed. Sora felt so out of control it scared him.

Kairi had no idea. She happily chatted about their approaching wedding at meals and snuggled him in her sleep. The secrecy was wearing on him. He had to do something. He couldn't keep this up. But how could he make them both happy?

Kairi was the love of his life. She had been since the day she stepped foot on the islands. He'd known from the moment he looked into her big, beautiful eyes that he would never be able to feel that for another person. But Naminé  _needed_  him. She'd said so herself that he made her happy, and she looked so miserable without him. She was so delicate and frail; he didn't want to break her. Not like Marluxia had. Sora wasn't like that…was he?

"Naminé, can we talk?" Sora asked when he'd found her at the vending machines. She nodded and followed him into his office. Sora chose to sit in his desk chair. She chose to remain standing. "Naminé, I-"

She shook her head, tossing her blonde tresses around. "I know what you're going to say. I-I've been waiting for this moment." Sora's shoulders dropped. "You think I'm a nice girl, but you have her so there can't ever be an us, right?"

That wasn't how he was going to say it, but the message was the same. Sora shamefully rubbed his face. "Ah, well, I'm engaged, Nam…"

Her voice trembled, "You love her. You've always loved her." Sora couldn't deny that either. But somehow, it still hurt to hear it come out of Naminé's mouth. He hadn't meant to slap her in the face with his successful relationship and the happiness he felt with another woman. He flinched. Since when had Kairi become 'another woman'? "I thought you were different," she concluded with a frown.

"What do you mean?"

She ran her finger across the surface of his desk. "Marluxia always played games with me. One minute, he made me feel like I was special and lovable, and the next he was hurting me," she choked out, "You're doing the same thing."

Sora's world came crashing down around him. Naminé was right; he hadn't been any better than Marluxia. He'd led her on, made her feel like she could be loved, and now he was taking it all away from her. For someone who prided himself on his ability to care for others, he'd acted like a total fool.

"I'm so sorry. I don't know how to make this better," he confessed, "I want you to be happy-"

She leaned across his desk and placed her hand on his arm. "Then be with me, please."

"But Kai-"

Her finger was on his mouth. Sora's eyes widened as he stared into her pleading ones. "Just for a little while, okay? I don't want to hurt her either, I just need you so much. I'm so alone…" The tears were already brimming in her irises.

Sitting there, staring into her eyes, Sora knew he only had one choice. He wouldn't be like Marluxia. If this would make her happy, he could do it for a little while. Hadn't he meant it when he said he wished for her happiness?  _Of course_ , he had. Nothing in life was easy. Happiness, least of all. He could help her out. Just for a little while, until she was okay on her own.

Kairi would understand when he explained it all to her one day. Nothing that happened with Naminé could ever change how he felt for Kairi. Kairi meant everything to him.

As Sora stood and pulled her face to his, he had no idea what he had doomed himself to.

 

* * *

 

Naminé was caressing his back and whispering sweet nothings into his ear. The sounds did little to comfort him. With her persistence, Sora was forced to regain his stance. Riku was still glowering at him from the first floor.

"I don't know who I'm looking at," Riku chided with dark eyes, "Sora, you've let her take everything from you." The look on his face was scarier than the one he had when he'd first discovered Sora's affair.

Sora glanced at Naminé's face. She still looked serene and composed. It was strange that she wasn't the least bit horrified by the situation. But the second he doubted her, guilt and shame surged within him. How could he think someone like her would be capable of such evil? Naminé wasn't toying with him. That wasn't like her at all...she'd always...she'd always wanted the best for him.

Point of No Return

Sora stood in front of the door to Naminé's apartment. It was nearly 10 PM and he knew she'd been waiting on him for hours. But what would she have him do? He couldn't  _not_  take Kairi out on her birthday. He grimaced as he remembered the disappointed look on Kairi's face when he'd told her he was going to drop her off at home and then go to the office and finish some work. She hadn't argued with him, but her silence spoke for her.

He couldn't keep this up. He couldn't keep thinking of excuses to blow Kairi off so he could spend time with Naminé. It didn't feel right.

He knocked and opened the door. Poking his head in, he could only see darkness. Sora slipped inside, locked the door, and kicked off his shoes. This was the first time he'd ever been to her place. Normally, they would spend time together at work after everyone left or they'd take the train and go across town. Something about being in the space where she lived seemed…intimidating.

"Nam?" he called, daring to step further into the apartment. She didn't answer him. Sora felt his way down what seemed to be a hallway, searching for a light switch. When he still didn't find one, he called for her again.

Instead of receiving an answer, he felt something wrap around his waist from behind. "I was beginning to think you weren't coming. I've been so alone," came her whisper.

"I told you where I was," Sora replied, stiffening as her hand caressed his stomach. "Kairi's birthday is-" He gulped as her hand continued to travel down his body. "-today." All the hairs on his body were standing on end. There was an electrical current in the air that was threatening to zap away his self control. "She wasn't happy that I left."

"When is she ever happy with you?" Naminé countered with a sigh. Sora froze as her words struck him like a brisk slap. "You'd give your life for her and she'd still find something to nag you about."

"S-She didn't nag me," Sora defended, trying to peel off the effect the words had left on him. Kairi wasn't like that. She was the most patient woman he knew. She was always putting up with his absences and long work hours without complaint. He hesitated; well, sorta.

"Oh, did she give you the silent treatment instead?"

Sora nearly choked on his spit. How could she have known? "It wasn't like that, Nam."

Naminé grabbed his hand and began leading him away from their spot in the hall. She pushed through a door and he found himself standing in her bedroom, which was lit by several white candles. His body felt like a sandbag as they sat on the edge of the bed.

With a toss of her long hair, she resumed their conversation. "I know you love her and want to see the best in her, but Sora, open your eyes. Can't you see how she's treating you?" she questioned with a soft look, "She's so controlling."

Sora scrunched his nose. Controlling wasn't a word he would've ever used to describe Kairi. Yeah, she wanted him home with her. And yes, she seemed miffed whenever he had to stay late or couldn't do what she wanted. But that didn't mean she was controlling, did it?

Naminé seemed to pick up on his conflicted thoughts. She rested her head on his shoulder and entwined her fingers with his. "I just want to look out for you, Sora," she assured, "It just seems like she's more focused on wedding planning than helping you realize your dreams and aspirations. I would want to be with someone that was more enthusiastic about my interests, not just their own. You taught me that, remember?"

"Kairi supports my work," Sora found himself arguing, "She always comes to my expos."

"Does she like them?"

Sora deflated and let his head sink. Kairi always talked about how bored she was and stood off to the side. She never even engaged in the conversations he had with his colleagues. "No, not really."

"What a weird way to support her future husband," Naminé sighed, "But I'm sure she makes up for it in other areas." He took a moment to think about this. So, what if Kairi didn't like psychology? There  _were_  other places she made up for it in the relationship. He was sure of it. Kairi did so much for him. "I just hope it compares to her bad attitude."

He floundered again, "Bad attitude?"

Naminé shrugged. "She just seems like she's really sarcastic with you all the time. Even in her texts. I don't think I've ever seen her praise you."

Sora was bewildered. Of course, Kairi praised him. He paused to think what was the last compliment she'd said to him. "She tells me I have a big heart," Sora offered with a frown. Somehow, the words didn't seem to be enough compared to all that Naminé pointed out.

She giggled, placing a kiss on his cheek. "Well, she's right about that. I love how sweet you are. I've never met someone with more devotion." He found himself blushing. Her praise seemed to warm his entire body. "I know I'm not supposed to be in this picture, but-"

"Nam, it's okay."

Sora met her eyes, drinking in the sight of her in the soft glow. Naminé was stunning, sweet, and she cared about him. Perhaps he could keep this up a little longer, for her sake. Someone like her deserved to be happy. He could work things out with Kairi later.

But the longer Sora kept his relationship with Naminé a secret, the more of a strain it put on him and his relationships with Riku and Kairi. With every lie he told, he could feel them drifting farther away and it terrified him. The thought of one of them catching him in the act haunted his every hour.

Not only that, but he was becoming more and more confused too. Looking at Kairi was beginning to frustrate him. Whenever she spoke to him, he was finding it harder to listen to what she was saying. When he asked Naminé about it, she'd told him maybe it was what Kairi was saying. And sure enough, that was the root of the problem. She didn't even seem interested in his work or anything like that anymore. In fact, whenever his work was brought up she did more complaining than anything. He hated it.

Sora sat his desk, watching Naminé sketch on the couch in front of him. Sometimes he wondered if he should just end things with Kairi and openly be with Naminé. The second the thought passed through his mind, he regretted it. How could he even think that?

"Sora?"

Naminé was staring at him. Somehow, she'd already sensed something was wrong. He chuckled and scratched his head, "It's nothing."

"I know you better than that," she insisted, gathering up her sketching materials. "Tell me what's wrong." She hopped onto his desk and placed her hand on his. " _I'll_  listen to you."

So, he told her. He told her all his worries and fears and she listened without interruption. By the time he was finished, Sora felt as though the weight of the world had fallen from his shoulders.

"Of course you feel uncomfortable with Riku, he doesn't really support you. Don't you remember telling me how he always has to outdo you?" she pointed out, bringing her fingertips together. Sora found himself nodding despite the strange stirring in the back of his head. "And you know how Kairi is."

Sora glanced at the picture of himself and Kairi. She'd forced him to take the photo that day, claiming they needed to record their memories. Kairi  _did_ have to have everything her way.

Naminé squeezed his hand. "But I know even toxic people can become irreplaceable. You're too trusting, Sora, and one day, it's going to get you hurt."

He frowned. Toxic? His best friends were toxic? He shook his head. Even if they were, he needed them. "Maybe I will, Nam. But I can't just-"

She placed a finger on his lips. "Say no more. I'll show you how to handle this." He smiled and nodded.

 

* * *

 

"Do you even hear me, Sora?"

Sora trembled, focusing on Riku who'd begun marching up the steps. He glanced around him, re-familiarizing himself with his aged surroundings. He'd gone so far in his mind that he'd almost forgotten what was going on around him.

"You can't handle this right now, sweetie. Send him away," Naminé insisted, clutching Sora's shoulders with her delicate hands.

Riku paused on the middle stair. "Sora," he sighed. The red anger seemed to drain from his face as he spoke. "You're my best friend and I can't sit here and watch her unravel you. I want to help you, but you have to let me. But if this is what you want, to be with someone who willingly uses manipulation and deceit to get her way, I can't be a part of that."

"He's already made his choice," Naminé concluded with another squeeze, "Haven't you, Sora? You know who truly cares for you."

The scowl that formed on Riku's face did not go unnoticed. Just like the pain that had been in Kairi's eyes. He glanced at Naminé; the suffocating, misty feeling surrounding him again as her features sank through his senses. He was scared of disappointing her. No... that wasn't right, was it? He was scared of  _her_.

Trapped

Using the key under her welcome mat, Sora let himself into Naminé's apartment. She hurried into the hall to greet him with a hug and a kiss. Sora felt numbed as he stared at her delicate figure. She lifted a tender hand to cup his cheek.

"Sweetie, what's wrong?" she cooed, letting her hand wander into his nest of brown hair.

Normally, Sora would've found this comforting, but nothing could comfort him now. He gently plucked her hand from his head. "This has to end," he whispered gravely.

Naminé placed her hand on her heart. She took his hand and attempted to lead him into her living room, but he snatched it from her grasp. The look in her eyes nearly killed him but he had no choice. "Sora, what are you-?"

He shook his head. "I-I can't, Nam. None of this was supposed to - Kairi wasn't supposed to get hurt. I can't even see her."

She attempted to touch him again but he flinched away. "Sora, don't do this. Do you know what you're doing to me?" Her voice sounded desperate; Sora could feel his heart breaking all over again. First Kairi and now Naminé. He couldn't do anything right, could he?

"I'm so sorry, Nam."

Before she could plead anymore, Sora turned and fled her apartment. His supposed best friend tried to talk to him when he entered his apartment, but Sora merely brushed past Riku and shut the door to the room he'd been given. He slumped onto the bed and let his head sink into his hands. He'd hurt Kairi. He'd hurt Naminé. What could Riku possibly understand about what he was going through? What could anyone? He'd never felt so alone.

_Oh, Kai. I'm so lost without you._

As the weeks passed and Sora grew more despondent. He floated from place to place, but had no real direction. He continued to ignore Riku. He only spoke to Naminé in passing. And he dreamed of returning home to Kairi's arms.

He dreamt of it so often, he convinced himself it was possible. Kairi had loved him as long as he'd loved her. Surely, she would agree to talk to him and then he could fix it. She'd take him back. She  _had_ to.

But Kairi wouldn't have him. She made it clear to him every time he tried to rekindle their special connection. Sora didn't understand how she could be so obstinate. Wasn't she suffering as much as he was? Then he figured out the reason on Christmas Eve: Axel. His Kairi was in the arms of another man and didn't need him anymore.

Sora stalked the streets of Twilight Town, consumed with thoughts of Kairi and Axel. He paused at the opening of a hole in the wall that lined the town. Without another thought, he stomped through to the thick forest on the other side. He'd go anywhere if it meant he could rid himself of these dark feelings.

As he trudged across the terrain, he spotted something white out of the corner of his eye. Sora pivoted toward the sight, adrenaline shooting through his chest. Naminé was there with her sketch pad in hand.

"Hello, Sora." He froze. "What brings you to this place?"

He shoved his hands in his pockets. "To be honest, I'm not sure…"

She closed her pad and took a step toward him. "Something's wrong, isn't it? You know you can tell me." Sora fell apart in mere seconds. Naminé held him and whispered reassurances that he let sink into his heart.

_I can give you everything you want if you come back to me. Things can go back to how they were. I'll show you what to do. She'll love you again._

_Riku must've known. You knew how Axel felt about her. You can't trust anyone else but me._

He believed her. Sora followed her to the mansion hidden in the forest and gave himself to her again.

As she wrapped her arms around his neck, she whispered, "Now you know you need me, don't you?"

He nodded as she kissed across his bare chest. "I'm so sorry for leaving, Nam. I was wrong…"

 

* * *

 

Naminé had done nothing but encourage him to lie to the people he loved the most. And every time he'd tried to get away, she'd found a new way to catch him. He'd come to rely on her for everything, because somewhere along the way he'd come to believe his own judgement couldn't be trusted. He'd let her drag him down to a place he never wanted to be.

Sora turned his head back to Riku. He could feel a knob growing in his throat, but he didn't care. "Riku, help me!" he cried, letting his unshed tears fall.

Riku was at his side in an instant, pushing him down the stairs as Naminé let out an agonizing cry.

"Sora, no, please-!"

Sora clamped his eyes shut as they passed over the last step. Riku tightened his grip on his arm as they swiftly moved toward the door.

"I-I can't be alone again. Please don't hurt me like this!"

Riku yanked the door open with more force than necessary. He began pushing Sora out the door, but he couldn't help but stop and take one last look at her. She looked possessed as she paced the hall, hugging herself. Riku finally shoved him through, but he still heard the last thing she said.

"You  _are_  just like him."

Sora nearly collapsed as soon as they were out of the gate. Riku caught him, dragging him along with a hooked arm. Sora couldn't see through all the tears that blurred his vision. He felt so weak and confused. Was he even capable of doing anything right anymore?

"Riku, I'm so sorry," he sobbed, letting his head drop into his own chest.

Riku heaved and yanked him into the forest. Sora could hear him grunting and cursing under his breath as he struggled to keep him from becoming a heap of mess on the ground. "Sora, pull yourself together," Riku hissed through his gritted teeth, "You're stronger than this."

"No, I'm not. I'm nothing with-"

Riku swiftly shoved him against the trunk of a tree. All the air was forced out of Sora's lungs. He could only gasp as Riku gripped the lapels of his coat. "Listen to me, right now. I don't care what nonsense she's put in your head. You are Sora Yuuki, my best friend, and one of the strongest people I know. You don't give up so easily. You always push on, no matter the odds, and drag me with you. Sure, you can be a little gullible, but that's okay because you have me. You just need to let me in."

Before he could say anything, Riku had enveloped him in a hug so tight the air he'd managed to get back was pushed out again. But Sora didn't care, he held onto Riku like he was his lifeline. After all, that's what he'd always been.

"I won't let go," Sora vowed, "I won't give up."

Riku released him and smirked. "Like hell you won't, I'm not going to let you."


	44. Support

_I was walking toward the light at the end of a darkened hall. I didn't know why I wanted to go there; I just wanted to._

_I reached the doorway and looked inside. It was a room lit by thousands of small, white candles. In the center of the room, on the floor, there was a man and woman tangled together underneath a white blanket. The sight made my eyes water but I wasn't sure why._

_I was compelled to step closer. The man had black hair and sweating, tanned skin. His head turned to look at me and I felt trapped in his golden eyes. He laughed, "Like what you see, Kairi?"_

" _Why are you doing this?" I asked, "I thought I was the one you loved."_

_He smirked, still pleasuring the woman beneath him throughout our conversation. "Who could ever love a loser like you?"_

_The woman raised herself up on her elbows. Her smile was sinister. "Do you want what I have so badly that you have to watch?" she mocked, "I can humor you and we can trade places."_

_I blinked and found myself underneath Sora. Instead of loving me, he was choking me. I gasped, gripping his hands with my own. He laughed at my effort, wringing my neck with all of his strength. The woman stood beside him, laughing, as my vision faded._

Kairi gasped, eyes wide and blurry, as she gazed into what seemed to be unending whiteness. Her body felt numb and it took all her strength just to turn her head toward the only sound around her. Someone was calling her name.

"Kairi, can you hear me?"

She blinked a few times, the red blob before her transforming into Axel's worried face. "A-Axel?" Her voice scared her; she sounded like someone had tried to shove a metal pipe down her throat.

He smiled. "Yeah, it's me. How ya feelin'?"

The question made her pause. Kairi wasn't sure how she was feeling. It felt like she was floating. "I-I don't know. Axel, where am I?"

"You're in the hospital. Seems you were a bit  _too_ cold," he sighed, "Do you remember anything?"

As if on cue, the memories flashed back into her mind. The mysterious sketches. Sora and Naminé. The beach. Her lucky charm. All of it. The floating sensation abruptly ended as her whole body began to ache. She frowned and replied, "I do. I'm sorry for scaring you."

He patted her head gently. "No worries. I'm just glad you're all right. Could you try not to endanger yourself anymore after this, though? Let's take the excitement level down, say, 10 notches?"

Kairi chuckled lightly, "I'll do my best." She glanced around the room, noting the machines and wires that were sticking out from her skin. She blushed as she realized how naked she was underneath the layers of blankets that were keeping her warm. She wondered what happened to her wet clothing. "When can I go home?"

"Sorry but you're stuck here for a day or two," Axel explained with a wave of his hand, "You passed out in the ambulance and this is the first time you've come to since last night. Seems you didn't eat anything yesterday and were prancing about town in nothing but your pajamas and a coat. They want to keep you under surveillance for quite a few reasons."

She couldn't blame them. "I went a little off the deep end," she confessed sadly, "I thought Sora was in danger, but he was just  _fine_." The bitterness in her voice grew as she added, "I'm such an idiot."

Axel's hand touched the top of hers. She was surprised by how warm his skin felt. Was she still that cold? "You're not an idiot, Kairi. Riku and I went looking for you and found out some things you need to know," he explained, "Trust me, there's nothing idiotic about you."

"Some things I need to know…?" He nodded, removing his hand from hers. Before he could jump into what Kairi felt like was going to be a long conversation, she grabbed his hand. He seemed confused as she brought it under the blanket with her own. "It's warm."

"Oh…anyway. I was going to tell you Riku and the others are here too."

Kairi furrowed her brow. "Who is others?"

"Everyone."

She gasped, "What?"

Axel seemed to enjoy her shock. He smirked and explained with a wag of his index finger, "Yep, you heard me. You had quite the search party looking for you last night. Hell, you scared us half to death. No one wanted to go home so we've been here all night, taking shifts. I'm just the lucky one who found you and got to be with you when you woke up."

Kairi felt an uncomfortable swell in her throat. She couldn't have asked for more supportive friends. "I can't believe it," she whispered with a smile, "How can I ever pay you all back for everything?"

Axel shook his head, his grin unfailing . "That's not how friendship works, shortstack. Now, there's something else you should know." Kairi raised a brow at his sudden seriousness. "Sora is here too."

Her face fell. "What? Why?" she demanded, suddenly feeling her turmoil resurge.

He hesitated. "You know what? I'll let him tell you himself."

Kairi felt her features soften. As much as she appreciated Axel saying that, she didn't want to be left alone with Sora. In fact, he was the last person she wanted to see in her weakened state. Just picturing his face made her want to cry.

She squeezed Axel's hand and requested, "Maybe it can wait till I'm out of here?"

Axel squeezed back. "Of course."

Kairi had been overwhelmed with happiness to see each of her friends. Axel went to fetch them all from the lobby after their talk. Hayner and Pence had brought her a teddy bear from the gift shop downstairs that said 'With lots of Love'. For some reason, Hayner felt the need to continually clarify that the love was platonic. Roxas had squeezed her arm and offered to get her a sea-salt ice cream before he was rudely reminded she was in the hospital for hypothermia. He quickly changed his offer to a hot chocolate.

Riku had assaulted her with questions about her well-being. Was she too cold? Was she too hot? How many fingers was he holding up? Did she have enough pillows? Kairi had allowed him fluff the ones she had just so he'd stop asking her questions. Olette, of course, had cried and hugged Kairi as tightly as the cords would allow. Xion had assured her they would be having a girl's weekend at Kairi's as soon as she was discharged.

True to their word, Xion and Olette were at her apartment now stuffing themselves with chocolate chip cookies and watching re-runs of Kairi's favorite sitcom, Island Days. It was filmed on Destiny Islands and she'd grown up watching it with her Aunt and Uncle. Somehow, the small dose of nostalgia was comforting.

As the current episode ended, Xion leaned close to her and whispered, "If you want me to, I'll cut it clean off." Olette gasped from her spot on the couch.

Kairi could only sigh. "Xion, that wouldn't fix anything."

She smirked. "I respectfully disagree."

As much as Kairi wished she could handle imagining Sora in pain, she still couldn't bear it. It seemed no matter how he hurt her she'd always want the best for him. On the other hand, she was not beyond pranks. "I wouldn't mind if you dyed his hair a crazy color or something, though," Kairi admitted with a shadow of a smile.

Xion seemed to like the idea too. She tapped her chin. "How about a buzzcut?"

Olette giggled, "Oh, he'd look awful!"

Kairi groaned, slouching into the couch cushions. "Why are we talking about him, anyway?"

Xion and Olette's smiles disappeared. "Sorry, just trying to get you prepared for your big talk," Xion divulged with an apologetic look, "They'll be here soon."

As nice as her girl's weekend had been, the talk with Sora had loomed over her, despite their best efforts. Like Axel, Riku had insisted Kairi speak to Sora one more time, promising she could be done with him afterward if she wanted. So, she'd reluctantly agreed.

She glanced at the clock and sighed. Riku was always prompt; no doubt he was dragging Sora down the street right now. Kairi yanked Xion into a hug, burying her face in the crook of her neck. "What more is there to even say?" she cried, "I don't want to look at him!"

Olette hugged Kairi's back, snuggling her head near her spine. "Riku and Axel wouldn't say you needed to hear something pointless," she assured, "They both care about you so much. It'll be over before you know it."

Kairi found herself nodding. "Thank you both for staying with me this weekend. I couldn't have functioned without you."

Xion gave her shoulder a squeeze. "Hey, what are friends for? We just want you to be okay. I know it can't be easy."

It wasn't easy at all. Kairi felt like she was stuck in a constant fog of pain and misery. Every time she fell too far into her memories, she became weepy and could border on inconsolable depending on how far she traveled. It was a wonder she didn't hate Sora, but that didn't mean she liked him either.

"When's your first counseling session?" Olette asked, "We should get dinner after or something."

Upon discharge, the hospital social worker had helped her make an appointment with a therapist, rather than give her referrals again. Kairi was a little nervous about starting to see someone, but she knew she needed help if she was going to be able to move past everything.

"It's Tuesday afternoon," she answered blankly, "Luckily I won't have to take off more work days. I've had to tap into my vacation-"

The door to her apartment swung open and Axel poked his head inside. "Knock knock," he announced as he stepped in, "Well, you three look cozy. Want a fourth?"

Xion stuck her tongue out at him. "Sorry, buddy. No boys allowed."

"Good thing I'm a  _man_  then."

She smirked. "Tell that to your collection of kid's toys."

Kairi jerked her head to look at him. "You never showed me those!"

Axel was clearly flustered, suspended in the doorway with his mouth agape. Finally he uttered, "The politically correct term is figurine."

The merriment of the room came to a sharp halt when Sora entered. Kairi's heart lurched and the urge to puke was intense. He didn't meet her eyes as he awkwardly shuffled in and stuck close to the wall without saying a word. Riku was immediately at his side and kept a hand on his arm as though to prevent him from running away.

Olette cleared her throat and hopped from her seat. "Guess that's our cue." Kairi frowned.

After Xion and Olette's heartfelt goodbyes, Riku, Sora, Axel, and herself were all that remained in the room. Riku placed a chair in front of Kairi's coffee table and forced Sora to sit in it. The brunette was wringing his hands and still hadn't met her eyes. Axel chose to lie on the floor with his hands behind his head while Riku took the seat next to her.

"Axel said there were things I needed to know," Kairi began, hoping she sounded more composed than she felt.

Riku was solemn. "You scared me, Kairi. I thought the worst when I hadn't heard from you and found your apartment unlocked and empty." Kairi winced; she'd completely forgotten about her lunch date with him that day. Sora's possible danger had eclipsed any other plans she had. "Axel and I figured out the clue in the drawings you left, but when we got to the mansion you were already gone. Sora and Naminé were still there, however."

Kairi closed her eyes. The ominous feeling that this conversation would be like the one at the coffee shop was settling over her. She wanted to believe Riku and Axel wouldn't put her through that. Surely, they wouldn't ask her to seriously listen to Sora pleading for her to come back to him? Not after...not after this.

"It was Naminé, Kai." She dared open one eye to look at Riku's pale face. "She sent all of that to you. It wasn't a coincidence that you saw what you saw. She wanted you to suffer and give up on Sora so she could finally have him."

Kairi laughed bitterly. It was ridiculously unbelievable. She didn't know which was the funniest part. The fact that she'd once thought Naminé looked like an angel or that she'd ever believed Sora had ever called things off between them. "I don't know what to say," she breathed through her spasms, "This is all too much."

"I couldn't agree more," Riku muttered, "But it only gets worse." Kairi's laughter stopped. What could be worse? "Naminé is also the reason Sora hasn't been himself." She opened her mouth to interrupt but Riku shook his head at her. "I'm not defending him at all,  _trust me_. But take a good look at him, Kairi, and tell me what you see."

Sora shifted uncomfortably under her reluctant stare. Looking at him was like looking at a stranger. She was immediately drawn to the expression on his face. He seemed so tired, so fearful. The warm glow of his skin had disappeared. In fact, Sora had never looked grayer, almost like ash. Kairi frowned. She reached out to him and he flinched.

"What did she do to him?" she asked, suddenly alarmed.

"It seems she messed with his entire concept of reality. I haven't been able to get too much out of him, but I saw it first hand," Riku confessed, presumably shuddering at his memories. Kairi could hear the strain in his voice. He was clearly as bothered by Sora's appearance and behavior as she was. "Sora," he called turning to the trembling man, "Tell Kairi what happened."

Sora swallowed loudly. "I know it looks bad," he hesitated, shooting anxious glances to everything in the room but her, "She must've…she wasn't thinking. Nam didn't even want to hurt you. It's just that she loves me so much. She needed me, Kai."

He paused, seemingly overwhelmed. His hands clenched in his lap. "I never wanted you to get hurt, either. I thought I could- she told me she could help me get you back. But I had to...I'm sorry...You understand, don't you?"

Kairi couldn't believe or understand what she was hearing. Sora sounded so spineless and pathetic. His explanation was worse than what he'd told her at the Golden Brew. At least then he'd had conviction in his voice. "No, I can't say that I do," Kairi admitted with a deepening frown. She hadn't thought it was possible for her heart to break anymore, but once again, she'd been proven wrong.

"Hey Sora, why don't you show Kairi some of Naminé's sketches?" Riku suggested.

Sora's eyes lit up momentarily. He pulled his phone from his pocket, typed in the pass code, and flipped to his gallery. Within seconds, he was at Kairi's side explaining the pictures he'd taken of Naminé's sketchbook. They were done in the exact same style and colors as the ones Kairi had received in the mail. She felt her body begin to shake again. It was one thing for Sora to cheat on her. It was something else for him to be manipulated and abused in the process.

"What happens now?" she asked Riku, "How does he get better?"

"He had a moment of clarity last night before he began second-guessing everything again," Riku answered, "He told me he needed to get away from here to get her out of his head. Sora's decided to resign tomorrow."

Kairi's mouth dropped. He was going to resign? She glanced from Riku to Sora. "What?" she yelped, causing Sora to drop his phone on the floor. He seemed to wobble about as he bent over to retrieve it.

"Yeah, I'm resigning," he confirmed with a nervous smile, "I have to leave, Kai." He looked toward the floor. "Half the time, it seems like I can't trust any thought that I have. I want to ask Naminé what to do for everything. And Riku's helping me see that she's been… the opposite of helpful."

"But where will you go?" Kairi questioned. Her mind was racing. She never thought he'd resign, not from the job he loved so much.

"First, I'm gonna go back to the islands. From there, I'll let my heart decide. If it even can anymore…"

"I'm going with him, Kai," Riku piped up, "Someone's got to make sure he doesn't get himself into more trouble." Kairi's face fell. She should've known that would be the case. Riku would want to be with Sora every step of his recovery. Noticing her crestfallen expression, he added, "It won't be forever. Just till Sora can get his head on straight."

She sighed and nodded. Kairi couldn't deny that getting away is what would be best for Sora. As disturbed as she was about what had happened, she still wanted him to be well and of a sound mind. He looked so conflicted and troubled.

"When will you leave?"

"Tomorrow evening," Riku replied with a sympathetic look.

Kairi frowned. "But that's so soon!"

He cracked a smile. "We're just going to the islands, Kai. Besides, I'll make sure to come and say goodbye."

She didn't like it, but she supposed she would have to deal. "All right, then. Make sure you bring  _him_  with you," she relented, pointing her index finger at Sora.

Sora audibly gasped, "You want me to say goodbye?"

If she'd had enough strength, she would've shoved him. "Of course! I have to send you off. It's tradition," Kairi argued, temper rising, "Or have you forgotten that too?" Sora shook his head and said nothing more. "I also expect letters weekly on top of texts and phone calls."

"I didn't expect you to ask for anything less demanding," Riku teased. Kairi feigned a glare; she knew Riku would be happy to comply with her request. He popped up from his seat and announced, "Sora and I are going to step out for a bit now."

Kairi was about to protest. She wanted to spend as much time as she could with Riku before he left, but she caught Axel looking at her. "Okay," she managed as Riku and Sora awkwardly exited the room. Axel remained on the floor like he was waiting to be called over.

"Kairi, Riku asked me to look after you," Axel admitted with his eyes focused on the ceiling, "But I told him I wasn't sure you'd want that."

"What do you mean?"

He shrugged. "I just don't know how you feel about me checking in on you and asking you about things."

She wanted to argue with him and say it would be fine. She wanted to laugh and ask him if he heard himself correctly. Instead, she remained as quiet as a mouse. Despite him coming to her rescue again, Kairi was still hesitant. But she also knew Riku wouldn't have requested that of Axel if he didn't trust him. If Riku could trust him with her well-being, maybe she could let him in, even if it was only bit by bit.

"Axel, come over here, please." He obediently slinked into the spot Riku had vacated. "Give me your hand." He consented without argument. She smacked it.

"Hey!" He tried to rip his hand from her grasp but she held it firm.

Kairi took in a deep breath and began her rant, "Axel, enough of this. What happened is in the past, okay? Let's stop tip toeing around each other like one of us is going to break. Yeah, you meddled big time, but that doesn't mean the solution is to feel weird asking me how I feel for the rest of our friendship. I know I'm hesitant and not forthcoming with information, but if I didn't want you with me I wouldn't have asked you to be my friend."

Axel was watching her with a look of amusement on his face. "Oh?"

She blushed uncontrollably and panicked as a result. What reason did she have to be flustered? He'd simply made a sound.

"And that's the issue," Axel concluded with a huff, "You get all squirrely with me."

She puffed up her cheeks. "Well, you get all gaspy with me!"

He raised a brow. "Gaspy?"

Kairi caressed the back of his hand, eliciting a satisfactory hiss from him. "Exactly!"

Axel chuckled under his breath. Kairi liked the sound more than she wanted to. She watched as his eyes fluttered close. He sunk back into her couch without removing his hand from hers. She settled back too, eyes still on his pensive form.

It was too much to admit there was a reason she woke from her nightmares seeking his attention. It was too much for her to accept that it was him that kept from her reawakening any past feelings for Sora. These emotions she harbored were reckless and horribly timed. They were the last thing she needed as she recovered from the blow Sora and Naminé had dealt her.

But as she stared holes into the hand she was holding, she realized she didn't want to let go. Hadn't she earned the right to be a little selfish? Couldn't she enjoy the comfort he brought her a little longer?

"Are you saying you want me to keep eye on you?" Axel hummed. Thankfully, his eyes were still closed.

"The others will be there for me."

"I thought you might say that. Xion and Olette will-"

"I meant that they'd be able to help you." He opened one eye. Kairi felt herself grow more flustered. "I'm a bit of a handful sometimes. Seems I land myself in the hospital more often than I'd like…"

"More often than I'd like too," Axel jested, "I need to get you a life alert necklace."

Kairi laughed and shook her head. "Come here so I can push you."

He dutifully leaned toward her with an exaggerated groan. She raised a brow. "I'm just fulfilling my promise. Told ya I'd be whatever you needed."

She grabbed the flaps of his jacket and pulled him closer. Wrapping her arms around his shoulders, she held him against her and let out a long sigh. "Then just be yourself, okay?"

His arms found their way around her as he replied, "I'm not sure that's good enough. I'm a piece of work myself."

Kairi allowed herself to sink deeper. Relishing in his warmth, she found herself whispering, "Maybe I can help you too."

"How do you propose to do that?" Goosebumps spread across her skin as she indulged in this moment of relief.

She wriggled slightly to free her arms, cupping the sides of his face with her palms. His skin was rough from the facial hair he meticulously shaved each morning. "We can watch over each other."

Axel's eyes seemed to haze; her words hopefully touching his heart. The magnetism between them was different this time. A blanket of contentment had fallen around them. Kairi didn't feel as though she was being charmed, she felt safe. He suddenly cleared his throat and broke their captivating gaze. "Do you think we could trust each other too?" he asked hesitantly.

"Trust is earned, Axel."

He nodded and said nothing else. Kairi's hands dropped from his face; her heart sinking with them. Was he already discouraged?

"I'll earn it, even if I have to wait years and years. You're worth it." His answer startled her. She couldn't believe him, but then again, why shouldn't she? He'd always been this way for as long as she'd known him. Axel, next to Riku, was her greatest support. "By the way, call me Lea."

"Are you sure?" Kairi gasped. She'd never forgotten what he'd told her on the clocktower. The pain in his eyes had been so poignant.

"Yes, just not in front of everyone else," he requested with an almost bashful expression, "Not sure I'm ready for all that yet, but I want you to call me my name at least."

Kairi felt her stomach flutter. "Lea," she tested gently, "I like the sound of it." They found each other's eyes again and Kairi felt the fluttering travel to the rest of her body. And instead of fighting the feeling, she let it settle over her, enjoying his embrace and attentive care. His arms tightened around her, and she rested her head on his shoulder, breathing in his spicy scent. She would miss Riku dearly, and perhaps even Sora once the sting faded. But with Lea at her side, she was sure she would manage just fine.

"Say, Kairi," he began curiously, "It doesn't feel like you're wearing a bra..."

Kairi shrieked and finally shoved him away.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the official end of the story. Please stay tuned for the epilogue!


	45. Epilogue

_Is this real? How is it possible for me to be so happy?_

Kairi was finally the blushing bride. She was bursting with anticipation, glowing with a radiance she was completely aware of, as she stood outside the closed doors to the wedding hall. This was her moment. No, this was  _their_ moment and it couldn't come soon enough.

"Kairi."

She turned, delighted to hear his voice. It took all her self restraint not to jump on him as he approached. Sensing her frenetic energy, Riku chuckled and placed a hand on her bare shoulder. "Try not to drag me down the aisle, all right?"

Kairi giggled, "Then you better keep up. Nothing's going to keep me from him."

Riku was dressed in a fine, black tuxedo. His silver hair was cut short again, bangs no longer obstructing his vision. Kairi could clearly see his eyes gleaming with mirth as he smiled.

"For what it's worth, I don't think anything's going to keep  _him_  from  _you_ , either." He handed her two, pink peonies. She took them gently, daring to stroke the delicate petals with her fingers. "You look beautiful, Kai."

Kairi's wedding gown was mostly composed of white lace and tulle. The off-the-shoulder, sheer sleeves had crystallized, lace designs woven into the material that looked as though her arms had been covered in jewels. The elegant artistry also covered its heart-shaped bodice. The skirt flowed freely from her waist and was long enough in the back to trail behind her.

"Thank you. Will you-?" she requested, gesturing to the veil atop her head attached by a crown of wild flowers.

Riku nodded and placed the thin fabric over her face. He offered her his arm and she looped hers through, tightly. It was finally time.

"Kairi, I just want to say that this is an honor. I know you wished your father or your uncle, could've-"

She silenced him with a smile. Riku wasn't wrong. Kairi would've loved to be walked down the aisle by her father or her uncle, or even her aunt. But they were all gone now. "Everything's perfect, Riku. There's no one else I'd want by my side." Riku's face lit up.

The double doors before them began to open to reveal the small, ornate hall. Kairi was breathless. The bright, colorful rays cast into the space by the stained glass windows were ethereal and illuminated every surface in the room. On either side of the blue, carpeted aisle were rows of transparent chairs where her loved ones stood waiting.

Riku took the lead and began their walk. Kairi had never felt so full of jitters.

To her right, she could see Selphie, Wakka, and Tidus happily waving at her. She was so grateful they'd come to Radiant Garden. She and Riku paused in front of their row so they could each hand her two sunflowers. She gathered them with the peonies in her hand, letting her fingers grace the pink stone on her golden, engagement ring. The ring she'd been so carefully offered.

" _...I've said it before and I'll say it now. There's no one else for me but you. But I'll stop yapping. How about it, Kairi? Can you trust me to handle the rest?"_

Riku led her to the left, where a gray haired man she vaguely remembered was standing. She was pretty sure she'd met him at one of Roxas and Xion's parties. His face remained expressionless as he handed her two, white lilies from the sleeve of his blue suit. Though, she could've sworn there was a hint of tenderness in his singularly visible, blue eye. He nodded to her as they began walking away.

Hayner, Pence, and Olette were next. Olette's eyes were brimming with tears as she handed Kairi two, pink roses. Kairi felt her own mist as she took a moment to embrace her. Olette knew better than most what she had been through to get to this day. Hayner handed her two stems of yellow acacia blooms with a grin. He then put his arm around his wife's waist to try and comfort her. Pence gave Kairi two, yellow roses and whispered his congratulations.

Riku gingerly nudged her as they moved on. A silent gesture of comfort that was  _so_  appreciated. Kairi blinked back the tears that threatened to fall. It was too early in the ceremony for her to get weepy.

Roxas and Xion were waiting for her next. Both of their faces were flushed with joy. Kairi could distinctly feel the swollen bump of Xion's abdomen when they hugged. Xion took a moment to straighten the necklace around Kairi's neck and then took a step back. Roxas passed two, pink alstroemeria flowers to her. Before she could properly gather them in her hands, a small child pushed through Roxas's pants with a laugh.

Kairi giggled, released Riku's arm, and stooped down to give the boy a hug. He had his mother's raven hair and his father's blue eyes. He kissed her cheek and offered the baby's breath clutched in his tiny hand. "For Auntie Kaa-ree!"

"Thank you!" She rubbed her hand into his hair, making him laugh again, before standing and rejoining Riku. Kairi was nearly at the head of the hall now. She could feel  _his_  loving gaze on her as she walked, though she avoided his eyes. She was feeling more bashful by the minute.

To her left, Sora was waiting for her, in the last row, with the biggest grin plastered on his tanned face. She grinned back, stopping in front of him. He teetered on his heels with his hands hidden behind his back.

She eyed him. "Don't tell me you forgot," Kairi chided playfully.

"I already told you, Kai. I'm not going to forget anything else," he replied with a wink.

Sora had stayed true to his word. She would never forget the first letter she received from him. It'd been ten months after his departure, and in it he'd explained everything that happened and what he'd learned. His honesty had been the first step to repairing the damage that had been done to their friendship. Kairi's therapy sessions and Sora's restraining order against Naminé were also fundamental steps in rebuilding the broken trust.

His years away had been good for him. The sweet, caring boy she'd known had resurfaced and replaced the deceitful, workaholic that had broken her heart. Sora had no plans to ever return to the university. Instead, he'd chosen to work with his cousin, Ventus, as a travel guide so he could keep exploring and learning.

Kairi and Riku kept to the tradition of sending him off and celebrating his homecomings. But Kairi would never forget their initial return. It had a special place in her heart.

* * *

_I waited on the dock of the island with Sora and Riku's letters in my lap. I'd been reading through a few of my favorites to pass the time._

_They'd had so many adventures. Sora had surfed the roofs of the marketplace in Agrabah with its Sultan and accidentally destroyed half the shops. Riku and Sora had competed against each other in the carnival games in Disney Town and won special ice cream cones. Sora re-discovered the meaning of love in a place called Halloween Town, but his explanation of doors and skeletal people didn't quite make sense. Riku griped about how Sora got them thrown around by gorillas in a jungle. And Sora detailed how he had to drag Riku out of a deal with a cruel woman named Maleficent._

_However, my personal favorite was Riku's description of Sora's questionable musical performance in Atlantica. Apparently, he hummed the tune all the time much to Riku's chagrin._

" _Kairi!"_

_My head shot up at the sound of their calls. I leapt from the dock and into the water, running and swimming to the boat that was slowly approaching._

_Sora grinned at me, blue eyes gleaming with a happiness I hadn't seen in years. The vibrance had returned to his skin. He was exuding confidence. Even his hair seemed spikier…_

" _We're back!" he announced, offering me a gloved hand as I waded toward them in the warm water._

_His face was as bright as the sun, but rather than let myself be blinded, I smirked. I took his hand and yanked him into the water. Sora resurfaced quickly and spewed out a gulp of ocean. "Hey!" he whined, rubbing the wet hair out of his eyes. "What was that for?"_

_I giggled mischievously, "Welcome home!"_

_Riku sighed from his spot in the boat. He'd also been caught in the splash. "You two can never act your age, can you?"_

_Sora and I exchanged a conspiratorial glance. "Nope," I answered, before helping Sora flip the boat._

* * *

"Here." He tucked the snowdrop blooms he'd brought into Kairi's growing bouquet. She bit down on her lip, attempting to hold back the feelings that were rushing through her. Kairi had no regrets, but the thought that it could've been Sora... Their eyes met once more and she knew he was thinking the same thing. She couldn't stop herself from pulling him close.

Sora held her carefully, doing his best not to damage her flowers. "I'm happy for you, really. You deserve all the happiness in the worlds, Kairi," he whispered into her ear, voice shaking, "Go get him."

"Thank you, Sora. That means...everything."

Riku gently led her away. He hadn't said a word, but his breathing seemed shallower. She squeezed his arm tighter as they paused at the foot of the short steps that led to Lea. Kairi finally met his gaze, allowing herself to sink into the obvious love he was sending her way. The calming effect he had on her had only increased with time.

Riku escorted her up the stairs and placed her hand into Lea's. He whispered his congratulations briefly and started to leave.

"Riku, wait."

He turned and Kairi could see the internal struggle written on his features. She couldn't think of any other time she'd seen his face painted with such raw emotion. Kairi tugged him back to her by the sleeve of his suit and reached up to place a kiss on his cheek. His face colored and it seemed like he couldn't stagger away quickly enough.

"Y'know, I don't think I've ever seen Riku so...tickled pink," Lea joked with a smile.

Kairi giggled, "I'd say it's about time."

"I couldn't agree more, sweetheart." And she knew he wasn't talking about Riku anymore.

Lea lifted the veil from her face, letting it billow behind her head. Her eyes closed as he tucked a piece of her short, red hair behind her ear. She relished in the familiar feeling.

* * *

_I watched as Lea mindlessly consumed his ice cream, careful to not let a drop escape his mouth. He wasn't looking at me. His green gaze was traveling across the horizon to some far off place I could never seem to find. He grew more pensive with every visit we made to the clock tower._

" _It's gonna melt if you don't eat it, princess."_

_I raised the stick to my mouth but Lea beat me to it. "Lea!" I cried as he took a huge bite of my popsicle. Lea smirked as he swirled the treat in his mouth and swallowed._

" _It didn't look like you wanted it anymore," he defended with a laugh._

" _Now you have to give me some of yours," I demanded, reaching for the bar in his hand._

_He expertly swung it out of my grasp and held it beyond reach. "Now, now, no need to be aggressive. I'll give you what you want if you ask nicely."_

_Somehow, his words flustered me. "Nicely?"_

" _Of course. I can't go around denying ladies what they've asked for nicely, can I?"_

_His words seemed like a trap. A trap I was willing to risk getting caught in. "Okay, would you please share with me?" I requested sweetly._

_Lea lowered his ice cream and offered it to me without further fuss. It was all very anti-climatic. I found myself frowning. Part of me had believed that he was trying to…well, finish something we'd started a while ago._

_It wasn't that I hadn't thought about trying again with Lea. It'd never left my mind, not once. But every time it seemed like we might address the white elephant between us, nothing happened._

" _At this rate mine is gonna melt too," Lea complained, accidentally waving his melting bar in my face and splattering my cheek._

_For the second time, I yelped, "Lea!"_

_Rather than express concern, he howled and more ice cream ended up on my face. I growled and flung what remained of mine at him. The cream trickled down from his fiery hairline and toward his eyes._

" _We look like a couple of kids now. Are ya happy?" he reproached, attempting to pick out pieces of blue bar from his hair. "I'll have to ride the train like this."_

" _You can shower at my place," I offered without a second thought. He raised a brow incredulously. I hesitated, "...What?"_

_He paused, tapped his chin, and then shook his head. "I'll pass."_

_I furrowed my brow. "What do you mean you'll pass? You're covered in ice cream, like me."_

_He eyed me steadily. His look was startling. I nervously bit down on my lip, and Lea groaned and looked away. My face burned. Why had I done that? I knew what that..._ wait.

" _Lea, is this about me?" I nearly squeaked._

_He smacked his hand against his sticky forehead. "Of course it is! Can't you see how in love I am with you?" I blinked at his strained words. He was clearly exasperated. "I thought you knew...all this time... Did you think I'd stopped?"_

_I looked away, staring at my dangling feet. I wasn't blind. I just thought he might've caught on to how I felt by now. But how could he have? We'd been skillfully dancing around each other. Longing glances disturbed by playful jests. Brief touches interrupted by anxious jumps and shifts away. Excuses offered instead of the truth._

_Lea sighed heavily and gently brushed some ice cream from my face. I inwardly shuddered. "Look, I didn't mean to-"_

_If he could be honest, so could I. I reached out and cupped his chin. Lea sputtered as I brought his face to mine and kissed him. I opened my eyes to meet his stunned silence._

" _No,_ I'm  _sorry, Lea. I've been afraid. I've known that I loved you all this time, but I was just so scared of what happened before."_

_His eyes softened. "That's why I never said anything. I didn't want to pressure you."_

" _I appreciate that, but maybe I needed a little bit of a nudge," I admitted with a shy smile, "If I ask nicely, think we could try that again?"_

_Lea smiled too, taking a moment to study my face. "Nah, you don't have to ask." He moved a few strands of hair out of my face and tucked them behind my ear. "I'll gladly give you what you want."_

* * *

Kairi divided the bouquet in her hands, and handed half of the flowers to Lea so that they both had an even amount of every type. Together they tucked both halves into the glass vase on the table next to them. The vase had a chain of pearls and lace wrapped around it; their names were inscribed into its surface. Lea retrieved the red tulip that had been lying on the table. He knelt down with flourish and presented it to her.

She rolled her eyes and took it from him, breathing in its sweet smell. He moved to stand, but Kairi held him down with her hand. After placing the tulip in their vase, she turned to the white box on the table.

With a smirk, she placed it into Lea's hands. He peered at its surface quizzically. "Open it," she commanded, doing her best not to laugh.

Lea carefully lifted the box's top and peered inside. He snorted and couldn't seem to stop himself from throwing his head back and chortling. The sound echoed off the walls and soon Kairi was laughing too.

"R-Really?" he howled, "You got me this!?"

Her smirk widened. "Most people say thank you after receiving a present."

Lea cleared his throat and stood. "Ex _cuse_  me, you're right. Thank you, Kairi. Thank you for the cactus." He freed the plant from its box and placed it next to the vase. Several red blooms were popping out from its prickly exterior.

The graying minister rose from his seat in the audience and instructed them through the rest of the ceremony. Rings were exchanged. Vows were delivered. And now, the traditional, Radiant Garden sash was being wrapped around the two of them as they held hands. Kairi admired the shimmering, white fabric as the man expertly tucked the end between the palms of their hands.

There was only one thing left to do.

Kairi met Lea's eyes. He looked so sure, so confident, that it gave her strength. Her eyes closed as his face drifted closer. Her heart steadied with the touch of his lips. This was it; Lea was it.

She listened as she was happily pronounced Mrs. Fierro. Kairi might've said something or reacted to the raucous cheers, but she was more than a little preoccupied.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you SO much for sticking with me and reading this story in its entirety. You are all magnificent beings and I am so grateful for you. Every review/favorite/kudo I have received has meant so much to me.
> 
> Going into this, I wanted to experiment with unpopular pairings and character psyches, and I have to say it's been one heck of a ride. If you've looked me up, I think it's obvious that I am a hardcore Sora and Kairi shipper, so this story truly pushed me out of my element. I only intended this to be a short, 20-chapter, round of fun, but as things like this usually go, it became a project that encompassed my waking and sleeping moments. It took so much plotting and planning and often exhausted me, but there were other moments where I simply couldn't stop writing because I was so immersed in the plot I'd concocted. I hope you felt the same reading it and that it also came alive for you.
> 
> Some things to note about the story... Let's see. In it's original state, I intended the role of Axel/Lea to be played by Roxas. I'm sure you can see, uh, why I made that change. Roxas doesn't quite have the charm or the personality qualities required for the role. Riku never had a role in the original plot, either! And now I can't imagine this without him in it. In the original, Kairi was also going to succumb and cheat on Sora while he was cheating on her. Sora was always meant to be kinda a scum bag because I wanted to explore a different side of him (I'm so sorry, Sora! I didn't mean it!). It was a whole mess. So I took that and edited and ran with it, I've been working on this damn thing since I was 19? I'm pleased with how it turned out, though, and I hope you are as well.
> 
> This plot was crafted from my 'what ifs' mostly. I wanted it to mirror CoM, in the sense that it is a journey of Sora losing himself. What if Nam actually was cruel enough to manipulate Sora into being her slave? What if Kairi was aware of Sora when he was being mislead? What would it take for Kairi to begin to fall for someone else? What if I gave Axel a place to run wild? What if Xion was more sassy and confident than she's portrayed? What if they were older? How could adult themes change their interactions? This was great. I had so much fun!
> 
> As always, I'm overjoyed to hear your thoughts. Please feel to reach out to me if you have any questions, comments, or concerns.

**Author's Note:**

> Hi! Aerith here. This is my first time posting anything on AO3 so I'm excited to get involved. This story is a re-posting, but I hope you'll enjoy it regardless. Comments are always appreciated.


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